/tg/Station 13

Once I dragged the blood drunk miner to the station, not knowing its a megabeast (it wouldnt attack me for some reason?)

I once drank the slippery foam in the foamy vents outpour event. It was skewium and I took in the maximum amount of units you can take in.

My next half hour wasnt good

When I was learning chemistry, I left a bottle of toxin on the front desk labelled 'magic potion'. Some dude came by and chugged it. I freaked out, told him it was poison, and gave him a pill of anti-toxin.

Unfortunately, the pill was 50u, which was more than enough for overdose. I found his corpse on the way to the shuttle.

the perfect crime

i dont remember the specifics but one round the shuttle was en route and the station was pretty fucked up and there was a high level sentient disease going around named "cringe"

the cure was lipolicide aka weed which was fucking hilarious so i grew a strain of cannibas called uncringe weed with every reagent but lipolicide removed and 100 potency

i didnt know lipolicide did toxin damage if you ran out of food in your system so everybody who ate the uncringe weed trying to cure the cringe died

another round i managed to do the stable pink core + bluespace bag trick to bring two megafauna to the station and i tried to put an ash drake in the security post but i didnt know the pink core only made them nonhostile to whoever held it, and i kicked the drake trying to put it back in the bag

shaps didnt ban me for it because i wrote him fanfic

I built a singularity engine on the BYOS once. Not only did I forget that it was highly radioactive and forget to bring suits for the crew, I also neglected to realize that unlike the tesla, the good lord singuloth does not travel with the shuttle.

Suffice to say, evac ceased to exist when the shuttle departed.

edit: related picture

worth it, thats a baller as shit shuttle

this one time i made the mistake of playing this game "ss13" until i enjoyed it

really nothing funny about it in hindsight

deedubya wrote:I built a singularity engine on the BYOS once. Not only did I forget that it was highly radioactive and forget to bring suits for the crew, I also neglected to realize that unlike the tesla, the good lord singuloth does not travel with the shuttle.

Suffice to say, evac ceased to exist when the shuttle departed.

edit: related picture

It's also a bad idea because the singularity actively pulls everyone repeatedly into the containment field.

I have a clip of this somewhere but, I recently was killing the colossus as a miner. Only when I was about to be done an ash drake walked up and started spewing fire. I get lit on fire and start to panic and try to teleport away with the hiero club. Only for the colossus to break down the walls and teleport up with me. Not one of my finer moments...

Naloac wrote:I have a clip of this somewhere but, I recently was killing the colossus as a miner. Only when I was about to be done an ash drake walked up and started spewing fire. I get lit on fire and start to panic and try to teleport away with the hiero club. Only for the colossus to break down the walls and teleport up with me. Not one of my finer moments...

this has been happening a lot recently and i dont know if i want it to get fixed so people dont get bwoinked for accidentally killing dozens of people or left in as a hilarious round ending fuckup

nianjiilical wrote:

Naloac wrote:I have a clip of this somewhere but, I recently was killing the colossus as a miner. Only when I was about to be done an ash drake walked up and started spewing fire. I get lit on fire and start to panic and try to teleport away with the hiero club. Only for the colossus to break down the walls and teleport up with me. Not one of my finer moments...

this has been happening a lot recently and i dont know if i want it to get fixed so people dont get bwoinked for accidentally killing dozens of people or left in as a hilarious round ending fuckup

Leave it, bwoink people that do it more than once.

CPTANT wrote:It's also a bad idea because the singularity actively pulls everyone repeatedly into the containment field.

Yeah I realized this pretty quickly, and put up windows around the field after reducing the singulo back down to stage 1 temporarily. It's not my screenshot so the work I did on it afterwards(seating, windows, etc) isn't visible(or entirely relevant to the story, still a bad idea)

When I was first starting to play I started on chem because I wanted to make booms and lethal things. I figured out you could put two metamaterial beakers of meth into a single chemical grenade. I made several of these. I had no idea how big the explosion would be but someone shot at me and my great idea of retaliating was to throw grenades. Several hull breaches later the guy still wasnt dead and shot the grenade in my hand on the shuttle killing a fuckload of people. Admins were not happy.

Round had been going for a while, cap got dunked in maint by a lone op who turned on the self destruct. Shuttle wasn’t going to make it in time, I decide to sacrifice myself to save the crew and grab a second bag of holding. Run to the vault just in time to BoH bomb it. Disaster averted. Shuttle arrival time hits 0:00. And stays there. Turns out the game had no clue what to do so everything broke. Admins had to reboot.

Another time I was chief engineer. Set up a quantum pad in the supermatter containment and one next to the protolathe. Proceeded to mass produce stock parts and teleport them into the engine to become irradiated and then produce more power into the grid. Small lagspike when I teleport the parts so I eventually decided I had done plenty and it was time to stop. But then something happened and the engine began to delaminate. That wasn’t the problem though, the problem was the pressure change caused by the delaminating engine gas that moved OVER A THOUSAND STOCK PARTS AT ONCE. Fabric of reality proceeds to begin delaminating. Nanotrasen sends an official over to fire a BSA at the engine but everything is so slow it’s impossible to aim and fire it. Admins had to reboot.

Another round I was your typical roboticist, praising the machine spirits that run the station and making comments towards a microwave that would land me with a sexual harassment complaint had it been a crew member. Just minding my own business when I realize the guy who just walked into robotics had red eyes. Flash and bash, stab and bag. Have a few more conflicts before it becomes clear cult has control over the station. I get a fellow science man to help me with my plan - Dunk the cult by having him get converted while I’m in his backpack with two bags of holding.
Before we can do anything the cult begins to summon Nar’Sie. I try telling everyone to back away so I can BoH bomb it without any innocents dying, but no one listens. I hear the tearing sound and decide “fuck it” and put one bag into the other.
With the entire cult having only a single walk between me and them. The BoH bomb activates, Nar’Sie is summoned, the entire cult becomes constructs and then is eaten by the BoH bomb, and then Nar’Sie herself joins them. Deadchat is going wild, entire cult (including Nar’Sie) aside from like one lucky harvester dead. CentCom announces the fact that an elder god just got Hendersoned out of existence, and then decide to still nuke us for the fun of it.

Nar’Sie is dead

Too many to count if I'm being honest, but only a few of them are actually amusing.

I was playing as the RD on a fairly midpop day on Box, old research scavenger hunt was already done and there was nobody working toxins so I threw together as many max-caps as I had valves for and decided to give them to mining so they could enjoy some explosions for once. Nothing too special, until I heard those magic words on the radio. "Does anyone need an assistant?" You know, that little tagline that used to be on the wiki; let you know someone was straight still-learning-to-use-their-hands new. Immediately got on the radio and summoned them over to the HoP, got them science access, sat them down and explained the job over coffee. Then I gave them a simple task- deliver this wrapped, secure crate over to cargo. No elaboration because nobody needs that bomb pressure. Only trouble is I hadn't bothered to lock the damn thing since I'd originally intended to take it myself and had wrapped it before being distracted by the fun RP.

Poor greyshirt got about halfway across the bridge hallway before the crew descended on those goodies like seagulls and started smacking the crap out of my intern. Instant screams about bombing over the radio. One or two got disassembled on the spot while others went mad pocketing and running in random directions. I barely managed to explain the situation before Security was there with batons on harm, not that it really mattered. It was almost adorable how embarrassed they were to report that they'd been stolen while we're both literally in a cell, but by now I'm just laughing and numbering up the days from the clearly inevitable ban I'm about to catch. Queue the rest of the round as "OHGODI'MGONNALOSEMYJOB" RD and her frazzled assistant running around trying to recover the explosives after the HoS came in and personally threatened to inject us both with lethal chem implants if we didn't. Lucky enough the Clown and a few other people just handed them back, while I think another was detonated out in space for fun. I'd like to believe it was an entertaining experience for somebody's early rounds at least.

one time I misclicked and accidentally made a giant patch of ice through the station

a couple minutes later I discovered it was on all zlevels

this was during a live round

when I was learning singletanks I accidentally maxcapped myself and it caused enough lag to crash my client and the admins made fun of me for literally blowing up my connection

deedubya wrote:I built a singularity engine on the BYOS once. Not only did I forget that it was highly radioactive and forget to bring suits for the crew, I also neglected to realize that unlike the tesla, the good lord singuloth does not travel with the shuttle.

Suffice to say, evac ceased to exist when the shuttle departed.

edit: related picture

if you put reinforced floor there it would have worked and not left the shuttle im pretty sure

yeah the singulo was indoors once upon a time

It'd eat the reinforced floors and might've accidentally released it if it was in the wrong spot at the wrong time.

TIL Lobotomies are a way to permenantly cripple people beyond any kind of treatment