Naked Cannibal Extravaganza

[Comrade Leo]

So I bought 'The Forest', and is so far a single player survival game innawoods style similar to that shitfest rust - only difference being instead of being attacked by endless hordes of russian cykas, you instead get attacked by hordes of cannibals.

Attempted my first play through earlier. Got off the plane bewildered, looted some luggage eat some delicious inflight chicken dinners. Had no idea cannibals were meant to show up this early and get chased through a forest by naked men wielding sticks. I lose them eventually and decide to build a shelter, go to sleep to get some energy back, and get interrupted during the night by a pack of naked women covered in blood. They all fuck off except for one bitch who really wants the D, and in fine chav tradition I initiate mating rituals by bashin' her fookin' head in m8. Bitch is rabid at this point and knocks me out. Wake up in a cave (after I have assumed I've been raped), do a runner because I ain't looking to hang around if'n I got 'er up the duff innit. Get half way out the front door before one of 'er bluds mirk me with a club.

Days survived: 0.

All in all had good fun. Well worth it.