Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

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Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby DrPillzRedux » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:33 am #164355

DS3 is out for consoles now and people are loving it. Almost everything I've heard so far is that it's the real sequel to DS1. The environment, the direct story ties to 1, the music, and the gameplay take more cues from 1 than 2. The final boss itself is apparently very satisfying and a good fit for the end of the series, even if its concept is very fan fiction-ish. I think it'll be interesting to see what the DLC does.

The final boss theme speaks for itself (spoilered for your safety).

Spoiler:
thot_slayer wrote:don't be a degenerate online if you don't want people to treat you like a degenerate morty

bandit wrote:what is this

a correct post by pillz



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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Incomptinence » Fri Mar 25, 2016 8:14 am #164372

Gonna wait for PC version.

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Drynwyn » Fri Mar 25, 2016 3:51 pm #164405

Yeah, waiting for the real version on the 11th because I don't have a pissfour or xbone
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Lumbermancer » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:39 pm #164407

You can buy me the PC version for my birthday. It's 15th of April. Be there or be square.
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Super Aggro Crag » Fri Mar 25, 2016 11:15 pm #164455

i liked dark souls 2
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby DrPillzRedux » Sat Mar 26, 2016 8:21 am #164568

There's literally an item description for something in 3 that basically says people who liked 2 liked to eat shit.

RIP crag.
thot_slayer wrote:don't be a degenerate online if you don't want people to treat you like a degenerate morty

bandit wrote:what is this

a correct post by pillz

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Incomptinence » Sat Mar 26, 2016 10:49 am #164580

Well I figured out how to get this PS4 controller working wireless with DS2 on my computer now I am somewhat ready I guess.

You would not believe the price of blue tooth dongles in Australia holy shit we invented that technology why.

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby DemonFiren » Sat Mar 26, 2016 11:40 am #164589

DrPillzRedux wrote:There's literally an item description for something in 3 that basically says people who liked 2 liked to eat shit.

RIP crag.


Source?

I don't dooks, but this sounds hilarious.
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non-lizard things:
Spoiler:
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Timbrewolf » Sat Mar 26, 2016 4:14 pm #164612

I said I wasn't going to get hyped for this game after Dark Souls 2

Then people said Miyazaki was back
Then I saw some of the covenant stuff (DAT MOUND YO)
Then I saw some more shit

Then I preordered it with season pass because I'm a fuckboi :(
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Super Aggro Crag » Sat Mar 26, 2016 9:28 pm #164663

DrPillzRedux wrote:There's literally an item description for something in 3 that basically says people who liked 2 liked to eat shit.

RIP crag.

real fucking edgy miyazaki at least dark souls 2 didn't wholesale lift characters and memes from dark souls ones.
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Takeguru » Sun Mar 27, 2016 2:54 am #164726

Fucking consolefags getting it before PC master race

Fucking youtubers flooding my sub box with videos I can't watch without spoiling it for myself

FUCK
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby DrPillzRedux » Sun Mar 27, 2016 7:37 am #164753

DemonFiren wrote:I don't dooks, but this sounds hilarious.


Dried fecal waste material, moist on the inside.

Throw at enemy to inflict toxin build-up, but also ups your own toxicity.

Though the stench makes it difficult to carry on one's person, inflicting toxins on an enemy yields high damage over time. Perhaps some Undead have fond memories of waste. Or, perhaps not.


http://darksouls3.wiki.fextralife.com/Dung+Pie
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bandit wrote:what is this

a correct post by pillz

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Zilenan91 » Sun Mar 27, 2016 7:40 am #164755

I only played Dark Souls 1. What's the exact reference for that?
Spoiler:
Zilenan91 wrote:
Just replace both their arms with chainsaws.

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby DrPillzRedux » Sun Mar 27, 2016 7:51 am #164758

Zilenan91 wrote:I only played Dark Souls 1. What's the exact reference for that?
2 is considered bad by a lot of vocal people. Miyazaki doesn't like 2.
thot_slayer wrote:don't be a degenerate online if you don't want people to treat you like a degenerate morty

bandit wrote:what is this

a correct post by pillz

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Zilenan91 » Sun Mar 27, 2016 7:52 am #164759

Well yeah but how does that connect to Undead liking shit
Spoiler:
Zilenan91 wrote:
Just replace both their arms with chainsaws.

HAVE FUN ESCAPING NOW WITH NO ARMS

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby DrPillzRedux » Sun Mar 27, 2016 7:56 am #164760

Zilenan91 wrote:Well yeah but how does that connect to Undead liking shit


Perhaps some players have fond memories of shit (DS2). Or, perhaps not (a lot of people).
thot_slayer wrote:don't be a degenerate online if you don't want people to treat you like a degenerate morty

bandit wrote:what is this

a correct post by pillz

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Drynwyn » Sun Mar 27, 2016 12:36 pm #164775

I mean that could just as easily be a reference to the fact that dung pies have been in previous games. It makes me think of arcing dung pies to hit the Capra Demon before it makes me think of Dark Souls 2.
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Super Aggro Crag » Sun Mar 27, 2016 1:51 pm #164779

pillz you're a fucking idiot and you're grasping at straws harder than vaati vidya.
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Wyzack » Sun Mar 27, 2016 4:03 pm #164797

I'd sooner eat a full stack of dung pies than play ds2 ever again though :honk:
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Timbrewolf » Sun Mar 27, 2016 4:53 pm #164804

>shitflingers flinging shit over shit that you fling
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby DrPillzRedux » Sun Mar 27, 2016 4:57 pm #164805

Super Aggro Crag wrote:pillz you're a fucking idiot and you're grasping at straws harder than vaati vidya.
meet me on dark souls fuccboi and you will be drinking through a straw
thot_slayer wrote:don't be a degenerate online if you don't want people to treat you like a degenerate morty

bandit wrote:what is this

a correct post by pillz

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Super Aggro Crag » Sun Mar 27, 2016 5:08 pm #164806

DrPillzRedux wrote:
Super Aggro Crag wrote:pillz you're a fucking idiot and you're grasping at straws harder than vaati vidya.
meet me on dark souls fuccboi and you will be drinking through a straw

yeah i'll be using it to suck up your salty fucking bitch tears when your bent over on the ground begging for release and praying your sphincter doesn't completely tear you subhuman
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Zellion » Sun Mar 27, 2016 5:21 pm #164808

I liked dark souls 2, but after playing 3 theres no way I can go back, the controls are too tight and smooth

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Timbrewolf » Sun Mar 27, 2016 5:24 pm #164810

Super Aggro Crag wrote:
DrPillzRedux wrote:
Super Aggro Crag wrote:pillz you're a fucking idiot and you're grasping at straws harder than vaati vidya.
meet me on dark souls fuccboi and you will be drinking through a straw

yeah i'll be using it to suck up your salty fucking bitch tears when your bent over on the ground begging for release and praying your sphincter doesn't completely tear you subhuman


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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby ThanatosRa » Sun Mar 27, 2016 10:57 pm #164864

Settle down, children.
my forum gimmick is that no one knows who i am

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby ColonicAcid » Mon Mar 28, 2016 9:14 pm #165103

Yeah that would not hold up in any sort of essay pillz, sorry buddy, you're pulling at straws.
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Timbrewolf » Sun Apr 10, 2016 5:45 pm #167942

28 hours left until PC release.

Some important new gameplay mechanics you might want to know about in terms of co-op/invasion:

Spoiler:
This game introduces the concept of "weapon burden" or something, not sure what the actual translation is. Basically the highest upgraded weapon you have ever owned is measured against you when it comes time to invade or do co-op. You can't invade or play co-op with anyone who has a lower weapon burden than you. If I upgrade a longsword to +3 and you have never upgraded anything, WELP, I can no longer co-op with you as the host nor invade you. Even if I throw that longsword out, put it away, etc. the game will remember I had a +3 weapon at some point and I'll be locked out from initiating interactions with you until you upgrade. On the flip side, if I have that +3 sword and you haven't upgraded shit, you'll still be able to be summoned into my world for co-op or invade me. So, 0 upgrades is the hot new twink for ganking everyone.
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Wyzack » Sun Apr 10, 2016 5:52 pm #167944

uuuuuuuuughhhhhhhhhh
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Drynwyn » Sun Apr 10, 2016 6:07 pm #167947

At least now ganking requires something resembling skill. And max-upgraded armor, I suppose.

Note to self: Prioritize upgrading armor.
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Timbrewolf » Sun Apr 10, 2016 6:22 pm #167953

Really seems like we've gotten the worst of both worlds here when it comes to that mechanic.

I guess it's okay...? You wont be able to just bring ringers into your world to beat bosses, you should have a slight advantage over anyone who invades you, and invading up to people is going to make you the underdog?

That all sounds good on paper, at least.
Last edited by Timbrewolf on Sun Apr 10, 2016 6:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Wyzack » Sun Apr 10, 2016 6:23 pm #167954

Is the new grief meta dropping +15 swords in front of noobs and tricking them in to picking it up?
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Timbrewolf » Sun Apr 10, 2016 6:25 pm #167955

Wyzack wrote:Is the new grief meta dropping +15 swords in front of noobs and tricking them in to picking it up?


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EDIT: You would have to be host and summon a bunch of people for co-op, and then drop them upgraded weapons to RUIN THEIR LIVES
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Drynwyn » Sun Apr 10, 2016 6:27 pm #167957

Wyzack wrote:Is the new grief meta dropping +15 swords in front of noobs and tricking them in to picking it up?

You don't see any dropped weapon that has a higher bonus than the best weapon you have creates yourself.
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Takeguru » Sun Apr 10, 2016 9:32 pm #167983

Preload started

Ho boy

I went the whole time without a spoiler more serious than knowing a few of the weapons that came back

Fucking staggered releases are cancer
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Incomptinence » Sun Apr 10, 2016 9:58 pm #167990

It has a leeway of 2 levels either way but that mechanic sounds stupid. Not even an inventory check to see if the weapon isn't in storage or chucked? Fucking dumb, hate this poisoned chalice bullshit.

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Drynwyn » Mon Apr 11, 2016 6:59 pm #168152

THREE HOURS LADS

GET HAIPED

Who wants to play Dark Swoles? It's like Dark Souls, but you do 10 push-ups every time you die
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby THE MIGHTY GALVATRON » Mon Apr 11, 2016 7:19 pm #168154

Drynwyn wrote:
Who wants to play Dark Swoles? It's like Dark Souls, but you do 10 push-ups every time you die



Shit son that sounds amazing, I'm going to try that.

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Takeguru » Mon Apr 11, 2016 8:00 pm #168158

I'll probably do something like that

I'll change out push ups for pushing my desk a little closer to it's breaking point for deaths caused by faggot ass invaders, though
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Incomptinence » Mon Apr 11, 2016 9:31 pm #168170

Prolly better to do squats after that spawned enemies hunting you down at the lantern bullshit from the chalice dungeons. Imma onta you from.

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Takeguru » Tue Apr 12, 2016 12:57 am #168195

Looks absolutely stunning

5 deaths so far, most of which were from the first boss that isn't ludlex

OH and one from an invader
Had to take a five minute break because my knuckle caught the edge of the desk and split it open
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Man_Shroom » Tue Apr 12, 2016 12:59 am #168196

there's like 5+ pirating threads on /v/ RIGHT NOW AT 8:57 PM MICHIGAN USA APRIL 11 TWO THOUSAND SIXTEEN

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby THE MIGHTY GALVATRON » Tue Apr 12, 2016 4:11 am #168233

Just hit 30 push ups, woooo! Probably shouldn't have picked deprived, heh.

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby TheWiznard » Tue Apr 12, 2016 4:50 am #168236

something like this but for DS3

Spoiler:
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Incomptinence » Tue Apr 12, 2016 8:04 am #168248

Well turns out going thief and pumping the stupid luck skill doesn't actually make anything good drop or enough firebombs drop so just gonna restart as knight instead of bleeding everything one love tap at a time.

Edit: Well that's much much better.

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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Takeguru » Tue Apr 12, 2016 3:15 pm #168274

I went with Herald

Mainly because I like two handing spears in Souls games
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Timbrewolf » Tue Apr 12, 2016 3:55 pm #168279

Pyromancer in the Mound Makers.

I've made like 20 something vertebrae already.

This covenant is fucking hilarious. I was streaming, some hours of which are on my youtube if you want to see. Will definitely stream more Mound-fuckery again soon. Need to pass out.

Mound Fucker code of conduct
Spoiler:
1) Don't immediately attack the host. If all we ever do is immediately attack the host nobody will ever trust us. We need to be trusted at least a little bit.

2) Sometimes randomly act like a regular phantom. Help the host get to the fog gate then leave. Help him find a bonfire and then leave. This gets people thinking sometimes we're good guys. Which we should be. Sometimes.

3) When shit hits the fan and the fan and the whole fucking rainbow squad is present prioritize murders as follows:
a) Blue Sentinels. These fuckers will always come after you, despite the fact that you were probably just bro'ing around with the host a minute ago. They always seem to come after me. Maybe they get a unique reward? I know we do! Kill a Blue Sentinel and you get a unique forked tongue item.
b) The Host. We're here for a reason. If you aren't the only guy gunning for the Host, you may as well team up now and make it quick. Red + Purple = Friendship Forever.
c) Regular Phantoms/Sunbro's. If you can brutalize one of these guys quickly and get the finishing blow, that's a vertebrae. Ideally you would want to just kill the host, since attacking one of these guys outs you as a jerkwad and there's no going back. If you can choose between the two, kill the Sunbro I guess. Praise this, memelord.
d) Dark Wraiths/Watchers/other Moundfags. Don't fight amongst yourselves. There's plenty of host to victimize for everyone.


I had one CLUSTERFUCK TASTE THE RAINBOW invasion earlier as a Mound-Maker. We had the host, his phantom, a sunbro phantom, then I showed up, then two Dark Wraiths invaded, then a Sentinel showed up. It was FUCKING AWESOME.
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Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby EndgamerAzari » Tue Apr 12, 2016 4:02 pm #168281

So far I'm having fun--by which I mean I keep getting killed by my own incompetence and can't progress, but that's what I was expecting. It's good to be back.
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An0n3 wrote:Fucking crystal ass wind chime lookin' bitch.
Saegrimr wrote:It should be common sense but this is /tg/.

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Drynwyn
 
Joined: Fri Apr 18, 2014 5:09 pm
Byond Username: Drynwyn

Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Drynwyn » Tue Apr 12, 2016 4:51 pm #168288

An0n3 wrote:a) Blue Sentinels. These fuckers will always come after you, despite the fact that you were probably just bro'ing around with the host a minute ago. They always seem to come after me. Maybe they get a unique reward? I know we do! Kill a Blue Sentinel and you get a unique forked tongue item.


They don't get a unique reward, but they get jack shit if the host makes it all the way to the boss fog gate without the invading mad spirit dying- and the rewards for a blue sent summon aren't nearly as good as for a successful boss-kill as a white phantom. So blue sents are strongly incentivized to attack mound-fuckers.
In game, I play the A.I Firmware, the French cyborg C.U.R.I.E, Aubrie Allen, and the lizard scum Skulks-Through-Maintenance.

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THE MIGHTY GALVATRON
 
Joined: Wed Nov 12, 2014 10:17 pm
Byond Username: The Mighty Galvatron

Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby THE MIGHTY GALVATRON » Tue Apr 12, 2016 5:22 pm #168294

I CAN'T FEEL MY BODY!!! HELP!

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Drynwyn
 
Joined: Fri Apr 18, 2014 5:09 pm
Byond Username: Drynwyn

Re: Dark Souls 3 - Fanfiction Edition

Postby Drynwyn » Tue Apr 12, 2016 6:47 pm #168327

THE MIGHTY GALVATRON wrote:I CAN'T FEEL MY BODY!!! HELP!

git gud and die less nerd
In game, I play the A.I Firmware, the French cyborg C.U.R.I.E, Aubrie Allen, and the lizard scum Skulks-Through-Maintenance.

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