/tg/Station 13

We make jokes, may they be terrible or good.

So a black guy, a gay guy and a chinese girl gets in a taxi cab and needs to pay the fair. The black guy can't pay it because he doesn't have money, the gay guy can't pay it because he thought the black guy stole his wallet, the chinese girl says "me so horny" and everyone looks towards the chinese girl to pay the driver.

Conversation:

By chance do you like tapes and cds?
<insert follow up>
Because I wanted to tape my dick to your forehead so you can see these nuts.

I was gonna tell you a joke about babies but im afraid ill have to abort it.

I know lots of messed up humor and jokes but I have elected to share instead, astronomy related pick-up lines.

Girl, you are like an O class star. The hottest!

Babe, we are like the milky way and andromeda, destined to collide.
Hey girl, wanna see my gamma ray burst?

Girl, we are like two large bodies in space. We gravitate towards each other.

Hey, wanna go back to my place and accelerate all our clothes off at -9.81 m/s.

You're pretty, wanna fuck?

What did potassium oxide say about this thread?
It was OK.

Are you from Ireland? Cuz every time I see you my dick is dublin.
i would berry my dick so far inside you whoever pulled it out would be crowned king arthur
are you an antiquair? cuz i have some junk that hasn't been touched in years.

Shit, my dick just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

ColonicAcid wrote:What did potassium oxide say about this thread?
It was OK.

>potassium oxide
>OK
that is not how chemistry works

I was gonna tell you a joke about chemistry but im just afraid they won't get a good reaction.

How do you start an Ethiopian rave?

Duct-tape bread to the ceiling.

knock knock
LMAO

HAAAAIL, LAUGHING MINE OWN BUTTOCKS OFF

waint to hear a joke?

u

What do jews and money have in common? They both turn into ash!

I'm so white during the riots I went out and bought a television

FredNodoor wrote:What do jews and money have in common? They both turn into ash!

Shoulda said they were both used in fireplaces in germany

Two changelings are eating the clown, one of them says "Does this taste funny to you?"

Unless it's changed in the last 2 years, the description for a clown burger is "It tastes funny". :tmyk:

whats the similarity between muslims and e^x

you can integrate as much as you want, but it wont make a difference

What country has the best swimmers?
FINland.

What do you get when you drop a piano down a mineshaft?
A Flat Minor!

Why can't bicycles stand up on their own?
They're Two-Tired!

My grandfather was an athlete, my dad was an athlete, and now I'm an athlete. You could say it runs in the family.

A: Hey did you hear about the kidnapping?
B: No.
A: It was pretty bad, but then the kid woke up.

Did you hear about the guy who got his whole left side cut off?
He's all right now.

What's the difference between a changeling and a pizza?

A pizza doesn't shout ;HELP SHITCURITY when you put it in the oven.

How many security officers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

hahhhhahahahah oh man so good im dying over here

hhahahhhahhahahahaaahahafaggots

What's Gandalf's favourite drink?

RUM YOU FOOLS!

A list of hot girls that you will fuck in your lifetime.

Ive got some sick fucking jokes if you want those. I think I will lay of the dead baby jokes for now however. If any of these jokes offended you please write out a thorough and well thought out response telling me how much they offended you and why. When you are done please shove said response up your ass.

apply this after every joke:

a man is in the hospital after almost choking to death on his cell phone
guess he had a
close call

a boy is in the hospital after holding his breath too long and passing out
"will i recover soon?" he asked
the doctor said, "dont hold your breath"

a man was run down by a motorcycle, forensics say he ran away for two blocks before running out of energy
guess you could say he got
two tired

we just ran forensics on the chefs food, the meat is from a gibbed sec officer
i guess you could say that justice
was served

i heard a server added this short cat species the other day
i guess you could say that that server
is getting a little furry

okay enough YEEAAAAH jokes theyre getting worse with each one

last joke, what do you call a clown who monkies himself at round start

ohh quick one I forgot