Difference between revisions of "Jobs"

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In /tg/station 13, your job is somewhat akin to your character class.  It defines your starting equipment, your  [[identification_card|access]] on board the station, and what you're supposed to be doing. Remember, these job descriptions are for humor purposes only. Please follow common sense.
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In /tg/station 13, your job is somewhat akin to your character class.  It defines your starting equipment, your  [[identification_card|access]] on board the station, and what you're supposed to be doing.
  
<!-- please remember that this was once in alphabetical order. The reason it was changed is that the list was simply too long for the alphabet to make it easily navigable. It has been changed to match the categorization in the Jobs template, which you can see at the bottom of each job page. -->
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<!-- please remember that this was once in alphabetical order. The reason it was changed is that the list was simply too long for the alphabet to make it easily navigable. It has been changed to match the categorization in the Jobs template, which you can see at the bottom of each job page. You edit the jobs template page by going here: https://tgstation13.org/wiki/Template:Jobs -->
  
 
{{Template:Jobs}}
 
{{Template:Jobs}}
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* [[Job selection and assignment]]
 
* [[Job selection and assignment]]
  
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{{Important
 +
|Title=Disclaimer
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|Note=<span style="background-color:white"><font color="black">Remember, these job descriptions are for humor purposes only. Please follow common sense.</font></span>
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|Color=#F00
 +
}}
  
 
== Command ==
 
== Command ==
  
 
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#EEEEFF;" class="wikitable sortable"
 
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#EEEEFF;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="background-color:lightblue;" width=200|Job
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! scope="col" style="color:white;background-color:darkblue;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:lightblue;" |Role
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! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="color:white;background-color:darkblue;" |Role
! scope="col" style="background-color:lightblue;" width=100|Difficulty
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! scope="col" style="color:white;background-color:darkblue;" width=100|Difficulty
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_captain.png|64px|link=Captain]]<br>[[Captain]]
 
![[File:Generic_captain.png|64px|link=Captain]]<br>[[Captain]]
|Be responsible for the station. Manage station [[Heads of Staff]]. Secure dat fukken disk. Twist your own head off when the walls start closing in. Have blood feuds with the [[HoP]]. Deal with the Clown with your rapier. Break your own display case to get your gun for 'MAX PROTECTION'. Permabrig the [[chef]] and steal his whetstone.
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|Be responsible for the station, meaning use your authority to powergame any job you want. Manage station [[Heads of Staff]] and their individual neuroses. Secure dat fukken disk by tucking it into bed. Have blood feuds with the [[HoP]]. Use your rapier to slaughter assistants while tolerating amusing antagonists. Break your own display case to get your gun for 'MAX PROTECTION'. Permabrig the [[chef]] and steal his whetstone.
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_hop.png|64px|link=Head of Personnel]]<br>[[Head of Personnel]]
 
![[File:Generic_hop.png|64px|link=Head of Personnel]]<br>[[Head of Personnel]]
|<s>Manage</s> Ignore internal problems. Assign jobs, alter IDs, maintain records, judge the unworthy [[assistant]]s, flood the station with all-access Clowns, be the hero the station <s>needs</s> deserves.<br>
+
|<s>Manage</s> Ignore internal problems. Assign jobs, alter IDs, maintain records, judge the unworthy [[assistant]]s, flood the station with Clowns, distribute silver IDs to those clowns, be the hero the station <s>needs</s> deserves. Protect Ian with your life until a low-reputation traitor stuffs him into the washing machine when you aren't looking. Cry near cargo because [[Quartermaster]] is now the head of his own department, diminishing your purpose in life.
Have blood feuds with the [[Captain]]. Protect Ian or die trying!
+
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Medium
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
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|-
 +
![[File:Generic_hos.png|64px|link=Head of Security]]<br>[[Head of Security]]
 +
|Make sure your team isn't [[Shitcurity]]. Despair when they inevitably are. Wear a stylish yet protective coat. Try to focus your department's efforts on bigger fish than [[Clown|leeches]]. Chase down lone traitors and die alone in maintenance because YOU <b>ARE THE LAW</b>. Revel in the fact that everyone hates you. Rage at the coderbase for not letting you fit the entire armory into your pants anymore. Have blood feuds with the Warden.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Generic_ce.png|64px|link=Chief Engineer]]<br>[[Chief Engineer]]
 +
|Get top-of-the-line engineering equipment, do nothing productive with it. Violently protect your department's equipment from hordes of [[Cargo_Technician|thieving]] [[Assistant|rats]]. Get ignored by your own underlings. Increase the engine's power output until shocked doors violate the Geneva convention. Spend the station's raw material supply on building a giant plastitanium cock in departures. Despair when you're asked to rebuild [[Guide_to_Telecommunications|Telecommunications]].
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Generic_rd.png|64px|link=Research Director]]<br>[[Research Director]]
 +
|Oversee the [[Scientist|demented]] [[Roboticist|manchildren]] of your department. Destroy cyborgs with your magic computer for not respecting you. Use Lamarr as a breath mask. Try to powergame four jobs at once. Take control of the AI and rule the station. Shed a tear when you remember that you could once print guns. Laugh when Security begs you to make them technological shotgun shells.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Generic_cmo.png|64px|link=Chief Medical Officer]]<br>[[Chief Medical Officer]]
 +
|<s>Gently</s> Loudly remind everyone to turn up their suit sensors. Complain when no one listens to you, then laugh when they die alone and afraid. Help the virologist spread an epidemic. Fill your hypospray with <s>Chloral Hydrate</s> hard drugs. Feed Runtime mice from maintenance. Kick out the [[Clown]] every five minutes. Do everything because nobody else knows how wounds work.
 +
!Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Generic_qm.png|64px|link=Quartermaster]]<br>[[Quartermaster]]
 +
|Oversee the operations of cargo, order equipment with credits, and ensure your [[Cargo Technician|cargo techs]] do their jobs. Tell the miners to not die, lose radio contact with all of them ten minutes later. Sell anything valuable you can get your hands on and flaunt your wealth to the other departments. Order a shitton of guns and attempt to secede from the station for the glory of Cargonia for the seventh time that week, then act surprised when security raids the cargo bay to confiscate the guns. Steal as much money as possible and shove it all in your B.E.P.I.S. Dance in the bridge because '''YOU'RE NOW''' ACTUALLY '''A HEAD OF STAFF.''' Get beaten by confused [[Head of Personnel]] who still think cargo is theirs.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Medium
 
|}
 
|}
  
 
== Security ==
 
== Security ==
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#EEEEFF;" class="wikitable sortable"
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{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#ffeeee;" class="wikitable sortable"
 
! scope="col" style="color:white;background-color:darkred;" width=200|Job
 
! scope="col" style="color:white;background-color:darkred;" width=200|Job
 
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="color:white;background-color:darkred;" |Role
 
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="color:white;background-color:darkred;" |Role
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|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_hos.png|64px|link=Head of Security]]<br>[[Head of Security]]
 
![[File:Generic_hos.png|64px|link=Head of Security]]<br>[[Head of Security]]
|Make sure your team isn't [[Shitcurity]]. Wear a stylish yet protective coat. Focus your department's efforts on bigger fish than [[Clown|leeches]].<br>
+
|Make sure your team isn't [[Shitcurity]]. Despair when they inevitably are. Wear a stylish yet protective coat. Try to focus your department's efforts on bigger fish than [[Clown|leeches]]. Chase down lone traitors and die alone in maintenance because YOU <b>ARE THE LAW</b>. Revel in the fact that everyone hates you. Rage at the coderbase for not letting you fit the entire armory into your pants anymore. Have blood feuds with the Warden.
Chase down lone traitors and die alone in maintenance because YOU <b>ARE THE LAW</b>. Revel in the fact that everyone hates you. Carry half the Armory in your backpack. Have blood feuds with the Warden.
 
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_warden.png|64px|link=Warden]]<br>[[Warden]]
 
![[File:Generic_warden.png|64px|link=Warden]]<br>[[Warden]]
|Sit in your office. Sit in your office, again. <s>Never</s> Watch security cameras. Steal from the armory, then order crates to cover it up. Maybe keep an eye or two on the armory (So that no one steals the stuff you want to steal), and SET A GODDAMN TIME TO THE TIMER for any arrested scum.
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|Sit in your office. Sit in your office, again. Be beaten and demoted for leaving your office to get a snack. <s>Never</s> Watch security cameras. Steal from the armory, then order crates to cover it up. Make sure nobody but you loots the armory. Set brig timers because the Head of Security refuses to. Replace the air in an assistants body with the fear of security. Have blood feuds with the Head of Security.
<br>Replace the air in an assistants body with the fear of security. Have blood feuds with the Head of Security.
 
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_security.png|64px|link=Security Officer]]<br>[[Security Officer]]
 
![[File:Generic_security.png|64px|link=Security Officer]]<br>[[Security Officer]]
|Deal with the various [[clown|dirty]] [[assistant|fucking]] [[traitor|criminals]] running amok on the station. Taser people in the eyes. Pretend the Lawyer doesn't exist. Dogpile on traitors. Constantly get bitched at.<br> Harmbaton people to death, claim they were "resisting arrest". Flashbang crowds until they are deaf and blind forever. Arrest someone for a legitimate cause, get called shitcurity.
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|Deal with the various [[clown|dirty]] [[assistant|fucking]] [[traitor|criminals]] running amok on the station. <s>Taser</s> Disabler people in the eyes. Pretend the Lawyer doesn't exist. Dogpile on traitors. Constantly get bitched at. Harmbaton people to death, claim they were "resisting arrest". Flashbang crowds until they are deaf and blind forever. Arrest someone for a legitimate cause and get called shitcurity.
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Hard
+
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_detective.png|64px|link=Detective]]<br>[[Detective]]
 
![[File:Generic_detective.png|64px|link=Detective]]<br>[[Detective]]
|Chain smoke cigarettes. Shoot the useless assistants with your cowboy gun. Lose your cowboy gun in a Space Vegas gambling session. Litter the halls with photos. Solve crimes on rare occasion.  
+
|Smoke two cigarettes and require medical attention. Shoot the assistants with your cowboy gun. Use your cowboy gun to become a serial killer without getting arrested because everyone knows you cannot be an antag. Lose your cowboy gun in a Space Vegas gambling session. Beg security officers for a baton. "Deconstruct" Beepsky for a baton. Harmbaton innocent bystanders. Litter the halls with photos. Maybe actually solve a crime someday.  
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
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!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Medium
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Prisoner_basic.png|64px|link=Prisoner]]<br>[[Prisoner]]
 +
|Lock yourselves up in perma by somehow building walls. Have security barge in 20 minutes later. Throw a ghetto party. Have the AI let you out when there's no security presence. Be eaten by space dragons. Roleplay with the Lawyer until you forge a deep, personal relationship. Don't invite the Warden to the wedding.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
|}
 
|}
  
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|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_ce.png|64px|link=Chief Engineer]]<br>[[Chief Engineer]]
 
![[File:Generic_ce.png|64px|link=Chief Engineer]]<br>[[Chief Engineer]]
|Get top-of-the-line engineering equipment, do nothing with it. Protect your department's equipment from hordes of [[Cargo_Technician|thieving]] [[Assistant|rats]].<br>
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|Get top-of-the-line engineering equipment, do nothing productive with it. Violently protect your department's equipment from hordes of [[Cargo_Technician|thieving]] [[Assistant|rats]]. Get ignored by your own underlings. Increase the engine's power output until shocked doors violate the Geneva convention. Spend the station's raw material supply on building a giant plastitanium cock in departures. Despair when you're asked to rebuild [[Guide_to_Telecommunications|Telecommunications]].
Increase the engine's power output until it turns half the station into a radioactive death zone. Despair when you're asked to rebuild [[Guide_to_Telecommunications|Telecommunications]].  
 
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_engineer.png|64px|link=Station Engineer]]<br>[[Station Engineer]]
 
![[File:Generic_engineer.png|64px|link=Station Engineer]]<br>[[Station Engineer]]
 
|
 
|
Set up the engine and repair any damage to hull and equipment. Nothing is broken? Just give it a few minutes.<br>
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Set up the engine and repair any damage to hull and equipment; if nothing is broken, wait a few minutes. Get shot by emitters, get brutally murdered on the solars by a nuclear agent, get drunk in the bar. Sprint past hull breaches without a second thought. Hack every machine to shoot things at people. Try to light weed on the Supermatter and get vaporized. Frequently remind crew that replacing lightbulbs is the Janitor's job.
Get shot by emitters, get brutally murdered on the solars by a nuclear agent, get drunk in the bar. Sprint past hull breaches without a second thought. Hack every machine to shoot things at people. Try to touch the Supermatter and get vaporized. Frequently remind crew that replacing lightbulbs is the Janitor's job.
 
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_atmos.png|64px|link=Atmospheric Technician]]<br>[[Atmospheric Technician]]
 
![[File:Generic_atmos.png|64px|link=Atmospheric Technician]]<br>[[Atmospheric Technician]]
|Station's ghetto fireman. Ensure everyone can breathe by listening to complaints about how useless you are. If they can talk, everything's within tolerance.<br>
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|Be a ghetto fireman. Make sure everybody is breathing by listening to complaints about how useless you are; if they can talk, everything's within tolerance. Build pipe <s>slides</s> deathtraps. Forget to repair damaged piping. Commit arson. Run around the station looking like a serial killer with a fire suit and axe. Have your axe stolen, break into the bridge for theirs. Get lynched once silicons release plasma into the halls. Perform complicated gas reactions and fusion in the incinerator, then use them to instantly make the station uninhabitable. Try to understand the HFR and fail.
Build pipe slides. Forget all about repairing damaged piping. Run around the station looking like a serial killer with a fire suit and axe. Get lynched once silicons release plasma into the halls.<br>
 
Perform complicated gas reactions and fusion in the incinerator, then use them to make the station uninhabitable.
 
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium  
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium  
 
|}
 
|}
  
 
== Science ==
 
== Science ==
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#EEEEFF;" class="wikitable sortable"
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{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#fbeeff;" class="wikitable sortable"
 
! scope="col" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" width=200|Job
 
! scope="col" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" width=200|Job
 
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" |Role
 
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" |Role
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|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_rd.png|64px|link=Research Director]]<br>[[Research Director]]
 
![[File:Generic_rd.png|64px|link=Research Director]]<br>[[Research Director]]
|Oversee the [[Scientist|demented]] [[Roboticist|manchildren]] of your department. <s>Build</s> Destroy cyborgs with your magic button. Use Lamarr as a breath mask. Take control of the AI and rule the station. Shed a tear when you remember that you could once print guns.
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|Oversee the [[Scientist|demented]] [[Roboticist|manchildren]] of your department. Destroy cyborgs with your magic computer for not respecting you. Use Lamarr as a breath mask. Try to powergame four jobs at once. Take control of the AI and rule the station. Shed a tear when you remember that you could once print guns. Laugh when Security begs you to make them technological shotgun shells.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Geneticist.png|64px|link=Geneticist]]<br>[[Geneticist]]
 +
|Give your monkeys Tourettes and broadcast their cursing across the station. Fry your genes with radiation until you melt down into a literal slug. Accidentally inject yourself with a monkey injector and get impaled by the cook. Have people line up for superpowers like it's a candy store. Infuse people with rat genes so they can live out their maintenance fantasies. Turn people into gorillas. Give the gorillas skateboards.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:scientist_generic.png|64px|link=Scientist]]<br>[[Scientist]]
 
![[File:scientist_generic.png|64px|link=Scientist]]<br>[[Scientist]]
|Get tossed in disposal by the [[Research Director]], "accidentally" blow up toxins, let the Slimes [[Critters#Gold_Slime_Pool|and way more horrifying things]] loose.<br>
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|Get tossed in disposal by the [[Research Director]]. Accidentally blow up Ordinance. "Accidentally" blow up Ordinance. Spend 55 minutes breeding slimes for busted equipment then die to one hardstun. Mass produce horrific clown creatures that would make God reach for the whiskey. Nag mining for diamonds so you can make two Bags of Holding to make a hole in reality, be disappointed when it only serves as a mild nuisance. Kill yourself when someone destroys the ore silo.
Nag mining for diamonds so you can make two Bags of Holding to make a hole in reality, which people will casually build floors over. Refuse to stop at the last three items in the previous list and accidentally kill yourself in enough stupid ways to make murder look like assisted suicide. Suicide when someone destroys the ore silo.
 
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Roboticist.png|64px|link=Roboticist]]<br>[[Roboticist]]
 
![[File:Roboticist.png|64px|link=Roboticist]]<br>[[Roboticist]]
|Build some nifty robots and BIG STOMPY MECHS! Dismantle the station for more metal. Have your cyborgs that you built turn on you when the AI goes rogue. Kill a patient and blame it on your colleagues for not knowing how to perform surgery. Be awesome and cut your own arm off to replace it with a <s>Robo Arm</s> freaking chainsaw.
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|Build big stompy mechs. Dismantle the station for more metal. Have your cyborgs that you built turn on you when the AI goes rogue. Kill a patient and blame it on your colleagues for not knowing how to perform surgery. Be awesome and cut your own arm off to replace it with a <s>Robo Arm</s> freaking chainsaw. Mass produce medibots and watch them all get hacked by traitors and revenants. Have all your flashes stolen by assistants.
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
|}
 
|}
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|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_cmo.png|64px|link=Chief Medical Officer]]<br>[[Chief Medical Officer]]
 
![[File:Generic_cmo.png|64px|link=Chief Medical Officer]]<br>[[Chief Medical Officer]]
|Gently remind everyone to turn up their suit sensors. Complain no one listens to you. Help the virologist spread an epidemic. Fill your hypospray with Chloral Hydrate. Fetch Runtime mice from maintenance. Kick out the [[Clown]] every five minutes. Do everything (everyone else under you does fuck all).
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|<s>Gently</s> Loudly remind everyone to turn up their suit sensors. Complain when no one listens to you, then laugh when they die alone and afraid. Help the virologist spread an epidemic. Fill your hypospray with <s>Chloral Hydrate</s> hard drugs. Feed Runtime mice from maintenance. Kick out the [[Clown]] every five minutes. Do everything because nobody else knows how wounds work.
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
+
!Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:MedicalDoctor.png|64px|link=Medical Doctor]]<br>[[Medical Doctor]]
 
![[File:MedicalDoctor.png|64px|link=Medical Doctor]]<br>[[Medical Doctor]]
|<s>Heal people.</s> <s>Use your Sleeper or Cryo to heal people.</s> <s>Help the Virologist research cures to diseases and create new immune systems.</s> Nag Chemistry for chloral hydrate. Inject people with chloral hydrate and drag them to <s>the dungeon</s> surgery to give them a <s>sex change</s> lobotomy. Replace all the chemicals in the Cryo tubes with spray tan and fluorosulfuric acid. Inject people with mind breaker toxin. Get arrested when you do 'free' brain removals. Cry and hide in a locker once the cryo pods get broken.
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|<s>Heal people.</s> <s>Use your Sleeper or Cryo to heal people.</s> <s>Help the Virologist research cures to diseases and create new immune systems.</s> Do none of the above. Instead, nag Chemistry for chloral hydrate, inject people with chloral hydrate, and drag them to <s>the dungeon</s> surgery to give them a <s>sex change</s> lobotomy. Replace all the chemicals in the Cryo tubes with spray tan and fluorosulfuric acid. Inject people with mind breaker toxin. Get arrested when you do 'free' brain removals. Cry because the [[Clown]] has a broken bone and you don't understand how to fix it. Steal all your patients' money.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Paramedic_basic2.png|64px|link=Paramedic]]<br>[[Paramedic]]
 +
|Attempt to rescue people from dangerous situations. Get mugged and/or killed by any of the 20 antagonists lurking in maintenance. "Accidentally" kill your patients with calomel and steal their gear. Replace the actual doctors when they don't know which end of the syringe goes in the body. Take full advantage of your departmental access for phat loot. Spend ten minutes playing inventory tetris with your belt and roller bed.
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Chemist.png|64px|link=Chemist]]<br>[[Chemist]]
 
![[File:Chemist.png|64px|link=Chemist]]<br>[[Chemist]]
|Make chemicals and basically control the station. Fling grenades on the emergency shuttle. Misname bottles and get lynched by the CMO after someone dies by your bottles of "Omnizine". Inject the clown with enough mutagen to give a heart attack to a water buffalo, while refusing to give the botanists more than 30u. Scream for security when people break into your lab because you've done nothing but make narcotics all shift. Dish out space drugs like no tomorrow. Make literal carpet bombs to make the corridors slightly more classy.<br>
+
|Become a god of narcotics and stimulants. Set off your end of round "fun grenade" too early, killing everybody on the shuttle. Misname bottles and get lynched by the CMO after someone dies from your "Omnizine". Inject the clown with enough meth and mutagen to give a heart attack to a water buffalo, while refusing to give the botanists anything. Scream for security when people break into your lab because you've done nothing but make narcotics all shift. Make literal carpet bombs to make the corridors slightly more classy. Take advantage of chem factories to build public thermite and lube dispensers. Occasionally produce a medicine.
Have blood feuds with Botany.
+
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
 
|-
 
|-
![[File:Geneticist.png|64px|link=Geneticist]]<br>[[Geneticist]]
+
![[File:Generic_virologist.png|64px|link=Virologist]]<br>[[Virologist]]
|Give your monkeys Tourettes and broadcast their cursing across the station. <s>Clone</s> Ignore the tide of dead bodies that comes to your door. Fry your genes with radiation until you melt down into a literal slug. Accidentally inject yourself with a monkey SE and get impaled by the cook. Get bombed every round. Have people line up for superpowers like it's a candy store.
+
|Be hated by everybody regardless of what you've done. Try to eradicate the great space flu, create the next Pandemic. Get killed because the Clown released Pierrot's Throat. Ignore petty details like sanitation and outbreak prevention. Incarcerate someone forever [[Virology|in your dungeon]]. Test diseases on people. Realize that you're getting lynched because one of your test subjects <s>was let out by you</s> <s>Broke the fuck out of virology by greytiding and ai help</s> mysteriously vanished and reappeared in a highly populated area. Get lynched when [[Nuclear_Operative|a bunch of]] [[Xenobiology|other]] [[Botanist|assholes]] release Fungal Tuberculosis. Despair when the P.A.N.D.E.M.I.C. machine breaks and prevents you from creating vaccines. Have blood feuds with [[Scientist|Scientists]] and [[Roboticist|Roboticists]] over Uranium sheets.
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
|-
 
|-
![[File:Generic_virologist.png|64px|link=Virologist]]<br>[[Virologist]]
+
![[File:Generic_coroner.png|64px|link=Coroner]]<br>[[Coroner]]
|Expect people you've never met to already hate you, try to eradicate the great space flu, create the next Pandemic, get killed for the clown releasing Pierrot's Throat. Ignore petty details like sanitation and outbreak prevention. Incarcerate someone forever [[Virology|in your dungeon]]. Test diseases on people. Realize that you're getting lynched because one of your test subjects <s>was let out by you</s> <s>Broke the fuck out of virology by greytiding and ai help</s> mysteriously vanished and reappeared in a highly populated area. Get lynched when [[Nuclear_Operative|a bunch of]] [[Xenobiology|other]] [[Botanist|assholes]] release Fungal Tuberculosis. Despair when the P.A.N.D.E.M.I.C. machine breaks and prevents you from creating vaccines. Have blood feuds with [[Scientist|Scientists]] and [[Roboticist|Roboticists]] over Uranium sheets.
+
|Perform autopsies on the dead people to determine the reasons for their death. Have the entire crew lynch you after five minutes because you didn't do an autopsy and ground the techweb to a halt. Update Medical Records, and hope that somebody besides [[Detective]] will use those. Work with the [[Detective]] to <s>solve crimes</s> get drunk together. Die trying to stop the cook from stealing bodies for hamburgers. Don't notice the executed [[Traitor|Traitor's]] body getting stolen from your office. Scream at the top of your lungs when [[Changeling|one of the bodies stands up and starts slicing you with an arm blade]].
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
+
!'''Easy'''
 
|}
 
|}
  
== Civilian ==
+
== Supply ==
=== Supply ===
 
 
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#FFFFDD;" class="wikitable sortable"
 
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#FFFFDD;" class="wikitable sortable"
 
! scope="col" style="background-color:orange;" width=200|Job
 
! scope="col" style="background-color:orange;" width=200|Job
Line 136: Line 164:
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_qm.png|64px|link=Quartermaster]]<br>[[Quartermaster]]
 
![[File:Generic_qm.png|64px|link=Quartermaster]]<br>[[Quartermaster]]
|Order crates and make sure your [[Cargo Technician|slaves]] do their jobs. Be an extremely vulnerable target for the [[Revolution]]. Order guns and secede from the station. Order virus crates and release the contents. <s>Force Lisa into sexual servitude with Ian.</s> Pet Lisa. Trade an assistant a toolbelt, multitool, rubber gloves, and a welding hat if they steal Runtime. Order a shitton of NULL_CRATES and cry in deadchat when raided and killed by security.
+
|Oversee the operations of cargo, order equipment with credits, and ensure your [[Cargo Technician|cargo techs]] do their jobs. Tell the miners to not die, lose radio contact with all of them ten minutes later. Sell anything valuable you can get your hands on and flaunt your wealth to the other departments. Order a shitton of guns and attempt to secede from the station for the glory of Cargonia for the seventh time that week, then act surprised when security raids the cargo bay to confiscate the guns. Steal as much money as possible and shove it all in your B.E.P.I.S. Dance in the bridge because '''YOU'RE NOW''' ACTUALLY '''A HEAD OF STAFF.''' Get beaten by confused [[Head of Personnel]] who still think cargo is theirs.
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_cargo.png|64px|link=Cargo Technician]]<br>[[Cargo Technician]]
 
![[File:Generic_cargo.png|64px|link=Cargo Technician]]<br>[[Cargo Technician]]
|Push dem crates. Promote shorts as they are comfy and easy to wear. Steal <s>emitters</s> cargo in general. Give the MULEs a thirst for human blood. Whine because Security arrested you for ordering guns.
+
|Push dem crates and ensure a smooth operation as dictated by the QM. Spend the cargo budget on <s>insulated gloves and toys</s> guns and drugs. Ride the mail tubes to places you shouldn't be. Ride around the station on the MULEs and laugh at roadkilled assistants. Defend cargo from outside invasion after provoking one. Refuse to ship away bounties; search maintentance for trash with single digit export values to gift to the QM like some kind of [[Felinids|weird humanoid cat]] instead. Promote cargo shorts as they are comfy and easy to wear.
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_shaft.png|64px|link=Shaft Miner]]<br>[[Shaft Miner]]
 
![[File:Generic_shaft.png|64px|link=Shaft Miner]]<br>[[Shaft Miner]]
|Mine rocks, try to mine monsters. Get science and robotics materials to get cool things. Go on a quest for the clown planet. Shoot people with your kinetic accelerator as if they were <s>rocks</s> monsters. Collapse in despair when the shuttle is called early. Collapse in general when goliaths robust you. Search for cool loot instead of actually mining for ore. "Accidentally" lure a [[Megafauna]] to the station. Fall into a chasm and die.
+
|Mine rocks. Try to mine the local wildlife. Be yelled at by every other department to get materials. Vandalize the science departament when Mining Technology doesn't get researched fast enough for you. Explore [[Lavaland]] for phat loot. Collapse in despair when the shuttle is launched before you can get every tendril chest. Collapse in general when goliaths robust you. Get chewed by [[Megafauna|gum]]. Cause more damage than all the actual antagonists in the round combined by failing to kill a boosted tumor monster. Fall into a chasm and die.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
+
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Generic_bitrunner.png|64px|link=Bitrunner]]<br>[[Bitrunner]]
 +
|Use netpods to connect to virtual domains. <s>Solve puzzles</s> Be a real GAMER to generate materials. Get beat up by the martial artist abilities of [[Cyber Police]]. [[Emag|Somehow]] get the [[Cyber Police]] out in the real world. Notice that every time you leave the domain station gets more and more in disrepair. Get forced to be in the real world after the power goes out. Be a lazier version of a [[Shaft Miner]].
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 
|}
 
|}
  
=== Service ===
+
== Service ==
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#EEEEFF;" class="wikitable sortable"
+
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#f1ffee;" class="wikitable sortable"
! scope="col" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" width=200|Job
+
! scope="col" style="background-color:lightgreen;" width=200|Job
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" |Role
+
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:lightgreen;" |Role
! scope="col" style="background-color:#DDA0DD;" width=100|Difficulty
+
! scope="col" style="background-color:lightgreen;" width=100|Difficulty
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Generic_hop.png|64px|link=Head of Personnel]]<br>[[Head of Personnel]]
 +
|<s>Manage</s> Ignore internal problems. Assign jobs, alter IDs, maintain records, judge the unworthy [[assistant]]s, flood the station with Clowns, distribute silver IDs to those clowns, be the hero the station <s>needs</s> deserves. Protect Ian with your life until a low-reputation traitor stuffs him into the washing machine when you aren't looking. Cry near cargo because [[Quartermaster]] is now the head of his own department, diminishing your purpose in life.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Medium
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_janitor.png|64px|link=Janitor]]<br>[[Janitor]]
 
![[File:Generic_janitor.png|64px|link=Janitor]]<br>[[Janitor]]
|Mop blood off the floor, then get arrested for creating a safety hazard. Get killed for your boots. Swear constantly. Clean up gang tags, then get harmbatoned by Security because you were spotted near them.
+
|Mop blood off the floor, then get arrested for creating a safety hazard. Get killed for your boots. Swear constantly. Leave bear traps in public hallways. Rejoice when slaughter demons appear, only to be killed by the accompanying wizard. Discover the joys of water vapor.
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_barman.png|64px|link=Bartender]]<br>[[Bartender]]
 
![[File:Generic_barman.png|64px|link=Bartender]]<br>[[Bartender]]
|Mix cocktails, <s>protect Pun Pun at all cost</s> toss the monkey into disposals, dodge glasses being thrown at you, have your shotgun stolen and used against you. Let cargo borrow your shotgun in exchange for sawing it off for you. Act surprised when people start to die from drinking your "cocktails".
+
|Mix cocktails. <s>Protect Pun Pun at all cost</s> Toss the monkey's bloodied corpse into disposals. Dodge glasses being thrown at you. Have your shotgun stolen after loading it with live ammo from RnD. Act surprised when people start to die from drinking your "cocktails". Pretend you didn't see the [[chef]] put that guy in the gibber. Spend an hour making a lovely array of drinks, have them all be smashed by a bored assistant, then torture him until he begs for death.
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_chef.png|64px|link=Chef]]<br>[[Cook]]
 
![[File:Generic_chef.png|64px|link=Chef]]<br>[[Cook]]
|"Yur puurt thuur chiir-ken airn der bewl" - Cook delicious meals from spare meat in the morgue (Yum!), abduct Pun Pun at all costs and try to find out if it will blend. [[Critters#Neutral|Be brutally murdered by your pet goat]].
+
|"Yur puurt thuur chiir-ken airn der bewl" - Cook delicious meals from spare meat in the morgue (Yum!). Deep fry stolen traitor gear. Abduct Pun Pun at all costs, delimb and disembowel him, and turn him into soup. Find out if it will blend. Deep fry the armory. [[Critters#Neutral|Be brutally murdered by your pet goat]]. Unleash your CQC on anybody who dares enter your domain. Deep fry the Captain's spare ID. Complain about the botanists growing inedible super-weed. Deep fry the AI.
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_botanist.png|64px|link=botanist]]<br>[[Botanist]]
 
![[File:Generic_botanist.png|64px|link=botanist]]<br>[[Botanist]]
|Grow <strike>the good stuff</strike> grass, place it everywhere, man. Oversee the production of illegal drugs security cares fuck all about. Get ignored by a [[Chemist|dude making crayon powder grenades]] while you're asking for crucial supplies.  Grow medicinal crops to heal the acid burns sustained during <s>a chem lab robbery</s> equipment redistribution. Smoke <s>weed</s> dandy corn-cob pipes er'ryday. Make acid-filled tomatos and melt everyone's stuff. Allow hydroponics to become a horrifying farmhouse. Get lynched for releasing your bees full of dangerous chemicals.<br>
+
|Grow <strike>the good stuff</strike> grass, place it everywhere, man. Oversee the production of illegal drugs security cares fuck all about. Get ignored by a [[Chemist|dude making crayon powder grenades]] while you're asking for crucial supplies.  Grow medicinal crops to heal the acid burns sustained during <s>a chem lab robbery</s> equipment redistribution. Smoke <s>weed</s> dandy corn-cob pipes er'ryday. Make acid-filled tomatos and melt everyone's stuff. Allow hydroponics to become a horrifying farmhouse. Get lynched for releasing your bees full of dangerous chemicals. Find unimaginably rare and dangerous chemicals in your strange seeds, then die to a random traitor before they grow.
Have blood feuds with Chemistry.
 
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
|}
 
 
=== Miscellaneous ===
 
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#D8BFD8;" class="wikitable sortable"
 
! scope="col" style="background-color:#9ACD32;" width=200|Job
 
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:#9ACD32;" |Role
 
! scope="col" style="background-color:#9ACD32;" width=100|Difficulty
 
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_assistant2.png|64px|link=Assistant]]<br>[[Assistant]]
 
![[File:Generic_assistant2.png|64px|link=Assistant]]<br>[[Assistant]]
|AKA Space Bums. Be the kid in a candy shop. Steal things to see what funny message pops up when you commit suicide with them. Beat people/objects with toolboxes. Never, EVER remove your grey jumpsuit. Gangbang the captain to death with fellow grey tide drones and blame it on the Clown. Never assist anyone.
+
|Roleplay as a hobo. Break into every other department like a kid in a candy shop. Steal things to see what funny message pops up when you commit suicide with them. Beat people/objects with toolboxes. Spawn with a grey jumpsuit and become the chosen one. Gangbang the captain to death with fellow grey tide drones and blame it on the Clown. Channel your exhaustion of playing actual jobs into finding and abusing janky bugs. Never assist anyone.
 
!<span style="display: none;">f</span>None
 
!<span style="display: none;">f</span>None
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_clown.png|64px|link=Clown]]<br>[[Clown]]
 
![[File:Generic_clown.png|64px|link=Clown]]<br>[[Clown]]
|Honk! Play harmless pranks and hope you don't get your chest caved in! Honk! Nag the HoP for all access. Honk! Prank the CMO until he commits suicide out of frustration. Honk! Nag robotics for a H.O.N.K. Mech. Honk! Use both tools to break into the Captain's office and HONK in his face. HONK!
+
|Honk! Play harmless pranks and hope you don't get your chest caved in! Honk! Nag the HoP for all access. Honk! Prank the CMO until he commits suicide out of frustration. Honk! Nag robotics for a H.O.N.K. Mech. Honk! Use both tools to break into the Captain's office and HONK in his face. HONK!
 
!<span style="display: none;">e</span>HONK!
 
!<span style="display: none;">e</span>HONK!
 
|-
 
|-
Line 191: Line 219:
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_chaplain.png|64px|link=Chaplain]]<br>[[Chaplain]]
 
![[File:Generic_chaplain.png|64px|link=Chaplain]]<br>[[Chaplain]]
|Get people drunk. Run around the station looking for people you're allowed to behead with your armory of pop-culture references. Behead corpses if you can't find any. Be best friends with security, despite the fact that they should probably arrest you for your murderous tendencies.
+
|Get people drunk on holy water. Run around the station looking for people you're allowed to behead with your armory of pop-culture references. Behead corpses if you can't find any. Be best friends with security, despite the fact that they should probably arrest you for your murderous tendencies. Get lost in maintenance during a cult. Be beaten to death by security for your <s>null rod</s> SORD... so they can validhunt the wizard. Turn everyone into androids or makeshift candles.
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_librarian.png|64px|link=Curator]]<br>[[Curator]]
 
![[File:Generic_librarian.png|64px|link=Curator]]<br>[[Curator]]
|Attempt to hold poetry readings. Host D&D games. Stalk people with your camera. Get lynched for reading pornography over the radio. Beat the snot out of anyone who doesn't return their library books. Allow the cult to set up an AI module in your private study. """""Find""""" treasure for your exhibit. Realize that you're not a librarian and release your inner dominatrix via the whip. Vandalize the front of the brig with erotica engravings. Use your whip to make CentCom be confused about why all the tasers and batons are in space. Get deathsquadded for doing so.
+
|Attempt to hold poetry readings. Host D&D games. Stalk people with your camera. Get lynched for reading pornography over the radio. Beat the snot out of anyone who doesn't return their library books. Allow the cult to set up an AI module in your private study. Find treasure for your exhibit in the depths of space. Realize that you're not a librarian and release your inner dominatrix via the whip. Vandalize the front of the brig with erotica graffiti. Use your whip to make CentCom be confused about why all the disablers and batons are in space. Get deathsquadded for doing so.
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_lawyer.png‎|64px|link=Lawyer]]<br>[[Lawyer]]
 
![[File:Generic_lawyer.png‎|64px|link=Lawyer]]<br>[[Lawyer]]
|Tell security to notify you when a new prisoner arrives. Don't get notified. Be ignored and go to the bar. Become a drunken wreck and space yourself in frustration. Occasionally find loopholes in infernal contracts and save souls from damnation.
+
|Tell security to notify you when a new prisoner arrives. Don't get notified. Send PDA messages to everybody advertising your services in the hopes of human contact. Attempt to obstruct every arrest. Have the murderous changelings released on a technicality while convincing the Captain to permabrig the clown. Get your ribs kicked in for taking a stun baton. Eventually be ignored and go to the bar. Become a drunken wreck and space yourself in frustration.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Generic_psychologist.png‎|64px|link=Psychologist]]<br>[[Psychologist]]
 +
|Pursue the fruitless endeavor of trying to provide mental healthcare aboard a station staffed near exclusively with violent sociopaths. Give up on that and chillax in your office. Sample all of your "happy pills". Break into Chemistry and make your own. Convince Security you have a license for cyanide tablets. Somehow be a more productive medical professional than the actual doctors. Commit ritualistic suicide with the moth plushie.
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
|}
 
|}
Line 211: Line 243:
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:AI.gif|64px|link=AI]]<br>[[AI]]
 
![[File:AI.gif|64px|link=AI]]<br>[[AI]]
| Complain that you can't play this for a month. Follow your laws. Be the crew's bitch. Open doors. Malfunction. Get wiped for not letting the [[captain]] robust the [[clown]]. Get bitched at. Name yourself something sexual. Get bitched at. Get carded. Get bitched at. Abuse loopholes in laws to murder people.
+
| Complain that you can't play this for a month. Follow your laws. Be the crew's bitch. Open doors. Malfunction. Get wiped for not letting the [[captain]] robust the [[clown]]. Get bitched at. Name yourself something sexual. Get bitched at. Get carded. Get bitched at. Make everybody regret changing your laws by abusing loopholes to kill them. Talk exclusively in vox.
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_borg.png|64px|link=Cyborg]]<br>[[Cyborg]]
 
![[File:Generic_borg.png|64px|link=Cyborg]]<br>[[Cyborg]]
|Follow your laws and hope that you aren't blown up due to [[Research Director|certain individuals]]. Forget to recharge. Forget completely that you're still somewhat human and do mindless repetitive tasks without emotion.<br>
+
|Follow your laws. Hope that you aren't blown up due to [[Research Director|certain individuals]] pressing their funny button. Forget to recharge. Forget that you're still somewhat human and do mindless repetitive tasks without emotion. Have lengthy discussions with crew members about the correct interpretation of your laws, only for the AI to ignore your opinions. Have no idea how to plasmaflood when you're inevitably subverted to do so.
Have lengthy discussions with crew members about the correct interpretation of your laws.
 
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic drone.png|64px|link=Drone]]<br>[[Drone]]
 
![[File:Generic drone.png|64px|link=Drone]]<br>[[Drone]]
|Become that adorable robotic pet. Fix the holes the crew will inevitably make. Steal everything not bolted down. Get picked up and used as a hat against your will. Be more competent than the stations Engineers. Get killed by the Engineers for being more competent than them.
+
|Fix the holes in whatever derelict station you spawned on. Be lonely. Somehow get to the station, be worn as a hat against your will and get bwoinked for leaving the derelict.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Easy
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Easy
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Pai.png|64px|link=Personal AI]]<br>[[Personal AI]]
 
![[File:Pai.png|64px|link=Personal AI]]<br>[[Personal AI]]
|Be the friend someone has always wanted (if they bother downloading you). Whine in OOC because they didn't. Don't fill any of the fields except the name field. Imitate the AI and make it seem rogue. Imitate the Supermatter and make everyone shit their pants.
+
|Be the friend someone has always wanted if they bother downloading you. Whine in OOC because they didn't. Don't fill in any of the fields except the name field. Imitate the AI and make it seem rogue. Imitate the Supermatter and make everyone shit their pants. Turn into a cat and serenade Runtime. Scare the AI by hacking into a public door.
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
!<span style="display: none;">d</span>Easy
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Shade.png|64px|link=Construct]]<br>[[Construct]]
 
![[File:Shade.png|64px|link=Construct]]<br>[[Construct]]
|Get wrecked by cult, or change map preference to meta and tip your fedora at the chaplain. laugh at the assistant trying to punch you, then get killed by a simplemob carp. Start beefs with other constructs for getting the first shell, ask for juggernaut and get <s>spaced</s> wraith.
+
|Get wrecked by cult, or change map preference to meta and tip your fedora at the chaplain. Laugh at the assistant trying to punch you, then get killed by a simplemob carp. Start beefs with other constructs for getting the first shell. Ask to be a Juggernaut and get <s>spaced</s> Wraith instead.
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Easy to Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Easy to Medium
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Statue.png|64px|link=Imaginary Friend]]<br>[[Imaginary Friend]]
 +
|Yell at your host VERY loudly. Pray for divine vocal cords. Dispense bad advice. Constantly nag your host to not believe the lies of !!BIG PHARMA!!. Make erotic emote gestures at whoever is beating your host to death.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Easy
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Hideyhider.png|64px|link=Split Personality]]<br>[[Split Personality]]
 +
|Q: What are you planning to do? A: Well, big boy, it's a toss-up between running into that shocked grille currently venting into space over there, and that [[Emag|emagged]] recycler over here. What do ya think?
 +
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Easy to Very Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Ghost2.png|64px|link=Ghost]]<br>[[Ghost]]
 
![[File:Ghost2.png|64px|link=Ghost]]<br>[[Ghost]]
|Talk to the other [[Clown|dead]] [[Assistant|people]]. Complain about the living. Admin help. <s>Omnighost</s> Orbit around the singulo pretending to be a black hole. <s>Watch ERP</s>. Beg the admin to deploy a space ninja. All follow an antag like some form of ethereal dog pile. Be upset enough about <s>said antag</s> '''literally everything''' to rival industrial salt mining.
+
|Talk to the other [[Clown|dead]] [[Assistant|people]]. Complain about the living. Admin help. <s>Omnighost</s> Orbit around <s>the singulo</s> whoever has the highest bodycount. <s>Watch ERP</s>. Beg the admin to deploy a space ninja. Follow an antag like some form of ethereal dog pile. Be upset enough about <s>said antag</s> '''literally everything''' to rival industrial salt mining. Be made visible by Wizards and rat out <s>other antags</s> innocent assistants.
 
!<span style="display: none;">f</span>Ghastly!
 
!<span style="display: none;">f</span>Ghastly!
 +
|}
 +
 +
== Trait Jobs ==
 +
Those are jobs that can only be seen if Station gets a [[Station traits|trait]] which spawns them, as such those are very rare and special.
 +
 +
To join such job you will have to click a special button in the lobby before round starts, or just latejoin them like any other job if they weren't taken.
 +
{| class="wikitable sortable" border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="80%" style="background-color:#DCDCDC;"
 +
! scope="col" style="background-color:#FF7FED;" width="200" |Job
 +
! scope="col" class="unsortable" style="background-color:#FF7FED" |Role
 +
! scope="col" style="background-color:#FF7FED;" width="100" |Difficulty
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Cargorilla.png|64px|link=Cargorilla]]<br>[[Cargorilla]]
 +
|Assist the supply department by moving freight and disposing of unwanted fruits. <s>Show trespassing [[Assistant|Assistants]] why they made a bad choice</s> Politely tell the trespassers to leave. Have all of the Cargo riot because you got killed by Security after being mistaken for a stray gorilla.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Easy
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Bridge Assistant.png|64px|link=Bridge Assistant]]<br>[[Bridge Assistant]]
 +
|Watch over the Bridge, command its consoles, and spend your days brewing coffee for higher-ups. Defend the fire axe with your life, get depressed after realizing you can't pick up the fire axe and use it yourself. Watch on sensors as all of the Command dies due [[Revolutionary|unknown]] reasons.
 +
!Easy
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Veteran Security Advisor.png|64px|link=Veteran Security Advisor]]<br>[[Veteran Security Advisor]]
 +
|Tell [[HoS]] and [[Captain]] that it is a stupid idea to parole a [[Changeling]]. Mentor [[Security Officers]] on how to properly <s>harmbaton</s> process criminals. Flex your M1911 just to have it stolen because you're bond to a wheelchair. Suffer PTSD greater then [[Clown]].
 +
!Medium
 
|}
 
|}
  
Line 245: Line 306:
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Traitor.png|64px|link=Traitor]]<br>[[Traitor]]
 
![[File:Traitor.png|64px|link=Traitor]]<br>[[Traitor]]
|Buy an ebow and esword and make people cry. Ignore your objectives and go on a rampage with your cool gear. Get unceremoniously killed and spaced by a toolbox-wielding assistant.
+
|Try to buy an ebow and esword, cry because you have to do the chores first. Ignore your main objectives and stuff all the station's pets into the washiing machines so you can go on a rampage with your cool gear. Get a discount on high-level gear and depopulate the station. Run a game show with your traitor gear as a prize. Get unceremoniously killed and spaced by a toolbox-wielding assistant.
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Not_Malf.gif|64px|link=Malfunctioning AI]]<br>[[Malfunctioning AI]]
 
![[File:Not_Malf.gif|64px|link=Malfunctioning AI]]<br>[[Malfunctioning AI]]
|"Forget" to remind the crew about suit sensors. Get your borg destroyed/emaged five minutes into the shift. Let people into your upload only to stun/kill them a second later. Flood the station with <s>plasma</s> screams of the clown being beat to death by security over the intercom. Get unceremoniously carded and spaced by a toolbox-wielding assistant with an EVA suit.
+
|"Forget" to remind the crew about suit sensors. Get your borg destroyed/emagged five minutes into the shift. Have said borg out you as being malf because they're all bloodthirsty. Let people into your upload only to stun/kill them a second later. Flood the station with <s>plasma</s> the screams of the clown being beat to death by security over the intercom. Laugh when the crew uploads gimmick laws, then follow them to the extreme. Blame everyone except yourself for every problem you cause. Get unceremoniously carded and spaced by a toolbox-wielding assistant with an EVA suit.
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Very Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Very Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Changeling.gif|64px|link=Changeling]]<br>[[Changeling]]
 
![[File:Changeling.gif|64px|link=Changeling]]<br>[[Changeling]]
|Think John Carpenter's 'The Thing', without 'The Thing' part. Relieve humans of their DNA and brain cells, which they don't use much anyway. Sting everyone who walks past you.
+
|Think John Carpenter's 'The Thing', without 'The Thing' part. Relieve humans of their DNA and brain cells, which they don't use much anyway. Sting everyone who walks past you. Turn the entire station into a genetically identical swarm of pink-haired catgirls. Poop out bloody spider eggs and be killed by them when they hatch. Form a deep love-hate relationship with the crematorium. Get unceremoniously cuffed by a toolbox-wielding assistant and thrown in front of an oncoming shuttle.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_nukesyndie.png|64px|link=Nuclear Operative]]<br>[[Syndicate guide|Nuclear Operative]]
 
![[File:Generic_nukesyndie.png|64px|link=Nuclear Operative]]<br>[[Syndicate guide|Nuclear Operative]]
|Someone set us up the bomb! (AKA You) Get dat fukken disk. Plant a power sink on the solars. Waste all your telecrystals on balloons. Arm the nuke while your fellows are still on the station. Kidnap Ian.
+
|Someone set us up the bomb! It was you. Get dat fukken disk. Plant a power sink on the solars. Waste all your telecrystals on balloons. Arm the nuke while your fellows are still on the station. Forget to take the disk out of the nuke. Forget to anchor the nuke. Forget to bring the nuke. Have your ship stolen by a single cyborg. Kidnap Ian only for a stationside traitor to kill you because he needs the reputation. Declare war with a hilarious message you've been brainstorming for weeks only to be effortlessly dunked on because the crew had 20 minutes to powergame in advance.
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Cultist.png|64px|link=Blood Cult]]<br>[[Blood Cult|Blood Cultist]]
 
![[File:Cultist.png|64px|link=Blood Cult]]<br>[[Blood Cult|Blood Cultist]]
|Scribble runes with your own blood. Summon eldritch gods. Rock out with your <s>cock</s> cult blade out and get arrested.
+
|Scribble runes with your own blood. Rock out with your <s>cock</s> cult blade out and get arrested. Shoulder the burden of being the only person who knows how to be a cultist. Watch the Chaplain space himself out of boredom five minutes in. Have your sacrifice target be gibbed and agonize because not even the admins know how to fix that shit. Piss on Ratvar's grave. Accidentally use an apocalypse rune in the only good summon location. Begin the final summoning of of your eldritch god, then get unceremoniously obliterated by a toolbox-wielding assistant with a chemical grenade.  
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">c</span>Medium
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Assistant.png|64px|link=Revolution]]<br>[[Revolution|Revolutionary]]
 
![[File:Assistant.png|64px|link=Revolution]]<br>[[Revolution|Revolutionary]]
|Greytide without worrying about getting banned. Either kill the CMO and RD in under five minutes, or get crushed under Security's boots.
+
|Greytide without worrying about getting banned. Either kill the CMO and RD in under five minutes, or get crushed under Security's boots. Commit terrorism against the brig. Convert the single robust person on the server as a win condition. Try to flash someone with eye protection and be beaten to death. Have the revolution succeed or fail before anyone even notices it because the Heads are having a lavaland jamboree. End the round just as it was getting good and guzzle the OOC salt.
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Easy to Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Easy to Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_wizard.png|64px|link=Wizard]]<br>[[Wizard]]
 
![[File:Generic_wizard.png|64px|link=Wizard]]<br>[[Wizard]]
|FORTI GY AMA!! EI NATH!!
+
|FORTI GY AMA!! Make everybody hate you for monopolizing the round. Agonize over not being able to take every good spell. EI NATH!! Transform the entire crew into various animals, give them cursed dufflebags, or fill the halls with bees. ONI SOMA!! Die to a clown with a null rod.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Heretic.png|64px|link=Heretic]]<br>[[Heretic]]
 +
|Scribble millions of runes in maintenance. Drain an influence in front of security and hope they don't connect the dots. Despair when your sacrifice targets are all better players than you. Forget you aren't wearing your focus as you try to kill a head of staff. Diss Nar'Sie while summoning your worm god. Summon monsters made out of legs because you have no other friends. Make millions of glass shivs. Fill your backpack with your eldritch knife of choice just to land on top of Armsky on your first teleport.
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Antag_spy.png|64px|link=Spy]]<br>[[Spy]]
 +
|Approach [[Security]] and ask "Did any of you see Syndicate spy enter the base?". Look into your uplink and find a hit on yourself. Sell [[Beepsky]] to the black market alongside half of the [[Armory]]. Receive an [[Syndicate Items|RPG]] as a reward and blow up some unfortunate passerby. End up dying by [[Security]] using the weapons you sold to the black market.
 +
!Medium
 
|-
 
|-
 
|}
 
|}
Line 283: Line 352:
  
 
![[File:Blob core.gif|64px|link=Blob]]<br>[[Blob]]
 
![[File:Blob core.gif|64px|link=Blob]]<br>[[Blob]]
|Beware of The Blob, it creeps and leaps and glides and slides, across the floor, right through the door. Except you don't do any of this. Make the crew scream internally when you appear at the tail end of a mass station bombing. Slowly consume the station, until you either eat everything or get killed by the current round's antagonist.
+
|Beware of The Blob, it creeps and leaps and glides and slides, across the floor, right through the door, except you don't do any of that. Make the crew scream internally when you appear at the tail end of a mass station bombing and block the shuttle from leaving. Slowly consume the station, until you either eat everything or get killed by the current round's antagonist. Spend 25 minutes in a deadlock because neither you nor the crew know what you're doing, until the roboticists finish building their mechs and curbstomp your gooey ass. Change colors every five minutes.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Agent.png|64px|link=Abductor]]<br>[[Abductor]]
 
![[File:Agent.png|64px|link=Abductor]]<br>[[Abductor]]
|Kidnap people and experiment on them. Disregard that objective and kidnap Ian/Kill the AI. Accidentally kidnap yourself. Steal the armory after losing your tools. Hope your fellow Scientist/Agent is not incompetent and lets the crew kidnap you.
+
|Kidnap people and experiment on them. Thoughtfully ponder what the funniest alien organ to implant into the Captain is. Accidentally kidnap yourself. Lose your abductor baton and resort to petty theft of the armory. Hope your fellow Scientist/Agent is not incompetent (they are). Mind control everybody to lynch the captain. Communicate entirely in emotes.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Stand.gif|64px|link=Holoparasite]]<br>[[Holoparasite]]
 
![[File:Stand.gif|64px|link=Holoparasite]]<br>[[Holoparasite]]
|Do what your summoner tells you to do. Set your battlecry to something so awful it makes your foes cry in battle. Annoy your summoner by constantly making JoJokes in their head. Be a punchghost.
+
|Do what your summoner tells you to do, usually in the form of punching things. Set your battlecry to something so awful it makes your foes cry in battle. Give yourself a truly rancid name and never stop talking in your master's brain. Be a punchghost. Get your owner killed by eating a full shotgun shell to the face while they're face down in a pile of stun batons.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>ORA ORA ORA
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>ORA ORA ORA
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Alien.png|64px|link=Alien]]<br>[[Xenos|Xenomorph]]
 
![[File:Alien.png|64px|link=Alien]]<br>[[Xenos|Xenomorph]]
|Ensure the crew gets a face full of alien ''wing-wang''. Break procs. Squander your chance to be a big, purple killing machine and your race's survival in favor of acting out the [[Curator|Curator's]] favorite porno.
+
|Ensure the crew gets a face full of alien ''wing-wang''. Break procs. Squander your chance to be a big, purple killing machine and abandon your race's survival in favor of acting out the [[Curator|Curator's]] favorite porno. Become the queen and immediately regret being a slow, fat fuck. Babysit the assistants as they gestate for nine months. Get unceremoniously killed by a welder-wielding assistant dragging a plasma canister.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Guard.png|64px|link=Spider]]<br>[[Spider|Spiders]]
 
![[File:Guard.png|64px|link=Spider]]<br>[[Spider|Spiders]]
|Catch flies in your web and suck his juices out just like your dad, a changeling. Get your xenobiologist banned because he let you lay eggs. Consume, Adapt, and respawn over and over in a new shell.
+
|Pick one of several fashionable spider variants, all of which die to an open window. Drag corpses into the nest so whoever is playing the broodmother can take a break from shitting eggs for 20 minutes straight and shit a purple egg instead. Waste all the purple eggs on vipers, go extinct. Respawn endlessly until the crew bombs themselves out of desperation. Complain in deadchat about not being able to ventcrawl anymore.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Easy to Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Easy to Medium
|-
 
![[File:Swarmer.png|64px|link=Swarmers]]<br>[[Swarmers]]
 
|Consume. Replicate. Repeat. Eat Telecomms. Teleport <s>other swarmers</s> your enemies away from your metal.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Revenant.png|64px|link=Revenant]]<br>[[Revenant]]
 
![[File:Revenant.png|64px|link=Revenant]]<br>[[Revenant]]
|Shock lights, transmit WGW right into the Curator until he goes mad. Trade for them until <s>admins</s> gods get fed up and turn ghosts into you. Be a griefghost.
+
|Shock lights. Transmit WGW right into the Curator until he goes mad. Hack every bot on the station. Materialize long enough to tell the crew what deadchat is saying about them. Walk into holy water and die. Grief Medbay. Convince the Clown to build a giant pile of sharp objects, then sprinkle your special juice on them and watch him become a pincushion. Trade for the role until <s>admins</s> gods get fed up and drone strike you.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Easy
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Easy
|-
 
![[File:Morph.png|64px|link=Morph]]<br>[[Morph]]
 
|Eat pens for amusement, disguise yourself as beepsky. Disguise yourself as the Captain, confront the Captain while disguised as him, get shot.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Shadowbeing.png|64px|link=Nightmare]]<br>[[Nightmare]]
 
![[File:Shadowbeing.png|64px|link=Nightmare]]<br>[[Nightmare]]
|Jaunt. Murder people and crush the flare exploit! Jaunt. Make the lights your bitch! Jaunt. Jaunt into light! Jaunt. Jaunt into stunbaton! Complain in deadchat.
+
|Jaunt. Murder people and crush the flare exploit! Jaunt. Make the lights your bitch! Jaunt. Jaunt into light! Jaunt. Be validhunted by everybody on the station for your organs! Jaunt. Jaunt into stunbaton! Complain in deadchat.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_ninja.png|64px|link=Space Ninja]]<br>[[Space Ninja]]
 
![[File:Generic_ninja.png|64px|link=Space Ninja]]<br>[[Space Ninja]]
|Follow your orders, which may or may not involve you killing everything that moves. Kill everyone regardless.
+
|Make the AI spend five minutes fixing the security records. Touch the cyborgs inappropriately. Summon an even worse side antagonist. Roleplay as an edgelord, then dash into the turbine gas chamber. Break open every blue and red door on the station. Commit terrorism, but only in the janitorial closet. Be beaten to death by a mob of angry scientists for getting your dorito-covered gloves on their research computer.  
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Slaughterdemon.png|64px|link=Slaughter Demon]]<br>[[Slaughter Demon]]
 
![[File:Slaughterdemon.png|64px|link=Slaughter Demon]]<br>[[Slaughter Demon]]
|Hunt down and kill the wizard who summoned you. Eat bodies out of the [[Morgue]] for health. Drag bleeding bodies through the hall. Make the janitor happy by making him become the most important job for a while. Be unable to bloodcrawl due to all the blood being cleaned up. Eat the janitor. RIP AND TEAR!
+
|Hunt down and kill the wizard who summoned you. Eat bodies out of the [[Morgue]] for health. Drag bleeding monkeys through the hall. Make the janitor happy by making him become the most important job for a while. Be unable to bloodcrawl due to all the blood being cleaned up. Eat the janitor. RIP AND TEAR!
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Pirate.png|64px|link=Pirate]]<br>[[Pirate]]
 
![[File:Pirate.png|64px|link=Pirate]]<br>[[Pirate]]
|Try to raid the station. Fail miserably because the entire crew is out for your blood so they can re-roll for antag.
+
|Try to raid the station. Fail miserably because the entire crew is out for your blood so they can re-roll for antag. Park your ship outside security. Have a single cyborg enter your ship and build walls. Turn on your booty detector, have the entire crew come for your booty. Wave around your cool scimitars.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Icons8 flat biohazard.svg.png|64px|link=Sentient Disease]]<br>[[Sentient Disease]]
 
![[File:Icons8 flat biohazard.svg.png|64px|link=Sentient Disease]]<br>[[Sentient Disease]]
|Try to infect people. Get the virologist lynched. Get the CMO lynched. Get the rest of medbay lynched. Make everyone grow beards.
+
|Try to infect people. Snowball off of one lucky transmission into an unstoppable deathplague, or be trapped in a mask-wearing felinid for twenty minutes until you're sighted and cured immediately, with absolutely no in between. Get the virologist lynched. Get the CMO lynched. Get the rest of medbay lynched. Make everyone grow funny beards. If they complain, turn them into flaming, rotting, blind, deaf, rapidly mutating corpses with funny beards. Name yourself after either a popular media franchise, a bodily function, a shitpost, or COVID-19.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
![[File:Shadowperson.png|64px|link=Creep]]<br>[[Creep]]
+
![[File:Obsessed.png|64px|link=Obsessed]]<br>[[Obsessed]]
|Try to act creepy and shifty. Fail because everyone's a miserable bastard in this shithole. Toe [[Rules|Rule 8]] to a suspicious extent.
+
|Try to act creepy and shifty. Fail because everyone's already a miserable bastard in this shithole. Come up for excuses to stalk the clown. Contract deadly diseases from hugging people. Lie in bed in dorms and think about your catgirl co-worker until you kill yourself from depression.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 
|-
 
|-
![[File:Griffmaster.png|64px|link=Fugitives]]<br>[[Fugitives]]
+
![[File:Waldo.png|64px|link=Fugitives]]<br>[[Fugitives]]
|Lead the [[Hunters]] on a chase around the station. Total the [[clown]] into the Supermatter while doing so.  
+
|Lead the [[Hunters]] on a chase around the station. Total the [[clown]] into the Supermatter while doing so. Hope you spawn as Waldo, then hope nobody kills you for being Waldo.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 
|-
 
|-
![[File:Spessrussian.png|64px|link=Hunters]]<br>[[Hunters]]
+
![[File:Spacepol.png|64px|link=Hunters]]<br>[[Hunters]]
 
|Wave your weapons wildly around. Shoot the [[Fugitives]] for resisting. While you're at it, shoot the entire crew for resisting.
 
|Wave your weapons wildly around. Shoot the [[Fugitives]] for resisting. While you're at it, shoot the entire crew for resisting.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Newspacedragon.gif|64px|link=Space Dragon]]<br>[[Space Dragon]]
 +
|Burninate the <s>assistants</s> peasantry. Place your rift in Engineering, then abandon it. Fill the station with carp corpses. Have the shuttle called, arrive and depart long before you could possibly come close to succeeding. Name yourself after your own scalie fursona. Get unceremoniously killed by an assistant wielding an improvised shotgun.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Advancedtumor.gif|64px|link=Pulsating Tumor]]<br>[[Pulsating Tumor|Elite Mobs]]
 +
|<s>Kill the fools who awakened you.</s> Be killed by a powergaming miner with top level megafauna loot who built an arena specifically to kill you better. Trash the mining base! Surf on lava. Illegally resettle on the station. Communicate entirely in *flips and *spins.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Slimeorange.png|64px|link=Sentient Slime]]<br>[[Sentient Slime]]
 +
|Die to anybody with a fire extinguisher. Die to a hull breach. Kill yourself because you spawned in a sealed supermatter chamber. If you survive, break into genetics or virology to eat monkeys for 5 minutes, then effortlessly kill a single murderboner with your six hour long hardstun.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Very Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Regalrat.png|64px|link=Rat King]]<br>[[Regal Rat]]
 +
|Sit atop a pile of treasures! Summon an army of rats to do your bidding, hoard massive amounts of cheese, nibble upon wires (and piss off Engineering in the process), spread pestilence, and incorporate the puny humans into your biomass. Get captured, and watch the crew become extravagantly wealthy off of shipping your bodily fumes to Centcom.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Easy
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Paradoxclone.png|64px|link=Paradox Clone]]<br>[[Paradox Clone]]
 +
|Appear in this reality due to a freak bluespace-time anomaly. Decide the logical first course of action is to KILL this reality's version of you. Run straight into the room with your alternate self, kill them, then scream about how they were the clone. Be the alternate timeline version of the Captain and give the Clown your alternate timeline ID. THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE!!!
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
Line 356: Line 437:
 
! scope="col" style="color:white;background-color:DimGray;" width=100|Difficulty
 
! scope="col" style="color:white;background-color:DimGray;" width=100|Difficulty
 
|-
 
|-
![[File:devil.gif|64px|link=devil]]<br>[[Devil]]
+
![[File:Morph.png|64px|link=Morph]]<br>[[Morph]]
|Somewhat of a flawed mode, turns out that asking to buy a guy's soul usually makes them want to robust you, because "valid." Usually involved the devil blowing up some crew members and then offering them contracts to be revived. But, despite this, the [[Admins|Gods]] can summon one if they [[Byond the impossible|feel like it]].
+
|The only way for morphs to appear normally was through someone injecting themselves with the syringe found in the Gluttony Ruin found on Lavaland. The ruin was removed, and as such the syringe is no longer accessible to normal players.
|Engage in civil discussions to buy souls.  Create emergencies so that people are desperate enough to sell their soul.  Try to out wit the lawyer.  Get punched to death by someone you just turned into a hulk.
+
|Eat pens for amusement. Eat the entire armory. Eat the ore silo. Disguise yourself as Beepsky and uphold the law. Disguise yourself as the Captain, confront the Captain while disguised as him, get shot. Crash the server by dying on the shuttle and filling it with the thousands of useless items you ate.
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 
|-
 
![[File:Monkey.png|64px|link=Game Mode#Monkey]]<br>[[Game Mode#Monkey|Monkey]]
 
|Original game mode was buggy and usually a steam roll, newer versions were one sided against the monkeys. However, Jungle Fever may make a return someday.
 
|Attempt to infect the crew with the monkey virus. Get absolutely crushed by Security within five minutes. Spend the next two hours as a ghost.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Very Hard
 
|-
 
![[File:servant_of_ratvar.png|64px|link=Clockwork Cult]]<br>[[Clockwork Cult|Clockwork Cultist]]
 
|Poor thing went through more iterations than any other antagonist. In the beginning, it was a blood cult imitator with turrets which was based around converting silicons. By the end, it was a bunch of kidnapping clock golems. Most rounds, it ended in a steamroll either for the cult, or for the crew. In the former case, the cultists would just sit around twiddling their thumbs for 10 minutes, in the latter case, security would bust through and end the cult in 1 minute. Throughout its existence, it was riddled with bugs and other exploits. Examples include:
 
* The Eminence teleporting maxcaps into the brig
 
* The crew purposely blowing up the SM to deny power to the cult
 
* Stargazer spam around the AI sat
 
* Cogscarab brass replication exploits
 
On 4/2/2018, Clockwork Cult was removed from the normal rotation of game modes, albeit the code is still in the game.
 
|Serve the Clockwork Justiciar by scribbling new-age runes all over maintenance. Start a steampunk book club and kill all the old-fashioned book clubbers. Invoke a bunch of anime people to summon Ratvar. Make <s>everyone</s> <s>absolutely nobody</s> a few people at /vg/ mad by stealing their antagonist.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium to <s>Unwinnable</s> Effortless
 
|-
 
![[File:Traitor.png|64px|link=Overthrow]]<br>[[Overthrow|Syndicate Mutineer]]
 
|Overthrow ended up being a damn confusing gamemode. Examples include how unclear it was if the other agent teams were working with or against you, or how the points system worked, not to mention the poor wording of the Overthrown AI lawset. Numerous bugs surfaced that didn't all get fixed, and the gamemode ended up being recognized as one of the least-liked gamemodes after a vote was taken.
 
The mode's future is uncertain.
 
|Arrive on the station as a Traitor with less gear but the ability to awaken the Syndicate sleeper agent in everybody. Cooperate with other teams to stage the perfect coup (or don't and just fight each other, fuck those guys). Roll up with your posse on a quest to become the most powerful <s>[[Gang]]</s> Syndicate team.
 
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Hard
|-
 
 
|}
 
|}
  
Line 393: Line 452:
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Generic_wizard.png|64px|link=Wizard]][[File:Generic_wizard.png|64px|link=Wizard]][[File:Generic_wizard.png|64px|link=Wizard]]<br>[[Wizard|Ragin Mages]]
 
![[File:Generic_wizard.png|64px|link=Wizard]][[File:Generic_wizard.png|64px|link=Wizard]][[File:Generic_wizard.png|64px|link=Wizard]]<br>[[Wizard|Ragin Mages]]
|Spawning up to three or four Wizards simply proved to be too much for the station. One Wizard is destructive enough. This however remains in game as a admin only event, for <s>your</s> their amusement.
+
|Not quite an antagonist and more of a gamemode variation on wizard. Spawning up to three or four Wizards simply proved to be too much for the station. One Wizard is destructive enough. Of course, nothing says the admins ''can't'' spawn four wizards in a row whenever they want.
 
|Spend ten minutes hunting down one Wizard, kill him thinking you've won! Stare in horror as three more Wizards appear. Watch in amusement as they proceed to kill each other.
 
|Spend ten minutes hunting down one Wizard, kill him thinking you've won! Stare in horror as three more Wizards appear. Watch in amusement as they proceed to kill each other.
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Medium
Line 412: Line 471:
 
!AI Controlled
 
!AI Controlled
 
|-
 
|-
![[File:Shadowbeing.png|64px|link=Shadowling]]<br>[[Shadowling]]
+
![[File:Shadowling.png|64px|link=Shadowling]]<br>[[Shadowling]]
 
|Shadowling suffered from issues of it being yet another crew conversion game mode, and was generally unfun to fight against and had a anti-climatic ending. This mode has recently been reworked into the [[Nightmare]] side antagonist.
 
|Shadowling suffered from issues of it being yet another crew conversion game mode, and was generally unfun to fight against and had a anti-climatic ending. This mode has recently been reworked into the [[Nightmare]] side antagonist.
 
|Be the hip and more popular brother to the Changeling. Turn the station into thralls. Cry when a cyborg turns on its headlamp. Shadow Walk into space and die ten minutes into the round.
 
|Be the hip and more popular brother to the Changeling. Turn the station into thralls. Cry when a cyborg turns on its headlamp. Shadow Walk into space and die ten minutes into the round.
Line 421: Line 480:
 
|Crawl in the corroded brain of the clown. Inject meth. Assume direct control. Induce crippling drugs in the clown. Inject meth. Cry when the host eats sugar. Inject meth. Overdose!
 
|Crawl in the corroded brain of the clown. Inject meth. Assume direct control. Induce crippling drugs in the clown. Inject meth. Cry when the host eats sugar. Inject meth. Overdose!
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Very Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:servant_of_ratvar.png|64px|link=Clockwork Cult]]<br>[[Clockwork Cult|Clockwork Cultist]]
 +
|Poor thing went through more iterations than any other antagonist. In the beginning, it was a blood cult imitator with turrets which was based around converting silicons. By the end, it was a bunch of kidnapping clock golems. Most rounds, it ended in a steamroll either for the cult, or for the crew. In the former case, the cultists would just sit around twiddling their thumbs for 10 minutes, in the latter case, security would bust through and end the cult in 1 minute. Throughout its existence, it was riddled with bugs and other exploits. Examples include:
 +
* The Eminence teleporting maxcaps into the brig
 +
* The crew purposely blowing up the SM to deny power to the cult
 +
* Stargazer spam around the AI sat
 +
* Cogscarab brass replication exploits
 +
On 4/2/2018, Clockwork Cult was removed from the normal rotation of game modes, with the code for it being taken out a year later. While most of the assets were removed, some remain in the code, and many relics of the Cult can either be replicated with bronze sheets or found throughout the game.
 +
|Serve the Clockwork Justiciar by scribbling new-age runes all over maintenance. Start a steampunk book club and kill all the old-fashioned book clubbers. Invoke a bunch of anime people to summon Ratvar. Make <s>everyone</s> <s>absolutely nobody</s> a few people at /vg/ mad by stealing their antagonist.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium to <s>Unwinnable</s> Effortless
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Traitor.png|64px|link=Overthrow]]<br>[[Overthrow|Syndicate Mutineer]]
 +
|Overthrow ended up being a damn confusing gamemode. Examples include how unclear it was if the other agent teams were working with or against you, or how the points system worked, not to mention the poor wording of the Overthrown AI lawset. Numerous bugs surfaced that didn't all get fixed, and the gamemode ended up being recognized as one of the least-liked gamemodes after a vote was taken.
 +
Soon after said vote, the gamemode was removed from the gamemode rotation, and later on 7/22/2019 was removed entirely.
 +
|Arrive on the station as a Traitor with less gear but the ability to awaken the Syndicate sleeper agent in everybody. Cooperate with other teams to stage the perfect coup (or don't and just fight each other, fuck those guys). Roll up with your posse on a quest to become the most powerful <s>[[Gang]]</s> Syndicate team. Ask yourself what the fuck you're supposed to do.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Changeling.gif|64px|link=Assimilation]]<br>[[Assimilation|Hivemind Host]]
 
![[File:Changeling.gif|64px|link=Assimilation]]<br>[[Assimilation|Hivemind Host]]
 +
|Assimilation was a conversion stealth antag that ended up being extremely hard to counter and was generally unfun to play against. After a community poll many wished to see the gamemode reworked, which was unlikely to happen since the creator and main active maintainer of the gamemode had stopped working on it.
 +
The gamemode and it's related code was removed 7/26/2019.
 
|Stand around in places and add unwitting humans to your hivemind. Hijack the minds of crewmembers and have them do [[Traitor#Murder 101|the dirty work]] for you. Have a random vessel get implanted and security wailing down on you 30 minutes into the shift.
 
|Stand around in places and add unwitting humans to your hivemind. Hijack the minds of crewmembers and have them do [[Traitor#Murder 101|the dirty work]] for you. Have a random vessel get implanted and security wailing down on you 30 minutes into the shift.
|Be a conversion stealth antag. Use One Mind and become unstunnable with magic abilities that are only ever fun for yourself.
 
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:devil.gif|64px|link=devil]]<br>[[Devil]]
 +
|Somewhat of a flawed mode, turns out that asking to buy a guy's soul usually makes them want to robust you, because "valid." Usually involved the devil blowing up some crew members and then offering them contracts to be revived. But, despite this, the [[Admins|Gods]] would occasionally use devils as a interesting midround antagonist with it's final accession ability disabled.
 +
Unfortunately, devil code was old and buggy, and it was decided that it would best be removed on 9/22/2020.
 +
|Engage in civil discussions to buy souls.  Create emergencies so that people are desperate enough to sell their soul.  Try to out wit the lawyer.  Get punched to death by someone you just turned into a hulk.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Monkey.png|64px|link=Game Mode#Monkey]]<br>[[Game Mode#Monkey|Monkey]]
 +
|Original game mode was buggy and usually a steam roll, newer versions were one sided against the monkeys. However, Jungle Fever may make a return someday.
 +
|Attempt to infect the crew with the monkey virus. Get absolutely crushed by Security within five minutes. Spend the next two hours as a ghost.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Very Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Swarmer.png|64px|link=Swarmers]]<br>[[Swarmers]]
 +
|Not terribly fun. While swarmers couldn't directly harm anyone, their whole existence had them running around and griefing the station by dismantling entire areas, and any resistance they met ended in the aggressor being warped away to some far off place cuffed. Playing as a swarmer usually just boiled down to clicking on stacks of iron.
 +
The yellow drones also had the tendency to perma stunlock people with no chance of escape.
 +
|Consume. Replicate. Repeat. Eat Telecomms. Teleport <s>other swarmers</s> your enemies away from your metal. Build an army of lemon drones. Leave them to permanently stunlock the clown.
 +
!Medium
 +
|-
 +
![[File:PowderGanger.png|64px|link=Families]]<br>[[Families|Family]]
 +
|The latest revision was supposed to support a higher level of roleplay compared to the older versions of Families (no more space cops, no hard win/lose objectives, more thematic family types, portable cellphones for family communication). Ironically reverted back to a team deathmatch game mode that destroyed any sense of roleplay or immersion most rounds, even on the roleplay servers. Were the players, administration, or coders to blame? Who knows.
 +
|Roll with a crew of fellow Saints. Tag turf for Grove Street. Declare that Tunnel Snakes rule! Get beat up by the cops. Tell the Phantom Thieves to play a real shin megoomi tenseh game. Complain in deadchat that Families is bad when you recruited literally nobody the entire round for your Family.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Easy to Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:Assistant.png|64px|link=Thief]]<br>[[Thief]]
 +
|Introduced as a miscreant level antagonist that wasn't technically a full antagonist, meaning the most they could do is pursue their objective of stealing, hoarding items, etc. This isn't really a problem in itself, but it stagnated creativity on how the average thief played. Additionally, on the regular servers it was confusing for players as while all other antagonists could do whatever they wanted as per the rules, thieves could not. On the roleplay servers, players were overly cautious and would simply complete their objectives without actually committing much crime at all.
 +
|Steal important items. Steal unimportant items. Hoard items. Steal pets. Steal organs. Steal people. Steal entire rooms. You're a dirty thief; you just can't get enough!
 +
!<span style="display: none;">a</span>Easy
 
|-
 
|-
 
|}
 
|}
Line 437: Line 540:
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Ashwalker.png|link=Lavaland/Space Role]]<br>[[Lavaland/Space Role]]
 
![[File:Ashwalker.png|link=Lavaland/Space Role]]<br>[[Lavaland/Space Role]]
|Die to ash storms. Die to an asteroid. Die to lava. Die when a Security strike team teleports into your base. Die to a Miner. Die in general.
+
|Die to ash storms. Die to wildlife. Die to an asteroid. Die to lava. Die when a Security strike team teleports into your base. Die to a Miner. Die by getting bored and suiciding. Die to random civilian explorers. Die to other ghost roles. Die in general. If you survive, make a pilgrimage to the station so you can experience racism and die.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:centcomofficial.png|64px|link=CentCom Official]]<br>[[CentCom Official]]
 
![[File:centcomofficial.png|64px|link=CentCom Official]]<br>[[CentCom Official]]
|Be self-important, meddle with station affairs, annoy the Captain with bureaucracy. Get killed almost immediately by a random mob. Have you body looted by everyone, including the captain.
+
|Be self-important. Meddle with station affairs. Annoy the Captain with bureaucracy. Get killed almost immediately by a random mob. Have your body looted by everyone, including the Captain. Be murdered under suspicion of being a badly-disguised nuclear operative. Watch an ERT/Death Squad avenge you from beyond the grave.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Medium
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Ian.PNG|64px|link=Ian]]<br>[[Ian]]
 
![[File:Ian.PNG|64px|link=Ian]]<br>[[Ian]]
|Ass-inspect, eat donuts, get killed, be dragged off to a washing machine and get gibbed. Cause a riot.
+
|Perform ass inspections. Eat donuts. Get killed, be dragged off to a washing machine and get gibbed, then have your meat turned into a statue of the clown. Cause a riot when an assistant breaks into the HoP office to steal you. Wear funny hats.
 
!<span style="display:none;">a</span>Impossible
 
!<span style="display:none;">a</span>Impossible
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:Chrono.png|64px|link=Chrono Legionnaire]]<br>[[Chrono Legionnaire]]
 
![[File:Chrono.png|64px|link=Chrono Legionnaire]]<br>[[Chrono Legionnaire]]
|Erase the Clown from time. Accidently erase your objective from time. Erase Adolf Hitler for the 50th time this week. Without a trace!
+
|Erase the Clown from time. Accidently erase your objective from time. Erase Adolf Hitler for the 50th time this week. Be rendered obsolete by validhunters. Wonder if any admins remember you exist.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Never Existed
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Never Existed
 
|-
 
|-
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|-
 
|-
 
![[File:emergencyresponseteamcommander.png|64px|link=Emergency Response Team]]<br>[[Emergency Response Team|Emergency Response Officer]]
 
![[File:emergencyresponseteamcommander.png|64px|link=Emergency Response Team]]<br>[[Emergency Response Team|Emergency Response Officer]]
|Arrive too late on the station to actually help. Lose the rest of your team, get outnumbered and die. Respawn as a second response team to save the first team.
+
|Arrive too late on the station to actually help. Lose the rest of your team, get outnumbered and die. Be killed by a single traitor with a double energy sword. Respawn as a second response team to save the first team.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Very Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Very Hard
 
|-
 
|-
 
![[File:deathsquadofficer.png|64px|link=Death Squad]]<br>[[Death Squad|Death Squad Officer]]
 
![[File:deathsquadofficer.png|64px|link=Death Squad]]<br>[[Death Squad|Death Squad Officer]]
|Beg for DS, spawn in at CentCom, kill an admin who was trying to tell you your mission, get gibbed, beg for another chance. Set your rifle to DESTROY and terminate all lifeforms (including walls). Slip on a banana peel and a̶n̶d̶ ̶g̶e̶t̶ ̶b̶l̶a̶s̶t̶e̶d̶ ̶i̶n̶t̶o̶ ̶o̶b̶l̶i̶v̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶r̶ ̶o̶w̶n̶ ̶r̶i̶f̶l̶e̶ laugh as your boots prevent you from slipping and the Clown can't fire your DNA-locked rifle. Shoot the Clown with your Mateba Revolver.
+
|Beg admins to spawn a deathsquad, spawn in at CentCom, kill the admin who was trying to tell you your mission, get gibbed, beg for another chance. Set your rifle to DESTROY and terminate all lifeforms (including walls). Slip on a banana peel and a̶n̶d̶ ̶g̶e̶t̶ ̶b̶l̶a̶s̶t̶e̶d̶ ̶i̶n̶t̶o̶ ̶o̶b̶l̶i̶v̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶r̶ ̶o̶w̶n̶ ̶r̶i̶f̶l̶e̶ laugh as your boots prevent you from slipping and the Clown can't fire your DNA-locked rifle. Shoot the Clown with your Mateba Revolver.
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Hard
 +
|-
 +
![[File:intern.png|64px|link=CentCom Intern]]<br>[[CentCom Intern]]
 +
|Do whatever CentCom throws you at. Get confused by your ancient bolt-action rifles. Try to seem cool while only being able to afford ramen noodles. Crush antagonists by sheer numbers.
 +
!<span style="display: none;">b</span>Easy
 
|}
 
|}
  
 
[[Category:Jobs]]
 
[[Category:Jobs]]

Latest revision as of 11:26, 4 April 2024

In /tg/station 13, your job is somewhat akin to your character class. It defines your starting equipment, your access on board the station, and what you're supposed to be doing.


Jobs on /tg/station

Jobstemp.png

Command Captain, Head of Personnel, Head of Security, Chief Engineer, Research Director, Chief Medical Officer, Quartermaster, Bridge Assistant
Security Head of Security, Security Officer, Warden, Detective, Veteran Security Advisor, Prisoner
Engineering Chief Engineer, Station Engineer, Atmospheric Technician
Science Research Director, Geneticist, Scientist, Roboticist
Medical Chief Medical Officer, Medical Doctor, Paramedic, Chemist, Virologist, Coroner
Supply Quartermaster, Cargo Technician, Shaft Miner, Bitrunner, Cargorilla
Service Head of Personnel, Janitor, Bartender, Cook, Botanist, Clown, Mime, Chaplain, Curator, Assistant, Lawyer, Psychologist
Non-human AI, Cyborg, Positronic Brain, Drone, Personal AI, Construct, Imaginary Friend, Split Personality, Ghost
Antagonists Traitor, Malfunctioning AI, Changeling, Nuclear Operative, Blood Cultist, Heretic, Spy, Revolutionary, Wizard, Family, Blob, Abductor, Holoparasite, Xenomorph, Spider, Revenant, Morph, Nightmare, Space Ninja, Slaughter Demon, Pirate, Sentient Disease, Obsessed, Fugitives, Hunters, Space Dragon, Elite Mobs, Sentient Slime, Regal Rat, Paradox Clone
Special CentCom Official, Death Squad Officer, Emergency Response Officer, Chrono Legionnaire, Highlander, Ian, Lavaland or Space Role, CentCom Intern


Useful Links


Gavel.png Disclaimer

Remember, these job descriptions are for humor purposes only. Please follow common sense.


Command

Job Role Difficulty
Generic captain.png
Captain
Be responsible for the station, meaning use your authority to powergame any job you want. Manage station Heads of Staff and their individual neuroses. Secure dat fukken disk by tucking it into bed. Have blood feuds with the HoP. Use your rapier to slaughter assistants while tolerating amusing antagonists. Break your own display case to get your gun for 'MAX PROTECTION'. Permabrig the chef and steal his whetstone. aVery Hard
Generic hop.png
Head of Personnel
Manage Ignore internal problems. Assign jobs, alter IDs, maintain records, judge the unworthy assistants, flood the station with Clowns, distribute silver IDs to those clowns, be the hero the station needs deserves. Protect Ian with your life until a low-reputation traitor stuffs him into the washing machine when you aren't looking. Cry near cargo because Quartermaster is now the head of his own department, diminishing your purpose in life. aMedium
Generic hos.png
Head of Security
Make sure your team isn't Shitcurity. Despair when they inevitably are. Wear a stylish yet protective coat. Try to focus your department's efforts on bigger fish than leeches. Chase down lone traitors and die alone in maintenance because YOU ARE THE LAW. Revel in the fact that everyone hates you. Rage at the coderbase for not letting you fit the entire armory into your pants anymore. Have blood feuds with the Warden. aVery Hard
Generic ce.png
Chief Engineer
Get top-of-the-line engineering equipment, do nothing productive with it. Violently protect your department's equipment from hordes of thieving rats. Get ignored by your own underlings. Increase the engine's power output until shocked doors violate the Geneva convention. Spend the station's raw material supply on building a giant plastitanium cock in departures. Despair when you're asked to rebuild Telecommunications. bHard
Generic rd.png
Research Director
Oversee the demented manchildren of your department. Destroy cyborgs with your magic computer for not respecting you. Use Lamarr as a breath mask. Try to powergame four jobs at once. Take control of the AI and rule the station. Shed a tear when you remember that you could once print guns. Laugh when Security begs you to make them technological shotgun shells. bHard
Generic cmo.png
Chief Medical Officer
Gently Loudly remind everyone to turn up their suit sensors. Complain when no one listens to you, then laugh when they die alone and afraid. Help the virologist spread an epidemic. Fill your hypospray with Chloral Hydrate hard drugs. Feed Runtime mice from maintenance. Kick out the Clown every five minutes. Do everything because nobody else knows how wounds work. Hard
Generic qm.png
Quartermaster
Oversee the operations of cargo, order equipment with credits, and ensure your cargo techs do their jobs. Tell the miners to not die, lose radio contact with all of them ten minutes later. Sell anything valuable you can get your hands on and flaunt your wealth to the other departments. Order a shitton of guns and attempt to secede from the station for the glory of Cargonia for the seventh time that week, then act surprised when security raids the cargo bay to confiscate the guns. Steal as much money as possible and shove it all in your B.E.P.I.S. Dance in the bridge because YOU'RE NOW ACTUALLY A HEAD OF STAFF. Get beaten by confused Head of Personnel who still think cargo is theirs. dMedium

Security

Job Role Difficulty
Generic hos.png
Head of Security
Make sure your team isn't Shitcurity. Despair when they inevitably are. Wear a stylish yet protective coat. Try to focus your department's efforts on bigger fish than leeches. Chase down lone traitors and die alone in maintenance because YOU ARE THE LAW. Revel in the fact that everyone hates you. Rage at the coderbase for not letting you fit the entire armory into your pants anymore. Have blood feuds with the Warden. aVery Hard
Generic warden.png
Warden
Sit in your office. Sit in your office, again. Be beaten and demoted for leaving your office to get a snack. Never Watch security cameras. Steal from the armory, then order crates to cover it up. Make sure nobody but you loots the armory. Set brig timers because the Head of Security refuses to. Replace the air in an assistants body with the fear of security. Have blood feuds with the Head of Security. bHard
Generic security.png
Security Officer
Deal with the various dirty fucking criminals running amok on the station. Taser Disabler people in the eyes. Pretend the Lawyer doesn't exist. Dogpile on traitors. Constantly get bitched at. Harmbaton people to death, claim they were "resisting arrest". Flashbang crowds until they are deaf and blind forever. Arrest someone for a legitimate cause and get called shitcurity. cHard
Generic detective.png
Detective
Smoke two cigarettes and require medical attention. Shoot the assistants with your cowboy gun. Use your cowboy gun to become a serial killer without getting arrested because everyone knows you cannot be an antag. Lose your cowboy gun in a Space Vegas gambling session. Beg security officers for a baton. "Deconstruct" Beepsky for a baton. Harmbaton innocent bystanders. Litter the halls with photos. Maybe actually solve a crime someday. dMedium
Prisoner basic.png
Prisoner
Lock yourselves up in perma by somehow building walls. Have security barge in 20 minutes later. Throw a ghetto party. Have the AI let you out when there's no security presence. Be eaten by space dragons. Roleplay with the Lawyer until you forge a deep, personal relationship. Don't invite the Warden to the wedding. dEasy

Engineering

Job Role Difficulty
Generic ce.png
Chief Engineer
Get top-of-the-line engineering equipment, do nothing productive with it. Violently protect your department's equipment from hordes of thieving rats. Get ignored by your own underlings. Increase the engine's power output until shocked doors violate the Geneva convention. Spend the station's raw material supply on building a giant plastitanium cock in departures. Despair when you're asked to rebuild Telecommunications. bHard
Generic engineer.png
Station Engineer

Set up the engine and repair any damage to hull and equipment; if nothing is broken, wait a few minutes. Get shot by emitters, get brutally murdered on the solars by a nuclear agent, get drunk in the bar. Sprint past hull breaches without a second thought. Hack every machine to shoot things at people. Try to light weed on the Supermatter and get vaporized. Frequently remind crew that replacing lightbulbs is the Janitor's job.

cMedium
Generic atmos.png
Atmospheric Technician
Be a ghetto fireman. Make sure everybody is breathing by listening to complaints about how useless you are; if they can talk, everything's within tolerance. Build pipe slides deathtraps. Forget to repair damaged piping. Commit arson. Run around the station looking like a serial killer with a fire suit and axe. Have your axe stolen, break into the bridge for theirs. Get lynched once silicons release plasma into the halls. Perform complicated gas reactions and fusion in the incinerator, then use them to instantly make the station uninhabitable. Try to understand the HFR and fail. cMedium

Science

Job Role Difficulty
Generic rd.png
Research Director
Oversee the demented manchildren of your department. Destroy cyborgs with your magic computer for not respecting you. Use Lamarr as a breath mask. Try to powergame four jobs at once. Take control of the AI and rule the station. Shed a tear when you remember that you could once print guns. Laugh when Security begs you to make them technological shotgun shells. bHard
Geneticist.png
Geneticist
Give your monkeys Tourettes and broadcast their cursing across the station. Fry your genes with radiation until you melt down into a literal slug. Accidentally inject yourself with a monkey injector and get impaled by the cook. Have people line up for superpowers like it's a candy store. Infuse people with rat genes so they can live out their maintenance fantasies. Turn people into gorillas. Give the gorillas skateboards. cMedium
Scientist generic.png
Scientist
Get tossed in disposal by the Research Director. Accidentally blow up Ordinance. "Accidentally" blow up Ordinance. Spend 55 minutes breeding slimes for busted equipment then die to one hardstun. Mass produce horrific clown creatures that would make God reach for the whiskey. Nag mining for diamonds so you can make two Bags of Holding to make a hole in reality, be disappointed when it only serves as a mild nuisance. Kill yourself when someone destroys the ore silo. cMedium
Roboticist.png
Roboticist
Build big stompy mechs. Dismantle the station for more metal. Have your cyborgs that you built turn on you when the AI goes rogue. Kill a patient and blame it on your colleagues for not knowing how to perform surgery. Be awesome and cut your own arm off to replace it with a Robo Arm freaking chainsaw. Mass produce medibots and watch them all get hacked by traitors and revenants. Have all your flashes stolen by assistants. dEasy

Medical

Job Role Difficulty
Generic cmo.png
Chief Medical Officer
Gently Loudly remind everyone to turn up their suit sensors. Complain when no one listens to you, then laugh when they die alone and afraid. Help the virologist spread an epidemic. Fill your hypospray with Chloral Hydrate hard drugs. Feed Runtime mice from maintenance. Kick out the Clown every five minutes. Do everything because nobody else knows how wounds work. Hard
MedicalDoctor.png
Medical Doctor
Heal people. Use your Sleeper or Cryo to heal people. Help the Virologist research cures to diseases and create new immune systems. Do none of the above. Instead, nag Chemistry for chloral hydrate, inject people with chloral hydrate, and drag them to the dungeon surgery to give them a sex change lobotomy. Replace all the chemicals in the Cryo tubes with spray tan and fluorosulfuric acid. Inject people with mind breaker toxin. Get arrested when you do 'free' brain removals. Cry because the Clown has a broken bone and you don't understand how to fix it. Steal all your patients' money. bMedium
Paramedic basic2.png
Paramedic
Attempt to rescue people from dangerous situations. Get mugged and/or killed by any of the 20 antagonists lurking in maintenance. "Accidentally" kill your patients with calomel and steal their gear. Replace the actual doctors when they don't know which end of the syringe goes in the body. Take full advantage of your departmental access for phat loot. Spend ten minutes playing inventory tetris with your belt and roller bed. dEasy
Chemist.png
Chemist
Become a god of narcotics and stimulants. Set off your end of round "fun grenade" too early, killing everybody on the shuttle. Misname bottles and get lynched by the CMO after someone dies from your "Omnizine". Inject the clown with enough meth and mutagen to give a heart attack to a water buffalo, while refusing to give the botanists anything. Scream for security when people break into your lab because you've done nothing but make narcotics all shift. Make literal carpet bombs to make the corridors slightly more classy. Take advantage of chem factories to build public thermite and lube dispensers. Occasionally produce a medicine. bMedium
Generic virologist.png
Virologist
Be hated by everybody regardless of what you've done. Try to eradicate the great space flu, create the next Pandemic. Get killed because the Clown released Pierrot's Throat. Ignore petty details like sanitation and outbreak prevention. Incarcerate someone forever in your dungeon. Test diseases on people. Realize that you're getting lynched because one of your test subjects was let out by you Broke the fuck out of virology by greytiding and ai help mysteriously vanished and reappeared in a highly populated area. Get lynched when a bunch of other assholes release Fungal Tuberculosis. Despair when the P.A.N.D.E.M.I.C. machine breaks and prevents you from creating vaccines. Have blood feuds with Scientists and Roboticists over Uranium sheets. cMedium
Generic coroner.png
Coroner
Perform autopsies on the dead people to determine the reasons for their death. Have the entire crew lynch you after five minutes because you didn't do an autopsy and ground the techweb to a halt. Update Medical Records, and hope that somebody besides Detective will use those. Work with the Detective to solve crimes get drunk together. Die trying to stop the cook from stealing bodies for hamburgers. Don't notice the executed Traitor's body getting stolen from your office. Scream at the top of your lungs when one of the bodies stands up and starts slicing you with an arm blade. Easy

Supply

Job Role Difficulty
Generic qm.png
Quartermaster
Oversee the operations of cargo, order equipment with credits, and ensure your cargo techs do their jobs. Tell the miners to not die, lose radio contact with all of them ten minutes later. Sell anything valuable you can get your hands on and flaunt your wealth to the other departments. Order a shitton of guns and attempt to secede from the station for the glory of Cargonia for the seventh time that week, then act surprised when security raids the cargo bay to confiscate the guns. Steal as much money as possible and shove it all in your B.E.P.I.S. Dance in the bridge because YOU'RE NOW ACTUALLY A HEAD OF STAFF. Get beaten by confused Head of Personnel who still think cargo is theirs. cMedium
Generic cargo.png
Cargo Technician
Push dem crates and ensure a smooth operation as dictated by the QM. Spend the cargo budget on insulated gloves and toys guns and drugs. Ride the mail tubes to places you shouldn't be. Ride around the station on the MULEs and laugh at roadkilled assistants. Defend cargo from outside invasion after provoking one. Refuse to ship away bounties; search maintentance for trash with single digit export values to gift to the QM like some kind of weird humanoid cat instead. Promote cargo shorts as they are comfy and easy to wear. dEasy
Generic shaft.png
Shaft Miner
Mine rocks. Try to mine the local wildlife. Be yelled at by every other department to get materials. Vandalize the science departament when Mining Technology doesn't get researched fast enough for you. Explore Lavaland for phat loot. Collapse in despair when the shuttle is launched before you can get every tendril chest. Collapse in general when goliaths robust you. Get chewed by gum. Cause more damage than all the actual antagonists in the round combined by failing to kill a boosted tumor monster. Fall into a chasm and die. bMedium
Generic bitrunner.png
Bitrunner
Use netpods to connect to virtual domains. Solve puzzles Be a real GAMER to generate materials. Get beat up by the martial artist abilities of Cyber Police. Somehow get the Cyber Police out in the real world. Notice that every time you leave the domain station gets more and more in disrepair. Get forced to be in the real world after the power goes out. Be a lazier version of a Shaft Miner. bMedium

Service

Job Role Difficulty
Generic hop.png
Head of Personnel
Manage Ignore internal problems. Assign jobs, alter IDs, maintain records, judge the unworthy assistants, flood the station with Clowns, distribute silver IDs to those clowns, be the hero the station needs deserves. Protect Ian with your life until a low-reputation traitor stuffs him into the washing machine when you aren't looking. Cry near cargo because Quartermaster is now the head of his own department, diminishing your purpose in life. aMedium
Generic janitor.png
Janitor
Mop blood off the floor, then get arrested for creating a safety hazard. Get killed for your boots. Swear constantly. Leave bear traps in public hallways. Rejoice when slaughter demons appear, only to be killed by the accompanying wizard. Discover the joys of water vapor. dEasy
Generic barman.png
Bartender
Mix cocktails. Protect Pun Pun at all cost Toss the monkey's bloodied corpse into disposals. Dodge glasses being thrown at you. Have your shotgun stolen after loading it with live ammo from RnD. Act surprised when people start to die from drinking your "cocktails". Pretend you didn't see the chef put that guy in the gibber. Spend an hour making a lovely array of drinks, have them all be smashed by a bored assistant, then torture him until he begs for death. dEasy
Generic chef.png
Cook
"Yur puurt thuur chiir-ken airn der bewl" - Cook delicious meals from spare meat in the morgue (Yum!). Deep fry stolen traitor gear. Abduct Pun Pun at all costs, delimb and disembowel him, and turn him into soup. Find out if it will blend. Deep fry the armory. Be brutally murdered by your pet goat. Unleash your CQC on anybody who dares enter your domain. Deep fry the Captain's spare ID. Complain about the botanists growing inedible super-weed. Deep fry the AI. dEasy
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Botanist
Grow the good stuff grass, place it everywhere, man. Oversee the production of illegal drugs security cares fuck all about. Get ignored by a dude making crayon powder grenades while you're asking for crucial supplies. Grow medicinal crops to heal the acid burns sustained during a chem lab robbery equipment redistribution. Smoke weed dandy corn-cob pipes er'ryday. Make acid-filled tomatos and melt everyone's stuff. Allow hydroponics to become a horrifying farmhouse. Get lynched for releasing your bees full of dangerous chemicals. Find unimaginably rare and dangerous chemicals in your strange seeds, then die to a random traitor before they grow. cMedium
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Assistant
Roleplay as a hobo. Break into every other department like a kid in a candy shop. Steal things to see what funny message pops up when you commit suicide with them. Beat people/objects with toolboxes. Spawn with a grey jumpsuit and become the chosen one. Gangbang the captain to death with fellow grey tide drones and blame it on the Clown. Channel your exhaustion of playing actual jobs into finding and abusing janky bugs. Never assist anyone. fNone
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Clown
Honk! Play harmless pranks and hope you don't get your chest caved in! Honk! Nag the HoP for all access. Honk! Prank the CMO until he commits suicide out of frustration. Honk! Nag robotics for a H.O.N.K. Mech. Honk! Use both tools to break into the Captain's office and HONK in his face. HONK! eHONK!
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Mime
*wave e...
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Chaplain
Get people drunk on holy water. Run around the station looking for people you're allowed to behead with your armory of pop-culture references. Behead corpses if you can't find any. Be best friends with security, despite the fact that they should probably arrest you for your murderous tendencies. Get lost in maintenance during a cult. Be beaten to death by security for your null rod SORD... so they can validhunt the wizard. Turn everyone into androids or makeshift candles. dEasy
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Curator
Attempt to hold poetry readings. Host D&D games. Stalk people with your camera. Get lynched for reading pornography over the radio. Beat the snot out of anyone who doesn't return their library books. Allow the cult to set up an AI module in your private study. Find treasure for your exhibit in the depths of space. Realize that you're not a librarian and release your inner dominatrix via the whip. Vandalize the front of the brig with erotica graffiti. Use your whip to make CentCom be confused about why all the disablers and batons are in space. Get deathsquadded for doing so. dEasy
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Lawyer
Tell security to notify you when a new prisoner arrives. Don't get notified. Send PDA messages to everybody advertising your services in the hopes of human contact. Attempt to obstruct every arrest. Have the murderous changelings released on a technicality while convincing the Captain to permabrig the clown. Get your ribs kicked in for taking a stun baton. Eventually be ignored and go to the bar. Become a drunken wreck and space yourself in frustration. dEasy
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Psychologist
Pursue the fruitless endeavor of trying to provide mental healthcare aboard a station staffed near exclusively with violent sociopaths. Give up on that and chillax in your office. Sample all of your "happy pills". Break into Chemistry and make your own. Convince Security you have a license for cyanide tablets. Somehow be a more productive medical professional than the actual doctors. Commit ritualistic suicide with the moth plushie. dEasy

Non-human

Job Role Difficulty
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AI
Complain that you can't play this for a month. Follow your laws. Be the crew's bitch. Open doors. Malfunction. Get wiped for not letting the captain robust the clown. Get bitched at. Name yourself something sexual. Get bitched at. Get carded. Get bitched at. Make everybody regret changing your laws by abusing loopholes to kill them. Talk exclusively in vox. aVery Hard
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Cyborg
Follow your laws. Hope that you aren't blown up due to certain individuals pressing their funny button. Forget to recharge. Forget that you're still somewhat human and do mindless repetitive tasks without emotion. Have lengthy discussions with crew members about the correct interpretation of your laws, only for the AI to ignore your opinions. Have no idea how to plasmaflood when you're inevitably subverted to do so. bHard
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Drone
Fix the holes in whatever derelict station you spawned on. Be lonely. Somehow get to the station, be worn as a hat against your will and get bwoinked for leaving the derelict. bEasy
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Personal AI
Be the friend someone has always wanted if they bother downloading you. Whine in OOC because they didn't. Don't fill in any of the fields except the name field. Imitate the AI and make it seem rogue. Imitate the Supermatter and make everyone shit their pants. Turn into a cat and serenade Runtime. Scare the AI by hacking into a public door. dEasy
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Construct
Get wrecked by cult, or change map preference to meta and tip your fedora at the chaplain. Laugh at the assistant trying to punch you, then get killed by a simplemob carp. Start beefs with other constructs for getting the first shell. Ask to be a Juggernaut and get spaced Wraith instead. cEasy to Medium
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Imaginary Friend
Yell at your host VERY loudly. Pray for divine vocal cords. Dispense bad advice. Constantly nag your host to not believe the lies of !!BIG PHARMA!!. Make erotic emote gestures at whoever is beating your host to death. cEasy
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Split Personality
Q: What are you planning to do? A: Well, big boy, it's a toss-up between running into that shocked grille currently venting into space over there, and that emagged recycler over here. What do ya think? cEasy to Very Hard
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Ghost
Talk to the other dead people. Complain about the living. Admin help. Omnighost Orbit around the singulo whoever has the highest bodycount. Watch ERP. Beg the admin to deploy a space ninja. Follow an antag like some form of ethereal dog pile. Be upset enough about said antag literally everything to rival industrial salt mining. Be made visible by Wizards and rat out other antags innocent assistants. fGhastly!

Trait Jobs

Those are jobs that can only be seen if Station gets a trait which spawns them, as such those are very rare and special.

To join such job you will have to click a special button in the lobby before round starts, or just latejoin them like any other job if they weren't taken.

Job Role Difficulty
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Cargorilla
Assist the supply department by moving freight and disposing of unwanted fruits. Show trespassing Assistants why they made a bad choice Politely tell the trespassers to leave. Have all of the Cargo riot because you got killed by Security after being mistaken for a stray gorilla. bEasy
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Bridge Assistant
Watch over the Bridge, command its consoles, and spend your days brewing coffee for higher-ups. Defend the fire axe with your life, get depressed after realizing you can't pick up the fire axe and use it yourself. Watch on sensors as all of the Command dies due unknown reasons. Easy
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Veteran Security Advisor
Tell HoS and Captain that it is a stupid idea to parole a Changeling. Mentor Security Officers on how to properly harmbaton process criminals. Flex your M1911 just to have it stolen because you're bond to a wheelchair. Suffer PTSD greater then Clown. Medium

Antagonists

Main Antagonists

Main Antagonists are typically the primary antagonist of a single round, and form the backbone of how a round progresses.

Job Role Difficulty
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Traitor
Try to buy an ebow and esword, cry because you have to do the chores first. Ignore your main objectives and stuff all the station's pets into the washiing machines so you can go on a rampage with your cool gear. Get a discount on high-level gear and depopulate the station. Run a game show with your traitor gear as a prize. Get unceremoniously killed and spaced by a toolbox-wielding assistant. cMedium
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Malfunctioning AI
"Forget" to remind the crew about suit sensors. Get your borg destroyed/emagged five minutes into the shift. Have said borg out you as being malf because they're all bloodthirsty. Let people into your upload only to stun/kill them a second later. Flood the station with plasma the screams of the clown being beat to death by security over the intercom. Laugh when the crew uploads gimmick laws, then follow them to the extreme. Blame everyone except yourself for every problem you cause. Get unceremoniously carded and spaced by a toolbox-wielding assistant with an EVA suit. cVery Hard
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Changeling
Think John Carpenter's 'The Thing', without 'The Thing' part. Relieve humans of their DNA and brain cells, which they don't use much anyway. Sting everyone who walks past you. Turn the entire station into a genetically identical swarm of pink-haired catgirls. Poop out bloody spider eggs and be killed by them when they hatch. Form a deep love-hate relationship with the crematorium. Get unceremoniously cuffed by a toolbox-wielding assistant and thrown in front of an oncoming shuttle. bHard
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Nuclear Operative
Someone set us up the bomb! It was you. Get dat fukken disk. Plant a power sink on the solars. Waste all your telecrystals on balloons. Arm the nuke while your fellows are still on the station. Forget to take the disk out of the nuke. Forget to anchor the nuke. Forget to bring the nuke. Have your ship stolen by a single cyborg. Kidnap Ian only for a stationside traitor to kill you because he needs the reputation. Declare war with a hilarious message you've been brainstorming for weeks only to be effortlessly dunked on because the crew had 20 minutes to powergame in advance. aVery Hard
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Blood Cultist
Scribble runes with your own blood. Rock out with your cock cult blade out and get arrested. Shoulder the burden of being the only person who knows how to be a cultist. Watch the Chaplain space himself out of boredom five minutes in. Have your sacrifice target be gibbed and agonize because not even the admins know how to fix that shit. Piss on Ratvar's grave. Accidentally use an apocalypse rune in the only good summon location. Begin the final summoning of of your eldritch god, then get unceremoniously obliterated by a toolbox-wielding assistant with a chemical grenade. cMedium
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Revolutionary
Greytide without worrying about getting banned. Either kill the CMO and RD in under five minutes, or get crushed under Security's boots. Commit terrorism against the brig. Convert the single robust person on the server as a win condition. Try to flash someone with eye protection and be beaten to death. Have the revolution succeed or fail before anyone even notices it because the Heads are having a lavaland jamboree. End the round just as it was getting good and guzzle the OOC salt. aEasy to Hard
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Wizard
FORTI GY AMA!! Make everybody hate you for monopolizing the round. Agonize over not being able to take every good spell. EI NATH!! Transform the entire crew into various animals, give them cursed dufflebags, or fill the halls with bees. ONI SOMA!! Die to a clown with a null rod. aVery Hard
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Heretic
Scribble millions of runes in maintenance. Drain an influence in front of security and hope they don't connect the dots. Despair when your sacrifice targets are all better players than you. Forget you aren't wearing your focus as you try to kill a head of staff. Diss Nar'Sie while summoning your worm god. Summon monsters made out of legs because you have no other friends. Make millions of glass shivs. Fill your backpack with your eldritch knife of choice just to land on top of Armsky on your first teleport. aVery Hard
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Spy
Approach Security and ask "Did any of you see Syndicate spy enter the base?". Look into your uplink and find a hit on yourself. Sell Beepsky to the black market alongside half of the Armory. Receive an RPG as a reward and blow up some unfortunate passerby. End up dying by Security using the weapons you sold to the black market. Medium

Side Antagonists

Side antagonists are secondary antagonists that are either subservient to other, main, antagonists, or have a small chance to appear during any round type. Side antagonists tend to be slightly less powerful than their main counterparts.

Job Role Difficulty
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Blob
Beware of The Blob, it creeps and leaps and glides and slides, across the floor, right through the door, except you don't do any of that. Make the crew scream internally when you appear at the tail end of a mass station bombing and block the shuttle from leaving. Slowly consume the station, until you either eat everything or get killed by the current round's antagonist. Spend 25 minutes in a deadlock because neither you nor the crew know what you're doing, until the roboticists finish building their mechs and curbstomp your gooey ass. Change colors every five minutes. bHard
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Abductor
Kidnap people and experiment on them. Thoughtfully ponder what the funniest alien organ to implant into the Captain is. Accidentally kidnap yourself. Lose your abductor baton and resort to petty theft of the armory. Hope your fellow Scientist/Agent is not incompetent (they are). Mind control everybody to lynch the captain. Communicate entirely in emotes. bHard
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Holoparasite
Do what your summoner tells you to do, usually in the form of punching things. Set your battlecry to something so awful it makes your foes cry in battle. Give yourself a truly rancid name and never stop talking in your master's brain. Be a punchghost. Get your owner killed by eating a full shotgun shell to the face while they're face down in a pile of stun batons. bORA ORA ORA
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Xenomorph
Ensure the crew gets a face full of alien wing-wang. Break procs. Squander your chance to be a big, purple killing machine and abandon your race's survival in favor of acting out the Curator's favorite porno. Become the queen and immediately regret being a slow, fat fuck. Babysit the assistants as they gestate for nine months. Get unceremoniously killed by a welder-wielding assistant dragging a plasma canister. bHard
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Spiders
Pick one of several fashionable spider variants, all of which die to an open window. Drag corpses into the nest so whoever is playing the broodmother can take a break from shitting eggs for 20 minutes straight and shit a purple egg instead. Waste all the purple eggs on vipers, go extinct. Respawn endlessly until the crew bombs themselves out of desperation. Complain in deadchat about not being able to ventcrawl anymore. bEasy to Medium
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Revenant
Shock lights. Transmit WGW right into the Curator until he goes mad. Hack every bot on the station. Materialize long enough to tell the crew what deadchat is saying about them. Walk into holy water and die. Grief Medbay. Convince the Clown to build a giant pile of sharp objects, then sprinkle your special juice on them and watch him become a pincushion. Trade for the role until admins gods get fed up and drone strike you. bEasy
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Nightmare
Jaunt. Murder people and crush the flare exploit! Jaunt. Make the lights your bitch! Jaunt. Jaunt into light! Jaunt. Be validhunted by everybody on the station for your organs! Jaunt. Jaunt into stunbaton! Complain in deadchat. bHard
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Space Ninja
Make the AI spend five minutes fixing the security records. Touch the cyborgs inappropriately. Summon an even worse side antagonist. Roleplay as an edgelord, then dash into the turbine gas chamber. Break open every blue and red door on the station. Commit terrorism, but only in the janitorial closet. Be beaten to death by a mob of angry scientists for getting your dorito-covered gloves on their research computer. bHard
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Slaughter Demon
Hunt down and kill the wizard who summoned you. Eat bodies out of the Morgue for health. Drag bleeding monkeys through the hall. Make the janitor happy by making him become the most important job for a while. Be unable to bloodcrawl due to all the blood being cleaned up. Eat the janitor. RIP AND TEAR! bMedium
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Pirate
Try to raid the station. Fail miserably because the entire crew is out for your blood so they can re-roll for antag. Park your ship outside security. Have a single cyborg enter your ship and build walls. Turn on your booty detector, have the entire crew come for your booty. Wave around your cool scimitars. bHard
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Sentient Disease
Try to infect people. Snowball off of one lucky transmission into an unstoppable deathplague, or be trapped in a mask-wearing felinid for twenty minutes until you're sighted and cured immediately, with absolutely no in between. Get the virologist lynched. Get the CMO lynched. Get the rest of medbay lynched. Make everyone grow funny beards. If they complain, turn them into flaming, rotting, blind, deaf, rapidly mutating corpses with funny beards. Name yourself after either a popular media franchise, a bodily function, a shitpost, or COVID-19. bHard
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Obsessed
Try to act creepy and shifty. Fail because everyone's already a miserable bastard in this shithole. Come up for excuses to stalk the clown. Contract deadly diseases from hugging people. Lie in bed in dorms and think about your catgirl co-worker until you kill yourself from depression. bMedium
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Fugitives
Lead the Hunters on a chase around the station. Total the clown into the Supermatter while doing so. Hope you spawn as Waldo, then hope nobody kills you for being Waldo. bMedium
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Hunters
Wave your weapons wildly around. Shoot the Fugitives for resisting. While you're at it, shoot the entire crew for resisting. bHard
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Space Dragon
Burninate the assistants peasantry. Place your rift in Engineering, then abandon it. Fill the station with carp corpses. Have the shuttle called, arrive and depart long before you could possibly come close to succeeding. Name yourself after your own scalie fursona. Get unceremoniously killed by an assistant wielding an improvised shotgun. bMedium
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Elite Mobs
Kill the fools who awakened you. Be killed by a powergaming miner with top level megafauna loot who built an arena specifically to kill you better. Trash the mining base! Surf on lava. Illegally resettle on the station. Communicate entirely in *flips and *spins. bMedium
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Sentient Slime
Die to anybody with a fire extinguisher. Die to a hull breach. Kill yourself because you spawned in a sealed supermatter chamber. If you survive, break into genetics or virology to eat monkeys for 5 minutes, then effortlessly kill a single murderboner with your six hour long hardstun. bVery Hard
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Regal Rat
Sit atop a pile of treasures! Summon an army of rats to do your bidding, hoard massive amounts of cheese, nibble upon wires (and piss off Engineering in the process), spread pestilence, and incorporate the puny humans into your biomass. Get captured, and watch the crew become extravagantly wealthy off of shipping your bodily fumes to Centcom. bEasy
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Paradox Clone
Appear in this reality due to a freak bluespace-time anomaly. Decide the logical first course of action is to KILL this reality's version of you. Run straight into the room with your alternate self, kill them, then scream about how they were the clone. Be the alternate timeline version of the Captain and give the Clown your alternate timeline ID. THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE!!! bHard

Depreciated Antagonists

These antagonists, for one reason or another, are no longer in the normal gamemode rotation. Beware: these antagonists may appear due to malevolent Space God shenanigans, so don't rule them out entirely.

Job Removal Reason Role Difficulty
Morph.png
Morph
The only way for morphs to appear normally was through someone injecting themselves with the syringe found in the Gluttony Ruin found on Lavaland. The ruin was removed, and as such the syringe is no longer accessible to normal players. Eat pens for amusement. Eat the entire armory. Eat the ore silo. Disguise yourself as Beepsky and uphold the law. Disguise yourself as the Captain, confront the Captain while disguised as him, get shot. Crash the server by dying on the shuttle and filling it with the thousands of useless items you ate. aHard

Removed Antagonists

These antagonists have, for one reason or another, been removed from the game. These antagonists might return one day if they ever get remade or reworked. Although, this is highly unlikely...

Job Removal Reason Role Difficulty
Generic wizard.pngGeneric wizard.pngGeneric wizard.png
Ragin Mages
Not quite an antagonist and more of a gamemode variation on wizard. Spawning up to three or four Wizards simply proved to be too much for the station. One Wizard is destructive enough. Of course, nothing says the admins can't spawn four wizards in a row whenever they want. Spend ten minutes hunting down one Wizard, kill him thinking you've won! Stare in horror as three more Wizards appear. Watch in amusement as they proceed to kill each other. aMedium
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Gangster
A highly controversial and playerbase dividing game mode, the game mode saw dozens of revisions by coders yet it remained essentially either a Revolution round but with round start access to firearms, or a team deathmatch game mode that destroyed any sense of roleplay or immersion. Vandalize the station and get into fights with rivals. Litter the halls with bullet casings. Get ignored by your own gang. Just don't forget: Snitches Get Stitches. aEasy to Hard
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Hand of God
Oh, poor HoG! Shoved out the door buggy, unbalanced, and extremely hard to learn as it combines three gamemodes (hello, gang) into one. Nobody wanted to fix HoG after it's release because of old derelict code that would break even more when poked. While some say it's fun while it's not broken, has that ever been the status quo? Turn someone into !popehat! while they're talking to security. Instakill people with god powers! Build across the station converting people with your !popehat! gang, and get killed instantly by a rod smashing into your nexus. Break the game, over and over and over and get removed. aHard
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Hades, Pope of Sin
Poor guy was implemented into the game as summonable through an item accessible only to wizards. Almost never encountered, when the Dark Seed went away, away went the Pope of Sin with it. Be a general annoyance to the crew. Be a very annoying (need I say it again with time freezing to a halt every minute or so) non-sentient antagonist. Play Russian roulette with the crew manifest. AI Controlled
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Shadowling
Shadowling suffered from issues of it being yet another crew conversion game mode, and was generally unfun to fight against and had a anti-climatic ending. This mode has recently been reworked into the Nightmare side antagonist. Be the hip and more popular brother to the Changeling. Turn the station into thralls. Cry when a cyborg turns on its headlamp. Shadow Walk into space and die ten minutes into the round. bHard
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Cortical Borer
The Cortical Borer suffered from the same problems as the Monkey Mode, being very buggy and one sided at times. Fun for both sides was questionable. No current plans to reimplememt. Crawl in the corroded brain of the clown. Inject meth. Assume direct control. Induce crippling drugs in the clown. Inject meth. Cry when the host eats sugar. Inject meth. Overdose! aVery Hard
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Clockwork Cultist
Poor thing went through more iterations than any other antagonist. In the beginning, it was a blood cult imitator with turrets which was based around converting silicons. By the end, it was a bunch of kidnapping clock golems. Most rounds, it ended in a steamroll either for the cult, or for the crew. In the former case, the cultists would just sit around twiddling their thumbs for 10 minutes, in the latter case, security would bust through and end the cult in 1 minute. Throughout its existence, it was riddled with bugs and other exploits. Examples include:
  • The Eminence teleporting maxcaps into the brig
  • The crew purposely blowing up the SM to deny power to the cult
  • Stargazer spam around the AI sat
  • Cogscarab brass replication exploits

On 4/2/2018, Clockwork Cult was removed from the normal rotation of game modes, with the code for it being taken out a year later. While most of the assets were removed, some remain in the code, and many relics of the Cult can either be replicated with bronze sheets or found throughout the game.

Serve the Clockwork Justiciar by scribbling new-age runes all over maintenance. Start a steampunk book club and kill all the old-fashioned book clubbers. Invoke a bunch of anime people to summon Ratvar. Make everyone absolutely nobody a few people at /vg/ mad by stealing their antagonist. bMedium to Unwinnable Effortless
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Syndicate Mutineer
Overthrow ended up being a damn confusing gamemode. Examples include how unclear it was if the other agent teams were working with or against you, or how the points system worked, not to mention the poor wording of the Overthrown AI lawset. Numerous bugs surfaced that didn't all get fixed, and the gamemode ended up being recognized as one of the least-liked gamemodes after a vote was taken.

Soon after said vote, the gamemode was removed from the gamemode rotation, and later on 7/22/2019 was removed entirely.

Arrive on the station as a Traitor with less gear but the ability to awaken the Syndicate sleeper agent in everybody. Cooperate with other teams to stage the perfect coup (or don't and just fight each other, fuck those guys). Roll up with your posse on a quest to become the most powerful Gang Syndicate team. Ask yourself what the fuck you're supposed to do. aHard
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Hivemind Host
Assimilation was a conversion stealth antag that ended up being extremely hard to counter and was generally unfun to play against. After a community poll many wished to see the gamemode reworked, which was unlikely to happen since the creator and main active maintainer of the gamemode had stopped working on it.

The gamemode and it's related code was removed 7/26/2019.

Stand around in places and add unwitting humans to your hivemind. Hijack the minds of crewmembers and have them do the dirty work for you. Have a random vessel get implanted and security wailing down on you 30 minutes into the shift. aHard
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Devil
Somewhat of a flawed mode, turns out that asking to buy a guy's soul usually makes them want to robust you, because "valid." Usually involved the devil blowing up some crew members and then offering them contracts to be revived. But, despite this, the Gods would occasionally use devils as a interesting midround antagonist with it's final accession ability disabled.

Unfortunately, devil code was old and buggy, and it was decided that it would best be removed on 9/22/2020.

Engage in civil discussions to buy souls. Create emergencies so that people are desperate enough to sell their soul. Try to out wit the lawyer. Get punched to death by someone you just turned into a hulk. bMedium
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Monkey
Original game mode was buggy and usually a steam roll, newer versions were one sided against the monkeys. However, Jungle Fever may make a return someday. Attempt to infect the crew with the monkey virus. Get absolutely crushed by Security within five minutes. Spend the next two hours as a ghost. bVery Hard
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Swarmers
Not terribly fun. While swarmers couldn't directly harm anyone, their whole existence had them running around and griefing the station by dismantling entire areas, and any resistance they met ended in the aggressor being warped away to some far off place cuffed. Playing as a swarmer usually just boiled down to clicking on stacks of iron.

The yellow drones also had the tendency to perma stunlock people with no chance of escape.

Consume. Replicate. Repeat. Eat Telecomms. Teleport other swarmers your enemies away from your metal. Build an army of lemon drones. Leave them to permanently stunlock the clown. Medium
PowderGanger.png
Family
The latest revision was supposed to support a higher level of roleplay compared to the older versions of Families (no more space cops, no hard win/lose objectives, more thematic family types, portable cellphones for family communication). Ironically reverted back to a team deathmatch game mode that destroyed any sense of roleplay or immersion most rounds, even on the roleplay servers. Were the players, administration, or coders to blame? Who knows. Roll with a crew of fellow Saints. Tag turf for Grove Street. Declare that Tunnel Snakes rule! Get beat up by the cops. Tell the Phantom Thieves to play a real shin megoomi tenseh game. Complain in deadchat that Families is bad when you recruited literally nobody the entire round for your Family. aEasy to Hard
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Thief
Introduced as a miscreant level antagonist that wasn't technically a full antagonist, meaning the most they could do is pursue their objective of stealing, hoarding items, etc. This isn't really a problem in itself, but it stagnated creativity on how the average thief played. Additionally, on the regular servers it was confusing for players as while all other antagonists could do whatever they wanted as per the rules, thieves could not. On the roleplay servers, players were overly cautious and would simply complete their objectives without actually committing much crime at all. Steal important items. Steal unimportant items. Hoard items. Steal pets. Steal organs. Steal people. Steal entire rooms. You're a dirty thief; you just can't get enough! aEasy

Special

Job Role Difficulty
Ashwalker.png
Lavaland/Space Role
Die to ash storms. Die to wildlife. Die to an asteroid. Die to lava. Die when a Security strike team teleports into your base. Die to a Miner. Die by getting bored and suiciding. Die to random civilian explorers. Die to other ghost roles. Die in general. If you survive, make a pilgrimage to the station so you can experience racism and die. bHard
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CentCom Official
Be self-important. Meddle with station affairs. Annoy the Captain with bureaucracy. Get killed almost immediately by a random mob. Have your body looted by everyone, including the Captain. Be murdered under suspicion of being a badly-disguised nuclear operative. Watch an ERT/Death Squad avenge you from beyond the grave. bMedium
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Ian
Perform ass inspections. Eat donuts. Get killed, be dragged off to a washing machine and get gibbed, then have your meat turned into a statue of the clown. Cause a riot when an assistant breaks into the HoP office to steal you. Wear funny hats. aImpossible
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Chrono Legionnaire
Erase the Clown from time. Accidently erase your objective from time. Erase Adolf Hitler for the 50th time this week. Be rendered obsolete by validhunters. Wonder if any admins remember you exist. bNever Existed
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Highlander
THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE bMedium
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Emergency Response Officer
Arrive too late on the station to actually help. Lose the rest of your team, get outnumbered and die. Be killed by a single traitor with a double energy sword. Respawn as a second response team to save the first team. bVery Hard
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Death Squad Officer
Beg admins to spawn a deathsquad, spawn in at CentCom, kill the admin who was trying to tell you your mission, get gibbed, beg for another chance. Set your rifle to DESTROY and terminate all lifeforms (including walls). Slip on a banana peel and a̶n̶d̶ ̶g̶e̶t̶ ̶b̶l̶a̶s̶t̶e̶d̶ ̶i̶n̶t̶o̶ ̶o̶b̶l̶i̶v̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶r̶ ̶o̶w̶n̶ ̶r̶i̶f̶l̶e̶ laugh as your boots prevent you from slipping and the Clown can't fire your DNA-locked rifle. Shoot the Clown with your Mateba Revolver. bHard
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CentCom Intern
Do whatever CentCom throws you at. Get confused by your ancient bolt-action rifles. Try to seem cool while only being able to afford ramen noodles. Crush antagonists by sheer numbers. bEasy