[CoconutWarrior9] Jackrip - A genuine blacklist appeal

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jackrip
Joined: Tue Nov 22, 2016 1:16 am
Byond Username: Jackrip

[CoconutWarrior9] Jackrip - A genuine blacklist appeal

Post by jackrip » #663890

BYOND account: Jackrip

Character name: Korol Konets

Ban type: Blacklist, discord + server + forums

Ban length: Permanent

Ban reason: Joked about doxing an administrator and posted their social media account in another discord. This is not acceptable and per Rule 7,Doxing and SWATing: Doing it, encouraging it, or joking about it will lead to a permanent in-game, Discord, and forum ban.

Time ban was placed:2021-05-27 02:04:22

Server you were playing on when banned: N/A

Round ID in which ban was placed: N/A

Your side of the story:

Let me start by saying that this is a blacklist ban, and likely cannot be appealed. Knowing that, this is first and foremost an appeal to those I have wronged, as well as the ss13 community. Secondly, an appeal to MSO, who is the only one who can lift my ban. I want to note that I had previously posted an "appeal" written by an AI. That was created because I was afraid to face the reality of coming clean to this community. It was made in jest, but the situation is very serious, and as such deserves a serious response. That post must have been disgusting to those I hurt as it made light of my awful behavior, and I'm sorry.

Second, the ban reason isn't a holistic view of what I did, and in fact hides a lot of the ugliness and toxicity around my actions. The first time I appealed I blamed the victim, argued for my innocence, and genuinely thought I was in the right. You can see that in the original appeal here viewtopic.php?f=34&t=29175&p=601425&hil ... ip#p601425.

I want to break down how toxic and atrocious my behavior really was. But before that, let's give a quick non-opinionated summary as to what happened: I posted an ss13 player's digg profile to a private discord, threw out a litany of insults behind their back, and then attacked someone who I thought had notified administrators about my actions. You can see exactly what I said in the original appeal towards the bottom.

Now, I did doxx someone, even if their profile name matched, full stop. I posted an external social media account for an ss13 player to a fringe community. I'm very lucky that community I shared it to were better than I am. They let the TGStation administrators know immediately and warned the person who got doxxed. I might have damaged their career, social life, and personal relationships by sharing that link. There is zero excuse for doing something like this, and anyone doing this absolutely deserves to be removed from the community.

I've thought a lot about how I behaved and why I did it. I think I was acting out of pure ego, addiction, and toxicity. This game had become such an obsession for me that I viewed people I had problems with in game as real life enemies, dehumanizing them and attacking the person behind the screen. This went beyond the person I doxxed, but to coders I disagreed with, other players, and admins. My own distorted egotistical view made me believe I was in the right, and anyone who had gone against me didn't deserve respect or decency. My perspective was toxic, pathetic, and harmful. Words can't express my guilt and regret for acting like this towards all of you, I ruined many friendships I had been building for years, and left a disgusting mark on a wonderful community.

Alongside the doxx I was so angry with the situation I had a full on meltdown towards some innocent bystander. They didn't do ANYTHING. And whoever did was completely in the right anyways. The things I said speak to a toxic, egotistical mindset. I'm very sorry for how I treated those I hurt, and while I don't expect you to forgive me, I hope my apology can bring some peace of mind to those involved.

Why you think you should be unbanned: I've spent a lot of time thinking about my actions, and how I've hurt others. The fact is that I don't deserve to be unbanned. With great callousness I hurt the ss13 community, I damaged peoples lives, and I irreparably destroyed my reputation. I just can't go forward without trying to make it right. I've spent a lot of time working on myself since I was blacklisted, through therapy, health, marriage, friendships, and work. Only now can I see the mistakes I've made. I would love a chance to try again, to repair these bridges, to prove I can be a better person. I ask that you give me a chance at redemption.

References of good conduct: None. I've been entirely absent from the community and other servers, besides that which I hosted: Voidcrew. I shut it down recently but while it was online I tried to give players the best experience I could. I learned about the trials of administration, coding, maintenance, and the work that goes into hosting a server. It gave me some eye-opening perspective and has made me regret how I treated others even more.
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Timberpoes
In-Game Game Master
Joined: Wed Feb 12, 2020 4:54 pm
Byond Username: Timberpoes

Re: [CoconutWarrior9] Jackrip - A genuine blacklist appeal

Post by Timberpoes » #663893

Blacklists are not appealable, although many have tried and some have been removed before.

I have approved this primarily because of the content of your appeal and - maybe I'm gulliable, but - what I see as your attempt to mend bridges and provide closure to people regardless of this appeal's outcome.

You are 100% correct that the only path back to our servers is removal from the blacklist. That is something that can only be done under MSO's prerogative power.

Your appeal history:
Previous shitpost appeal in June 2022 viewtopic.php?f=34&t=31975
Original appeal in May 2021 viewtopic.php?f=34&t=29175

The banning admin does not need to respond to this appeal unless the blacklist is removed.

If MSO does not post here stating they are removing your blacklist, your appeal will be summarily closed.

In my experience, if MSO doesn't post after a week then he is not interested in doing it. As such, this appeal will remain open for one week to give chance for him to respond if he's interested.
/tg/station Codebase Maintainer
/tg/station Game Master/Discord Jannie: Feed me back in my thread.
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jackrip
Joined: Tue Nov 22, 2016 1:16 am
Byond Username: Jackrip

Re: [CoconutWarrior9] Jackrip - A genuine blacklist appeal

Post by jackrip » #663905

Thank you for the opportunity, I appreciate any chance to try and repair some of the damage that's been done.
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Timberpoes
In-Game Game Master
Joined: Wed Feb 12, 2020 4:54 pm
Byond Username: Timberpoes

Re: [CoconutWarrior9] Jackrip - A genuine blacklist appeal

Post by Timberpoes » #664566

Every so often we may allow an appeal to sit around as we did here. MSO has engaged with blacklisted players in the past.

Without an MSO reply, there's no way any appeal of this nature can progress. Anything dox-related or dox-adjacent is frankly just going to be too serious.

Sometimes it's easier to not have acted in the first place, than to have acted then asked for forgiveness.

This appeal stands as a good opportunity to remind everyone of the consequences of taking things too far.

SS13 is just a game. We're here to have fun. The stakes should never give rise to scenarios like those which led to this blacklisting.
/tg/station Codebase Maintainer
/tg/station Game Master/Discord Jannie: Feed me back in my thread.
/tg/station Admin Trainer: Service guarantees citizenship. Would you like to know more?
Feb 2022-Sep 2022 Host Vote Headmin
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