/tg/Station 13

Posted: **Tue Apr 12, 2016 2:32 pm**

Bottom post of the previous page:

PKPenguin321 wrote:>join server, it's metastation
>right as i join the round starts so i have to latejoin
>join as detective since he's one of the jobs i enjoy more
>get my gear, walking around, looking for trouble
>at the bar i find a fresh murder case
>drag the corpse down to medbay and try to clone but the guy already left
>take his corpse to my office in a bodybag and put him in my morgue tray
>scan all the things
>place police barriers, draw a body outline, take pictures of the murder scene
>collect evidence for days
>back to the office
>print out scanner report
>backcheck every single fingerprint and DNA readout
>create a paper for the suspects and their fingerprint/DNA data
>create a paper for my theories on what happened and my conclusion on who to interrogate
>carefully label each paper
>put it all into a folder, even the picture, ask the HoS for permission to interrogate the dudes
>super hyped for real detective work
>go to ask HoS, Miku, for permission to set to arrest and interrogate the prime suspects
>Miku: "Cover me for a second, I think it's gangs"
>follow Miku out with revolver drawn
>some dude busted a cell window and runs out, placed water above the cell
>set myself to walk and try to pursue
>slip on it anyways, it's lube!
>try to tell miku but it's too late, she tried to chase too and also slipped, but she slipped out of the brig whiel I was still inside
>dude outside blasts her to death with a shotgun to the face
>grab her snowflake HoS laser gun
>try so hard to pursue but most doors are bolted
>gravity goes out so i can't fucking move for shit
>get into the halls and follow the blood trails with my expert detective skills
>find the bastard with the corpse in the medbay lobby, he has a taser drawn
>try to evade but le nogravity
>get tased and lased
>gangs have fucked up the entire station and i was probably boned anyways
>all i wanted to do was real detective work
>i was this close to cracking the Aekhi Murder Case
>my case file is still in my backpack and will never be touched by anybody again
>Miku claims i pushed her into the lube in deadchat and hates me
>tfw you just wanted to be a gumshoe

Posted: **Tue Apr 12, 2016 6:07 pm**

I learned that throwing a lighter at a room full of gas doesn't cause the gas burn out quickly.

Posted: **Tue Apr 12, 2016 6:12 pm**

> Xenobio for five rounds straight.
> Trying to get green eyes spider so I can be spiderman.
> Every single time I get killed just when I spawn one by some traitor fuck when I'm not even their target.
> killed this time by a pair of armblade changelings having a murderbone.
> Only reason I didn't OOC was because it wouldn't matter.
> Other xeno science guy sentience the spider.
> Someone else gets it.

I'm going on goon for a bit.

EDIT:
> Round eight.
> Everything ready to go.
> Aurora zeal runs in, late joinscience.
> Tell her to piss off.
> Ignores me.
> cannot kill her for her actions, calm down Pablo, remember what buddha teaches.
> Never get spiders, she uses all the monkeys on black slimes.
> scream in rage.
> Shuttle called because nuke ops and tesla loose and sabotage and some shit, fucking hell when did Basil rounds stop after an hour, used to be able to hit the five hour mark, the fuck happened.
> Pray to gods to throw me a bone, they give me a cookie.
> rage takes hold.
> Kill myseflf because it's getting pointless now.
> Put in OOC, eight rounds and no spiders.
> Eat a temp ban for icky ocky.

Yeah, gonna start murdering people who touch the consoles as late joining scientists...and probably just give in and stop even bothering to try and RP, no-one does, even bagil has become a town of wordless shitlers looting and pushing; it's all gone wrong. Fucking hub.

Posted: **Tue Apr 12, 2016 9:23 pm**

literally just happened

>be joseph mcjohn
>time for carg--
>"NUKE OPS DECLARE WAR"
>go to get borged
>no one there
>suicide
>"Would you like to play as Cayenne?"
>oh fuck yeah
>awesome! I get to be a space carp!
>suddenly autist nuke op pulls out medibeam
>"WOWEEE I HAVE MEDIBEAM TOO!"
>cross
>boom
>im instantly killed

I am fucking dying.

Posted: **Wed Apr 13, 2016 12:31 am**

just now
>normal assistant
>suddenly centcomm announcement about a cooking show
>get chef access and try to get nominated
>Get nominated with INTERNAL DISCUSSIONS and a black guy
>grab ketchup and an apron, then go to the centcomm shuttle
>there are 3 judges, and the cooking stations are underprepared
>have to make 4 different dishes
>they give us a fuck ton of plants on a few tables
>sift through them to find good ingredients
>black guy gets himself killed
>INTERNAL DISCUSSIONS just makes a bunch of mushroom dishes and pours some of the guys blood on it
>judge says he will give extra points to anyone who uses the black guys meat
>plan hatches
>make fish and chips
>use my ketchup packet
>boil some eggs and eggplants to make double dongs
>use money fruits and a carrot shive to make "bribery and threats"
>turn the black guy into a faggot, call the dish the "op"
>INTERNAL DISCUSSIONS still literally just has 3 bowls of the same mushrooms and eggplant, one covered in blood
>did I mention a borg came to "Watch"?
>I actually have 4 dishes unlike INTERNAL DISCUSSIONS
>they say I should win
>judges give me 3 2s and a 3 for the "op"
>gives INTERNAL DISCUSSIONS 5, 6, and 5
>you fucking what
>they say they also have to prepare a dish of my meat
>you fucking what
>they give them an egun
>you fucking what
>I use my sick jukes to make them empty their gun
>im gonna kill em with a cleaver
>borg valids me to death
>I yell about cheating in my last breath but nobody cares
>they just make a fucking lizard burger and a sandwich
>judges give them a tesla in return
>round ends

that was a fun as fuck event but seriously fuck that ending, otherwise that is my favorite event ever, it was great to have a use for the chef.

Posted: **Wed Apr 20, 2016 5:16 pm**

>Latejoin HoP
>Shift is lame as fuck
>Literally dead boring, just wandering around the station
>Warden I saw earlier is standing at the upload
>Ask what's up
>Says someone's in the upload
>Oh, something at last!
>Tell AI to open the door
>It refuses
>Threaten to card it if I could be assed
>Go to camera console to see if anything's there
>Nothing but a malf APC
>Welp that was predictable
>Go to R&D for a jackhammer to crack the sat open
>They're out of diamonds but after yelling at the miners everything works out
>Go to the sat after grabbing the CE hardsuit
>See the suspicious as hell replacement captain in engineering, the CMO
>Leave quickly
>About to break in when the R&D scientist asks if I killed the AI yet
>Nearly have an aneurysm from the stupidity of him yelling that over comms when I was trying to stealth kill the AI
>Card the AI effortlessly anyways
>It tries to say it's not rogue
>I can see your law zero you idiot
>The suspicious CMO shows up outside and hovers silently near me
>Ok fucker you're getting searched
>Disable and search
>Clean, but he runs screaming that I'm rogue like an autist
>Have a bag full of medical shit now
>Return to the bridge while the AI and CMO keep screaming I'm rogue
>HoS confronts me at some point and demands to see the AI
>Tell him no when the CMO bursts in and tries to taze me
>Hits the HoS and I dodge behind cover and shoot back
>HoS helps me and we bag the CMO
>He's still screaming like an autist
>HoS demands to see the AI again
>Ugh FINE but I want it back
>HoS takes the card and says he's keeping it
>No I don't think so
>Disable him and get the AI back
>Now THREE people are screaming I'm rogue
>Take the HoS to the brig to try and talk to the warden who'll back me up
>They aren't there
>CMO tries to attack me
>Fails horribly
>Leave the HoS somewhere
>Go to the cap's office to call it and try to figure out how to get these three autists to shut up
>A new AI was apparently built and they're all over my shit
>Sigh
>Run again
>Spacetime suddenly lags nearly to a crash twice
>Get caught by the HoS and CMO
>CMO is cucked beyond description but after me saying for the tenth time that the AI was rogue he understands
>They strip me and throw me out instead of executing me or something
>Ah fuck this round anyways
>Suicide

What a shitshow

Posted: **Wed Apr 20, 2016 5:53 pm**

You could've just let the HoS have the AI card. It's not like anything bad would've happened.

Posted: **Wed Apr 20, 2016 6:41 pm**

ShadowDimentio wrote:>Latejoin HoP
>HoS helps me and we bag the CMO
>He's still screaming like an autist
>HoS demands to see the AI again
>Ugh FINE but I want it back
>HoS takes the card and says he's keeping it
>No I don't think so
>Disable him and get the AI back

Why would you do that

Posted: **Wed Apr 20, 2016 9:28 pm**

It's not that I was worried something bad would happen, it's because I carded the AI, not him, making it MINE! REEEEEEEEE!

Posted: **Wed Apr 20, 2016 11:31 pm**

Pretty much what I thought when I saw it. My impulse control as a spess man is so shot that I once chlorald the warden, removed most ofhis organs and then made him retarded as the CMO for stealing the surgical tools without asking. I thought he was remarkably restrained by only disabling him.

Posted: **Thu Apr 21, 2016 11:25 pm**

> Finally get an antag
> Server crashes after five minutes.

Happens again and again. REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Posted: **Thu Apr 21, 2016 11:40 pm**

>Join round.
> It's gang.
> Lowpop so I cannot kill myself because I'd feel guilty.

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 12:04 am**

>traitor doctor
>get emag, storage implant, emp flashlight, agent card, and traitor key
>only one on it is the ai
>ai is nice
>ai lets me into vault to get syndie docs
>kill cmo with emagged defib and go loud
>use their defib to kill most of science
>get super power cell
>basically able to stun 30 times before running out (I almost run out but never do)
>defib sec officer
>emp sec officer
>get flashed
>defib myself
>get crowded by 2 angry scientists
>get up RIGHT on time to sax, slip him, and beat him to death with his baton
>kill the rest of science
>get like 5 golems
>shuttle docks
>kill everyone because ai helped
>gg
>in shuttle medbay after emagged to leave, shuttle is clear except cargo part wasn't checked yet
>mule sprints in
>kills in less than 2 seconds
>ai wins at least
mulebots are fair and balanced

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 12:08 am**

OP trash to kill other OP trash

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 12:19 am**

Zilenan91 wrote:OP trash to kill other OP trash

bruh
the defib is a way shorter stun than you think, about as long as a baton or maybe even shorter
it takes 2-3 seconds to recharge the defib after a stun so you cant spam it
it runs out of battery no matter what mode you use
in kill mode, it still takes longer to kill than the stun lasts
basically all I did was murderbone with a stunbaton with a larger battery considering it was only viable to kill them using fire extinguishers, not the defib itself.

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 12:24 am**

Not if you have cuffs/zipties, you can disarm defib > harm defib and kill anybody

Now I'm not saying we should nerf emagged defibs because they're great but yeah they're very powerful

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 1:22 am**

Zilenan91 wrote:Not if you have cuffs/zipties, you can disarm defib > harm defib and kill anybody

Now I'm not saying we should nerf emagged defibs because they're great but yeah they're very powerful

you can ALSO beat somebody to death with a hatchet in that time, and you can get a stun prod and hatchet just from arrivals. it takes like 8 seconds just to do the heart attack.

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 5:24 pm**

>get messily spaced out of escape with uncleaned blood trail
>nonantag janitor oli canoli wordlessly mops up the blood trail leading out of an airlock

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 7:01 pm**

Daily reminder that Janitor players are cucklords.

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 7:50 pm**

janitor is the low-key grief job, and when people get mad at you and retaliate for it you can go on the forums and complain because "its muh job"

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 8:31 pm**

Just now
>Have a rollercoaster of a shaft miner round with a cult that lasts 2 hours and half the people die
>work with the rd, vincent, and dont die horribly more than once
>in shuttle cockpit talking about pod cloning and how much better it is than normal cloning
>steve leaf, nonantag CE, bluespace crystals me for tresspass
>I get spaced

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 8:45 pm**

>captain
>oh shit there be a cult
>kill a cultist
>snag his pda
>get idea
>grab a lawyer's pda cartridge
>send a very obviously pax-sent message screaming for fellow cult aid to all pdas
>is-a-lizard responds, completely blowing his cover to patronize me
>consider gloating to him over pda that i completely fucking rused him
>nah
>brag in sec channel instead
>he compromised the channel
>counter-brags
>kills me in single combat

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 9:04 pm**

Never brag until the end lad.

>Be me QM
>Golems spawn really near the station
>Decide there's too many non-Humans on my fucking pure station
>Organise a strike between my most loyal subordinates
>Refuse to work until we meet with a representative of the Command staff
>AI offers, I tell him what he is; a soulless automaton and a disgusting non-Human and will be thrown off the station as well
>He leaves
>One of the protesters breaks the windows
>I throw my picket sign at the grille
>Tesla grille shocks us all
>Everyone a part of my strike is dead
I'd be mad if it wasn't so hilarious.

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 9:30 pm**

That's what you get.

The reptilian conspiracy has kept the peace again.

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 9:40 pm**

One of my most unrobust rounds ever.

> Spawn as a roboticist.
> Begin typing "suicide".
> GANG LEADER
> Oh crap, I can't play gang leader for shit.
> Pen the other roboticist, then pen the RnD guy.
> Go to xenobiology and ask if they need help. They say no.
> Break the window.
> Xenobiologist walks towards me in a threatening manner.
> Pen him too. After a while, pen the other xenobiologist.
> Try offering promotions, no one really wants them.
> Ash walkers somehow end up on the station.
> Lure them to science with promises of corpses, then declare that I've lied, but there will be bodies, if they help.
> Pen them too, promote one of them.
> Wild HoS appears, keeps wandering in science and snooping around.
> Buy a stetchkin, summon my other gang members with a gang announcement.
> Miss all of my shots.
> HoS effortlessly runs away through the maint, critting two of us in the process.
> WELP
> Heal our guys.
> Wild warden appears!
> Surround him.
> Try to shoot him.
> End up shooting my gangster.
> Warden tases us all, then harmbatons all of us to death.
> Only my ash walker lieutenant survives by not being in science.
> Our bodies taken to the brig and kept there forever.
> Or maybe not, I fell asleep accidentally.

It's during times like this when I have to remind myself about those two-three nuke ops rounds, when I've managed to carry everything solo, so I won't hang myself out of shame.

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 9:43 pm**

Being robust isn't everything.

There's a lot to be said for being salty.

Posted: **Sat Apr 23, 2016 10:06 pm**

>spawn
>mill around
>GANGSTER
>caught in the life
>hack into the hop's office
>shoot him dead with his own gun
>toss his dead-ass body in disposals
>follow it
>game freezes
>round trip ping-pong took 3.3e16+ seconds

EDIT:

>spawn
>mill about
>GANGSTER
>come the fuck on
>run over to the brig to die ineffectively so i can get back to something else
>one brig window's almost broken; the hos is in plain sight of me
>know what i must do
>grab fire extinguisher
>hit the window until it breaks, provoking the hos
>throw fire extinguisher at the grille when the hos approaches to shoot me
>zap the fuck outta both of us
>i'm a single hit away from death, better not fuck this up
>get the gun before the hos
>shoot her dead
>jack her identity
>holy fuck i can't believe i pulled that off
>make it to medbay
>heal myself
>holy shit
>go to armory to pinch a bunch of guns for my rev buddies
>detective pops up
>yo hos we got gangs
>nod
>stun her
>empty my laser into her
>holy shit i can't believe this is goi-
>detective gets up
>shoots me
>kills me dead
>this comes on my pandora station
[youtube]vBecM3CQVD8[/youtube]

Posted: **Mon Apr 25, 2016 11:43 pm**

>miner
>its a friendly wizard meme round but I Dont give a fuck
>time to kill the legion boss
>doing pretty ok with a legion implant and a super ka
>woops after splitting twice it buttfucks me ow
>vincent comes in with a ripley to give to me and gets fucked up
>he tries to escape
>he sends a split once legion skull up
>it kills the entire station
>5.3% evac rate (counting the wiz, 3 people lived)
>woops

The unloved rock was Is-A-Lizard the Shaft Miner and died
Objective #1: Fuck up everything forever.Success!
The traitor was successful!

Posted: **Mon Apr 25, 2016 11:58 pm**

Holy shit that sounds glorious

Posted: **Tue Apr 26, 2016 1:25 am**

Same round as:

The unloved rock wrote:>miner
>its a friendly wizard meme round but I Dont give a fuck
>time to kill the legion boss
>doing pretty ok with a legion implant and a super ka
>woops after splitting twice it buttfucks me ow
>vincent comes in with a ripley to give to me and gets fucked up
>he tries to escape
>he sends a split once legion skull up
>it kills the entire station
>5.3% evac rate (counting the wiz, 3 people lived)
>woops

The unloved rock was Is-A-Lizard the Shaft Miner and died
Objective #1: Fuck up everything forever.Success!
The traitor was successful!

>Be flower bitch
>Gotta make them there plants ya'll.
>It's a wizard
>Friendly one to boot
>I don't give a shit
>I mutagen bananas
>God damn this is annoying
>I DONT WANT FUCKING MINANAN- Oh... Bluespace bananas!
>I made 2 batches
>Station already started to fall apart
>Assholes screaming about wizard and
>I don't give a shit!
>I went and started slipping people.
>Mostly myself
>They turn into mush a lot
>Well then
>Assholes screaming something about skeletons
>I keep on bluespace slipping
>I'm nearly out
>JESUS WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT
> IT'S SHOOTING SKULLS
>WHAT THE FUCK
>Poor bastard started shooting the skulls
>He dies
>A skull took over his body
>Are you fucking kidding me.jpg
>I took the gun and ran
>The skulls are faster than me
>I'm injured
>I ran past people
>I scream helped me
>I crit
>I ded
>I legion
>No control
>I just wanted to slip people for the lulz

Posted: **Tue Apr 26, 2016 3:40 am**

> Be miner
> Gathering ore, killing monsters, having a blast
> Suddenly ashwalkers
> still injured from fighting a watcher
> Try to run, they catch me and kill me
> Expect to be sacrificed
> They have no idea what they're doing
> They wander around lost for several minutes before getting killed by a goliath

And so everybody was taken out of the round and everybody's fun was ruined. GG Ashwalkers.

Posted: **Tue Apr 26, 2016 12:43 pm**

Jacough wrote:> Be miner
> Gathering ore, killing monsters, having a blast
> Suddenly ashwalkers
> still injured from fighting a watcher
> Try to run, they catch me and kill me
> Expect to be sacrificed
> They have no idea what they're doing
> They wander around lost for several minutes before getting killed by a goliath

And so everybody was taken out of the round and everybody's fun was ruined. GG Ashwalkers.

>Not negotiating with the natives with shiny beads
ISHYGDDT

Posted: **Tue Apr 26, 2016 4:39 pm**

> Be lavaland golem.
> MIne.
> Mine.
> Mine.
> Me and my battle brothers collect enough to set up RnD.
> Do RnD by myself.
> Build a Durand, fully arm it
> Take it for a joyride
> Don't notice a chasm, fall into it and instantly die.

gg

Posted: **Tue Apr 26, 2016 6:35 pm**

Looks like that chasm got the drop on you.

Posted: **Tue Apr 26, 2016 8:25 pm**

shut the fuck up

off yourself

Posted: **Tue Apr 26, 2016 10:21 pm**

>nuke op
>get plan to buy disk using 140 briefcases of cash because thats prolly worth more than the station
>everybody is cooperating including the crew besides a lizard who tries to steal our hardsuit so we shoot him
>except the captain, named Absolute Madman
>locks himself in the ai upload and gives the ai laws to kill us
>he is too dumb to lock the turrets
>eventually set them to lethal
>he was too retarded to secure the disk so we dont get it
>die from shocked doors and hull breaches because the ai is rogue and we chose chameleon gloves and no hardsuits
>did I mention the cap ragequit after dying

Absolute Madman is the definition of a validhunter (also think the last time i was him was on basil so that explains it)
oh by the way he uploaded a "clowns arent human" law

Posted: **Wed Apr 27, 2016 12:09 am**

Absolute monster

Posted: **Wed Apr 27, 2016 12:20 am**

The unloved rock wrote:>nuke op
>get plan to buy disk using 140 briefcases of cash because thats prolly worth more than the station
>everybody is cooperating including the crew besides a lizard who tries to steal our hardsuit so we shoot him
>except the captain, named Absolute Madman
>locks himself in the ai upload and gives the ai laws to kill us
>he is too dumb to lock the turrets
>eventually set them to lethal
>he was too retarded to secure the disk so we dont get it
>die from shocked doors and hull breaches because the ai is rogue and we chose chameleon gloves and no hardsuits
>did I mention the cap ragequit after dying

Absolute Madman is the definition of a validhunter (also think the last time i was him was on basil so that explains it)
oh by the way he uploaded a "clowns arent human" law

Isn't one humaning the AI as a nonantag bannable under the grounds that you have to be a complete fucktard to do it?

Anonmare wrote: >Not negotiating with the natives with shiny beads
ISHYGDDT

That actually would have been interesting. Unfortunately only one ash walker who spawned after those two had died actually tried to do any sort of roleplaying. The first two just wordlessly ran up and instantly started killing me because "huehuehue we antags we do what we want" before absolutely embarrassing themselves by dying to one fucking simple mob.

Posted: **Wed Apr 27, 2016 12:46 am**

tfw you try and table Mekhi on CM

tfw you fail

Edit : He was playing Engineer and had a belt full of ammo and was dragging his toolbelt behind him smh

Posted: **Wed Apr 27, 2016 2:38 am**

>miner
>try out new explorer belt
>Siserith is retarded again
>spaces the third miner immediately
>steal all 3 capsules
>randomly throw them outside
>shove them into lava twice
>somehow they are alive anyhow
>suddenly the third miner shows up, no idea how they lived
>try to kill Siserith after they waste 3 capsules
>they get one incredibly lucky knockdown and I almost die, then the third miner breaks it up
>they are still a piece of shit and get themselves and the third miner trapped by a bluespace capsule
>break them out (trying to kill siserith with gibtonite in the process)
>it fails
>kill tendril
>drops tarot cards
>pick up cards
>get a protector spirit
>it stays on combat mode and tries to punch goliaths to death repeatedly, fucking me up
>have to spam recall and it keeps going after them
>no ghosts to switch to because of repeated crashes so I am stuck with it
>no botanists to pod clone me
>go to the cmo, DR. floorpills
>tell him to scan me and saw me to death, explaining the guardian
>he saws me to death after scanning me
>he basically says to another guy nearby "holy shit that guy had a holopara didnt see that coming not cloning him"
>after the round siserith justifies it because the disarmed a training bomb twice later
that was the most autism I have seen in a long time, 3 dumbest people I have seen in a long time

Posted: **Wed Apr 27, 2016 3:50 am**

>be me
>am just about to table Mekhi on CM
>MEMES THAT CROSS THE BOUNDARIES OF SPACE AND TIM-
>round ends
>fuck

Posted: **Wed Apr 27, 2016 8:12 am**

PKPenguin321 wrote:janitor is the low-key grief job, and when people get mad at you and retaliate for it you can go on the forums and complain because "its muh job"

my job is making sure the 3x3 square of tiles that connects the starboard hallway and the central loop is EXTRA CLEAN by mopping it with water

Posted: **Wed Apr 27, 2016 6:42 pm**

newfren wrote:
PKPenguin321 wrote:janitor is the low-key grief job, and when people get mad at you and retaliate for it you can go on the forums and complain because "its muh job"
my job is making sure the 3x3 square of tiles that connects the starboard hallway and the central loop is EXTRA CLEAN by mopping it with water

And to ensure that people can effectively move across in a timely manner a small amount of industrial grade lubricant should be applied.

Posted: **Thu Apr 28, 2016 5:13 am**

>basil
>space bartender
>set up drinks, adminmemes provide me with a chemmaster
>get a customer from centcomm
>rp having been in that sleeper for centuries
>centcomm guy fabricates obvious lies, there's no xenos, plasma doesn't exist, yadda yadda
>some other woman shows up and keeps to herself
>other centcomm shows up
>space pirate shows up, and is a lizard
>bartender gets shock, but keeps on serving drinks
>syndiecake shows up
>him and the first guy nearly butcher each other
>things are peaceful after that
>everyone's assembled, who's up for another round of-
>Connection died.

Posted: **Fri Apr 29, 2016 3:40 am**

OOC: TehZombehz: Leaving ASAP is a valid tactic for defeating any antagonist type, save blob or rev or the like.

Posted: **Fri Apr 29, 2016 5:09 am**

If I were an admin and the crew were fully capable of fighting but didn't I'd send an ERT to kill whoever called it on the shuttle.

Posted: **Fri Apr 29, 2016 5:58 am**

IIRC if you guys try calling the shuttle during a blob round; I'll recall it, meme on you all with announcements and BSA the next guy to try calling

Posted: **Fri Apr 29, 2016 6:33 am**

ShadowDimentio wrote:If I were an admin and the crew were fully capable of fighting but didn't I'd send an ERT to kill whoever called it on the shuttle.

That's not what ERTs are for, try deaf squids.

Posted: **Fri Apr 29, 2016 3:09 pm**

>latejoin
>oh shit, son, you be a bitchin' traitor! go prevent this ligger from escaping, and d-
>kill this guy got it
>efficiency
>the above line is enough to warrant a post in this thread
>waltz down the hall, already lost
>spacecarp attacking a robutticist
>pretend to help them by dragging them off
>bludgeon them to death with a red toolbox
>pick up the id and take a disposals ride with the corpse
>space that shit
>cruise on down to r&d
>break into xenobio
>give my target a taste of the tide
>space his corpse
>cruising around, feeling pretty awesome for toolboxing all of my victims to death
>spot an axe
>neat
>grab it
>give the corpse a few whacks for the road
>cruise on down to the engine to sabotage it
>plasmaman engineer
>hit him in the face with an axe
>steal his hardsuit
>regular engineer
>hit him in the face with an axe
>oh he's a changeling
>loose control over my movement and get armbladed within an inch of my life
>leave as enemies
>trying to make it to medical before i bleed out
>settle for the medibot halfway down the hall
>oops too late lost too much blood anyways
>caught between life and death
>shuttle gets called; time passes; my murderin' axe gets stolen
>report AN engineer as a changeling
>frank n. stine inexplicably says "NO FUCK YOU I'M NOT A CHANGELING" despite not even being named
>everyone ignores this
>manage to move around, but i lose conciousness quite a bit
>stumble onto the shuttle to escape, alive and intact
>frank's there
>losing conciousness, i make fun of him one last time
>unconcious from blood loss, buckled up
>he walks right next to me
>nobody gives a shit
>shuttle launches
>he inexplicably armblades and kills the shit out of me, seemingly out of spite
>predictably gets murked and spaced
>well fuck
>cmo defibs me
>good luck with that you shit
>miraculously alive!
>holy shit i'm going to win
>round ends
>i was supposed to die a glorious death
>i used no tc

Posted: **Sun May 01, 2016 2:55 am**

>Cluwne
>Ganghead
>Ok this won't end well
>Jab a few people, all is going well
>Slip a doctor and stab them and a officer goes aggro on me
>Slip them and run but lose banana
>Cry
>Scientist is stalking me
>Extremely conspicuous gang leader
>Elude them long enough to buy an UZI
>They corner me in the library
>Start talking
>Nah fam, we're doing this Brooklyn style
>Fill him with lead
>Gang friend shows up
>Clean up the blood nervously after disposing the body in the trash
>Was a gang leader
>Competition status: Whacked
>Suddenly three guards start swarming the location
>Some bitch must have seen us
>Gat down a guard and my friend tazes another as they open maint
>Run out of ammo while beating the guard to death with his baton
>Flashbang by the last guard dunks us
>HoS and detective show up and drag friend away
>Get thrown in perma instead of executed because a borg was watching
>Unfamiliar face is already in there
>Slip and kill them after a struggle
>Now there's nothing left
>Break out of perma and die in space the way god intended
>There were only three gangers left alive at the end of the round
>It was all ogre from the start

Posted: **Sun May 01, 2016 4:22 am**

reminds me of my experiences as gangboss
>be me
>roll for a job but dont get it
>also roll gangboss
>pen 1 or 2 dudes who know jack shit and dont want to be promoted
>go to pen a 2nd or 3rd dude
>"THIS MIND IS ALREADY IN A GANG HAHA FUCK YOU YOU LOSE"
>get dunked by the enemy gangster/by security after the enemy gangster calls for help
>this has happened the last 3 or 4 times i've been gang boss

/tg/Station 13

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