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i just saw the biggest shit i swear to god

Posted: Sat Jul 22, 2017 3:41 am
by Deitus
so i work a seasonal job and part of it is cleaning the bathrooms when we close, so im fairly used to nasty things right? but holy fuck today was an outlier

so i mean normally the "highlight" of my day wouldve been the toilet seat wrenched off its base and put into the toilet itself, but today i was walking in and i saw IT

i swear upon all that i have ever loved in my life that this monster was AT LEAST a foot long and three inches in diameter, and thats not even counting the little cap that was separated from the main body

so i call up my manager and he's like "what is there a fetus in there" and im like "well i mean it was def given birth to" and he sees it and he just stares and starts laughing, so he radios to the other assistant manager and tells him to come and he stares and starts laughing, and its just the three of us there staring at this monstrosity in the toilet laughing and trying to figure out how this thing got out of any kind of human's ass. i legit wish i took pics now because you guys would not believe this thing, i mean i've seen some shit both irl and from my time when i browsed /b/ but this thing tops it all, and all three of us swear it was the biggest shit they had ever seen, and the assistant manager is in his 80s so you know he's seen a few

jesus christ guys

Re: i just saw the biggest shit i swear to god

Posted: Sat Jul 22, 2017 4:00 am
by calzilla1
Why do you post this here

Re: i just saw the biggest shit i swear to god

Posted: Sat Jul 22, 2017 4:02 am
by DrPillzRedux
we got a car some guy blew his brains out in

still had brain chunks in between the center console and seats, huge stain in the headliner

away it went to an off site detailer and then some poor soul bought it without even knowing about it

Re: i just saw the biggest shit i swear to god

Posted: Sun Jul 23, 2017 7:14 am
by PKPenguin321
So like how did you dispose of the poop because I'm guessing it wouldn't just be flushed

Re: i just saw the biggest shit i swear to god

Posted: Sun Jul 23, 2017 7:20 am
by Anonmare
This is literal shitposting

Re: i just saw the biggest shit i swear to god

Posted: Sun Jul 23, 2017 10:32 am
by bman
more proof we should add poo

Re: i just saw the biggest shit i swear to god

Posted: Sun Jul 23, 2017 10:37 am
by Malkevin
You know what always amazes me about these monster turds?

Theres never any trace of TP in the bowl.
Was the shit so big it stuck firmly in place while the TP escaped or did the dirty fucker drop and run off with a shitty butt crack or worse is one of those that washes his shitty butt crack in the sink with his hand?

Re: i just saw the biggest shit i swear to god

Posted: Sun Jul 23, 2017 2:19 pm
by lntigracy
i just saw the biggest shit i swear to god
Did you look in the mirror?
Malkevin wrote:You know what always amazes me about these monster turds?

Theres never any trace of TP in the bowl.
Was the shit so big it stuck firmly in place while the TP escaped or did the dirty fucker drop and run off with a shitty butt crack or worse is one of those that washes his shitty butt crack in the sink with his hand?
The biggest shit I've ever taken came out clean, I wiped and nothing came off.

Re: i just saw the biggest shit i swear to god

Posted: Sun Jul 23, 2017 5:26 pm
by Super Aggro Crag
I once took a shit as big as my fist. Literally on the toilet for 4 hours. Its the reason i shit blood now because i tore my asshole.

Re: i just saw the biggest shit i swear to god

Posted: Sun Jul 23, 2017 7:21 pm
by bman
Super Aggro Crag wrote:I once took a shit as big as my fist. Literally on the toilet for 4 hours. Its the reason i shit blood now because i tore my asshole.
are u ok crag go to the doctor you may have an ass hemorrhage

Re: i just saw the biggest shit i swear to god

Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2018 10:04 pm
by Anonmare
Anonmare wrote:This is literal shitposting