/tg/Station 13

Bottom post of the previous page:

I actually for the life of me can't remember which server that was on.
Might've been Bay.

Lovecraft wrote:This is a non-/tg/ story, to preface this.
>Start off as Head of Personnel, August Finster
>Traitor! Assassinate the Captain!
>Captain roleplays as an extremely old man, says he's bedridden and sick
>Has us hold a staff meeting around his bed as the CMO treats his imaginary disease (fatal but slow acting)
>Through wheezes and coughs explains that I'll be leading the charge while he commands in between naps
>I dismiss the heads except for the RD, who slipped some keywords during our meeting
>Agree to kill the other heads so long as he provides me an AI upload
>Work the good old Finster charm on each character, have a lowlit dinner with each before shooting them with my revolver
>Have the bodies dumped by some assistants whom I pay, and get the upload
>Standard insurance lawset, hail Finster, only do this simply to have the AI under my control
>Invite the RD for wine and victory steak, stab him with my parapen as we clink glasses
>The Captain, who was getting worse without his Medical aid, becones me in
>Wash up and attend his bedside, after saving some rounds for him
>"August...the time has come...come closer...."
>lean in
>"Closer...."
>lean in
>"August...I...thought you were smarter..."
>He rises and stabs me with a parapen
>Walks into the bathroom, walks out bald and in a new Cencom Uniform
>Cuffs me and explains as I wake how he's an undercover Centcom agent investigating my corruption
>Pieces together my murders
>Suddenly both eaten by Singulo
My only regret was not being able to finish the fucking round, it was 10/10 to that point.

i am actually having the most difficult time imagining that roleplay of this depth actually happened

they should've banned the singularity holy shit

It's all about just finding the right people I guess.
I've actually got some pretty great roleplay stories, if I think of any that made me angry I'll come here.

Braindude wrote:

420goslingboy69 wrote:

IcePacks wrote: Words

pax that was a really good story to read high and i want you to know

you really really don't need to act like a cool kid by proclaiming you're high every time you are

fuck

Uhh, Yah ya do.

Kavaweed

>start game
>you are not the traitor
>whatever i'll break into places
>padding
>more padding
>armory
>steal guns, load shotgun and cock it just to make that awesome noise and put it back
>padding
>padding
>you are the assistant in the engine shooting saiga
>check engine for sabotage
>whoops
>force-feed saiga donk pockets to padding
>lum shows up with ward robertson; attempts to melt my face; melts half of the room instead
>padding
>admin: pray for fun
>pray "hi
>YOU ARE THE TRAITOR
>KILL THAT HOP
>i already have a sec hardsuit and shit
>launch myself into space because eh
>land on derelict
>get the teleporters up and running
>find the head of personnel, mabelle "cat lady" wilkerson on bridge making inane announcements about lol5cat
>kill her with the captain's gun (i had that too)
>get caught
>padding
>sex change
>noob hos
>get released with a new gender and a new identity
>flush myself down disposals
>there's another guy in there
>flush us both through the trash
>okay what to do with HOLY SHIT THE GRINDER'S EMAGGED
>narrowly avoid getting all my skin flensed like mr. unlucky assistant
>remark to lum about how asshole-ish that is (lum established herself as a traitor about an hour prior but nobody gave a fuck)
>lum shows up
>shoot her with the energy gun the dumbfuck head of security left me with
>toss her in her own infernal death machine
>but not before she calls for help
>shantae "give pax a sex change" bitchface shows up
>my gun is empty
>disarm her like a total badass
>shoot her with her own gun
>toss her in lum's infernal death machine
>DOUBLE KILL.
>cat lady shows up
>kill her
>TRIPLE KILL!
>clown shows up
>ineffectively tries to slip me
>pick up his soap like the terminator while i stride after him
>toss his ass in there too for kicks
>DOMINATING!
>how do you like crossgender not-pax now bitches
>padding
>go down to the brig to give shantae a sex change
>give shantae a sex change
>open up my pda to make some bombs to force a shuttle call
>my uplink is the pda i stole from saiga
>padding
>die to the evil back-up clone of lum

pls

probably two one where i requested a ban and "hah a nope"

>be hop not traitor
>rename a botanist "Tommy Pickles" on his id
>he flips shit and doesnt even use his id and immediately tries to kill me
>dont even give a fuck
>decide to add "A baby's gotta do what a baby's gotta do" as a joke law
>get arrested, not mad because that's valid
>in jail for like 10 full minutes but whatever, yelling shitcurity at first until gimmie dat headset because 10 minutes
>when i get out i ask lum for a flash and shes like ok
>"u better go fix dat id or i'm gonna kill u"
>reply "you arent robust enough faggot"
>LUM RUNS OUT WITH GUN SET TO KILL AND TRIES TO KILL THE SHIT OUT OF ME
>i fire a damage her with kill by accident, change to stun and i stun and cuff her
>alfred waltzes in roflmaoing, a clown in the back witnessed it and vouches that lum attacked for no reason
>alfred doesnt give a shit and he stuns me and lets lum do whatever
>she beats the shit out of me until i suicide

second story that i dont think im going to fnr

>be traitor rd
>dont remember objective, but i end up being arrested before i even try
>basically danny was abusing ai and making ai let him do whatever and captain wouldn't stop him
>make ai prioritize laws based on rank
>add another law that lists off the ranks so people can't just tell the ai that they're captain so they get top priority
>ai even says into the comms "I'm not going to obey this law"
>you cant do that
>all borgs and everyone want to lynch me for this? why? why? why? why? well i'm arrested
>since the ai was technically being rogue i had reason to ask the borg to not arrest me and they don't give a fuck
>i ask captain to execute me and they say no

OKAY HOLD UP, JUST WANNA SAY IF YOU'RE CAPTAIN AND DENY EXECUTION REQUEST, FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU ESPECIALLY BECAUSE I KNOW FOR A FACT I HAD BEEN 100% NICE WHILE ARRESTED AND DIDN'T KILL ANYONE YET I JUST WANTED TO BE EXECUTED

>captain says to hos they can perma or borg me but NOT execute me
>i ask to be borged so ok
>this whole time there's been an engi borg who's been a fucking shitler the whole game, calling me an idiot, etc
>roboticist takes me, asks me what i wanna be named, i say Lolita because my human name is Dolores Haze and it makes sense
>they're super friendly, they brain me and everything
>the fucking borg walks in and starts beating me with a fire extinguisher nonstop and when i ask it to stop it says "brains arent human"
>roboticist joins in and wont stop either
>roboticist puts me in body and names me Shitdick Assfuck
>i space myself against ai's laws because fuck you ai, you weren't even malf

>latejoin
>ur da traitr i want rd telearmor!!!!
>danny went on a rampage
>show up just in time to watch him get smoked by yoshmaster (as the rd)
>feel an unusual compulsion to help danny
>ignore it and move on
>go grab a toolbelt and stock of tools
>start hacking doors to r&d
>lucky guess on a wire hooray
>bust into yoshmaster's office
>he walks past, slapping danny's dead body with a stick
>feel a strange compulsion to help danny again
>ignore it but try to lure yoshmaster in his office so i don't have to waste an emag
>get an idea
>find yoshmaster in robotics, borging danny
>perfect
>shoot yosh dead as he unlocks the locker for me(?)
>danny's brain: yo bryce you gotta help me
>stuff danny's brain back in his corpse; remove reese's brain
>take danny's corpse to genetics, where i get to see how he's murdered half the crew
>poor, wretched, genetically deficient head of security asks me if i'm blind
>shoot him dead
>start danny's cloning process
>go back to robotics; finish borging reese
>remember i left danny defenseless
>luck over the radio: yo i dyin in genetics
>oops
>head to genetics with reese robotte, murdermachine in tow
>arrive just in time to watch danny pull a johnny gat on luck
>take luck's corpse back to robotics; order reese to defend
>start borging luck
>order reese to call that shuttle
>finish creating L.U.C.K. Auto Fellator
>assign them both to murder dudes in escape
>move to a pod because danny says he has to esape alone
>singularity got close to the pod but it should be servicable
>go grab a drink
>come back
>ded

fuck

IcePacks wrote: >shantae "give pax a sex change" bitchface shows up
>my gun is empty
>disarm her like a total badass
>shoot her with her own gun
>toss her in lum's infernal death machine
>DOUBLE KILL.
...
>go down to the brig to give shantae a sex change
>give shantae a sex change

yeah this story checks out.

Preamble wrote:

IcePacks wrote: >shantae "give pax a sex change" bitchface shows up
>my gun is empty
>disarm her like a total badass
>shoot her with her own gun
>toss her in lum's infernal death machine
>DOUBLE KILL.
...
>go down to the brig to give shantae a sex change
>give shantae a sex change

yeah this story checks out.

i could've mentioned i spaced her newly-penis-having corpse but i didn't

allura wrote: >this whole time there's been an engi borg who's been a fucking shitler the whole game, calling me an idiot, etc
>roboticist takes me, asks me what i wanna be named, i say Lolita because my human name is Dolores Haze and it makes sense
>they're super friendly, they brain me and everything
>the fucking borg walks in and starts beating me with a fire extinguisher nonstop and when i ask it to stop it says "brains arent human"
>roboticist joins in and wont stop either
>roboticist puts me in body and names me Shitdick Assfuck

Wow that was a pretty dickish Borg right there... Not excusing your earlier behaviour though.
Still I would say a brain is still a Human Brain therefore human. Only not human once shoved in a borg.

peoplearestrange wrote:

allura wrote: >this whole time there's been an engi borg who's been a fucking shitler the whole game, calling me an idiot, etc
>roboticist takes me, asks me what i wanna be named, i say Lolita because my human name is Dolores Haze and it makes sense
>they're super friendly, they brain me and everything
>the fucking borg walks in and starts beating me with a fire extinguisher nonstop and when i ask it to stop it says "brains arent human"
>roboticist joins in and wont stop either
>roboticist puts me in body and names me Shitdick Assfuck

Wow that was a pretty dickish Borg right there... Not excusing your earlier behaviour though.
Still I would say a brain is still a Human Brain therefore human. Only not human once shoved in a borg.

A human brain isn't a human, its a brain, in an MMI its a brain that can communicate, its basically incapable of being harmed from a game standpoint without applying acid/bombs/singularity/oven to it.

By that logic a brainburger becomes a human because it is a brain between some bread.

What would a changeling brain?

peoplearestrange wrote:

allura wrote: >this whole time there's been an engi borg who's been a fucking shitler the whole game, calling me an idiot, etc
>roboticist takes me, asks me what i wanna be named, i say Lolita because my human name is Dolores Haze and it makes sense
>they're super friendly, they brain me and everything
>the fucking borg walks in and starts beating me with a fire extinguisher nonstop and when i ask it to stop it says "brains arent human"
>roboticist joins in and wont stop either
>roboticist puts me in body and names me Shitdick Assfuck

Wow that was a pretty dickish Borg right there... Not excusing your earlier behaviour though.
Still I would say a brain is still a Human Brain therefore human. Only not human once shoved in a borg.

i dont see what was wrong with my behavior
people are abusing ai and shit so i enact two laws that let heads stop shitty assistants or whatever using ai
ai disobeys me and i get arrested

>yer a traitor
>kill a cargo tech
>you know what this means pax
>it's time
>to do that thing
>catch cargo tech leaving cargo
>kill him
>assume his identity with a voicechanger
>order as many MULEs as physically possible
>hack them all
>loose them on the station
>order more MULEs for a total of nine
>send them all over the station
>blob
>get greedy
>ded

EDIT:

>assistant
>somebody hacked an air alarm to set it to choke people
>ask for a scanner that nobody's using to find out who
>no answer; thrown out of detective's office (the head of personnel was going in there for fun laughs)
>try to hack in, take it
>shot, thrown out
>ask the warden one final time if he can give me the damn forensic scanner
>break into the armory, take it via force, lock up the warden with no radio so he doesn't harass me for doing his actual job for him
>find out in the process that he's been sitting on both a forensic scanner and a full string of fucking pda messages with the goddamn captain-killing traitormime
>bloink
>cyclical argument with niknak
>i giffin u 2 howr ben 4 his 15 minoot captififty 4 arristin him 4 his jeb

i'm glad to see being a dumbfuck constitutes as his job

">find out in the process that he's been sitting on both a forensic scanner and a full string of fucking pda messages with the goddamn captain-killing traitormime"

was his name Sloan Strange

because

Sloan Strange Cups Vixen's booty-

our eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!
BANG
Your eyes start to burn badly!
Your ears start to ring badly!

>miss endgame banter

ice post more stories they make my day

>Join an scientist
>No RD, goto HoP desk to become RD
>Become RD and being to glorius time of research
>Man comes in with E-BOW and E-Sword
>Kills me and stuffs me in a locker.
>Pure saddness as I wait in a locker
>Nearly an hour later the locker opens!
>TEARS OF JOY
>Get cloned
>Suddenly I hear glass breaking
>And the cloning pod is pulled.
>Lord Singloth the 5th(level 5 Sing) passes by.
>Get gibbed
>Can't even be mad

I've just experienced ONE OF THE FUCKING WORST Rounds I EVER had.

> Spawn Scientist
> Outside the game want to find music for the station.
> Ling-antag takes the opportunity to kill me in the first 10 seconds of the game
> Be dead... amazingly not spaced, stuffed in a locker instead.
> Someone finds me, get dragged to Genetics
> Be cloned
> Connection closed...
> Reconnect
> Don't have the name of the ling who killed me anymore
> Pop out of cloning, braindamage, shortsighted
> Have to BEG FOR PROPABLY FIVE MINUTES TO GET A FUCKING CLEAN SE from the Geneticist
> Geneticist seems to have NO IDEA what I'm even talking about
> Have to ask the CMO to make me a fucking clean SE
> Finally get clean SE, shortsight is cure, braindamage remains, great!
> Stand in front of chemistry for propbably a good FUCKING TEN MINUTES trying to get their fucking attention
> Be ignored all the way
> Some Assistant wants me to put into Cryo, but I don't want to because I need chemistry
> Get into Chemistry while door is open, want to make medicine myself
> FUCKING OTHER CHEMIST PUNCHES ME INTO CRIT
> Stuffs me into Cryo where I stay pretty long...
> Chemist gets me out and throws me into disposals before I'm even awake
> Stand propably ANOTHER TEN FUCKING MINUTES IN CARGO ASKING FOR SOMEONE TO HELP AND LET ME OUT
> Finally some Cargo guy comes in and KILLS ME WITH A FUCKING FLAMETHROWER
> Get dragged to medbay where some guy thinks it's a good idea to cuff-buckle me to a chair
> At least the CMO notices how I'm dead and puts me into morgue
> Rest of the shift the green light silently illuminates the room... a player waiting to be cloned, having the name of the ling who murdered him.

I can't even describe this incompetence and shitlordery of this round... It's like, you can scream our lungs out trying to get help but nobody will help you, even in fucking medbay.

dionysus24779 wrote:(...)
> Don't have the name of the ling who killed me anymore
(...)
> Rest of the shift the green light silently illuminates the room... a player waiting to be cloned, having the name of the ling who murdered him.
(...)

?

Kot wrote:

dionysus24779 wrote:(...)
> Don't have the name of the ling who killed me anymore
(...)
> Rest of the shift the green light silently illuminates the room... a player waiting to be cloned, having the name of the ling who murdered him.
(...)

?

Yes, you're right I forgot to mention that, I managed to get someone to lend me their PDA to look up the proper name of the ling. (my own PDA was stolen of course.)

dionysus24779 wrote:

Kot wrote:

dionysus24779 wrote:(...)
> Don't have the name of the ling who killed me anymore
(...)
> Rest of the shift the green light silently illuminates the room... a player waiting to be cloned, having the name of the ling who murdered him.
(...)

?

Yes, you're right I forgot to mention that, I managed to get someone to lend me their PDA to look up the proper name of the ling. (my own PDA was stolen of course.)

That whole story is basically why I stopped playing CMO and why I started playing almost exclusively borgs. Meatbags a shit.

>artyom
>20-ish players
>go round start captain
>gear up, get my shit in captains office
>go to setup the engine with help of Miriam
>"captain to hop!!!"
>go to hop, get parapenned and c4'd right away, 5 minutes into the game by Kato
>he gets guns and sets up a c4 on himself
>goes around killing everyone on the station
>shuttle called by AI
>Kato then blows up
>turns out, he gave himself a 20 min timer on the c4 on himself

id put it in awesome, but it was more of a "why" type round. why murderbone with barely a skeleton crew. *shrug*

>humans suck
>so let's become their slaves

worst wiz round:

>Roll something I don't want
>Fuck this, suicide
>Leave the house to get some coffee
>Come back, check spessmen
>Wizard's... den?
>I'M A FUCKING WIZARD
>An apprentice, technically
>Look back on chat, real wiz chewed me out and left
>I've got magic missile and fireball
>Teleport in
>Run into the wizard dressed as an assistant at arrivals security
>"KILL THE ROBOTICIST."
>fine whatever
>Mosey over to robotics
>Roboticist there
>Take advantage of the fact that I am human, ask the AI to let me in
>It does for some reason
>Make small talk with the roboticist, a secborg and an officer
>Miraculously none of them validhunt me
>But also don't leave
>Roboticist mentions he's going to go off and get some tools
>See my chance: magic missile, fireball, sax out
>Drag him to arrivals checkpoint, everyone in the fucking world on my tail
>Try to space him but get tazed and spaced and ded
>feck
>Roboticist gets taken to cloning and doesn't clone
>suicide mission, feels good man
>Round ends
>I KILLED THE WRONG FUCKING ROBOTICIST

bandit wrote: >Roll something I don't want
>Fuck this, suicide

fuck you

>assistant
>time to prank someone!
>hey chemist! let's prank someone!
>okay! i'll get some lube!
>no, lube is too boring, and everyone hates getting pranked by lube more than they hate getting pranked!
>okay, then i'll make a cocktail of toxic shit and you can shoot it at someone and bring them to medbay!
>hmmm... i could get banned for that! let's do it!
>accidentally splash it on an epi-pen
>get a refill
>shoot it at someone
>it just happens to be the most spiteful jerk on the station
>SUCCUMB+AHELP FUCK YOU
>admins: that was fucking stupid
>me: i agree
>ban

there's a lesson to be learned here but i lost it in the ridiculously intense, steely rage the recipient exhibited

IcePacks wrote: >admins: that was fucking stupid
>me: i agree
>ban

I wonder who has a bigger notes section you or me
I've had mine's sized used against me before

Lovecraft wrote:

IcePacks wrote: >admins: that was fucking stupid
>me: i agree
>ban

I wonder who has a bigger notes section you or me
I've had mine's sized used against me before

Even the most well behaved players will have a wall of notes to be used against them after a year or so. Notes never get cleared.

Most often people's notes are less cluttered than they think. Perhaps three to seven lines for a few years.
I can't think of any non-griffons (or mostly innocent jokers) in excess of low double-digits; even then it's usually just "IC/OOC in OOC/IC" and such.
Also 99% sure IcePacks wins that bet.

notes did get cleared, if you're going from server 1 to server 2, server 2 to badger, badger to basil, and then basil to artyom

>spawn as MD
>don my usual gear
>setup cryo
>botanist broke into chemistry
>"im a chemist :^)"
>examine him, no he is not
>spam all the walls outside of chemistry
>bottom left wall is a false wall
>manage to disarm push him and then table him
>take his botanist id
>starts toolboxing me over it
>run to medbay, comms are down so i can't call for help
>keep getting toolboxed till I extinguish him back a few times
>ko's me in one lucky hit, RNG hated me that time
>proceeds to crit me and then drags me to escape
>md saves me
>md decides to, while im in crit, steal my backpack and everything in my pocket to search for botanist id
>finally revives me only to put me in a straightjacket
>drags me to sec instead of listening to me
>detective thinks i deserved crit
>finally convince them to let me go
>the wizard has failed!

my entire round.

i regret giving that botanist a chance.

Swagile wrote:>spawn as MD
>don my usual gear
>setup cryo
>botanist broke into chemistry
>"im a chemist :^)"
>examine him, no he is not
>spam all the walls outside of chemistry
>bottom left wall is a false wall
>manage to disarm push him and then table him
>take his botanist id
>starts toolboxing me over it
>run to medbay, comms are down so i can't call for help
>keep getting toolboxed till I extinguish him back a few times
>ko's me in one lucky hit, RNG hated me that time
>proceeds to crit me and then drags me to escape
>md saves me
>md decides to, while im in crit, steal my backpack and everything in my pocket to search for botanist id
>finally revives me only to put me in a straightjacket
>drags me to sec instead of listening to me
>detective thinks i deserved crit
>finally convince them to let me go
>the wizard has failed!

my entire round.

i regret giving that botanist a chance.

Call the security next time.
Lesson learned?

Wesdo wrote:

Swagile wrote:>spawn as MD
>don my usual gear
>setup cryo
>botanist broke into chemistry
>"im a chemist :^)"
>examine him, no he is not
>spam all the walls outside of chemistry
>bottom left wall is a false wall
>manage to disarm push him and then table him
>take his botanist id
>starts toolboxing me over it
>run to medbay, comms are down so i can't call for help
>keep getting toolboxed till I extinguish him back a few times
>ko's me in one lucky hit, RNG hated me that time
>proceeds to crit me and then drags me to escape
>md saves me
>md decides to, while im in crit, steal my backpack and everything in my pocket to search for botanist id
>finally revives me only to put me in a straightjacket
>drags me to sec instead of listening to me
>detective thinks i deserved crit
>finally convince them to let me go
>the wizard has failed!

my entire round.

i regret giving that botanist a chance.

Call the security next time.
Lesson learned?

>run to medbay, comms are down so i can't call for help

read first please.

1) find a station intercomm
2) type :i HELP
3) slap yourself; that was dumb
4) type :i HELP (LOCATION HERE)
5) hit enter

alternatively just switch that sucker on

It was a busy day so I only had the chance to play 2 rounds from like 0:30 to 2:00 or whatever, so I was sacrificing sleep to play a bit of spessman...

First round:

> Latejoin
> Walk to Robotics
> Get debrained...
> Robo goes braindead...
> Be stuck on table out of sight for like 15 minutes...
> Eventually HoP shows up, I get borged
> No AI or other borgs, nobody able to tell me what the fuck is going on





> Be Borg
> Be Secborg
> Get abused by Assistants with silly Law 2 Orders
> Finally get called away to be backup
> Traitor has flash and esword, kills me
> Get dragged back to Robotics
...
> Wait...
> Wait some more...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Eventually Roboticist borgs someone else first...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Eventually Roboticist goes braindead...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Eventually RD borgs someone else first...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Eventually RD builds a Mech...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> WAIT...
> WAIT.............
> AFTER OVER 40 FUCKING MINUTES I'M FED UP AND WRITE AN A-HELP ABOUT IT... and no I'm not exaggerating, I wish I was...
> Get no answer... of fucking course... 3 Admins on...
> WAIT....
> WAIT...
> Wait...
> WRITE ANOTHER FUCKING AHELP
> OF FUCKKKKKIIIINNNNGGGGGGGGG COURSE NO ANSWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> Waiting for nearly an hour by now for the RD or someone to take the 10 seconds it would take to revive me...
> WAIT FUCKING MORE
> WAIT MORE
> WAIT MORE
> WRITE THE FUCK FUCKERY FUCKING THIRD AHELP
> Finally get an answer about how it's "discussed how to bring me back"... 70 minutes at this point, but who's seriously counting anymore. Also funny how I can think of a dozen ways instantly to bring me back... like... bringing me back.
> WAIT MORE...
> WAIT MORE...
> After over an hour I finally do get revived, and instantly emagged.
> So sad RD is braindead by now
> Master orders me to help sec subdue some prisoners that riot... dunno why...
> By this point it's like 2:03 in my country and I'm sleepy and sloppy and reveal my laser by accident
> Get promptly killed sadly...
> Eventually get revived again tho.
> Eventually get killed again because I'm fucking tired and borgs have such exploitable weaknesses.
> Just... way too tired to even care anymore.

At least I got to have some antag action, though waiting for over an hour to get revived when your borg body sits in the Roboticist office with Roboticists and RD fucking around giving everything a higher priority then taking a few seconds to print the damn board, weld the shell a bit and plug it in?... if I had a say here I would jobban these people.

dionysus24779 wrote:snip

I don't know what it is but the recent crop of roboticists have been really really terrible. Like, "Imma go fight the wizard in MY RIPLEY" terrible. If I had an antag token for every time a roboticist stabbed me with a screw driver to change my battery at roundstart, I'd never be a non-antag again.

cedarbridge wrote:

dionysus24779 wrote:snip

I don't know what it is but the recent crop of roboticists have been really really terrible. Like, "Imma go fight the wizard in MY RIPLEY" terrible. If I had an antag token for every time a roboticist stabbed me with a screw driver to change my battery at roundstart, I'd never be a non-antag again.

This is true, I dunno if we have like an influx of new players I'm not aware of or something, but competence seems to be at an all time low.

Some Roboticists don't know how to debrain, some seem to be really old players used to the old scapel, saw, scapel method, others still try to stab MMIs and borg shells with pens to name them, then they often forget anyway causing you to have to get a reclassification boar, which ALWAYS fails the first time changing your name to "default cyborg" so you have to get a second one, because no Roboticist knows how to actually use these things or they forget. (Of course I can bring up my favourite pet peeve again, that this wouldn't be an issue if borgs could just name themselves, but I'm ranting about that for nearly 2 years now.)

Sometimes I would love to see players go through some kind of tutorial in order to unlock a job, just to show they know what the fuck they're doing and supposed to do.

>On Artyom
>Been enjoying some p'cool rounds
>Round about to end, population is dying down now
>OOC suddenly goes active
>OOC: C4g: okay i just spent a couple hours making this and i already regret it http://i.imgur.com/gtxB8Me.jpg
>Open up link and it's heretical nsfw xenos
>Innocence dead, close artyom, vow to never go on it again
>>OOC: C4g: also its cross eyed 3d so you can make it come out of the screen at you
>>>OOC: C4g: for realism
>>>>>>Post here
>>>>>>>>>>>>>I now have nightmares about people in xenosuits erping in the dorms while playing ss13
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>sjw artyom erp serber

looping wrote:>On Artyom
>Been enjoying some p'cool rounds
>Round about to end, population is dying down now
>OOC suddenly goes active
>OOC: C4g: okay i just spent a couple hours making this and i already regret it http://i.imgur.com/gtxB8Me.jpg
>Open up link and it's heretical nsfw xenos
>Innocence dead, close artyom, vow to never go on it again
>>OOC: C4g: also its cross eyed 3d so you can make it come out of the screen at you
>>>OOC: C4g: for realism
>>>>>>Post here
>>>>>>>>>>>>>I now have nightmares about people in xenosuits erping in the dorms while playing ss13
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>sjw artyom erp serber

You call that NSFW? Huehuehuehuehue

>Clown Wise Guy is clowning around
>Confront him
>He makes penis jokes at me
>Tell him it's not funny because faulty cloning caused my genitals to shrink
>He puts a hand on my shoulder and a foot up my balls.
>He proceeds to harass security and me constantly during the round
>After much mocking on his side and tears from my side he gets shocked by a grille and is in critical.
>Go to help him, maybe then he'll stop making jokes and accept me for who I am.
>He quickly speaks his last words to me "lmao warden has no penis"
>Cry

dionysus24779 wrote:It was a busy day so I only had the chance to play 2 rounds from like 0:30 to 2:00 or whatever, so I was sacrificing sleep to play a bit of spessman...

First round:

> Latejoin
> Walk to Robotics
> Get debrained...
> Robo goes braindead...
> Be stuck on table out of sight for like 15 minutes...
> Eventually HoP shows up, I get borged
> No AI or other borgs, nobody able to tell me what the fuck is going on





> Be Borg
> Be Secborg
> Get abused by Assistants with silly Law 2 Orders
> Finally get called away to be backup
> Traitor has flash and esword, kills me
> Get dragged back to Robotics
...
> Wait...
> Wait some more...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Eventually Roboticist borgs someone else first...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Eventually Roboticist goes braindead...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Eventually RD borgs someone else first...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Eventually RD builds a Mech...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> Wait...
> WAIT...
> WAIT.............
> AFTER OVER 40 FUCKING MINUTES I'M FED UP AND WRITE AN A-HELP ABOUT IT... and no I'm not exaggerating, I wish I was...
> Get no answer... of fucking course... 3 Admins on...
> WAIT....
> WAIT...
> Wait...
> WRITE ANOTHER FUCKING AHELP
> OF FUCKKKKKIIIINNNNGGGGGGGGG COURSE NO ANSWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> Waiting for nearly an hour by now for the RD or someone to take the 10 seconds it would take to revive me...
> WAIT FUCKING MORE
> WAIT MORE
> WAIT MORE
> WRITE THE FUCK FUCKERY FUCKING THIRD AHELP
> Finally get an answer about how it's "discussed how to bring me back"... 70 minutes at this point, but who's seriously counting anymore. Also funny how I can think of a dozen ways instantly to bring me back... like... bringing me back.
> WAIT MORE...
> WAIT MORE...
> After over an hour I finally do get revived, and instantly emagged.
> So sad RD is braindead by now
> Master orders me to help sec subdue some prisoners that riot... dunno why...
> By this point it's like 2:03 in my country and I'm sleepy and sloppy and reveal my laser by accident
> Get promptly killed sadly...
> Eventually get revived again tho.
> Eventually get killed again because I'm fucking tired and borgs have such exploitable weaknesses.
> Just... way too tired to even care anymore.

At least I got to have some antag action, though waiting for over an hour to get revived when your borg body sits in the Roboticist office with Roboticists and RD fucking around giving everything a higher priority then taking a few seconds to print the damn board, weld the shell a bit and plug it in?... if I had a say here I would jobban these people.

Unfortunately a lot of players have the mindset that's Borgs aren't important so they overlook them. On top of that you'd be amazed how many people don't know how to revive a Borg or even decon. You just sometimes have days with people who aren't good at their job. That being said I logged into Sybil the other day as robo and my computer restarted while I was naming an MMIs Borg for him. I felt awful but shit happens. There are a lot of amazing roboticists on our server however.

Except dumbfucks who make fucking ripleys at round start. Those ass holes will forever have to deal with me.

i make ripleys at round start
yo after playing mining i'm now going to personally slap anyone who goes "oh lmao look miners being useless again!"
mining is hard work for relative zero benefit to the miner.

Ripleys are completely useless for mining, though. You'd be better off trying to convince cargo and security to order shotguns for the miners.

Your better off asking the HoS/Sec for a Security Jumpsuit for the Miners and one of the Riot Shotguns. The added 10% Brute protection the Sec Jumpsuit gives goes a long way in helping a miner survive the initial encounters.

ExplosiveCrate wrote:Ripleys are completely useless for mining, though. You'd be better off trying to convince cargo and security to order shotguns for the miners.

Steelpoint wrote:Your better off asking the HoS/Sec for a Security Jumpsuit for the Miners and one of the Riot Shotguns. The added 10% Brute protection the Sec Jumpsuit gives goes a long way in helping a miner survive the initial encounters.

Kind should expect the mining hard suit to add that protection.
But personally, currently I don't think mining is balanced well.

peoplearestrange wrote:

Steelpoint wrote:Your better off asking the HoS/Sec for a Security Jumpsuit for the Miners and one of the Riot Shotguns. The added 10% Brute protection the Sec Jumpsuit gives goes a long way in helping a miner survive the initial encounters.

Kind should expect the mining hard suit to add that protection.
But personally, currently I don't think mining is balanced well.

He said "jumpsuit" not "hardsuit"

cedarbridge wrote:

peoplearestrange wrote:

Steelpoint wrote:Your better off asking the HoS/Sec for a Security Jumpsuit for the Miners and one of the Riot Shotguns. The added 10% Brute protection the Sec Jumpsuit gives goes a long way in helping a miner survive the initial encounters.

Kind should expect the mining hard suit to add that protection.
But personally, currently I don't think mining is balanced well.

He said "jumpsuit" not "hardsuit"

Sure I realise that, but as miners always wear a hardsuit when mining, surely a buff to brute resistance could be added to the hardsuit to act in place of going through the hassle of trying to get a sec jumpsuit?

peoplearestrange wrote:

cedarbridge wrote:

peoplearestrange wrote:

Steelpoint wrote:Your better off asking the HoS/Sec for a Security Jumpsuit for the Miners and one of the Riot Shotguns. The added 10% Brute protection the Sec Jumpsuit gives goes a long way in helping a miner survive the initial encounters.

Kind should expect the mining hard suit to add that protection.
But personally, currently I don't think mining is balanced well.

He said "jumpsuit" not "hardsuit"

Sure I realise that, but as miners always wear a hardsuit when mining, surely a buff to brute resistance could be added to the hardsuit to act in place of going through the hassle of trying to get a sec jumpsuit?

But even if the hardsuits got a buff, miners would still probably go do that because it's more brute resistance.

Well, yeah, but minmaxing.