The Counting Thread Joke

[kinnebian]

Dear Armhulen.

I was browsing this forums, I had just gotten home from a long car trip. I refresh the page, and glance my eyes across the players club. A new thread. Supper Aggro Crag.
It was entitled "the final counting thread".
I laughed, oh how I chuckled.
The joke I would make would rock worlds.
I click on the thread, my eyes frantically searching through Crag's post, looking to see if my glorious joke had already been taken.
Alas, Joy! It had not been performed!
I raised my hands in glee, and did a flip on spot!
However, when I turned back to the computer I noticed something sinister..
Armhulen.. New reply? 3:08pm, brand new.
And they said, quoth: "too many counting threads"
For a moment I breathed a sigh of relief, but then I realized the horrible truth! It was LOCKED!
In a second of madness I sent a message to dear friend Crag, asking for him to PLEASE unlock it!
"PLEASE SIR!" Quoth I,
"UNLOCK THE THREAD, I HAVE A FINE JOKE TO MAKE!"
But alas.
I did not now, for it was not Crag who had done it, and it was not the only victim.
I backed out, and saw in horror as all of the counting threads, one by one.
"Newest Reply: Armhulen"
The fools! They were being slaughtered and there was nothing to be done! I watched Armhulen climb, and climb.
"NO!" I cried out, in a moment of desperation. "YOU FOOL, ARMHULEN!" I clutched my fist around my mint and bergamot scented candle. Bought that day for 5 euro at Dunnes Stores.
A single tear fell from my eye, and like my candle, the very last counting forum was gone.
I wish for ducks may not have won the election, but he has the admins under his fist, he has them in his pocket.
I come to you with a simple request.
Let me make my simple joke.
Unlock Crag's forum, so I may spread the joy with the world.
Then, you may lock it.

Dearest Wishes,
Kinnebian.

[Armhulen]

OP got a warning for this thread