The Wizarder 3: A Polish Dating Game

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Sun May 17, 2015 8:01 pm #88746

What the fuck is even going on with this?

People are alternatively optimistic or totally outraged at perceived downgrades on the PC platform?
CDPR fighting with companies over whether keys are legit or not?
People are arguing over whether it's "Jer-ault" (NO!) or "Gare-ault" (YES!)?

What the fuck?

I'm looking forward to it. I thought Witcher 2 was too linear and this looks like Wither 2 + big open free roam.

It seems like everyone went from "THIS IS GONNA BE GOOD!" to "MY ASS HAS EXPLODED IN RAGE!" over the last month for this one though, for one reason or another.

mosquitoman · Post by **mosquitoman** » Sun May 17, 2015 9:05 pm #88762

it's ger - ahlt

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Sun May 17, 2015 9:07 pm #88763

If you just spell it like that someone might think it's the same ger as in German.

It's not.

Kot · Post by **Kot** » Mon May 18, 2015 2:41 pm #89054

Polish doesn't turn G into some inbred J, duh. Polish spelling is ultra-fucking-simple.
Also, people are raging because they removed some graphical shit that was in E3 trailers*, but it's not even close to Watch Dogs level of removing stuff. And I suppose in few weeks (days) we will get a mod or even a patch that bring this shit back. Also, really, it's fucking 11/10 (well, maybe 10/10, since it's buggy but eh, that's gonna get fixed). Seriously, just play this and feel like a superior Slav just for a while.

(*which, considering my shitty PC, I give no shit about, so there's that)

ColonicAcid · Post by **ColonicAcid** » Mon May 18, 2015 11:08 pm #89212

"GERALDDDDDDDD"

Remie Richards · Tue May 19, 2015 4:31 pm

Watching Jesse cox play since he's my goto youtuber for "loot the everything" games with lots of lore.
It looks nice, but I did notice a lot of detail pop-in.
Like in the first scene with Vesemir, it shows a really low poly model and it quickly catches up with itself but it's noticeable and jarring.

mosquitoman · Post by **mosquitoman** » Tue May 19, 2015 6:39 pm #89362

boring generic fantasy shit and pointless gfx masturbation

Kot · Post by **Kot** » Tue May 19, 2015 7:31 pm #89370

mosquitoman wrote:boring generic fantasy shit

It's masterrace slavic fantasy you boring turd.

mosquitoman · Post by **mosquitoman** » Tue May 19, 2015 7:48 pm #89373

Kot wrote:
mosquitoman wrote:boring generic fantasy shit
It's masterrace slavic fantasy you boring turd.

And it's still manages to be painfully generic and uninspired. Just like the novels that spawned this abortion!

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Tue May 19, 2015 7:50 pm #89374

Oooooh, watch for the sharks!

Malkevin · Post by **Malkevin** » Tue May 19, 2015 10:52 pm #89420

An0n3 wrote:What the fuck is even going on with this?

People are alternatively optimistic or totally outraged at perceived downgrades on the PC platform?
CDPR fighting with companies over whether keys are legit or not?
People are arguing over whether it's "Jer-ault" (NO!) or "Gare-ault" (YES!)?

Who the fuck... what kind of retard pronounces it as Jer-ault?
He's not fucking French!

Anyway, all the Witcher 3's existence reminds me of is that I've still not got around finishing the the FIRST game. Damn it I'm such a lazy fuck when it comes to none MP games.

Maccus · Post by **Maccus** » Wed May 20, 2015 3:02 am #89479

Games are good. Novels are retarded.

Spoiler:

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Wed May 20, 2015 4:48 am #89491

I appreciate how the game features a really dark, shitty world without going overboard on UGH ITS SO DEPRESSING AND BLEAK AND BLERGH.

Like sucks. People getting eaten by big scary monsters all the time. Magic users are all assholes. Fantasy races don't get along at all. When the common folks aren't getting shot full of arrows by elves, carried off by monsters, or cursed by evil wizards they still have to contend with bandits and asshole kings going to war over their lands.

...but it still manages to have a sense of humor. People still sing songs and gamble and try to have a good time. There's still life too it. People don't just sit around scared and crying and depressed.

Maccus · Post by **Maccus** » Wed May 20, 2015 8:39 am #89521

I usually hate crafting stuff in games, but I like how it's in this so it shows that Geralt comes prepared for pretty much any situation by mixing up a thousand concoctions of herbs and spices to drink to kill something dead.

On the subject of herbs and spices, that herbalist in the first village.

LunchboxKilla · Wed May 20, 2015 8:49 am

0/10 no blacks, Asians, Jews, Muslims, Spanish or any other color but white people... Muh diver city

Maccus · Post by **Maccus** » Wed May 20, 2015 9:30 am #89526

>No Spanish

Nigga what do you think Nilfgaardians are supposed to be

Did you not get a look at the commander at the garrison?

Maccus · Post by **Maccus** » Thu May 21, 2015 6:45 am #89700

I think probably my favorite thing to do in the little sidequests or whatever is the abandoned villages. Seeing all the villagers move back in after you slice up some fools feels good.

Spoiler:

Malkevin · Post by **Malkevin** » Thu May 21, 2015 8:25 am #89711

Maccus wrote:>No Spanish

Nigga what do you think Nilfgaardians are supposed to be

Did you not get a look at the commander at the garrison?

I would've thought they were meant to be Turks, given Poland's historic problem with kebab invasion.

Post by **Jacquerel** » Thu May 21, 2015 8:31 am #89712

I don't know what European country they represent (it's definitely not Wales) but their names and language are all Welsh

Laharl Monthy · Thu May 21, 2015 10:24 pm

Finished up the first area, then got to finally move to the Hanged Tree.

Let's say that I decided to take a look at the size of the map before doing anything. This is waaaaay larger than I expected it to be, fuck.

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Thu May 21, 2015 10:33 pm #89819

Had a similar impression getting there and then scrolling the map around.

It's a huge fucking map and some of the areas on it are really goddamn dense.

I like that you can't just pick something and then make a beeline to it. If you try to do that you'll definitely go flying off a cliff at some point or trudge right through some bigass monster lair and get fucked. Use the goddamn roads.

It uses the same horse-riding mechanics as Red Dead Redemption, oddly enough. The whole "just push some buttons and the horse will stick to the road for you" bit is cool.

I've tried playing it with M+KB and with a controller and I have to say the controller works much, much, much better.

Quen sign 4 lyfe lol second upgrade gives me vitality back for blocking attacks I'm practically fucking invincible with this shit.

I'm not 100% sure how I feel about how they changed the crafting. Previously you had to make each item as you wanted to use it. I never used oils and bombs because of it, just a few potions. Fuck Alchemy it took too long for too little reward vs. combat upgrades and signs. Now when you make an item you have it for good. If you use it up, you just meditate for an hour, burn some Alcohest, and it replenishes all your potions. Oils are fucking great now you just apply them to your weapon based on what motherfuckers are lurking around and then you get 20+ stabs and slashes of improved damage. They're infinite use. I know some people have complained that this "casualizes" it but I think it's a good change for balance. Alchemy was a bad choice for points previously because you could never be certain if you'd have the items around. eg. Why put points into making your bombs really good when you could just throw more points into the fire sign? Now it's a lot more useful and ever-present. ON THE FLIP SIDE THOUGH it does feel more casual and almost too easy. Once you've brewed something once that's it you're done it's yours forever.

PRO-TIP sell all the weapons you find that you wont use. Not worth breaking them down. DO break down all the clothing items you find that you don't want to use and horde the materials. All that random junk that you find isn't even worth picking up (fishing nets, broken rakes, blunt axes, etc). If you've noticed you've picked some of it up just sell that shit.

Drynwyn · Post by **Drynwyn** » Fri May 22, 2015 6:34 am #89859

Not only am I enjoying this, but it gives me much hope for Cyberpunk 2077. This is because:

-CDPR has figured out how to make a decent combat system

-CDPR has figured out how to make a bigass incredible open map.

Now just do it again a thousand years later or so okay?

Finally- Anon3, as resident Beardlord, what is your opinion of the Real-Time Beard Growth system?

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Fri May 22, 2015 5:00 pm #89919

I wrote a huge post on the real-time beard growth system elsewhere.

Witcher 3 is the greatest game ever made because it has realistic beard physics. It also has dynamic beard growth that accurately represents how a beard grows in over time.

Seriously.

If you get a shave in the game your beard and long hair grow back over time, but not only does it fill in it actually fills in realistically, growing faster on the jawline and upper lip than say the cheeks or neck. It's not just a bunch of flat texture swaps, it's modeled hair that fills out over time. It appears to have some physics to it as well like the hair on your head.

All these magical spells and crazy demons and shit flying around and I'm standing in the middle of a field just staring at the beard like oooooooooooh shiiiiiiiiiiiiit

It adds a bit to the personal narrative you make in what is a big open world game. You head out from a town with the intent of doing all the sidequests and exploring a bit. A few hours of gameplay later you come back covered in monster blood, inventory full of body parts and other goodies, and a fierce ass woodsman's beard. Makes you feel like a total badass.

tl;dr it's fucking great and if games in 2015 can have "realistic breast physics" then I want more realistic beard growth. I'm looking forward to Phantom Pain because Kojima pioneered digital beard technologies with Snake Eater.

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Fri May 22, 2015 7:18 pm #89941

Congratulations, Anon, you are the first person on the Internet to use the phrase 'digital beard technologies'.

My beard's off to y--no, wait, no.

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Fri May 22, 2015 8:04 pm #89962

WELP I FUCKED UP HARD

PLOT SPOILERS AHEAD. MIGHT HELP YOU GET A BETTER RESOLUTION TO SOME SHIT.

Spoiler:

Ricotez · Post by **Ricotez** » Fri May 22, 2015 8:15 pm #89965

I own The Witcher 1

never played it though

Drynwyn · Post by **Drynwyn** » Sat May 23, 2015 4:19 am #89996

An0n3 wrote:WELP I FUCKED UP HARD

PLOT SPOILERS AHEAD. MIGHT HELP YOU GET A BETTER RESOLUTION TO SOME SHIT.

Spoiler:
So them Bog Crones are huge cunts, eating children and all that. They ask you to go kill the heart of the tree up on the hill. I had remembered reading something somewhere that the spirit they had captured in the tree was an even worse piece of shit, but I figured maybe that was some revisionist history since these were the kinds of people who were happily feeding their children to three huge monsters.

I thought it would be a good idea to enlist the help of the spirit in the tree to help fuck over the Crones.

That was a really, really stupid idea. I don't want to give any more away but if you want a chance at a happier ending don't do what I did.

Nah, I did the same thing and was pretty sure of what would happen. No regrets.

Spoiler:

Unrelated: Why the fuck is there a card game, I never asked for a card game.

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Sat May 23, 2015 5:10 am #90006

I think it's there in case you get absolutely fucked and need to earn money somehow when all your shit is broken and you've got nothing to do.

It's kind of ridiculous that I can go to this shithole town in the middle of nowhere and still every random merchant or blacksmith is up for a game of gwent.

Spoiler:

I put points into that stupid arrow deflecting ability so I could unlock the next tier of FOIGHTAN MOVES. I never really thought anything of it until I was in a fight and raised my sword to parry some asshole about to come at me with a sword just in time to deflect an arrow back into the guy who fired it and killed him.

Geralt confirmed medieval Jedi.

Post by **Jacquerel** » Sat May 23, 2015 1:55 pm #90063

Arrows are the bane of my existence honestly
I mean they don't hurt but it's really annoying to have some bastard shooting at you when you're engaged with three other guys

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Sat May 23, 2015 4:51 pm #90069

It doesn't help that Polish genius coders neglected to do collision checks on the arrow for anything but the player model.

Not only will the Archers expertly fire arrows THROUGH their comrades to hit you but their keen marksmanship allows them to burrow arrows through trees, rocks, buildings and the like. Ye olde medieval armor piercing fin stabilized discarding sabot rounds.

Bluespace · Post by **Bluespace** » Sat May 23, 2015 6:52 pm #90092

keira
keira why

Spoiler:

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Sun May 24, 2015 4:18 am #90171

Bluespace wrote:keira
keira why
Spoiler:
WHY KEIRA
WHY DID YOU DO IT
I DIDNT MEAN TO LIFT MY SWORD
SHE JUST WANTED THE NOTES
I DIDNT MEAN TO KILL HER I JUST WANTED HER TO STOP TAKING HER NOTES
THEN I LOST MY TEMPER AND NOW SHES DEAD IN THE MUD ON FYKE ISLE.

WHAT DID YOU DO

Spoiler:

Maccus · Post by **Maccus** » Sun May 24, 2015 6:06 am #90180

Not clicking spoilers because I'm 90% sure An0n3's ahead of me but

Spoiler:

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Sun May 24, 2015 6:13 am #90184

Maccus wrote:Not clicking spoilers because I'm 90% sure An0n3's ahead of me but

Spoiler:
Man screw pestas

You can click this one

Spoiler:

Maccus · Post by **Maccus** » Sun May 24, 2015 6:21 am #90186

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Balut · Post by **Balut** » Sun May 24, 2015 6:41 pm #90262

Maccus wrote:Not clicking spoilers because I'm 90% sure An0n3's ahead of me but

Spoiler:
Man screw pestas

I really liked that quest.

Maccus · Post by **Maccus** » Sun May 24, 2015 11:58 pm #90337

Balut wrote:
Maccus wrote:Not clicking spoilers because I'm 90% sure An0n3's ahead of me but

Spoiler:
Man screw pestas
I really liked that quest.

Spoiler:

DrPillzRedux · Mon May 25, 2015 10:16 am

The feels this game has hit me with. I'm almost done and it's been a wild ride. So much sadness.

[youtube]O5MEgdgTJI4[/youtube]

Post by **Jacquerel** » Mon May 25, 2015 10:53 am #90565

This game seems to expect me to care a lot more about a

Spoiler:

than I actually do.

Maccus · Post by **Maccus** » Mon May 25, 2015 4:02 pm #90623

Not really. Literally none of the characters sympathize with

Spoiler:

at all, even the protagonist.

Kot · Post by **Kot** » Mon May 25, 2015 5:29 pm #90643

Every possible thing told me I can't run it (shit ram, shit graphics, shit cpu, shit everything basically), and yet I'm running it at 60fps with medium details.
Ok.

DrPillzRedux · Tue May 26, 2015 12:45 am

There's only 3 endings, made only of 4 choices.

Guess which ending I got. Fuck me.

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Tue May 26, 2015 1:01 am #90758

Anyone who has finished the game:

Is there a reason to keep holding on to this Kaer Morhen outfit? I upgraded it to the Warrior's Jacket or whatever. The game tells you to hang on to Witcher gear because you can upgrade it, so I've been keeping it ever since in hopes of finding another upgrade for it. I've since moved on to a full Griffin's set for that sign bonus though, and I have been hunting down all kinds of crafting blueprints for other Witcher school's shit.

Just wondering if I should get rid of this thing already or if there's some secret extra bonus upgrade for it for people who were autistic enough to drag this outdated set of gear along with them through the whole game or whatever.

DrPillzRedux · Post by **DrPillzRedux** » Tue May 26, 2015 1:37 am #90771

Get rid of it. Get the Ursine set ASAP unless you like to dodge. There's 4 versions of the Ursine set. You need to go through each of them to get the final one, which looks like so.

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Tue May 26, 2015 1:46 am #90773

No thanks. I'm heavily invested in signs. I don't need heavy armor when I have Quen. I'll just go fishing around for more Griffin pieces and ditch the other stuff. Thanks for the heads up though.

DrPillzRedux · Post by **DrPillzRedux** » Tue May 26, 2015 2:46 am #90792

I went with a fun look anyway near the end. Just fast melee with a duelist look.

Timbrewolf · Post by **Timbrewolf** » Tue May 26, 2015 3:51 am #90803

HONORABRU GERALT SAMA

WATASHI WA "WITCHERU" DESU

[youtube]VMro8GgW42s[/youtube]

Spoiler from /v/

Spoiler:

GODDAMMIT CARLOS

DrPillzRedux · Post by **DrPillzRedux** » Tue May 26, 2015 5:44 am #90814

It's selling well everywhere. Especially Japan. They can't keep that shit in stock.

I highly recommend unlocking the command console when you're finished. It can do some fun stuff.

[youtube]GIFx54eDH-4[/youtube]

Bluespace · Post by **Bluespace** » Tue May 26, 2015 5:50 am #90815

>people have already completed the game.
what
but sidequests

Maccus · Post by **Maccus** » Tue May 26, 2015 6:28 am #90818

>Those people that wear that awful kid-from-Home-Improvement haircut