JCLL - Rule 0 ban

[Shark-sie]

Byond account and character name: Shark-sie and Mark Kendall
Banning admin: Jcll
Ban type (What are you banned from?): Permanent server ban
Ban reason and length: Permanent : Rule 0 ban, please appeal your recent string of behavior on the forums.
Time ban was placed (including time zone): 2018-03-10 20:23:44
Server you were playing when banned (Sybil or Bagil): Bagil
Your side of the story: As far as the situation that lead up to my banning goes, it feels like a very long time since it happened. The original ban post is here, and if anyone is interested in that specific situation i guess its there https://tgstation13.org/phpBB/viewtopic ... 32#p390032 for all to see. I think what matters more in this ban is not the situation I ended up in at the time however.
The ban I ended up with is a Rule 0 ban, reserved for the biggest nutsacks and assholes that come around to TG, and irredeemably have a good time at other peoples expense. Many other bans could fit, but this one says "You sir are an asshole. The server wants you gone. This is unacceptable."
Why you think you should be unbanned: To be honest, and I know this is not a good thing to write in an appeal, I probably shouldnt be. Not because I dont trust myself to behave like a reasonable adult, but because for the staff that would be involved or responsible for my behavior dont deserve to lose reputation because they gambled on an asshole.
That being said, I am appealing because it has been 5 months now, but honestly feels like a much longer time. I feel like my life has calmed down, and I have left many values behind that led to shallow, and unsportsmanlike behaviors. Looking back, my life was about winning. Winning pixels. Being the last pixel left standing so other people could feel shitty about not being in the game. In my head, and my heart, I had some desire to win even if it cost other people their chance to have fun for the day.

Looking back on these feelings now, and at the behaviors that came with them, they were truly unappealing in someone that is supposed to be an adult. I hope I can say truthfully that I have matured, into something that more closely resembles a 21 year old man than the 10 year old child I was behaving like. Being with a woman that hasnt been a toxic influence in my life, and working in a place where I have been humbled by customers and learned from much older coworkers, I feel like I have been able to refine my sense of self and find satisfaction now in achieving goals with my time, rather than winning in the short term. Games of league are no longer about beating down an enemy team, as long as I can enjoy myself in the time I spend. Playing Runescape is no longer a competition between myself and thousands of people ive never met but want to be better than for no good reason. I hope SS13 is one of those games that I can also turn into something I enjoy, and have fun with, rather than becoming a competitive, childish asshole as I have in the past.

I will say, I completely understand if no one wants to take the chance to vouch for me, or speak up in my favor in fear of agitating the general consensus. If that comes to be the case, rest assured I will take what I deserve knowing full well that I earned it with my own behavior.
If it is the case that you allow me to play on /tg/ again, I would like to ask to be issued an all-jobs ban, minus service jobs that are generally more relaxed and designed to promote roleplay rather than any kind of power play. I hope to work into this slowly, and see if I cant turn my behavior in this game as well into something more mature and enjoyable for everyone, rather than just myself.

[jcll]

Thank you Shark-Sie for making one of the most mature and well thought out ban appeals I have seen. I am glad to see that you have worked on yourself and gotten a better headspace for enjoying SS13 again.

I am going to unban you from the server now and add the requested job bans. Please keep up the good work and I hope you make a great return to the community! But fair warning. IF issues do come back I will not hesitate to reban you and be MUCH less lenient in future.