i am angry about bidets again

Anonmare · Post by **Anonmare** » Sat Oct 13, 2018 3:17 am #445167

Bottom post of the previous page:

Water contains fluorine and I don't want my asshole calcifying shut

obscolene · Post by **obscolene** » Sat Oct 13, 2018 4:34 am #445182

I'm glad (((they))) stopped putting asbestos in the water before I was born.

Nervere · Post by **Nervere** » Sat Oct 13, 2018 4:40 am #445185

imagine unironically posting in a literal shitpost like this thread

SaveVatznick · Sat Oct 13, 2018 6:14 am

oranges wrote:
wubli wrote:
SaveVatznick wrote:why would you eat an ass it's an asshole it's gross.

Malkevin · Post by **Malkevin** » Sat Oct 13, 2018 1:53 pm #445269

Who is that woman?

bman · Post by **bman** » Sat Oct 13, 2018 5:20 pm #445315

>be american

Deitus · Post by **Deitus** » Sat Oct 13, 2018 5:29 pm #445319

Y O U
A M E R I C A N S !

bman · Post by **bman** » Sat Oct 13, 2018 5:35 pm #445320

>get shot

Super Aggro Crag · Sat Oct 13, 2018 5:40 pm

>bman
>eat tots

bman · Post by **bman** » Sat Oct 13, 2018 5:45 pm #445328

Reported for harassment.

The ban I ended up with is a Rule 0 ban, reserved for the biggest nutsacks and assholes that come around to TG, and irredeemably have a good time at other peoples expense. Many other bans could fit, but this one says "You sir are an asshole. The server wants you gone. This is unacceptable."
Why you think you should be unbanned: To be honest, and I know this is not a good thing to write in an appeal, I probably shouldnt be. Not because I dont trust myself to behave like a reasonable adult, but because for the staff that would be involved or responsible for my behavior dont deserve to lose reputation because they gambled on an asshole.
That being said, I am appealing because it has been 5 months now, but honestly feels like a much longer time. I feel like my life has calmed down, and I have left many values behind that led to shallow, and unsportsmanlike behaviors. Looking back, my life was about winning. Winning pixels. Being the last pixel left standing so other people could feel shitty about not being in the game. In my head, and my heart, I had some desire to win even if it cost other people their chance to have fun for the day.

Looking back on these feelings now, and at the behaviors that came with them, they were truly unappealing in someone that is supposed to be an adult. I hope I can say truthfully that I have matured, into something that more closely resembles a 21 year old man than the 10 year old child I was behaving like. Being with a woman that hasnt been a toxic influence in my life, and working in a place where I have been humbled by customers and learned from much older coworkers, I feel like I have been able to refine my sense of self and find satisfaction now in achieving goals with my time, rather than winning in the short term. Games of league are no longer about beating down an enemy team, as long as I can enjoy myself in the time I spend. Playing Runescape is no longer a competition between myself and thousands of people ive never met but want to be better than for no good reason. I hope SS13 is one of those games that I can also turn into something I enjoy, and have fun with, rather than becoming a competitive, childish asshole as I have in the past.

I will say, I completely understand if no one wants to take the chance to vouch for me, or speak up in my favor in fear of agitating the general consensus. If that comes to be the case, rest assured I will take what I deserve knowing full well that I earned it with my own behavior.
If it is the case that you allow me to play on /tg/ again, I would like to ask to be issued an all-jobs ban, minus service jobs that are generally more relaxed and designed to promote roleplay rather than any kind of power play. I hope to work into this slowly, and see if I cant turn my behavior in this game as well into something more mature and enjoyable for everyone, rather than just myself.

Deitus · Post by **Deitus** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 2:00 am #445421

>use bidet
>have to walk around with a moist ass
?????????

MrAlphonzo · Post by **MrAlphonzo** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 2:36 am #445434

A true double edged sword dilemma.

Super Aggro Crag · Sun Oct 14, 2018 2:38 am

Id rather have a double edged sword enema

somerandomguy · Sun Oct 14, 2018 3:22 am

Deitus wrote:>use bidet
>have to walk around with a moist ass
?????????

ass towel

Super Aggro Crag · Sun Oct 14, 2018 4:46 am

Congrats now you have a moist towel getting all mildewy becausw you dont believe in toilet paper

wubli · Post by **wubli** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 7:16 am #445507

it's actually worrying how you don't even try to find out how it works

if you ever get the chance of using one just do it and see for yourself, it feels more comfortable imo.

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 7:25 am #445510

wubli wrote:it's actually worrying how you don't even try to find out how it works

if you ever get the chance of using one just do it and see for yourself, it feels more comfortable imo.

True story about fortune cookies: they look Chinese, they sound Chinese, but they're actually an American invention. which is why they're hollow, full of lies and leave a bad taste in the mouth.

wubli · Post by **wubli** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 7:27 am #445512

FORTUNE COOKIES AREN'T CHINESE???????????????????????????????????????????????????????? I AM ANGRY ABOUT FORTUNE COOKIES AGAIN

CreationPro · Post by **CreationPro** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 7:41 am #445515

i am angry about wubli being angry about things

bandit · Post by **bandit** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 8:06 am #445521

9 pages about dingleberries

the hut reaches a new low

SaveVatznick · Sun Oct 14, 2018 8:08 am

Truly, the Bideters are whiny, as my initial premise dictated. Sad!

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 8:11 am #445525

American foreign policy is simple, yet effective: they steal what they want and destroy what they don't understand. They took something beautiful like the bidet and turned it into a sewage-powered super soaker.

They make a desert and call it peace.

CreationPro · Post by **CreationPro** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 8:35 am #445530

i've never seen anyone so adamant about nether region hygiene

Post by **oranges** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 9:03 am #445539

it's like your butt is being cleaned by the gentle kisses of a water nymph

what's not to like

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 9:17 am #445543

I never expected Americans of all people to be stuck in the Victorian Age when it comes to personal hygiene.

"Golly gee willikers, just the thought of cleansing my arsehole makes me blush! What do you mean I have to touch it with my fingers? By Jove!"

Super Aggro Crag · Sun Oct 14, 2018 9:23 am

There once was a man named Grazyn
Who thought using TP a sin
Though his cornhole was moist
He lacked freedom of choice
And his country was a trash bin

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 9:52 am #445549

Super Aggro Crag wrote:There once was a man named Grazyn
Who thought using TP a sin
Though his cornhole was moist
He lacked freedom of choice
And his country was a trash bin

Grazyn wrote: Would you eat an ass that you knew was only wiped with TP, even if it looked squeaky clean?

answer the question please

Super Aggro Crag · Sun Oct 14, 2018 10:00 am

Grazyn needs to eat ass to survive because his country is so destitite its the only way he can scrounge nutrition.

Post by **oranges** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 10:05 am #445554

Super Aggro Crag wrote:There once was a man named Grazyn
Who thought using TP a sin
Though his cornhole was moist
He lacked freedom of choice
And his country was a trash bin

there once was a man named crag
who's asshole was wiped with a rag
though he had guns
it wasn't much fun
to pay for healthcare with a bag

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 10:09 am #445556

I knew americans don't eat pussy (it's considered "unmanly" to treat women as anything other than property), so I'm not really that surprised to find out they also don't eat ass. But what about getting your *own* ass eaten? Are you really living in some sort of victorian age hellish sexual dystopia?

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 11:33 am #445567

Grazyn wrote:I knew americans don't eat pussy (it's considered "unmanly" to treat women as anything other than property), so I'm not really that surprised to find out they also don't eat ass. But what about getting your *own* ass eaten? Are you really living in some sort of victorian age hellish sexual dystopia?

In Republican states I think they do.

Malkevin · Post by **Malkevin** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 12:16 pm #445575

>letting the girl you kiss lick your anus

That's how you get e coli

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 1:43 pm #445587

Malkevin wrote:>letting the girl you kiss lick your anus

That's how you get e coli

You kiss her before she eats your ass duh. Same thing for BJs, you don't kiss her after that either.

What is this, sex ed 101? Puritan Americans never cease to amaze me.

somerandomguy · Sun Oct 14, 2018 1:58 pm

Grazyn wrote:
Malkevin wrote:>letting the girl you kiss lick your anus

That's how you get e coli
You kiss her before she eats your ass duh. Same thing for BJs, you don't kiss her after that either.

What is this, sex ed 101? Puritan Americans never cease to amaze me.

>implying puritianism wasn't only in the far northern states

wubli wrote:it's actually worrying how you don't even try to find out how it works

if you ever get the chance of using one just do it and see for yourself, it feels more comfortable imo.

Most people probably just don't care enough to find out, especially with grazyn's incoherent rambling
It probably is nice too, but it's the kind of thing a lot of people don't really want to try themselves

iksyp · Post by **iksyp** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 2:05 pm #445592

Grazyn wrote:I knew americans don't eat pussy (it's considered "unmanly" to treat women as anything other than property), so I'm not really that surprised to find out they also don't eat ass. But what about getting your *own* ass eaten? Are you really living in some sort of victorian age hellish sexual dystopia?

>americans don't eat pussy
ok

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 2:46 pm #445607

wow this is disgusting

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/30300236/

D&B · Post by **D&B** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 2:48 pm #445608

Ten pages about shit caked assholes

Congrats guys

Super Aggro Crag · Sun Oct 14, 2018 4:22 pm

oranges wrote:
Super Aggro Crag wrote:There once was a man named Grazyn
Who thought using TP a sin
Though his cornhole was moist
He lacked freedom of choice
And his country was a trash bin
there once was a man named crag
who's asshole was wiped with a rag
though he had guns
it wasn't much fun
to pay for healthcare with a bag

I dont pay for healthcare and i use tp, grazyn is the one with the ass towel. Needs improvement.

wubli · Post by **wubli** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 4:46 pm #445629

Grazyn wrote: Same thing for BJs, you don't kiss her after that either.

barbedwireqtip · Sun Oct 14, 2018 5:07 pm

Is this thread still going?

CreationPro · Post by **CreationPro** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 6:44 pm #445651

I don't want my mouth near anyone's ass and I don't want anyone's mouth near mine

That is just awful poop comes out of there

Anonmare · Post by **Anonmare** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 6:57 pm #445655

CreationPro wrote:I don't want my mouth near anyone's ass and I don't want anyone's mouth near mine

That is just awful poop comes out of there

Loading at rear entrance only

CreationPro · Post by **CreationPro** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 7:08 pm #445659

Anonmare wrote:
CreationPro wrote:I don't want my mouth near anyone's ass and I don't want anyone's mouth near mine

That is just awful poop comes out of there
Loading at rear entrance only

[youtube]32Hp1LW08Yc[/youtube]

BeeSting12 · Post by **BeeSting12** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 7:10 pm #445660

Grazyn wrote: Same thing for BJs, you don't kiss her after that either.

>implying anyone here would know the answer

Sun Oct 14, 2018 7:26 pm

salt-mined

CreationPro · Post by **CreationPro** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 7:39 pm #445670

CitrusGender wrote:salt-mined

we did it digg

Ayy Lemoh · Post by **Ayy Lemoh** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 7:42 pm #445671

D&B wrote:Ten pages about shit caked assholes

Congrats guys

Thank you for explaining this in a nutshell for me.

Thank you for also making me more annoyed that a non-salty thread is in salt reserves.

Sun Oct 14, 2018 7:42 pm

>10 pages
i cannot believe the hut exists

wubli · Post by **wubli** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 8:04 pm #445674

fucking move this back i don't want this thread to exist more than it should have it was posted in the hut for a reason

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 8:34 pm #445682

No no, let it stay as a memorial to how low Americans will stoop to defend their shit-caked assholes because America is the greatest country in the world

CreationPro · Post by **CreationPro** » Sun Oct 14, 2018 9:00 pm #445683

wubli wrote:fucking move this back i don't want this thread to exist more than it should have it was posted in the hut for a reason