Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

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lumipharon
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Joined: Mon Apr 28, 2014 4:40 am
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by lumipharon » #49671

Bottom post of the previous page:

You can use it to activate runes with number restrictions )like convert or summon nar'sie) if you can get enough co-operative ghosts. It's pretty hilarious summoning nar'sie with the last few cultists manifesting half a dozen ghosts.
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Grazyn
Joined: Tue Nov 04, 2014 11:01 am
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Grazyn » #49713

>admin spawned flu cop
>it's been a 2-hour extended round, ~70 players, they did all the research and have 2 phazons, along with a honk, firefighter and more
>they've already cleared an alien infestation
>dis gun be gud
>we spawn some EMP shit, e-swords and powersink
>the others get all the goodies, I don't get anything except a stechkin and a bulldog
>we enter the station and set up the sink
>as soon as we reach the hallway, the WHOLE TEAM gets horned by a HONK
>honk is shredded by ion rifle
>we reach the captain's room
>captain gets away with handtele, phazon phase in
>EMP nades manage to keep the phazon at bay, some crewmen walk in and get slaughtered
>ion rifle is empty, can't recharge because power sink
>phazon wrecked by nades and EMP flashlights
>we follow the pinpointer, the HoP corner turns into a meatgrinder, crew and borgs alike are mowed down, the other mechs are nowhere to be seen
>3 ops down, 2 to go
>Bulldog is empty, I pick up a combat shotgun
>the 2 of us make our way towards engineering, suddenly a phazon appears and sprays the hall with laser cannon fire
>I dodge, the other guy deflects the beams with his esword
>I shoot the phazon with my combat shotgun, it's nothing more than a peashooter against it
>I eat a laser beam
>we manage to lose the phazon in engine maint
>c4 on the secure storage wall, disk is in there
>we run to solars, I'm on red health now
>can't believe we're gonna make it
>suddenly Phazon
>dodge the lasers, keep shooting at it with shotgun, we're almost in space
>the other guy makes it, I'm ready to stay behind to slow down the mech
>THE DISK IS ON THE GROUND A COUPLE TILES FROM THE PHAZON
>I manage to pick it up, phazon does nothing but backpedaling
>I regroup with the other op and give him the disk since I'm in flashing red health
>we make it back to the shuttle
>I stay there while the guy goes to plant the nuke, escape shuttle is about to dock
>escape shuttle docks, CODE DELTA ENGAGED
>the crew on the radio is freaking out, they are trying to launch early
>the other op comes back, we depart to syndicate space
>crew uses an emag, 10-second launch
>ESCAPE SHUTTLE HAS DEPARTED
>1 SECOND LATER THE NUKE GOES OFF
>crew has escaped the blast but they're going to space gulag for letting the station be destroyed
>OOC explodes with rage, "WE HAD 5 MECHS, AND WE COULDN'T STOP THEM"
>no more flu cops, we deserve the title of Nuke Ops
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Redblaze3000
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Redblaze3000 » #49881

PKPenguin321 wrote:>roundstart cultist
>need to sacrifice the warden and escape with 15 cultists on shuttle
>someone researches and finds all the words stupidly quickly
>make secret room where the ian t-shirt is, bring medibot, close the wall, make teleport rune
>make astral journey rune, coordinate cult activity
>plays like an RTS as I view the world from above telling my troops where to go and what to watch out for
>we get the warden, cries of success over cult comms

later that same round
>on emergency shuttle
>many dead from security raid earlier
>worried we might not have enough converts
>astral journey rune, manifest rune
>astral journey and tell all ghosts to stand on manifest rune if they want to live again
>like 8 ghosts on the manifest rune
>10 seconds to shuttle dock, suddenly I poop out 8ish cultists
>cries of joy and cheering as the dead now live again
>shuttle docks, cult wins
>walk off the rune
>they all disintegrate instantly
>ghost to hear their cries of confusion and rage as they are thrown back into the underworld
>your_tears_are_delicious.jpg
I was nuke op leader. I was so proud when we blew it the fuck up even though I died. We are too robust for the science nerds.
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peoplearestrange
Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2014 12:02 pm
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by peoplearestrange » #50065

RG4 wrote:
Spoiler:
>Be Lawyer
>Doing things of the law and notice we have no HoS
>Idea.jpeg
>Ask HoP to come HoS.
>Says no and ask if we have a warden
>Warden says he doesn't care if I become HoS
>Sweet
>Become the HoS mid a small crisis of miners apparently being cultist
>Order the Chaplin to bless water tanks and all that jazz.
>Brings me back 3 tanks of Holy Water and then the miners come.
>Force feed them water before they're questioned
>Spout of Cultly words and confirmed it cult
>Be a great HoS while deconverting and implanting former Cultist
>Real HoS shows up and says I fired and ends up being a dick to most people but w/e it's cult
>HoP says good job and makes me Security with HoS privs.
>Order the shuttle call due to Badcultist
>Meanwhile Rob appears to try and cause trouble
>Rob hides in space while I consider going out,going on the shuttle or staying
>End up staying to look over my acomplishment
>THE STAFF MANAGED TO STOP THE CULT!
-Escape with 15 cultist (2 escaped)
-Sacrifice Security Officer (Success)
All while being an non-implanted lawyer.
I AM THE LAWYER!
Grazyn wrote:
Spoiler:
>admin spawned flu cop
>it's been a 2-hour extended round, ~70 players, they did all the research and have 2 phazons, along with a honk, firefighter and more
>they've already cleared an alien infestation
>dis gun be gud
>we spawn some EMP shit, e-swords and powersink
>the others get all the goodies, I don't get anything except a stechkin and a bulldog
>we enter the station and set up the sink
>as soon as we reach the hallway, the WHOLE TEAM gets horned by a HONK
>honk is shredded by ion rifle
>we reach the captain's room
>captain gets away with handtele, phazon phase in
>EMP nades manage to keep the phazon at bay, some crewmen walk in and get slaughtered
>ion rifle is empty, can't recharge because power sink
>phazon wrecked by nades and EMP flashlights
>we follow the pinpointer, the HoP corner turns into a meatgrinder, crew and borgs alike are mowed down, the other mechs are nowhere to be seen
>3 ops down, 2 to go
>Bulldog is empty, I pick up a combat shotgun
>the 2 of us make our way towards engineering, suddenly a phazon appears and sprays the hall with laser cannon fire
>I dodge, the other guy deflects the beams with his esword
>I shoot the phazon with my combat shotgun, it's nothing more than a peashooter against it
>I eat a laser beam
>we manage to lose the phazon in engine maint
>c4 on the secure storage wall, disk is in there
>we run to solars, I'm on red health now
>can't believe we're gonna make it
>suddenly Phazon
>dodge the lasers, keep shooting at it with shotgun, we're almost in space
>the other guy makes it, I'm ready to stay behind to slow down the mech
>THE DISK IS ON THE GROUND A COUPLE TILES FROM THE PHAZON
>I manage to pick it up, phazon does nothing but backpedaling
>I regroup with the other op and give him the disk since I'm in flashing red health
>we make it back to the shuttle
>I stay there while the guy goes to plant the nuke, escape shuttle is about to dock
>escape shuttle docks, CODE DELTA ENGAGED
>the crew on the radio is freaking out, they are trying to launch early
>the other op comes back, we depart to syndicate space
>crew uses an emag, 10-second launch
>ESCAPE SHUTTLE HAS DEPARTED
>1 SECOND LATER THE NUKE GOES OFF
>crew has escaped the blast but they're going to space gulag for letting the station be destroyed
>OOC explodes with rage, "WE HAD 5 MECHS, AND WE COULDN'T STOP THEM"
>no more flu cops, we deserve the title of Nuke Ops
Thats a pretty epic. Sounds like a movie *Imagines escape shuttle riding the blast wave*. If only you'd died as you handed him the disk to complete the cliche.
Whatever
Spoiler:
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Scones
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Scones » #50081

That was a pretty hilarious round. I was the HONK pilot.

You guys got carried so goddamn hard by the guy who bought the EMP kit, just saying. Like, literally the entire win was him. The Phazon pilots were rubes who only had Solaris Lasers and thus couldn't deal with double e-swords. Pretty sure I had an AC2 but I'm not sure.

Anyways, I was going to honk n' shoot but I got 1-shot by either the rifle or the emp flashlight, it was sudden as fuck and startled me more than anything
plplplplp WOOOOooo hahahhaha
Cipher3
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Cipher3 » #50145

Nuke ops round
Shuttle coming, nuke ops get the disk.
Everyone gets aboard, WE NEED TO GO NOW.
Shuttle gets early launched by the CMO who had an e-mag. (Bless him)
Two seconds after we leave the nuke detonates.
Spoiler:
Nathanael Greene has made a woman of Bryce Pax!

Valerie Sinnet says, "Nathaniel Greene charged the brig with a fucking HONK."

[Common] Assists-the-Crew hisses, "Walker Quinn s-s-s-ss-stole the HoP's-s-s-ss-s door"

OOC: HotelBravoLima: I literally can't be removed from power.


I demand this ban be lifted right now. ~Bibliodewangus

Erin Wake whispers, "You should ready up on Badger and boink with me..."

"I think you guys are just tired of drinking hitler and now you want diet hitler.
I've got all that great hitler flavor but only half the hitler calories." - Anon3

You seem to be under the mistaken assumption that PR matters. ~MisterPerson

DEAD: Ichigo Momomiya says, "Coravin's just an ass."

Linus Johnson says, "Hey you know I got this game Skyrim last week"
Linus Johnson says, "I have a level 19 ranger and its so fun"
Weston Zadovsky says, "did he just"
Weston Zadovsky says, "fucking hell"

The emergency shuttle has been called. It will arrive in 10 minutes.
Nature of emergency:
Coravin, just Coravin.

Beryl Nyuphoran says, "Fucking get out."
Coravin Vattes asks, "Please?"
Beryl Nyuphoran says, "Please get the fuck outta my lab."
Coravin Vattes exclaims, "Okay!"
[Common] Beryl Nyuphoran {RD} asks, "WHO GAVE CORAVIN ALL ACCESS?"

Lindsay Donk stammers, "L-Luc-ck w-was-s-s s-s-such-h a beaut-tifu p-p-p-pr-r-rom-m q-q-q-queen"

Ty Andrews curls up in a ball on the floor and purrs.

by oranges » Sun Feb 15, 2015 7:15 pm
Get out bluespace, you've not been relevant since you lost the elections

That said, I think there are a shitton of degenerates here and I'd probably gas the lot of you if I had the chance. ~Loonikus


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Fragnostic
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Fragnostic » #50247

Cecily wrote:That was a pretty hilarious round. I was the HONK pilot.
I lost it when about 4 of the Nuke Ops came across you in the hallway and then you used the HONKblaster and put them all on their ass. The double bladed esword, the Ion Rifle, everything dropped to the floor as they started having a HONK seizure.
But seriously, the Ops meta'd the mechs hard because I was a ghost during that retardedly long round and the mechs were already there for the longest. It's no surprise they bought so many EMP kits and the Ion Rifle which Ops rarely ever bring.
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Cheech1297
Joined: Tue Aug 05, 2014 5:11 pm

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Cheech1297 » #51569

>lowpop round on badger
>be assistant
>you are the changeling kill the assistant next to you and steal some armor
>my target kills himself with fire after dragging me around a bit
>stuff his body in a locker borg follows blood trail and finds me with his body
>explain how he didnt want to live anymore and suicided
>he says i should take the body to the morgue so i do as he says
>a few minutes later help him setup the engine during this we become good friends
>finish the engine go to the bar and tell the borg to come meet me
>ask him to let me become captain since there are no heads and i helped with the engine
>he agrees
>become captain
>promote the borg to assistant captain
>do captain things run around aimlessly for a minute since im still new to asteroid station
>at this point ive gotten all my objectives so i go chat with the chef and come up with a great idea
>meetup with my borg bro and promote him to RD and chat for a bit then go to my office
>send message to centcomm saying that our RD has developed a brand new shield generator that can protect stations from nuclear blasts and ask for the nuke code
>they reply approving my nuclear test
>get the nuke from the vault take it to my office
>insert disk and the code 12345
>write a short story dedicated to the borg for letting me become captain
>make an announcement regarding the story and publish the story
>make a second announcement after publishing the story saying farewell and live long and prosper
>activate the nuke brake the window to my office and bail
>alot of what's as the stations explodes

borg was a bro that round chef was a traitor too and had emagged the borg at one point but neither of them shanked me in maint overall 10/10 round
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Steelpoint
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Steelpoint » #51572

The HONK mech dies in a single hit from the Ion Gun, I'll have to test how much damage the other mechs can sustain but I'm sure its more than one.
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RG4
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by RG4 » #51688

Steelpoint wrote:The HONK mech dies in a single hit from the Ion Gun, I'll have to test how much damage the other mechs can sustain but I'm sure its more than one.
Durands take like 4-7, Phazons are probably a lot.
Also:
>Be RD for the first times since ages ago
>Always paranoid over rev or malf
>Thank God command radio says they caught their first Syndiecate
>Research like I always do
>Some guy who explored space came back with goodies
>Get syndie space suit and tool box
>Decon the toolbox and TYRANT board
>Learn I can make ebows from protolathe now
>HoS-Turned captain after orignal Captain became drunk unlocked and authorized me for two ebows
>Random new HoS appears in science as I'm building Phazons
>Additionally learn how to make Phazons
>HoS steals one of them stuns me while building shit for my mech
>Hos continues to stun me and drag me through maint while my hulk buddy takes chase
>Get saved by the Hulk and get back up
>Pull out E-Bow and stun the BadHoS
>Pull out retro laser and dunk him
>Rekt'd
>I still wanna ban his ass for not being an antag either.
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Scones
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Scones » #51893

>observe one round
>operatives on teleport list
>request to be cayenne to provide moral support
>brief conversation with team ASSFUCK
>shot to death by disgruntled operative
>they buy a borg
>another borg
>another borg
>i am reborn as #3
>triple borg
>180 TC spent
>partition jobs
>one will kill ai, other two go with team
>much friendly fire on shuttle with ion rifle
>dock
>bomb telecomms
>there is no ai
>regroup in our team of 5+3
>proceed to flatten all resistance
>get seperated with one operative
>we decide to cripple medbay
>kill medbay and patients
>kill roboticist for his welder
>run out of battery
>go to sat
>delta
>try to get to shuttle
>fuckers left right after delta
>escape the z-level

Cedarbridge was Syndicate Cyborg-896 (survived)
Cheech1297 was Syndicate Cyborg-564 (survived)
Scones was Syndicate Cyborg-290 (survived)
plplplplp WOOOOooo hahahhaha
rockpecker
Joined: Mon Oct 20, 2014 11:43 pm
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by rockpecker » #52241

> traitor shaft miner
> mission: kill some scientist
> start mining, doing my job as usual, get a pretty good haul
> and a gibtonite
> bring it all back and take it over to science, figure I might run into my target
> keep hardsuit on, just in case
> target isn't there
> but another scientist is, and offers me a plasma torch, cool
> doesn't want the gibtonite
> so I take it all back to cargo
> my target is standing there all alone
> plasma torch: apply directly to the forehead
> HOP sees me walking away
> need a diversion
> drop gibtonite, ignite with plasma torch
> oh, so that's what gibtonite does
> run into maint, weld door shut, ditch clothes, acquire gas mask
> shuttle gets called for unrelated reasons
> head over to escape
> escape is on fire, must be Thursday
> double back, go looking for an escape pod
> hey look, it's the HOP
> stun, cuff, drag to brig
> he sticks me in the escape pod with another prisoner, says to lie down
> then he LEAVES
> slip out of cuffs, summon revolver
> HOP and HOS come back
> revolver: apply directly to the forehead
> revolver: apply directly to the forehead
> arriving at Centcomm in a pod with two murdered heads of staff would be awkward
> open door to remove bodies
> pod launches
> get sucked out into space
Remove the AI.
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ThanatosRa
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by ThanatosRa » #52244

rockpecker wrote:> traitor shaft miner
> mission: kill some scientist
> start mining, doing my job as usual, get a pretty good haul
> and a gibtonite
> bring it all back and take it over to science, figure I might run into my target
> keep hardsuit on, just in case
> target isn't there
> but another scientist is, and offers me a plasma torch, cool
> doesn't want the gibtonite
> so I take it all back to cargo
> my target is standing there all alone
> plasma torch: apply directly to the forehead
> HOP sees me walking away
> need a diversion
> drop gibtonite, ignite with plasma torch
> oh, so that's what gibtonite does
> run into maint, weld door shut, ditch clothes, acquire gas mask
> shuttle gets called for unrelated reasons
> head over to escape
> escape is on fire, must be Thursday
> double back, go looking for an escape pod
> hey look, it's the HOP
> stun, cuff, drag to brig
> he sticks me in the escape pod with another prisoner, says to lie down
> then he LEAVES
> slip out of cuffs, summon revolver
> HOP and HOS come back
> revolver: apply directly to the forehead
> revolver: apply directly to the forehead
> arriving at Centcomm in a pod with two murdered heads of staff would be awkward
> open door to remove bodies
> pod launches
> get sucked out into space
Wrong thread my man. Still funny though.
my forum gimmick is that no one knows who i am

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Preamble
Joined: Mon Apr 28, 2014 11:02 am
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Preamble » #52364

ThanatosRa wrote:Wrong thread my man. Still funny though.
How is this the wrong thread?
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Earthykiller127
Joined: Thu Dec 04, 2014 1:34 pm

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Earthykiller127 » #52617

Preamble wrote:
ThanatosRa wrote:Wrong thread my man. Still funny though.
How is this the wrong thread?
This is stories of awesome not the rage thread.
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Xhuis
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Xhuis » #52887

>You are the nuke op
>Having connection issues, disconnecting randomly
>After debating, go on a sorta-stealth plan with a borg and the czar taking out AI and comms
>I have an EMP kit, tools, chameleon jumpsuit, and a voice changer
>Disguised as Randall Flagg, assistant
>Board station
>Detective starts saying crazy shit, and I walk away
>Comms explodes, AI gone
>Ask captain to hide in bridge, he lets me in
>Emag the blast door button and wait
>He makes an announcement about the comms and comes out
>Shoot him, EMP his headset, cablecuff
>Take his ID and go to his office
>Take the disk from his backpack
>"Nothing personal"
>Ride disposals as a lynch mob has formed at the bridge
>Fly back to the shuttle with the only remaining op; the rest have been killed
>Arm nuke and bring disk to shuttle
>CE follows us back and gets shot down by the other op
>Shuttle goes to the Syndicate outpost
>Take one step
>Internet disconnects but we have already succeeded
>Come back in twenty seconds just as the nuke explodes

And that's how I played stealth op with a bad Internet connection.
I'm an ex-coder for /tg/. I made the original versions of clockcult, shadowlings, revenants, His Grace, and other stuff.
I don't play, code, or participate in the community, but I occasionally post dumb stuff in the hut.
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mikecari
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by mikecari » #52957

Xhuis wrote:snip
Haha I was the other op who shot the CE who tried to jack our shuttle. We did some great teamwork even though I almost got caught by shitcurity. You were the real MVP that round.
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cedarbridge
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by cedarbridge » #53630

Cecily wrote: >delta
>try to get to shuttle
>fuckers left right after delta
>escape the z-level

Cedarbridge was Syndicate Cyborg-896 (survived)
Cheech1297 was Syndicate Cyborg-564 (survived)
Scones was Syndicate Cyborg-290 (survived)
Apparently your assault on medbay flushed the captain out of medbay and into me (headed to medbay after geting the ops to stop fucking around assaulting the brig fnr.) I dunked him in the hallway and dragged his ass on the shuttle.
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Earthykiller127
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Earthykiller127 » #53715

Image + Image + Image + Image + Image =
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DonkeyTeeth
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by DonkeyTeeth » #53863

Delicious wrote:>have random name on
>spawn as smoke shaw
I did that once and spawned as Smoke Greene. Another time as Jamal Compton.

Random names can be fun.
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Konstantinos
Joined: Thu Dec 18, 2014 1:00 am

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Konstantinos » #53996

>Be traitor chef
>Have to assassinate some cargo technician
>Spend most of the round making meat bread and spying on the cargo bay
>Cargo techie is wearing cardborg armor so he's pretty easy to spot
>See his corpse getting dragged to the morgue
>Walk down to get it
>Too_easy.jpg
>Suddenly, the singulo appears
>Hallway gets obliterated and I die
>Ghost around for a bit while marveling at the destruction the singulo is wreaking
>The "You are being revived" message appears
>I discover my body didn't get ground up by the singulo and is on the escape shuttle
>A doctor is using a defibrillator on it
>I come back to life and thank the doctor profusely
>Round ends and I technically completed all my objectives and survived

A scummy, indirect victory is better than no victory at all.
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DemonFiren
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by DemonFiren » #54038

Today on Basil, I was made traitor Runtime by our dear old friend, SoS.

Objectives were to remove Tom, Poly and Ian in order to ascend to power. We all know Lamarr's both castrated and caged, so meh about her.
It took me long enough to break out of Medical, honestly. I almost had to smash the window, fortunately my "owner" (read, underling) let me out.
From then on, I convinced an Assistant to break me into the vault - only to learn that on Eff3 Tom is the QM's pet.
Sec got me into cargo. Tom splatted. One down.
The Assistant from earlier catnapped me. I convinced him I was a Syndiecat. We made take-over plots.
He got arrested, I got out and snuck into Engineering along with Proc, whom I picked up along the way.
Poly actually managed to wound me. Stupid pile of feathers was downed fast enough, though.
Getting out again was the real problem. We called over intercoms and Security (from earlier) hacked in, but got doorshocked. Yay for backup exits!
Now we stalked out and observed Ian, waiting for a chance to get inside under the pretense of "discussing the station's future".
Waited until Cappy and the usual all-access rabble cleared out.
Dunked Ian. Hid the body.
Got seen anyway. Ran for it, since the shuttle was already called.
Pinned the blame on the xenos that were starting to sprout and gently caressing everyone (literally, help intent fyes.)
Xeno was not happy and attacked the CMO. Good! One pesky human leader down!
Podded with the station good as ours.

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non-lizard things:
Spoiler:
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Scones
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 2:46 am
Byond Username: Scones
Location: cooler than thou

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Scones » #54048

>AI
>Decide to be a cunt
>demand reasoning and promise of avoidance of harmful modules when HoP demands upload access
>he refuses to give me either
>upload stays bolted
>he gets the nuke
>"ai i will blow the station"
>"human you don't know the code"
>"ill brute force it"
>queqe
>hop trying to brute force nuke while i laugh at him
>its got to be less than 10 minutes into the round
>NAR'SIE HAS RISEN
>what the actual fuck
>priority shuttle 3 minutes
>laughing my ass off in binary
>lone borg beating the shit out of harvesters
>lockdown bridge so hop can brute force the nuke in peace
>still shocked that cult converted that fast
>remind them that they will never breach my fortress
>round ends
>it was a legit fucking 10 minute nar'sie
>official story end was that the hop finally starved to death before getting the code
plplplplp WOOOOooo hahahhaha
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DemonFiren
Joined: Sat Dec 13, 2014 9:15 pm
Byond Username: DemonFiren

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by DemonFiren » #54063

Woulda been hilarious if he managed.
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non-lizard things:
Spoiler:
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Rhisereld
Joined: Wed Jun 11, 2014 7:20 am
Byond Username: Rhisereld

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Rhisereld » #54110

Cecily wrote:>AI
>Decide to be a cunt
>demand reasoning and promise of avoidance of harmful modules when HoP demands upload access
>he refuses to give me either
>upload stays bolted
>he gets the nuke
>"ai i will blow the station"
>"human you don't know the code"
>"ill brute force it"
>queqe
>hop trying to brute force nuke while i laugh at him
>its got to be less than 10 minutes into the round
>NAR'SIE HAS RISEN
>what the actual fuck
>priority shuttle 3 minutes
>laughing my ass off in binary
>lone borg beating the shit out of harvesters
>lockdown bridge so hop can brute force the nuke in peace
>still shocked that cult converted that fast
>remind them that they will never breach my fortress
>round ends
>it was a legit fucking 10 minute nar'sie
>official story end was that the hop finally starved to death before getting the code
>Same round
>Be Chemist
>NAR'SIE HAS RISEN
>What the actual fuck
>Pop 100 units Hyperzine, Synaptizine and Tricord
>Grab circular saw
>Internals on
>Yakety sax, sawing harvesters left and right
>They can't stun me because internals
>Accidentally yakety sax right into Nar'sie's gaping maw.
>Not even mad.
MedicInDisquise
Joined: Tue Jun 03, 2014 12:33 am

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by MedicInDisquise » #54175

>Be mime doing mime shit
>get put on arrest by someone, AI kind enough to let it go 2 times
>Beepsky starts following me around but never arresting me
>B-Beepsky?
>AI tells me I have a new friend
>tears of joy
>we walk around the station, talking
>I <3 Beepsky
>We even eventually get another bot, a medibot, to follow us
>we're best buds, I even make a photo album (http://imgur.com/a/W9l2J)
>flash forward to sometime after the group picture
>me and beepsky alone in the mime's room (clown went and killed himself or never joined, so no clown), and I walk back outside
>beepsky doesn't follow??
>Indeed, beepsky doesn't even move on his patrol route or anything.. he's dead.
>cry
>cry
>cry
>give him a silent funeral, and euology to the admins online (who gave me a cookie)
>goodnight sweet prince
>hatchet myself to death
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Earthykiller127
Joined: Thu Dec 04, 2014 1:34 pm

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Earthykiller127 » #54198

>be CMO latejoin
>20 minute fast forward
>you are tator assassinate the fuckin' lawyer
>pray to get an objective to steal something instead
>steal an ablative armor
>okay
>plan my break into the armory, there aren't alot of people there so it's easy
>hesitate
>decide to instead ask the captain to have a meeting with me
>captain accept, we're now in his office
>tell him about how i am a syndicate agent who never wanted to be one and all that emotional buzz
>give him my pda with tator menu on it to prove it
>i understand.jpg
>fuck. yes.
>gives me ablative armor and confiscated my tator pda, gives me a clean new PDA
>finish my objective, flawless greentext
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Miauw
Joined: Sat Apr 19, 2014 11:23 am
Byond Username: Miauw62

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Miauw » #54220

Earthykiller127 wrote:>be CMO latejoin
>20 minute fast forward
>you are tator assassinate the fuckin' lawyer
>pray to get an objective to steal something instead
>steal an ablative armor
>okay
>plan my break into the armory, there aren't alot of people there so it's easy
>hesitate
>decide to instead ask the captain to have a meeting with me
>captain accept, we're now in his office
>tell him about how i am a syndicate agent who never wanted to be one and all that emotional buzz
>give him my pda with tator menu on it to prove it
>i understand.jpg
>fuck. yes.
>gives me ablative armor and confiscated my tator pda, gives me a clean new PDA
>finish my objective, flawless greentext
Image
>badass icon
>captain didnt order a bunch of shit for research
>captain didnt order a balloon

shamefur dispray
<wb> For one, the spaghetti is killing me. It's everywhere in food code, and makes it harder to clean those up.
<Tobba> I stared into BYOND and it farted
mattroks101
Joined: Mon Dec 01, 2014 10:37 pm
Byond Username: Mattroks101

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by mattroks101 » #54223

>Be HoP
>MD comes up
>Asks for EVA access so that he can save the lives of people in space
>"Sure why not"
>He leaves
>Bunches of lives are saved in space.
>Almost no one who was spaced died.
>Feels good man. Feels good.
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peoplearestrange
Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2014 12:02 pm
Byond Username: Peoplearestrange
Location: UK

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by peoplearestrange » #54295

mattroks101 wrote:>Be HoP
>MD comes up
>Asks for EVA access so that he can save the lives of people in space
>"Sure why not"
>He leaves
>Bunches of lives are saved in space.
>Almost no one who was spaced died.
>Feels good man. Feels good.
Thats... pretty epic really. Plus good job on being a decent HoP to give the MD a chance.
Whatever
Spoiler:
oranges wrote:singulo.io is the center point of rational and calm debate, where much of tg's issues are worked out in a fun and family friendly environment
miggles wrote:it must have been quite the accomplishment, killing a dead butterfly
WeeYakk wrote:If you take a step back from everything watching the community argue janitor related changes is one of the most surreal and hilarious things about this game. Four pages of discussing the merits of there being too much or too little dirt in a video game.
Operative wrote:Vote PAS for headmin! Get cucked and feel good getting cucked.
TheNightingale wrote:I want to get off Mr. Scones's Wild Ride...
NikNakFlak wrote:Excuse you, I was doing intentional bug testing for the well being of the server. I do not make mistakes.
Fragnostic wrote:stop cucking the first shitshow ever that revolved around me.
This is my moment, what are you doing?!
Anonmare wrote:Oranges gestures at the thread, it shudders and begins to move!
Saegrimr wrote:
callanrockslol wrote:all you have to do is ban shitters until the playbase improves/ceases to exist, whichever comes first.
IM TRYING
Screemonster wrote:hellmoo is the mud for grown adults who main reaper in overwatch
Kor wrote:
confused rock wrote:...its like if we made fire extinguishers spawn in emergency boxes and have them heal you when you put out fires rather than them being in wall storages...
Are you having a stroke
bandit wrote:you are now manually GLORFing
MrStonedOne wrote:The best part about the election is when I announce my pick because I'm just as surprised as everybody else.
PM:[USER]->IrishWristWatch0: Yeah, im make it on but how im make the station to to sun and not go to sun

OOC: Francinum: Five Rounds at PAS's
"You are destinied to defeat Dr. Uguu and his 5 Robot Masters
(All-Access-Man, ShootyBlackCoat Man, ChloralHydrate Man, Singulo Man and TeleportArmor Man)"
I'm a box
mattroks101
Joined: Mon Dec 01, 2014 10:37 pm
Byond Username: Mattroks101

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by mattroks101 » #54670

peoplearestrange wrote:
mattroks101 wrote:>Be HoP
>MD comes up
>Asks for EVA access so that he can save the lives of people in space
>"Sure why not"
>He leaves
>Bunches of lives are saved in space.
>Almost no one who was spaced died.
>Feels good man. Feels good.
Thats... pretty epic really. Plus good job on being a decent HoP to give the MD a chance.
Yeah, it was him and I think another MD came up later with the same thing. They were the space medical squad, I think that's what they called themselves. It was a really epic round, they did a good job saving people in space.
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Scones
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 2:46 am
Byond Username: Scones
Location: cooler than thou

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Scones » #54691

>go to Badger because sticky says there will be an event thing
>play MD
>enjoyable round start
>mixing cultures in viro
>get my crates
>get called down by the other MD's pAI
>we have a patient!
>patient claims to have a ton of weird symptoms
>sedate him when he starts stripping and yelling
>go to make more sedative
>other md screaming OH GOD
>he fucking exploded
>we go about our business
>dave comes back
>what the fuck
>we talk to him more, hes buckled to bed
>warden is involved now
>chair mysteriously vanishes
>me and other md tripping out
>lights flickering
>warden finally fucks off with our pai
>dave is released
>warden starts claiming dave isn't real
>oh god its happening
>other md warns of a cover-up
>arm up as medbay does
>rapid-fire syringe gun from the rd (HE KNOWS THE TRUTH)
>hide on mining and tell miner and rd that dave is real
>we have to stop dave from doing whatever it is hes doing
>6 chloral syringes
>lube spray
>its time
>security looking for us
>long process to break into craptain's office for his spare
>centcomm must know the truth
>spare id is gone
>run into dave in maint
>"Ellie, it's just our hallucinogen testing program, here's your bonus!"
>DAVE IS LYING
>DAVE IS ALWAYS LYING
>give him the sleepy juice
>jack his all-access
>centcomm announcements start rolling in
>Get the MDs, they are insane and need corrective operations done
>THE COVER-UP, MAN
>get space suits
>break in through permabrig windows
>loot armory
>have low-intensity firefights
>dave assuming full control of station, bolting doors
>miner who knows the truth is shooting
>fuck you miner
>miner betrayed us
>last thing i hear before death
>"I want her ALIVE."
>cloned
>sedated
>wake up handcuffed to surgery table
>
>dave standing over me
>Hello, Ellie.
>dramatic conversation ensues
>he has the alium
Dave says, "Well on my little trip I decided on a little experiment"
Dave says, "I found a fascinating specimen on that asteroid"
Ellie Leach says, "...No."
Dave says, "Centcom would love to see the results."
Ellie Leach says, "NO."
Dave says, "Let me just"
Ellie Leach says, "DAVE."
Dave says, "Lower"
Dave says, "My"
Dave says, "Mask"
Ellie Leach says, "YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS"
Dave (as Unknown) says, "Oh ellie"
Dave (as Unknown) says, "You left me no choice"
>facehugged
>cry and accept death
>explode in general testing
>rd knows the truth, tries to free me right as i burst
>respawned as death squad
>station must be cleared
>The truth never left the station.

Objective #1: THE CONSPIRACY IT'S ALL TRUE IT'S ALL LIES DAVE HAS TRICKED THEM ALL STOP DAVE KILL DAVE THEY ARE ALL WRONG ALL OF THEM OH GOD EVERYONE IS OUT TO GET YOU FIND DAVE KILL DAVE STOP THE MADNESS KILL DAVE
Fucking great event.
plplplplp WOOOOooo hahahhaha
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peoplearestrange
Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2014 12:02 pm
Byond Username: Peoplearestrange
Location: UK

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by peoplearestrange » #54797

Cecily wrote:
Spoiler:
>go to Badger because sticky says there will be an event thing
>play MD
>enjoyable round start
>mixing cultures in viro
>get my crates
>get called down by the other MD's pAI
>we have a patient!
>patient claims to have a ton of weird symptoms
>sedate him when he starts stripping and yelling
>go to make more sedative
>other md screaming OH GOD
>he fucking exploded
>we go about our business
>dave comes back
>what the fuck
>we talk to him more, hes buckled to bed
>warden is involved now
>chair mysteriously vanishes
>me and other md tripping out
>lights flickering
>warden finally fucks off with our pai
>dave is released
>warden starts claiming dave isn't real
>oh god its happening
>other md warns of a cover-up
>arm up as medbay does
>rapid-fire syringe gun from the rd (HE KNOWS THE TRUTH)
>hide on mining and tell miner and rd that dave is real
>we have to stop dave from doing whatever it is hes doing
>6 chloral syringes
>lube spray
>its time
>security looking for us
>long process to break into craptain's office for his spare
>centcomm must know the truth
>spare id is gone
>run into dave in maint
>"Ellie, it's just our hallucinogen testing program, here's your bonus!"
>DAVE IS LYING
>DAVE IS ALWAYS LYING
>give him the sleepy juice
>jack his all-access
>centcomm announcements start rolling in
>Get the MDs, they are insane and need corrective operations done
>THE COVER-UP, MAN
>get space suits
>break in through permabrig windows
>loot armory
>have low-intensity firefights
>dave assuming full control of station, bolting doors
>miner who knows the truth is shooting
>fuck you miner
>miner betrayed us
>last thing i hear before death
>"I want her ALIVE."
>cloned
>sedated
>wake up handcuffed to surgery table
>
>dave standing over me
>Hello, Ellie.
>dramatic conversation ensues
>he has the alium
Dave says, "Well on my little trip I decided on a little experiment"
Dave says, "I found a fascinating specimen on that asteroid"
Ellie Leach says, "...No."
Dave says, "Centcom would love to see the results."
Ellie Leach says, "NO."
Dave says, "Let me just"
Ellie Leach says, "DAVE."
Dave says, "Lower"
Dave says, "My"
Dave says, "Mask"
Ellie Leach says, "YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS"
Dave (as Unknown) says, "Oh ellie"
Dave (as Unknown) says, "You left me no choice"
>facehugged
>cry and accept death
>explode in general testing
>rd knows the truth, tries to free me right as i burst
>respawned as death squad
>station must be cleared
>The truth never left the station.

Objective #1: THE CONSPIRACY IT'S ALL TRUE IT'S ALL LIES DAVE HAS TRICKED THEM ALL STOP DAVE KILL DAVE THEY ARE ALL WRONG ALL OF THEM OH GOD EVERYONE IS OUT TO GET YOU FIND DAVE KILL DAVE STOP THE MADNESS KILL DAVE
Fucking great event.
Ha! Wow, that round sounds amazing.
Will Dave ever be stopped!?!?
Whatever
Spoiler:
oranges wrote:singulo.io is the center point of rational and calm debate, where much of tg's issues are worked out in a fun and family friendly environment
miggles wrote:it must have been quite the accomplishment, killing a dead butterfly
WeeYakk wrote:If you take a step back from everything watching the community argue janitor related changes is one of the most surreal and hilarious things about this game. Four pages of discussing the merits of there being too much or too little dirt in a video game.
Operative wrote:Vote PAS for headmin! Get cucked and feel good getting cucked.
TheNightingale wrote:I want to get off Mr. Scones's Wild Ride...
NikNakFlak wrote:Excuse you, I was doing intentional bug testing for the well being of the server. I do not make mistakes.
Fragnostic wrote:stop cucking the first shitshow ever that revolved around me.
This is my moment, what are you doing?!
Anonmare wrote:Oranges gestures at the thread, it shudders and begins to move!
Saegrimr wrote:
callanrockslol wrote:all you have to do is ban shitters until the playbase improves/ceases to exist, whichever comes first.
IM TRYING
Screemonster wrote:hellmoo is the mud for grown adults who main reaper in overwatch
Kor wrote:
confused rock wrote:...its like if we made fire extinguishers spawn in emergency boxes and have them heal you when you put out fires rather than them being in wall storages...
Are you having a stroke
bandit wrote:you are now manually GLORFing
MrStonedOne wrote:The best part about the election is when I announce my pick because I'm just as surprised as everybody else.
PM:[USER]->IrishWristWatch0: Yeah, im make it on but how im make the station to to sun and not go to sun

OOC: Francinum: Five Rounds at PAS's
"You are destinied to defeat Dr. Uguu and his 5 Robot Masters
(All-Access-Man, ShootyBlackCoat Man, ChloralHydrate Man, Singulo Man and TeleportArmor Man)"
I'm a box
Kot
Joined: Thu Jun 19, 2014 7:27 pm
Byond Username: KotMroku
Location: Mexico Of Europe

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Kot » #54815

I harmbatoned him when his deathsquad left for a while but nope, he had active defense and i just exploded while he only lost his hearing for a while.
So nope.
An0n3 wrote:ARGH LETS YIFF MATEY
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Shores Of Hazeron
1999-2014
;_;7
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Fragnostic
Joined: Mon May 19, 2014 2:11 am
Byond Username: Fragnostic

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Fragnostic » #55527

>be me
>crossing my finger for sec officer
>lolnope greyshirt tator
>assasinate HoS
>put on a disguise and ID I plucked off a braindead and go scope out the HoS in the brig
>HoS is always on his feet, never lets you get close/too busy to chat
>dash to tool storage and pick up a toolbox, some signallers, and a signaller cartridge
>dash to dorms to assemble my kill device
>order C4, syndicate bomb, smuggler's satchel and an emag(just in case)
>go to janitors closet and try to get a mousetrap
>seemed empty so I try to fake wall inside
>just got a girder down when janitor comes inside
>he's a total bro who simply says "sup" when he sees me
>dash to bathrooms and assemble a mousetrap and signaller assembly
>attach signaller to C4, spawn my bomb and crowbar out the payload and arm the mousetrap
>shove payload, C4, and mousetrap-signaller into my smugglers satchel
>scope out brig again as myself this time and try to find a good place to plant it
>HoS is busy listening to piano and violin duet performing outside brig
>slink out of his view and crowbar a tile outside brig doors, plant bag and cover it
>stay in the courtroom waiting for HoS to use the door
>he never does, uses only the doors through the gulag shuttle
>panic the fuck out, assume he knows everything, go collect the bag and change tactic
>scour arrivals and find Zoey Webb's braindead body, remember I have an emag that is useless to me
>the plot thickens
>plant smuggler satchel bomb inside Zoey's backpack
>keep emag on me
>run to brig and tell HoS that Zoey is a traitor, tell him that she has an ema
>after much yelling, he finally came out, suspiciously
>show him emag and they take it
>they go and use the detective scanner on it from the detectives office
>they take it and my PDAS which I left on the signaller system
>I assume my plan is fucked
>he belittles my attempts at treachery and lets me go, leaving me embarrassed
>I continue to insist he search Zoey, insisting she has more syndicate technology
>yell over radio to let me keep any syndie loot anyone finds on Zoey
>HoS sweeps Zoey's cuffed body and drags it detective's office
>ohshit.jpg
>come back and see ripped up floor tile from EVA all the way to Law Office
>see detective's office is kill with gibs along epicenter of blast
>aww yis
>dick around until shuttle call
>come back to make sure, literally no one cared/noticed, breach is unpatched for most of round
>get on shuttle, avoid the massive shuttle grief
>greentext
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Vigilare
Joined: Mon Dec 01, 2014 11:05 pm

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Vigilare » #56593

> be warden
> nobody's being arrested, nothing's happening
> polish laser rifle with damp rag
> suddenly, bomb in bridge maint
> timer at 20 seconds
> get bomb suit on, sanic-speed run through bridge (all-access says hi)
> screwdriver open bomb at 15
> 14
> fumble with bag and clunky interface
> 13
> get out internals box
> 12
> recover wirecutters
> 11
> 10
> cut the first wire
> bomb defused
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Erbbu
Joined: Tue Oct 28, 2014 4:56 am
Byond Username: Erbbu

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Erbbu » #56602

I doubt the bomb suit would even have saved you from being gibbed. Anything close enough to a bomb will get disintegrated no matter how armored it is.
Vigilare
Joined: Mon Dec 01, 2014 11:05 pm

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Vigilare » #56615

Erbbu wrote:I doubt the bomb suit would even have saved you from being gibbed. Anything close enough to a bomb will get disintegrated no matter how armored it is.
I heard bomb suits have 100% bomb protection - the bomb suit gets disintegrated, but you're otherwise unharmed
is this not a thing any more

(either way, it would've ruined my emulsions should I go disarming bombs in a winter coat and beret)

I kept the disarmed bomb (minus payload) in my office for the rest of the round. great souvenir.
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bandit
Joined: Thu Apr 17, 2014 7:35 pm
Byond Username: Bgobandit

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by bandit » #56648

>Cultist, sacrifice officer, summon nar-nar
>Sacrifice a suicide, he's still there, get an arty out of it, hide the arty in a maint falsewall cubbyhole and get shells going
>Participate in sacrifices, make teleportation networks in out-of-the-way places, give my tome to a new recruit because I've made runes
>Everything seems to be going OK
>Suddenly, one certain construct I can't mention again because an admin complained decides to go leeroy and get the cult found out
>Security is robust and starts bringing people in
>I manage to get a sec radio key off the clown but people chase me before I can do anything useful with the clunwe so all it does is give me a running update on how fucked we are
>Finally get caught by security mid-teleportation
>Someone (non-cultist) lets me go before I get holy water down the throat
>Shuttle's called, officers after me
>Fuck this I'm hiding
>Notice there's an away mission
>Ragequit into the gateway
>IT'S ONE FUCKING WAY
>Half the away mission is on fire
>I'm a roundstart cultist so I have no way of cult-communicating, and radio doesn't work here
>:honkman: :salt:
>This away mission has an elevator but it doesn't work, so I just chill in the elevator with the one other person there, a lizard miner
>Arr pee a bit with the lizard, tell him of our failed cult, convince him that Narsieism is not a real cult after all but a legitimate religion
>The lizard agrees to sacrifice his soul to the cult, I pickaxe him to death, open the elevator door, prepare to pray or some shit
>Greeted by fellow cultist with a tome
>Sacrifice the lizard and fulfill his Narsieism for real
>Cultists and non-cultists start to trickle in one by one, convert the ones who are friendly and sac the ones who are being shit
>Eventually we get 9 people
>NARSIE AT THE AWAY MISSION
>Fail our objectives in practice... but not in spirit!
"I don't see any difference between ERP and rape." -- erro

admin feedback pls
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DemonFiren
Joined: Sat Dec 13, 2014 9:15 pm
Byond Username: DemonFiren

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by DemonFiren » #56666

That's GREENTEXT YOU DESERVED.
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non-lizard things:
Spoiler:
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iRazgriz
Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2015 9:40 am

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by iRazgriz » #57174

> QM, non Traitor.
> Time to run cargo.
> Order gloves and toolbelts.
> CT comes to me.
> "QM can I emag the computer in your office?"
> "Da."
> Computer is emagged, no issues.
> Clown joins the Cargo team, fuck no not the clown.
> Give my ID to the CT, take his ID and go hunt crates while he orders stuff.
> "Sergey just jumped in the gibber"
> MFW I really didn't wtf is going on.
> Go back to cargo, only the clown there. He ordered a box of specops stuff and one of random syndie gear.
> HoP comes in, sees and goes away.
> I take a parapen and some EMPs.
> CT comes back, in pyjama and no ID
> Give him back the ID, secborg runs in and he runs away.
> Now where the fuck is MY ID.
> Get new one from HoP.
> 5 seconds later "Sergey we found your ID".
> Back to cargo.
> HoP built cloner, ID machine, Centcomm Computer and something else in the storage.
> Clown shows me a crate with 2 emags, syndiesoap, space suits, a power sink and a revolver.
> HoP knew already.
> What the fuck is going on.
> We are free to use the ID machine in cargo, get all access.
> Some time passes.
> Go for a stroll, see borg beating to death and dragging the CT to the gibber.
> Stopyoucheekycunt law 2.
> Go clone him, nothing to do.
> Borg said he saw me jumping in the gibber.
> Confus.
> Back to cargo, clown being a real bro and stuff, so is the HoP.
> AI board missing, we bunker cargo and cut the cameras.
> Order guns.
> Declare Cargonia independence.
> Cargo gets welderbombed, bomber is beaten to death.
> I have no idea on what's happening, I am not sure how far can I extend with killing people and I hate doing that anyway.
> Still order 8 crates of guns and armor.
> HoP has discussion with Centcomm about stuff, they mention a "Loyalty team" on the way.
> Tough shit, Cargo is an armory.
> Some people join Cargo. We are 5 in total.
> Comms down, borgs rogue.
> What.jpg
> Go cut cameras in hallway, meet 2 secborgs.
> "Are you cargonia?"
> Fuck that, run away dodging the lasers (thank you ablative armor)
> Back to cargo, people are armed for war.
> Clown informs me that borgs are allied to Cargonia.
> Shuttle is coming soon, try to find borgs to tell them that I am indeed cargonian.
> Find dead people around.
> Drag an engineer to Cargo, clone. He joins cargo.
> Run to shuttle, we are 4 cargonians there plus 2 guys.
> CMO and Captain run in guns blazing, both die.
> Shuttle leaves.
> Shuttle docks and Death Squids storm in.
> Survive by hiding in the Sleeper.
> Clown was Traitor all along.
> Cargo strong.

Incredibly confusing round. But really fun too.
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peoplearestrange
Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2014 12:02 pm
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by peoplearestrange » #57222

iRazgriz wrote:
Spoiler:
> QM, non Traitor.
> Time to run cargo.
> Order gloves and toolbelts.
> CT comes to me.
> "QM can I emag the computer in your office?"
> "Da."
> Computer is emagged, no issues.
> Clown joins the Cargo team, fuck no not the clown.
> Give my ID to the CT, take his ID and go hunt crates while he orders stuff.
> "Sergey just jumped in the gibber"
> MFW I really didn't wtf is going on.
> Go back to cargo, only the clown there. He ordered a box of specops stuff and one of random syndie gear.
> HoP comes in, sees and goes away.
> I take a parapen and some EMPs.
> CT comes back, in pyjama and no ID
> Give him back the ID, secborg runs in and he runs away.
> Now where the fuck is MY ID.
> Get new one from HoP.
> 5 seconds later "Sergey we found your ID".
> Back to cargo.
> HoP built cloner, ID machine, Centcomm Computer and something else in the storage.
> Clown shows me a crate with 2 emags, syndiesoap, space suits, a power sink and a revolver.
> HoP knew already.
> What the fuck is going on.
> We are free to use the ID machine in cargo, get all access.
> Some time passes.
> Go for a stroll, see borg beating to death and dragging the CT to the gibber.
> Stopyoucheekycunt law 2.
> Go clone him, nothing to do.
> Borg said he saw me jumping in the gibber.
> Confus.
> Back to cargo, clown being a real bro and stuff, so is the HoP.
> AI board missing, we bunker cargo and cut the cameras.
> Order guns.
> Declare Cargonia independence.
> Cargo gets welderbombed, bomber is beaten to death.
> I have no idea on what's happening, I am not sure how far can I extend with killing people and I hate doing that anyway.
> Still order 8 crates of guns and armor.
> HoP has discussion with Centcomm about stuff, they mention a "Loyalty team" on the way.
> Tough shit, Cargo is an armory.
> Some people join Cargo. We are 5 in total.
> Comms down, borgs rogue.
> What.jpg
> Go cut cameras in hallway, meet 2 secborgs.
> "Are you cargonia?"
> Fuck that, run away dodging the lasers (thank you ablative armor)
> Back to cargo, people are armed for war.
> Clown informs me that borgs are allied to Cargonia.
> Shuttle is coming soon, try to find borgs to tell them that I am indeed cargonian.
> Find dead people around.
> Drag an engineer to Cargo, clone. He joins cargo.
> Run to shuttle, we are 4 cargonians there plus 2 guys.
> CMO and Captain run in guns blazing, both die.
> Shuttle leaves.
> Shuttle docks and Death Squids storm in.
> Survive by hiding in the Sleeper.
> Clown was Traitor all along.
> Cargo strong.

Incredibly confusing round. But really fun too.
That was one of the most WTF rounds I've played as well. I was the CE and spent most of the round utterly confused. Specially when I headed to cargo to find a wall blocking half the corridor.
Whatever
Spoiler:
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Joined: Mon Dec 01, 2014 10:37 pm
Byond Username: Mattroks101

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by mattroks101 » #57235

>Be double agent Bartender, tasked with killing Virologist
>"oh no i don't get shit access what am I supposed to do?"
>Devise plan of just breaking into virology and murdering him in cold blood, and praying I don't get caught
>Order a shit load of syndie items that I probably don't need but make me feel better about my suicide mission
>Just about to go and do the deed when the captain announces
>"Come see the execution of the traitor virologist"
>wut no way
>Go and see, sure enough, the virologist I was supposed to kill is executed. I didn't have to do anything.
>Now I have syndie items though, and I can't get rid of them.
>Janitor comes and throws an acid bomb at me, everything I own and half the bar is melted
>Chef saw, he comes and drags me to cloning
>He clones me
>Janitor is arrested and executed for murder.
>Spend the rest of the round, trying to get stuff back and hanging out with the CE
>Double agent was successful.

I'm not sure if I should mad I didn't actually get to do anything, or just really impressed that I didn't actually have to do anything. Either way, still a fun round, the CE was a bro the whole time.
iRazgriz
Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2015 9:40 am

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by iRazgriz » #57249

peoplearestrange wrote:
iRazgriz wrote:
Spoiler:
> QM, non Traitor.
> Time to run cargo.
> Order gloves and toolbelts.
> CT comes to me.
> "QM can I emag the computer in your office?"
> "Da."
> Computer is emagged, no issues.
> Clown joins the Cargo team, fuck no not the clown.
> Give my ID to the CT, take his ID and go hunt crates while he orders stuff.
> "Sergey just jumped in the gibber"
> MFW I really didn't wtf is going on.
> Go back to cargo, only the clown there. He ordered a box of specops stuff and one of random syndie gear.
> HoP comes in, sees and goes away.
> I take a parapen and some EMPs.
> CT comes back, in pyjama and no ID
> Give him back the ID, secborg runs in and he runs away.
> Now where the fuck is MY ID.
> Get new one from HoP.
> 5 seconds later "Sergey we found your ID".
> Back to cargo.
> HoP built cloner, ID machine, Centcomm Computer and something else in the storage.
> Clown shows me a crate with 2 emags, syndiesoap, space suits, a power sink and a revolver.
> HoP knew already.
> What the fuck is going on.
> We are free to use the ID machine in cargo, get all access.
> Some time passes.
> Go for a stroll, see borg beating to death and dragging the CT to the gibber.
> Stopyoucheekycunt law 2.
> Go clone him, nothing to do.
> Borg said he saw me jumping in the gibber.
> Confus.
> Back to cargo, clown being a real bro and stuff, so is the HoP.
> AI board missing, we bunker cargo and cut the cameras.
> Order guns.
> Declare Cargonia independence.
> Cargo gets welderbombed, bomber is beaten to death.
> I have no idea on what's happening, I am not sure how far can I extend with killing people and I hate doing that anyway.
> Still order 8 crates of guns and armor.
> HoP has discussion with Centcomm about stuff, they mention a "Loyalty team" on the way.
> Tough shit, Cargo is an armory.
> Some people join Cargo. We are 5 in total.
> Comms down, borgs rogue.
> What.jpg
> Go cut cameras in hallway, meet 2 secborgs.
> "Are you cargonia?"
> Fuck that, run away dodging the lasers (thank you ablative armor)
> Back to cargo, people are armed for war.
> Clown informs me that borgs are allied to Cargonia.
> Shuttle is coming soon, try to find borgs to tell them that I am indeed cargonian.
> Find dead people around.
> Drag an engineer to Cargo, clone. He joins cargo.
> Run to shuttle, we are 4 cargonians there plus 2 guys.
> CMO and Captain run in guns blazing, both die.
> Shuttle leaves.
> Shuttle docks and Death Squids storm in.
> Survive by hiding in the Sleeper.
> Clown was Traitor all along.
> Cargo strong.

Incredibly confusing round. But really fun too.
That was one of the most WTF rounds I've played as well. I was the CE and spent most of the round utterly confused. Specially when I headed to cargo to find a wall blocking half the corridor.
The HoP got creative.
We got remotely lockable doors, fake walls and all that.
I am surprised noone got banned.
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Scones
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 2:46 am
Byond Username: Scones
Location: cooler than thou

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Scones » #57570

>CMO
>Decent population for Badger
>Only one other Medical staff
>Configure Cryo
>Dick around a bit
>Go braindead in my bathroom
>Come back
>I'm set to arrest
>Captain screeching about how I'm wanted
>A ton of other people are set to wanted
>Go to Library and talk to small group of assistants
>Agree the Captain's a dick
>Beepsky picks me up and I am brought to Security
>Searched
>"A traitor had your spare coat sorry"
>mfw I checked and spare coat is still in my locked locker
>Go back to the greyshirts
>They agree to support me if I should become Captain
>Messy coup attempt with stunprods
>Captain stripped but gets saxxed out
>Regroup with remaining revs
>Pray and become an actual traitor
>Captain literally right outside our hideout arresting someone
>Go out and baton him, drag him screaming through maint
>"HEAD OF SECUIRRTTTTYYY CMO ROGUEEEEEE"
>HOS hot in pursuit
>taser shot goes off
>oh fuck I'm down
>here come the cuffs
>HE TOUCHES A POWER CABLE TRYING TO CUFF ME
>as thousands of volts of hotwired solar electricity course through his veins he begins convulsing while the skin beneath his noninsulated glove blackens from the energy
>laugh and drag captain to maint bathrooms
>choke him to death there
>HOS agrees i can become captain
>get dressed up and arm my old revolutionary army
>medals all 'round
>HOS just sort of awkwardly standing around me and a bunch of greyshirts with eguns
>central command congratulates me

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Sticky was the Captain and died like a true condom, screaming at the top of him lungs while getting spam knocked down
plplplplp WOOOOooo hahahhaha
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Xhuis
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by Xhuis » #57699

>assistant
>do normal assistant things
>some lawyer starts calling for the formation of a pro-human worker union
>join
>learn door wires, people keep joining the Human Worker's Union (HWU)
>lawyer office is repurposed into the headquarters of the HWU
>clown gives me a red space suit
>write an appeal and distribute copies of it across the station
>nobody listens
>gather all the members of the HWU, salute, and jump out the mass driver
>slap on the red space suit and land on the telecomms satellite
>get centcomm uniform, NVG, and oxygen jetpack
>teleport back
>"You hear a buzzing in your ears."
>i am no longer human
>leave the HWU with a heavy heart
>Centcom update: "An artifact related to the knowledge of the universe has appeared on-station. Get it for us."
>look around for it
>captain finds it
>it's the greentext
>shove him and take it
>shitlord with a stimulant virus sanicbatons me and steals the greentext
>become depressed and walk back through the teleporter
>land at an abandoned one but survive the space because i have the healing virus
>repair teleporter but it won't work
>pray "I tried. The teleporter doesn't work. Bring me home."
>You hear a voice in your head... THIS
>WILL
>HURT
>wait a minute, nothing happens
>WALL FUCKING EXPLODES
>I AM FLUNG THROUGH THE WALL AT TERMINAL VELOCITY IN A RANDOM DIRECTION
>CATAPULT PAST MINING AND FLY THROUGH SPACE, BEING DRAGGED AROUND BY AN UNSEEN FORCE
>SLAM INTO THE CRASHED CLOWN SHUTTLE AND GO INTO CRIT
>TAKE A FINAL FLING INTO THE DERELICT BEFORE DYING OF SPACE

what a fucking way to die
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Joined: Sun Dec 28, 2014 11:47 am
Byond Username: Donkey_teef

Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by DonkeyTeeth » #57705

Xhuis wrote:
Spoiler:
>assistant
>do normal assistant things
>some lawyer starts calling for the formation of a pro-human worker union
>join
>learn door wires, people keep joining the Human Worker's Union (HWU)
>lawyer office is repurposed into the headquarters of the HWU
>clown gives me a red space suit
>write an appeal and distribute copies of it across the station
>nobody listens
>gather all the members of the HWU, salute, and jump out the mass driver
>slap on the red space suit and land on the telecomms satellite
>get centcomm uniform, NVG, and oxygen jetpack
>teleport back
>"You hear a buzzing in your ears."
>i am no longer human
>leave the HWU with a heavy heart
>Centcom update: "An artifact related to the knowledge of the universe has appeared on-station. Get it for us."
>look around for it
>captain finds it
>it's the greentext
>shove him and take it
>shitlord with a stimulant virus sanicbatons me and steals the greentext
>become depressed and walk back through the teleporter
>land at an abandoned one but survive the space because i have the healing virus
>repair teleporter but it won't work
>pray "I tried. The teleporter doesn't work. Bring me home."
>You hear a voice in your head... THIS
>WILL
>HURT
>wait a minute, nothing happens
>WALL FUCKING EXPLODES
>I AM FLUNG THROUGH THE WALL AT TERMINAL VELOCITY IN A RANDOM DIRECTION
>CATAPULT PAST MINING AND FLY THROUGH SPACE, BEING DRAGGED AROUND BY AN UNSEEN FORCE
>SLAM INTO THE CRASHED CLOWN SHUTTLE AND GO INTO CRIT
>TAKE A FINAL FLING INTO THE DERELICT BEFORE DYING OF SPACE

what a fucking way to die
I was the mime in that round. I kept seeing your papers everywhere and hearing you guys on the radio, but I couldn't find you! I was also busy in a petty grudge with the shitler CMO.
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by 420weedscopes » #57975

>engie
>set up singulo, ce retires and fucks off
>get shouted at by a new ce for setting it up wrong when everything is fine
>regular engineer round continues
>suddenly called to the brig to repair greyshirt damage
>it's just a broken window
>cut the grille, get out my glass, taking my time since the station is all good
>three sec officers watching
>one decides i am not working fast enough
>stun, pulled into sec's inner hallway and stripped naked
>hos (who requested the repairs) starts shouting at the sec officer
>sec officer tries to defend himself
>hear over the engineer radio
>SINGULOOSE
>it's announced on the public channel
>nobody in security knows
>stand there putting my shit back on and listening to these two bicker
>screen shakes (an explosion)
>i can see the singulo in the hallway below
>seem to be the only one who noticed
>wait thirty seconds
>"hey guys do you perhaps want to investigate that explosion"
>SUDDENLY MASSIVE HALLWAY DESTRUCTION
>everybody runs into the sec pod
>hos fires sec officer
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bandit
Joined: Thu Apr 17, 2014 7:35 pm
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by bandit » #58032

420weedscopes wrote:>engie
>set up singulo, ce retires and fucks off
>get shouted at by a new ce for setting it up wrong when everything is fine
>regular engineer round continues
>suddenly called to the brig to repair greyshirt damage
>it's just a broken window
>cut the grille, get out my glass, taking my time since the station is all good
>three sec officers watching
>one decides i am not working fast enough
>stun, pulled into sec's inner hallway and stripped naked
>hos (who requested the repairs) starts shouting at the sec officer
>sec officer tries to defend himself
>hear over the engineer radio
>SINGULOOSE
>it's announced on the public channel
>nobody in security knows
>stand there putting my shit back on and listening to these two bicker
>screen shakes (an explosion)
>i can see the singulo in the hallway below
>seem to be the only one who noticed
>wait thirty seconds
>"hey guys do you perhaps want to investigate that explosion"
>SUDDENLY MASSIVE HALLWAY DESTRUCTION
>everybody runs into the sec pod
>hos fires sec officer
actually the screen shaking was gravity going out, but regardless that officer was shit
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danno
Joined: Wed Apr 16, 2014 5:07 pm
Byond Username: Dannno
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Re: Stories of Awesome (Or something close to it.)

Post by danno » #58071

>play mechanic
>fixing the breath
>police man com
>he beat me
>i bleending
Hornygranny wrote: wtf i like danno now
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I don't even play ss13 anymore, pretty much due to dannos stupid bullshit
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