/tg/Station 13

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 6:02 pm**

Bottom post of the previous page:

Qbopper wrote:
Qbopper wrote:you decide to ignore the voices in your head until one of them contributes to your quest to retrieve ye flask

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 6:13 pm**

but dennis is an obvious exit

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 6:16 pm**

Qbopper wrote:
Qbopper wrote:
Qbopper wrote:you decide to ignore the voices in your head until one of them contributes to your quest to retrieve ye flask

EDIT: to clarify I appreciate the reference but dennis is not an obvious exit

nor is not dennis

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 6:25 pm**

take inventory

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 6:43 pm**

bandit wrote:take inventory

you have:

lit, filled lamp
half full oil flask
flint
shitty bent nail

there is also some shitty dried up boards lying around from the door you smashed

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 6:49 pm**

Qbopper wrote:
bman wrote:stick your wooden plank in the seam of the door, get a runner up from across the room and kick it.
you try to lodge a plank into the seam between the door and frame to do some flying jump kick shit

there's not really enough room to wedge something into the space, though, so you just try the flying kick to make yourself feel better

the door doesn't budge

Turn door handle AND then push it

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 6:58 pm**

Anonmare wrote: Turn door handle AND then push it

you get the smart idea to turn the knob before pushing the door

it still doesn't budge, but it did seem to move a little bit more than before

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 7:15 pm**

Douse door in remaining oil. Strike flint off bent nail to make sparks and ignite it. Time to burn our way out boys

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 8:33 pm**

Wyzack wrote:Douse door in remaining oil. Strike flint off bent nail to make sparks and ignite it. Time to burn our way out boys

are you trying to burn the metal door with oil

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 8:34 pm**

OH

BURN THE FUCKING WOOD WITH THE OIL YOU FOOLS

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 8:46 pm**

bman wrote:are you trying to burn the metal door with oil

Qbopper wrote:you go back to the solid door

it's made of ... wood

Wyzack wrote:Douse door in remaining oil. Strike flint off bent nail to make sparks and ignite it. Time to burn our way out boys

Armhulen wrote:OH

BURN THE FUCKING WOOD WITH THE OIL YOU FOOLS

do you guys mean the wooden door or the planks on the window

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 8:49 pm**

Burn the wall

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 9:07 pm**

BURN THE HOUSE TO THE FUCKING GROUND.

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 9:52 pm**

factoryman942 wrote:Burn the wall

bman wrote:BURN THE HOUSE TO THE FUCKING GROUND.

the voices in your head begin to cry out for blood arson and property damage

you consider fulfilling their wishes for a moment until realizing that the walls appear to be made of stone

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 10:07 pm**

Lightly scorch the wall then

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 10:08 pm**

turn the knob then try to shove the door open using the loose boards as leverage

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 10:15 pm**

factoryman942 wrote:Lightly scorch the wall then

you hold the lamp up to the wall in an attempt to appease your inner pyromaniac

it doesn't do much

bandit wrote:turn the knob then try to shove the door open using the loose boards as leverage

despite the door feeling a little bit more loose when you turn the knob and push, there's still not enough room to jam something between it and the doorframe

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 10:22 pm**

I meant use the boards as a battering ram/extra force to push with

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 10:23 pm**

bandit wrote:I meant use the boards as a battering ram/extra force to push with

whoops sorry

you grab a plank and start pushing the door as hard as you can, but it doesn't want to move

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 10:34 pm**

take the bent rusty nail and examine it

if its shitty soft nail, take the nail and place it between the door frame and bend it to where its easy to use the head of the nail as a flathead screwdriver
- if its a hardcore rusted unmovable nail, run around in circles for a bit, building up a sweat, then take off your shirt and use the parts of your arm pit thats doused in sweat to hold the bend point on the nail, then use some of the dry and less sweaty portions of your shirt to hold it behind the sweaty portion, then hold the nail over the flame on the lamp untill the bend point is red hot, then bend it appropriately, quench it with your spit to harden it once you've done this.

use some of the oil from the oil flask on the hinges of the metal door to lubricate the screws holding it

take off your shirt and tear a strip from the bottom, wrap the strip around the back of the screw to gain more leverage and not damage your hands as much

attempt to turn the screw holding the hinges to the metal door

if the door doesn't have hinges punch yourself in the mouth for wasting so much time without bothering to look and see if the door had hinges with screws holding them on

(im sorry guy's you've been in the same fucking room for a day now come on step your shit up)

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 10:41 pm**

John_Oxford wrote:trying too hard

your elaborate plan is ruined when you realize that this is some shitty medieval house and screws aren't a thing

also there was another valid plan someone else had but when I asked people to specify if they wanted to try lighting the door or window boards on fire no one responded

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 10:46 pm**

"AI open Law 2"

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 11:08 pm**

bandit wrote:"AI open Law 2"

the voices are getting worse

Posted: **Sat Jun 10, 2017 11:27 pm**

test the door for any weak areas

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 12:31 am**

bandit wrote:test the door for any weak areas

you give the door another once over, but it's well made and you won't be able to bash it down

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 12:35 am**

WINDOW BOARDS

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 12:36 am**

Figure out why I want ye flask and how far I'm willing to go for it

What do I have to become?

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 12:37 am**

Limey wrote:Figure out why I want ye flask and how far I'm willing to go for it

What do I have to become?

change it back right fucking now

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 12:38 am**

Armhulen wrote:
Limey wrote:Figure out why I want ye flask and how far I'm willing to go for it

What do I have to become?
change it back right fucking now

not fucking happening

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 12:46 am**

Limey wrote:Figure out why I want ye flask and how far I'm willing to go for it

What do I have to become?

a voice in your head begins to question why you would want ye flask

you quickly silence it

get ye flask

Armhulen wrote:WINDOW BOARDS

this voice is probably on to something

not that you'd know because all it said was "WINDOW BOARDS"

it's probably like the monkey with a typewriter theory, it happened to spout something relevant

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 12:49 am**

Light the window boards on fire

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 1:06 am**

Limey wrote:Light the window boards on fire

taking the flask of oil, you pour it as best you can over the boarded up window and try to hold the lamp's flame to it

it catches and begins to burn

you've probably got a minute to kill

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 1:15 am**

Qbopper wrote:
Limey wrote:Light the window boards on fire
taking the flask of oil, you pour it as best you can over the boarded up window and try to hold the lamp's flame to it

it catches and begins to burn

you've probably got a minute to kill

Consider the job benefits to being thy dungeonman

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 1:19 am**

Anonmare wrote:Consider the job benefits to being thy dungeonman

pros:

-ye flask

cons:

-hard to get ye flask

the boards look like they're beginning to properly catch

what do you do

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 1:31 am**

twiddle my thumbs and try to imitate a frog

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 1:34 am**

Armhulen wrote:twiddle my thumbs and try to imitate a frog

you try to croak as if you were a frog

you inhale a whiff of acrid smoke from the window

it's burning pretty well

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 2:13 am**

do a lil jig

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 2:14 am**

Armhulen wrote:do a lil jig

you do a little dance

the planks have burned off and you're mildly confident that you can climb through without lighting yourself on fire

what do you do

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 2:14 am**

look through

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 2:17 am**

Armhulen wrote:look through

you can't see everything immediately, but

the backyard is covered with tiles - weeds have begun to poke through the cracks

there is a huge stone wall surrounding the backyard - ivy has begun to grow on it

there's no good footholds, the ivy is young and weak, and the wall is very tall, so you're probably not making your way over it

you see a shed in the corner of the yard

what do you do

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 2:20 am**

will this fall incapacitate me?

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 2:21 am**

Armhulen wrote:will this fall incapacitate me?

you tell me

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 2:21 am**

hop on through and head towards the shed

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 2:22 am**

Armhulen wrote:hop on through and head towards the shed

you climb on through, avoiding self immolation

you note a cellar door in the other corner connected to the house

there's also a fountain directly in front of you that i forgot to describe you didn't see

there's a bird's nest on the roof of the shed

the door to the shed is ajar

what do you do

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 2:28 am**

I see shed. I enter shed.

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 2:34 am**

Armhulen wrote:I see shed. I enter shed.

you push the door open

a bird flutters out a small hole in the roof

there is a rake inside

what do you do

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 2:39 am**

acquire rake, destroy bird's nest.

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 5:34 am**

Search the fountain for coins or some shit

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 4:33 pm**

Armhulen wrote:acquire rake, destroy bird's nest.

you get rake

you shamelessly beat the shit out of the birds nest with the rake (awkwardly)

an egg falls out and shatters on the ground

that's a fucking fetus you just killed

bandit wrote:Search the fountain for coins or some shit

you go to the fountain wondering what fucking crazed personality in your head would make you do something like that

as you approach you can see that it is filled with murky green water\

that shit's probably been building up algae and shit for years, if you stick your hand in it'll probably be like a goddamn pile of dirt

do it anyways y/n

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 5:51 pm**

Qbopper wrote:
Armhulen wrote:acquire rake, destroy bird's nest.
you get rake

you shamelessly beat the shit out of the birds nest with the rake (awkwardly)

an egg falls out and shatters on the ground

that's a fucking fetus you just killed

bandit wrote:Search the fountain for coins or some shit
you go to the fountain wondering what fucking crazed personality in your head would make you do something like that

as you approach you can see that it is filled with murky green water\

that shit's probably been building up algae and shit for years, if you stick your hand in it'll probably be like a goddamn pile of dirt

do it anyways y/n

DO IT

Posted: **Sun Jun 11, 2017 5:56 pm**

you stick your hand in the gross fountain water

you start swirling it around looking for... something, I guess, when something nips at your hand

you yank your hand out of the hellspawn evil demon fountain fuck my finger ow ow ow

/tg/Station 13

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