/tg/Station 13

Posted: **Wed Jul 19, 2017 1:54 am**

Bottom post of the previous page:

>Finally get cult, my favourite antag
>I'm also a roboticist, which is almost a scientist, so I can make bombs without anyone batting an eye
>Some stealthmin messes with viewing range
>Make four maxcaps, loudly warn my bros that I'm about to use them on specific locations
>As one of my cult bros gets cucked by xray geneticists (typical), I blow armory to bits
>My next stop is bridge
>Stun an engineer on the way there, I'm going to need constructs
>Suddenly, server freezes for five seconds or so
>And restarts
>Again
>Just like it did six billion times today

Goofball, I love you, but I'm getting real tired of your shit

Posted: **Wed Jul 19, 2017 3:36 am**

InsaneHyena wrote:
Spoiler:
>Finally get cult, my favourite antag
>I'm also a roboticist, which is almost a scientist, so I can make bombs without anyone batting an eye
>Some stealthmin messes with viewing range
>Make four maxcaps, loudly warn my bros that I'm about to use them on specific locations
>As one of my cult bros gets cucked by xray geneticists (typical), I blow armory to bits
>My next stop is bridge
>Stun an engineer on the way there, I'm going to need constructs
>Suddenly, server freezes for five seconds or so
>And restarts
>Again
>Just like it did six billion times today

Goofball, I love you, but I'm getting real tired of your shit

yeah I was on the server when that happened but I just wanna say that the "viewing range" is actually a gun called the Particle Accelerator or whatever. I only know because I had one 3 rounds before that, it was in sec for some reason, and the guy who gave it to me said it randomly showed up on the floor.

Posted: **Thu Jul 20, 2017 6:12 am**

>Goofball, I love you, but I'm getting real tired of your shit

is this a meme now

Posted: **Thu Jul 20, 2017 1:16 pm**

Start as a miner, in clock cult. Only one other person roll calls, and they had abandoned a gang leader spot on the other server. I had gotten ghosted into them then died like a chump. Thanks Scuff.

Manage to convert the mining borg a right after the ash storm dies down. Tell it to go convert the AI. Don't want to convert the other miners because then the people on station won't be able to use geass.

First ash storm hits; I take all the minerals to R&D. Hoping to gain the cult a foothold in science. We are at 4/6 still. Scuff has stolen the spare ID and the radio is yelling about him. Get mining bag and a pair of advanced mining tools, for "dual wielding". Don't manage to convert or blow the cults cover. Convert the QM who has never played cult before, so I direct them to the wiki.

Find an ash ligger nest. Hell yes if we can EVER get that borg to go get the AI we even have combat upgrades. OH Geass will still work to convert. Convert an ash ligger. A second one comes up and kills me. The new cultist makes no attempts to help me.

It could have been the ash lizard cult! We had a free converted AI (but didn't). When people say "conversion modes suck" do they just mean "fuck teamwork?"

Posted: **Thu Jul 20, 2017 2:35 pm**

>Dual wielding

Deserved

Posted: **Thu Jul 20, 2017 3:09 pm**

I didn't actually want it for myself. I wanted a second to give to someone else once I converted them so they had a ranged weapon.

Posted: **Thu Jul 20, 2017 5:52 pm**

>died to a half naked lizard with a stick when you have a 40 damage ranged weapon

deserved

Posted: **Thu Jul 20, 2017 6:51 pm**

Armhulen wrote:>died to a half naked lizard with a stick when you have a 40 damage ranged weapon

deserved

He deserved to get to see the light of Ravtar too.

But seriously, I've never managed to convert ashwalkers before and the idea of cultists invading from the planet seemed amazing. I guess that's actually kinda close to what the rework is planning.

Posted: **Thu Jul 20, 2017 7:26 pm**

Ratvar worst god. Clankers, kill yourselves

Posted: **Fri Jul 21, 2017 6:16 am**

Truly the badderest.

Posted: **Fri Jul 21, 2017 4:30 pm**

>chemist
>decide to make lube grenade
>put phosphorus and potassium ( i think ) into one beaker
>think of what to put also in the beaker
>put water into the beaker
>the beaker with potassium
>explosion
>plasma turns into gas
>i get knocked over
>die within a minute
reee

Posted: **Sun Jul 23, 2017 9:38 pm**

>Do you want to play as lightgeist?
>Sure, why not.
>Find out that it's a little floating spacejelly thing that speaks slimelish, doesn't understand common and interacts with things by healing them.
>Cool. This is my kind of gameplay - gently floating around, healing and confusing the crew.
>A scientist decides to do a xenobiology reaction in the bar...
>...the one that makes a bunch of hostile mobs.
>Get chased around medbay for 30 seconds by a spacecarp
>People watching impassively, it never changes its target and there's nowhere for me to run
>Get bitten once and die
>Player who summoned the mobs claims in deadchat that they did it by accident, making my death completely in vain.
>I have never seen this thing before, I got to play as it for ten minutes, and I will likely never be able to play as one again.

Posted: **Mon Jul 24, 2017 12:34 am**

AnonymousNow wrote:>Do you want to play as lightgeist?
Sadness

It comes from an anomalous crystal from one of the megafauna.

Posted: **Mon Jul 24, 2017 1:37 am**

Nabski wrote: It comes from an anomalous crystal from one of the megafauna.

Do tell.

Posted: **Mon Jul 24, 2017 1:44 am**

AnonymousNow wrote:
Nabski wrote: It comes from an anomalous crystal from one of the megafauna.
Do tell.

If you kill the colossus you get this IIRC. It was meant as a replacement for the blackbox.

Posted: **Mon Jul 24, 2017 2:05 am**

BeeSting12 wrote:If you kill the colossus you get this IIRC. It was meant as a replacement for the blackbox.

Neat. I spawned in a hidden area of the station on my own, so I figured it was a wizard thing.

Hey, what happened to the Blackbox?

Posted: **Mon Jul 24, 2017 3:51 am**

People started putting spellbooks in it and getting it every round then being a wizard every round. A wizard that thirsts for valids.

A lightgiest got spawned in honor of your post a few hours ago.

Posted: **Mon Jul 24, 2017 4:12 am**

Nabski wrote:People started putting spellbooks in it and getting it every round then being a wizard every round. A wizard that thirsts for valids.

Oh, yes. I guess it only saved items, not their read/unread states.

Nabski wrote:A lightgiest got spawned in honor of your post a few hours ago.

Cool. May the spirit of the little blue healing thing carry on throughout the servers for all time.

Posted: **Mon Jul 24, 2017 8:24 am**

I'm still seeing fucking red after this fiasco.

Roll CE as planned. Looking to build a sweet housing unit for the BSA. I figure if I focus entirely on building, I'll have time to finish it before TGs notoriously short rounds cut it down.
Attempt to delegate solar array wiring to my one lone engineer. Easy.
"I uh, don't know how to wire the solars."
The easiest form of power generation, whatever. I roll my eyes and tell him not to worry about it. I'll do it. I finish packing up the extra metal and supplies for the BSA orbital platform and start wiring the solar arrays. I get halfway done.
"Engineering to cargo. A goliath ripped apart the mining dock."
My derpy engineer is on the other side of the station, and I'm already in space. I backtrack to cargo and patch up the hole, repressurize QMs office. And make it look decent.
Go back to wiring solars.
"Engineering to brig"
I wait a moment, and ask, "What happened."
"We've got a breach"
Rolling my eyes, I put off starting my project yet again and head off to brig from space. The locker room windows were all smashed out, and the HoS is surverying the damage. I wave to him and start welding the glass shards and rounding up the metal rods. I begin pushing all the lockers back inside and wrenching them in place.
Finally. Everything is neat and tidy. I begin to to start the actual repairs when suddenly...
Blood stained EVA-suit roboticist approaches from starboard. Wielding a stun baton no less. I draw my tele baton and prepare to defend myself but he's already on top of me. harm-stun, harm-stun, prods. Holy shit the baton was out of charge?! I madly start clicking on the fallen telebaton, I may well have a chance here. No such luck. I fall into crit before I can recover the baton and killed. Then... the frustration truly begins.
"I got the brig looter"
He's actively calling for security over the radio, and begins going through my things. The suspicious fucker wasn't the cause of the breach, just a goddamn validhunter that got their hands on a baton and space suit. I'm just praying that one of the officers that originally called me to repair the breach comes by and sets him straight. I watch helplessly as he happens to choose a zig-zag path out of the brig that perfectly misses the only other officer in the area as they were coming in.
He's now wearing my completely blood soaked hardsuit, dragging my body behind him labeled Chief Engineer. No one stops to question this. I'm taken all the way to medbay and into cloning. An officer is there. Looks at me, looks at the bloodied CE hardsuit. Back to me. "Huh. That's weird" and goes about his business.
I'm eventually cloned and stuffed into cryo. At this point, the roboticist realizes his immense fuckup and leaves the hardsuit behind. My clothes are left in a pile, sans my tie, and satchel. Which are still in the brig where I was looted.
I'm still mad at the roboticist for being reckless validhunter, and ask for an apology over PDAs. surprisingly, I get it, and feel better over the whole ordeal.
Grumbling, I get dressed and prepare to head back to the brig to finish my wor-
You are having a seizure!
AAAAAAA!
I painfully limp to genetics for a mutadone pill, in between moments of infuriating blindness and stuns.
Get the mutadone. Find a mirror, fix my hair. Alright. Off the brig. Then to last solar array. THEN to my BSA project.
I have to ask the AI to let me into the locker room, but that goes without too much
"CE to chapel"
ಠ_ಠ
"Hadrian come to the chapel please"
Fine. Whatever. I dart out into space and circle around to escape wing and enter the chapel. The curator and his buddy have combined the two areas into a big fort. complete with multiple wooden barricades, fresh walls, and most impressively, force shield barriers that they likely borrowed from xenobio. They need my help wiring, and unlocking them.
That's fine, I can put up with this one last task. I finished the wiring. And it'll help make someone else's round a little cooler. I unlock the generators. Now back to-- The generators are turned on.
instantly gibbed.
Hadrian Melik moans: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Posted: **Mon Jul 24, 2017 8:29 am**

Shit man, that's rough.
Have lizards of sympathy.

Posted: **Mon Jul 24, 2017 8:31 am**

seriously though side note here but shield generator gibbing is one of the best features in this game

Posted: **Wed Jul 26, 2017 1:20 am**

>atmos tech on box
>ur da tator
>ok neat but i wanna try something cool
>grab the atmos suit
>other atmos tech gene ball gets pissy
>"gonna take that and run?"
>no fuck off
>start optimizing atmos when gene comes at me with an axe
>he gets some hits in but i run to sec
>he chases
>an officer RUNS PAST ME while im bleeding everywhere and yelling for help
>he gets my leg off, im in crit when he tries to drag me to maint
>borg grabs my body and drags it to medbay
>takes my critted body to cloning
>no borg no
>cant figure out why i dont clone
>die JUST as it decides to take me to cyro
>good fucking work borg
>doc revives me
>cyros me
>spend literally seven minutes in cryo because the docs didnt set it up at all
>docs cant figure out why im not healing
>finally someone figures it out and i heal
>lizard gives me new leg
>go to brig where they're holding gene
>GOOD PERMA HIM
>they have his jumpsuit and the axe with my blood on it
>hos parrots "we need to scan" without going to get the scanner at all
>eventually wanders off leaving gene in a cell
>miya misa, world's shittiest lawyer, starts demanding gene's freedom
>"HE'S INNOCENT THERE'S NO PROOF MY CLIENT DID NOTHING WRONG"
>he killed me you shit
>"BUT YOU'RE ALIVE"
>are you really this stupid, medbay revived me
>"NO PROOF OF WRONGDOING"
>there's literally an axe and jumpsuit there covered in my blood, i have a prosthetic leg from where he cut mine off, and the medstaff are telling you over radio they revived me
>miya wont have it
>takes it upon herself to try to disassemble the window
>warden comes out of the armory for the first time in this entire time
>takes the time to baton me and drag me out while miya finishes disassembling the window
>starts throwing shit at it when warden finally catches on
>two officers, warden, and miya herself getting zapped
>get fed up with all this blatant incompetence and just bomb sec
>call out sec in deadchat
>"BUT HE SAID YOU WERE SABOTAGING ATMOS BRO"
>did you go to check this at all
>"WE'RE NOT OMNIPOTENT"
>mfw they had all this evidence and are still trying to make it look like they have a handful of brain cells

very salted rn, i hate playing sec so much but when people this blatantly and objectively incompetent or outright stupid play it i basically have a duty to. this whole round was fucking disgusting

EDIT:
>hos on box
>seven officers not including me or warden
>we robust traitors within five minutes
>server crashes

WE COULD HAVE MADE A UTOPIA

Posted: **Wed Jul 26, 2017 9:50 am**

Killing all antagonists is not utopia.

Posted: **Wed Jul 26, 2017 4:26 pm**

Deitus wrote: His Version

My Version

>Ling Kills Traitor without using any ling powers
> Medbay is worthless
> Borgs are worthless
> Security is worthless
> AI is not worthless and bolt me down in atmos, then procedes to ignore requests to be let out, since you know harmful human.
> Get caught, stinging everyone for the ID's. I'm sure I'll be put in perma or something soon so I can just monkey out in the vents or executed so I can revive and walk off.
> Oh Hey Deitus is back
> Oh hey it's been 10 minutes and they still have me standing in the hallway.
>15 minute mark, I'm in a cell now.
> At this point I'm confessing to guilt in the hopes that things will move on. Fuck I should have just adrenaled or biodegraded at the start of this.
> No timer, no sentence, no hope.
> Someone eventually bombs the brig and I get to escape. It gibs my escape as target and their ID. I never got to sting them.
> Ok whelp time to just stalk security and kill the rest of them.

Seriously this round was garbage.

Also I've been enjoying setting up sheild generator death traps lately. The first try with just slipping was good. The second try with thermals and a hallway maze was better, if less funny since I didn't have a borgs MMI shouting not to walk down the hallway while I'm getting more and more people. The most important lesson is that you kill nothing of value because apparently the only ones wandering around are greyshirts, security, and heads.

Posted: **Wed Jul 26, 2017 4:26 pm**

DemonFiren wrote:Killing all antagonists is not utopia.

But killing all lizards is

Posted: **Wed Jul 26, 2017 7:37 pm**

Deitus wrote:snip

Miya is a cunt.

It's kinda funny how irritating she is sometimes.

Posted: **Wed Jul 26, 2017 10:14 pm**

Deitus wrote:WE COULD HAVE MADE A UTOPIA

Antagonists or not, The station will destroy itself one way or another.

Spoiler:

Posted: **Thu Jul 27, 2017 3:50 pm**

Armhulen wrote:seriously though side note here but shield generator gibbing is one of the best features in this game

That reminds me

>Be me doing Xeno
>Have Xeno egg
>Harold Robinson volunteers to feed the egg
>Goes in holding cell
>I start turning on the shields
>Right as I turn on the second shield, he walks through after having been facehumped.
>Instagib, bye bye alien symbiote
>Arm instantly pings me "Hey why did you gib him". Blubber about how it was a complete accident and everything

End of this story is basically, I've got to humanize a monkey and shove his brain in it because I have the situational awareness of a blind sloth.

TL;DR - Am blind, gibbed xenobiology's xeno host, get pinged

Posted: **Thu Jul 27, 2017 7:59 pm**

DiamondSentinel wrote:
Armhulen wrote:seriously though side note here but shield generator gibbing is one of the best features in this game
That reminds me

>Be me doing Xeno
>Have Xeno egg
>Harold Robinson volunteers to feed the egg
>Goes in holding cell
>I start turning on the shields
>Right as I turn on the second shield, he walks through after having been facehumped.
>Instagib, bye bye alien symbiote
>Arm instantly pings me "Hey why did you gib him". Blubber about how it was a complete accident and everything

End of this story is basically, I've got to humanize a monkey and shove his brain in it because I have the situational awareness of a blind sloth.

TL;DR - Am blind, gibbed xenobiology's xeno host, get pinged

holy fucking shit that was so funny

i didn't even know you COULD GIB PEOPLE WITH THAT

Posted: **Fri Jul 28, 2017 5:08 pm**

Armhulen wrote:i didn't even know you COULD GIB PEOPLE WITH THAT

Eight posts prior

Armhulen wrote:seriously though side note here but shield generator gibbing is one of the best features in this game

Posted: **Fri Jul 28, 2017 7:17 pm**

MimicFaux wrote:
Armhulen wrote:i didn't even know you COULD GIB PEOPLE WITH THAT
Eight posts prior
Armhulen wrote:seriously though side note here but shield generator gibbing is one of the best features in this game

i probably posted that the day the gibbing happened, then diamond did their MONTHY forum check and saw my post

Posted: **Fri Jul 28, 2017 7:18 pm**

oh god short term memory?????

Posted: **Fri Jul 28, 2017 8:43 pm**

Body of frog, memory of goldfish.

Posted: **Sat Jul 29, 2017 8:22 pm**

CosmicScientist wrote:>CHangling tears

I dislike changeling myself; as it doesn't offer too much options outside of murder. Next time, ask if you can trade it for tator, or a gimmick. I find it much more fun to use the status of ling as my trade offer.

Or you can do the trapdoor spider gimmick. Chameleon skin, rest somewhere people stand. (HoP line, Cryo, RnD) and sting the fuck out of people.

Posted: **Sun Jul 30, 2017 12:26 am**

Pro tip for ling: Buy only healing and getaway abilities (NOTHING combat related), DNA sting a shitload of people at the beginning, strip completely nude except for your backpack and maybe shoes and radio (keep vital gear like ID in your backpack), transform into somebody you DNA stung and you'll get flesh disguises making you look exactly like them. Then get into as much trouble as you want and use your getaway abilities if you get busted/into trouble, and transform into somebody else when you're out of sight (the flesh disguises will transform too). Ling is actually god tier at impersonating people with flesh disguises, people just tend not to use them because they require removing most of your regular gear.

Posted: **Sun Jul 30, 2017 8:24 am**

Armhulen wrote:
MimicFaux wrote:
Armhulen wrote:i didn't even know you COULD GIB PEOPLE WITH THAT
Eight posts prior
Armhulen wrote:seriously though side note here but shield generator gibbing is one of the best features in this game
i probably posted that the day the gibbing happened, then diamond did their MONTHY forum check and saw my post

Hey, it's not my fault that I was nowhere near a computer for a week, and got banned (oh wait that was). Usually I do a check every 2 weeks or so.

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 2:03 am**

>Spawn as beach bum
>Nobody ever spawns in the beach dome.
>I know that there's a mining APLU abandoned to the West somewhere, as well as an icedome, a Gluttony ruin and a Greed ruin.
>Set out digging
>First problem: I set off gibtonite. That's fine, I was away. I back up and it explodes.
>A second explosion follows it. Fine.
>I approach to continue digging, and a THIRD explosion knocks me down, makes me bleed, and removes an arm.
>Fuckin' right.
>I get into the icedome for shelter. No zombies in the main dome, fortunately. I have a drink to help take the edge off.
>Next is the Gluttony ruin. I don't want to get too close, so I dig around it.
>But I start vomiting anyway. Shit, did I take that much toxin damage?
>No, that can't be right. I didn't take any toxins, surely.
>I get to the Greed ruin, but I've been vomiting and heaving out my guts.
>Return to base to try filling my stomach and heal myself
>On the way, pass someone else who'd spawned from the beach dome
>They'd stuck on a pair of sandals and walked, without oxygen, into my tunnel to their death.
>Fucking useless.
>RTB and eat anything I can get my hand on, including warmed-up Donk pockets.
>They almost immediately come back up. What the fuck is going on?
>My best guess - appendicitis. Given to a ghostrole, of all people.
>Leave, slightly healthier and with more oxygen, crawling through the tunnels
>Just about dodge a goliath and two watchers that have encroached into my digging spaces
>Finally, dig upward and reach the Miner APLU
>It's got a regular drill. Okay, I can work with that.
>Turns out being sick inside the cockpit stops the mech entirely for a good 15 seconds. Great.
>Dig back downwards to the Greed ruin and then the Gluttony ruin
>M-M-M-MASSIVE LAGSPIKE!
>When it ends, I have inexplicably walked into the lava from delayed inputs
>FFFFFUCK
>ABANDON SHIP
>I had this mech for two minutes and it's already dead.
>Ashstorm is still raging, so I quickly get into the ruin before it blows
>In desperation, being irradiated and dying, I use the Veal Render and summon some cows
>I kill the first, and go to carve it up.
>It won't carve.
>Check intent, I know I'm holding something sharp; try again
>IT WON'T CARVE
>Dead cows are useless for the Gluttony Ruin if I can't FUCKING CARVE THEM
>Ash storm ends, and realise my best bet is to hit the Greed Ruin
>I go there and roll a few times, but no dice (harhar)
>Dawdle back towards home base, on a shred of health, hoping to get better and try again
>Shuttle is already well on its way
>The two watchers are in fucking guardian formation right across the mouth of my tunnel, and I don't have my pickaxe with me.
>Try, at least, to squeeze into the gap between them.
>Inevitably one of them comes at me at the wrong moment and aggros, and I instantly get sent into crit.
>Well, no point in delaying the inevitable. I'll just succumb and see what's going on stationside.
>I shit you not, the INSTANT I succumb, a miner comes along and sees me give my last breath.

I have the worst luck.

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 1:08 pm**

>Abusing ghost roles

Deserved

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 2:01 pm**

D&B wrote:>Abusing ghost roles

Deserved

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 2:30 pm**

Qbmax32 wrote:
D&B wrote:~

>Abusing

Yeah, no. There were plenty of ghostroles; I was using one of the unloved ones, with an intent of maybe using another. "Abusing" is more like "spawning, running out to your immediate death, then doing it again with the last remaining sleeper".

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 2:31 pm**

Qbmax32 wrote:
D&B wrote:>Abusing ghost roles

Deserved

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 2:40 pm**

AnonymousNow wrote:
Qbmax32 wrote:
D&B wrote:~
>Abusing

Yeah, no. There were plenty of ghostroles; I was using one of the unloved ones, with an intent of maybe using another. "Abusing" is more like "spawning, running out to your immediate death, then doing it again with the last remaining sleeper".

"It's okay because the ghost role is under used."

Again

Deserved

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 3:36 pm**

Fine, be that way - you'd think I was murderboning or something else anti-social, by the reactions I get.

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 3:52 pm**

AnonymousNow wrote:Fine, be that way - you'd think I was murderboning or something else anti-social, by the reactions I get.

Other people doing shitty stuff doesn't make the shitty stuff you do less shitty.

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 4:06 pm**

D&B wrote: Other people doing shitty stuff doesn't make the shitty stuff you do less shitty.

I find it very strange how you think that one guy doing something in complete isolation on Lavaland, using resources which reset round by round and would not otherwise be used this round, is shitty.

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 4:22 pm**

Because you abused the omnipotence of ghost vision to bee line for something that's supposed to be found randomly. In your own selfish quest of probably getting back on station (since I find no other reason for you to rush the mech.)

It's universally agreed that beachers/vets meta making a path on station or other ruins or megafauna to kill them and get the stuff themselves are thrash. Re write what I said or what you did in whatever way you want, it's still a shit thing to do.

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 4:35 pm**

Cheridan, who implemented the ghost role, said the point of them is to get to ruins or back to the station and that it's fine.

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 4:43 pm**

D&B wrote:Because you abused the omnipotence of ghost vision to bee line for something that's supposed to be found randomly. In your own selfish quest of probably getting back on station (since I find no other reason for you to rush the mech.)

It's universally agreed that beachers/vets meta making a path on station or other ruins or megafauna to kill them and get the stuff themselves are thrash. Re write what I said or what you did in whatever way you want, it's still a shit thing to do.

I see what's happening here - you're mistaking me for someone else, hence the use of "probably" attached to shitty behaviour. Based on your own assumptions, too, which means that this sort of behaviour you've thought of must be close to home.

APLU mechs have drills (or plasmacutters). Drills (or plasmacutters) are good for getting around Lavaland. A pickaxe is, in comparison, not.

So when someone who's observed the round sees a cool thing that they want to play with and isn't going to harm (or even be known of) by anyone, then they've definitely got to ignore it, it seems. Shitty metagaming would be someone using ghostroles after dying to beeline for the station and sabotage/kill their previous character's killer, but in the eyes of some people, this is exactly the same as running around an isolated part of the map.

I take "universally agreed" things with more than a pinch of salt, since it's also "universally agreed" that murderboning using noslips-water/lube, double energy swords, Syndicate revolver etc. is fresh and exciting enough to perpetuate in rounds pretty much every day, and that roleplay is booooooring go back to Baaaaaaaay.

Having typed this, I realised that I won't change your mind, and you won't change mine, so I'll leave you to it.

Posted: **Mon Jul 31, 2017 6:28 pm**

calzilla1 wrote:
Qbmax32 wrote:
D&B wrote:>Abusing ghost roles

Deserved

Posted: **Wed Aug 02, 2017 12:25 am**

>Start as scientist
>Really, really, really want to make adamantium golems, so I call xenobiology
>Get told I'm traitor.
>Okay, traitor adamantium golem army.
>Start feeding slimes, sorting things out etc.
>No researcher, so no improved machinery.
>Alright, that's fine. I'll just be a little slower.
>Abductor appears and I yell at it "GO AWAY I'M BUSY"
>It stuns me and puts me to sleep as I'm ready to call out to security, then teleports away.
>And it doesn't pick me up.
>It eventually teleports back, resets my sleep timer and teleports away again.
>Once more, it doesn't pick me up.
>Repeat this one more time before I finally avoid the sleep baton long enough to wake up.
>Fucksakes, that's 10-15 minutes down the tube.
>It teleports back in, I disarm it and steal both its tools.
>HAVE THAT, YOU BASTARD
>It keeps trying to teleport back in and steal them back, but it doesn't work. It's just focusing on me.
>Eventually get pissed and buy an energy sword. Pick up a cryptographic sequencer at this point as well, since it's on discount and I'll likely use it to reach and slaughter my target later.
>As it teleports in next, I flash up the sword and it immediately ports out. Harhar.
>Next time it teleports in, I figure I'll stun it, put it in a locker and give it to robotics.
>Baton doesn't actually work in human hands. This is the time that I find this out.
>Abductor gets a crackin' lovely first disarm attempt knockdown, at which point it puts me to sleep, again.
>Actually ports me out this time.
>Surgery is achingly slow.
>Finally get ported back to the science lobby, where the whole station is on fire.
>Run back to my department and get back to work. Feel no different other than a desire for organs.
>Really? Still four gold slimes after, like, the third mutation? Fuck you, RNGsus.
>I begin working again, when suddenly EMP.
>I make EMPs randomly.
>My consoles break.
>
>I run out of my department looking for glass. I am desperate. I am so close.
>Run into robotics, where a cyborg is sitting, partially complete and locked down.
>Roboticist tells me that the AI is rogue and that this cyborg is a liability.
>Tell him I stole an E-mag from... something earlier, and use it
>Cyborg is now subverted for me, but still locked down
>Tell it to defend science department
>Tell roboticist that it'll help if he fixes it, as I move to go back to my department
>Roboticist pushes me into a corner, grows an armblade and begins gouging at me
>Fucksakes, seriously? I'm the target for a random ling, on top of everything?
>I go straight to my pocket, click on the E-sword there, and activate it.
>Last thing I see before I go into crit is me starting to construct a rack.
>
>Somehow, when I clicked my sword, I instead picked up a random set of rack parts.
>Die, get eaten. Someone actually runs up to the guy as he's eating me and asks "By the way, are you a ling?", before running away, never to be seen again.
>Ling badly impersonates me on the shuttle, wearing his original ID, sounding like a bloody Shakespeare character
>Guy who jumps him decides to space him by putting him next to a breach and hoping
>Doesn't work, he gets his greentext.

When it rains, it pours.
At least my target died. Somehow.

Posted: **Wed Aug 02, 2017 1:49 am**

Im retarded and should wait till the round is over

/tg/Station 13

Stories of rage, tears and regret

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Re: Stories of rage, tears and regret

Re: Stories of rage, tears and regret

Re: Stories of rage, tears and regret

Re: Stories of rage, tears and regret

Re: Stories of rage, tears and regret

Re: Stories of rage, tears and regret