i am angry about bidets again

bman · Post by **bman** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 9:45 am #443322

Bottom post of the previous page:

how can you walk around with a shitty asshole? fact of the matter is if you're not applying water on your bumbum your ass IS in fact, shitty.

BeeSting12 · Post by **BeeSting12** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 9:57 am #443324

as an american i can say i dont smell shit all day and we dont use bidets commonly here. before someone says im used to the smell from myself, no, i take a shower after i go poo.

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 10:11 am #443328

shower is not enough to reset your sense of smell, if the entire area smells of shit because americans have shitty asshole you won't notice it unless you spend a few days somewhere without shitty assholes in your immediate surroundings. Just ask any Indian if they smell poo all day, they don't, because they live in poo

bman · Post by **bman** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 10:16 am #443330

el anus la poopoo...... el americano......

FantasticFwoosh · Fri Oct 05, 2018 10:17 am

bman wrote:how can you walk around with a shitty asshole? fact of the matter is if you're not applying water on your bumbum your ass IS in fact, shitty.

I like that you think & worry about our collective shitty assholes, but buy me dinner first.

bman · Post by **bman** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 11:10 am #443337

im not worried im absolutely disgusted

Malkevin · Post by **Malkevin** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 11:36 am #443338

Gun Hog wrote:You can get a washlet (bidet that replaces your toilet seat) for about $300-$400 USD if you want fancy electronics, heated seat, and a dryer, or get a cheap one that just sprays water for $50 USD. If you ARE going the cheapo route, at least buy one that can take a hot water line. I cannot imagine how traumatizing shooting ice-cold, high pressure water directly into a virgin anus would be for an American!

A friend of mine has one of these, can confirm: it is the future.

Kraso · Post by **Kraso** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 11:49 am #443340

wubli wrote:lavate el orto gallego de mierda dejá de hacerte el pelotudo me voy a las manos

FantasticFwoosh · Fri Oct 05, 2018 12:02 pm

bman wrote:im not worried im absolutely disgusted

Not to deny you didn't stop thinking about it.

Tlaltecuhtli · Fri Oct 05, 2018 12:08 pm

isnt this peak american mentality? take a shit and then take a shower "later" just like debts ahah buy house now and then spend the rest of your life paying debts

Post by **Togopal** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 12:30 pm #443346

Internally lol'ing because the same people who think americans smell like shit for not owning bidets are the same people who would be in constant fear of getting shot if they came here

Cw3040 · Post by **Cw3040** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 12:36 pm #443349

Togopal wrote:Internally lol'ing because the same people who think americans smell like shit for not owning bidets are the same people who would be in constant fear of getting shot if they came here

this

but really, why a bidet when you can just put a gallon of water up your ass when you shower daily like a normal human being

BeeSting12 · Post by **BeeSting12** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 12:41 pm #443351

Togopal wrote:Internally lol'ing because the same people who think americans smell like shit for not owning bidets are the same people who would be in constant fear of getting shot if they came here

lol yeah.

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 1:16 pm #443355

Most foreigners wouldn't tell an American he smells like shit to his face because they're polite, also they may not even realize the smell is coming from all the dirty assholes and just think it's pollution, sewer air or something

Lumbermancer · Fri Oct 05, 2018 1:38 pm

Togopal wrote:are the same people who would be in constant fear of getting shot if they came here

The first time ever I heard gunfire in public was in USA.

Post by **Togopal** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 1:42 pm #443361

Lumbermancer wrote:
Togopal wrote:are the same people who would be in constant fear of getting shot if they came here
The first time ever I heard gunfire in public was in USA.

Where were you?

Lumbermancer · Fri Oct 05, 2018 1:44 pm

Five minute drive from atlanta int airport.

Post by **Togopal** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 1:47 pm #443363

Was it around here?

Lumbermancer · Fri Oct 05, 2018 1:55 pm

Police was involved.

Fri Oct 05, 2018 1:56 pm

Post by **Togopal** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 1:57 pm #443371

Lumbermancer wrote:Police was involved.

Well that's certainly an important piece of information to leave out!

obscolene · Post by **obscolene** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 3:54 pm #443399

What if the reason there is an abundance of school shootings in America is because all of the poo poo fumes are making the kids nutty like they're huffing jenkem 24/7

wubli · Post by **wubli** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 4:49 pm #443413

Togopal wrote:Internally lol'ing because the same people who think americans smell like shit for not owning bidets are the same people who would be in constant fear of getting shot if they came here

unironically fuck you, togopal.

Post by **Togopal** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 4:53 pm #443414

wubli wrote:
Togopal wrote:Internally lol'ing because the same people who think americans smell like shit for not owning bidets are the same people who would be in constant fear of getting shot if they came here
unironically fuck you, togopal.

Where is the lie

wubli · Post by **wubli** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 4:57 pm #443415

Togopal wrote:
wubli wrote:
Togopal wrote:Internally lol'ing because the same people who think americans smell like shit for not owning bidets are the same people who would be in constant fear of getting shot if they came here
unironically fuck you, togopal.
Where is the lie

what a dick, just fuck off

iksyp · Post by **iksyp** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 4:58 pm #443416

Togopal wrote:Internally lol'ing because the same people who think americans smell like shit for not owning bidets are the same people who would be in constant fear of getting shot if they came here

he isn't wrong

wubli · Post by **wubli** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 4:59 pm #443418

>no one ever said that
yeah ok lmao

CreationPro · Post by **CreationPro** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:02 pm #443420

this went places

wubli · Post by **wubli** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:04 pm #443421

the point is: properly clean yourselves or acknowledge that you aren't clean thanks stop trying to find excuses
no one smells like shit because they wiped it off, still doesn't make it clean or else you wouldn't wash when you got mud on you

teepeepee · Post by **teepeepee** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:05 pm #443422

man I wish we had 2nd ammendment, why did we justcopy the dumb preamble from your constitution and not all the good stuff > : (

CreationPro · Post by **CreationPro** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:08 pm #443423

wubli wrote:the point is: properly clean yourselves or acknowledge that you aren't clean thanks stop trying to find excuses
no one smells like shit because they wiped it off, still doesn't make it clean or else you wouldn't wash when you got mud on you

It's a matter of how perfectionist you are about it, really

You get greasy back in about 3 hours because that's how body works, just a little sweat and your previous shower is already fucked
You could take a shower every 3 hours or you could say "yeah whatever" and shower once or twice a day.

Or you can say "fuck it lmao" and shower once a week/month/year/decade, you do you I guess

Lazengann · Post by **Lazengann** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:10 pm #443424

I get mud on my hands constantly and the dirt just kind of wears off after a while, I don't always wash them

wubli · Post by **wubli** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:13 pm #443425

it's not clean, you will survive but it's still not clean laz that's the point

CreationPro · Post by **CreationPro** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:17 pm #443427

wubli wrote:it's not clean, you will survive but it's still not clean laz that's the point

14 second mark

Spoiler:

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:18 pm #443429

we're not talking about sweat. This is shit, you're literally going around with SHIT STAINS on your body holy christ, and you usually shit what, 3 times a day? It's not so hard to wash your ass if you're at home or use wet wipes if you're at work. Bidet makes it easier to wash it, that's all. Sure, you can shower, but sometimes you need to shit after that and bidet is just faster. Also pointing the shower nozzle at your shitty ass is a bad idea, shit bacteria could get on it and then on your face (or someone elses in your family) when it's used to wash the head

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:20 pm #443430

>shit three times a day
literally how
I shit once every three days or something

iksyp · Post by **iksyp** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:21 pm #443431

Grazyn wrote:we're not talking about sweat. This is shit, you're literally going around with SHIT STAINS on your body holy christ, and you usually shit what, 3 times a day? It's not so hard to wash your ass if you're at home or use wet wipes if you're at work. Bidet makes it easier to wash it, that's all. Sure, you can shower, but sometimes you need to shit after that and bidet is just faster. Also pointing the shower nozzle at your shitty ass is a bad idea, shit bacteria could get on it and then on your face (or someone elses in your family) when it's used to wash the head

you literally do not know how to wipe your ass properly if you leave shit stains on your body

wubli · Post by **wubli** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:23 pm #443432

who the fuck does it three times a day are you ok

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:25 pm #443433

iksyp wrote:
Grazyn wrote:we're not talking about sweat. This is shit, you're literally going around with SHIT STAINS on your body holy christ, and you usually shit what, 3 times a day? It's not so hard to wash your ass if you're at home or use wet wipes if you're at work. Bidet makes it easier to wash it, that's all. Sure, you can shower, but sometimes you need to shit after that and bidet is just faster. Also pointing the shower nozzle at your shitty ass is a bad idea, shit bacteria could get on it and then on your face (or someone elses in your family) when it's used to wash the head
you literally do not know how to wipe your ass properly if you leave shit stains on your body

>see dog shit on the pavement
>thrust hand into it
>put shitty hand behind back so that you don't see it
>use paper to wipe your hand until you're reasonably sure it's clean
>go about your day

This is America

wubli · Post by **wubli** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:27 pm #443434

don't catch you slippin' up

iksyp · Post by **iksyp** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:27 pm #443435

Grazyn wrote:
iksyp wrote:
Grazyn wrote:we're not talking about sweat. This is shit, you're literally going around with SHIT STAINS on your body holy christ, and you usually shit what, 3 times a day? It's not so hard to wash your ass if you're at home or use wet wipes if you're at work. Bidet makes it easier to wash it, that's all. Sure, you can shower, but sometimes you need to shit after that and bidet is just faster. Also pointing the shower nozzle at your shitty ass is a bad idea, shit bacteria could get on it and then on your face (or someone elses in your family) when it's used to wash the head
you literally do not know how to wipe your ass properly if you leave shit stains on your body
>see dog shit on the pavement
>thrust hand into it
>put shitty hand behind back so that you don't see it
>use paper to wipe your hand until you're reasonably sure it's clean
>go about your day

This is America

no one does this you use a bag as a glove and then pick up the shit, afterwards you wrap the bag up all without touching the excrement
and if it gets on your hands you wash it using this magical device that i bet you euros don't know about called a sink

SaveVatznick · Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:29 pm

I shall say again - they shy from the natural odors of the body, they are fearful, and they seem to misunderstand all things, from wiping to guns!
To them, even the smallest mote of dust becomes a beam!

What are the "Bideters" but whiny?

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:30 pm #443437

lol I forgot americans don't eat fibers so they rarely, if ever, poop

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:31 pm #443438

Grazyn wrote:lol I forgot americans don't eat fibers so they rarely, if ever, poop

I'm not american

wubli · Post by **wubli** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:31 pm #443439

>whiny
i just like being properly cleaned up and am unable to understand why others wouldn't want the same

i honestly bet that if you actually tried one you'd love it

edit: i'm SOUTH american

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:34 pm #443440

DemonFiren wrote:
Grazyn wrote:lol I forgot americans don't eat fibers so they rarely, if ever, poop
I'm not american

lol germans, with their notoriously easy to digest food

iksyp · Post by **iksyp** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:36 pm #443441

Grazyn wrote:
DemonFiren wrote:
Grazyn wrote:lol I forgot americans don't eat fibers so they rarely, if ever, poop
I'm not american
lol germans, with their notoriously easy to digest food

the state of europe

SaveVatznick · Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:38 pm

Imagine, for a moment, my fellow men and women, what would become of these "bideters" should hardship fall upon them, and all convenience of modern life fall away?

Suppose we should be transported to the times of Caine, and there be no flowing water save for that of the stream, and certainly no bidets. Would they so refuse to defecate, and live a life of constant constipation for fear of every day filth? Would they refuse to hunt the creatures of the earth for fear of the dangers of weapons?

Or, suppose the great fabled plague of ghouls and walking dead come upon us, and Madagascar close up its ports, and all running water in the plumbing ceases, and the land becomes one of "every man for themselves". The wiping man shall persist in such times, shooting the zombie, and wiping after he goes, while the bideter would cower in fear.

Tell me, who would you trust in a time of great struggle. An upstanding wiper, or a whiny bideter?

CreationPro · Post by **CreationPro** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:39 pm #443443

Grazyn wrote:we're not talking about sweat. This is shit, you're literally going around with SHIT STAINS on your body holy christ, and you usually shit what, 3 times a day? It's not so hard to wash your ass if you're at home or use wet wipes if you're at work. Bidet makes it easier to wash it, that's all. Sure, you can shower, but sometimes you need to shit after that and bidet is just faster. Also pointing the shower nozzle at your shitty ass is a bad idea, shit bacteria could get on it and then on your face (or someone elses in your family) when it's used to wash the head

How normal people wipe:

NSFW:

How Grazyn wipes:

NSFW:

Grazyn · Post by **Grazyn** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:44 pm #443444

lol thanks for taking the time to make a convenient drawing

the point is, it doesn't matter if the shit stain is small. Bacteria are small. And shit bacteria can be LETHAL. Maybe not to you, but you could pass it over to someone else, that's how e. coli gets into food and from there it's a toss up, you either get a little sick or you die in agony

CreationPro · Post by **CreationPro** » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:46 pm #443445

Grazyn wrote:lol thanks for taking the time to make a convenient drawing

the point is, it doesn't matter if the shit stain is small. Bacteria are small. And shit bacteria can be LETHAL. Maybe not to you, but you could pass it over to someone else, that's how e. coli gets into food and from there it's a toss up, you either get a little sick or you die in agony

>tfw you rubbed your anus on your friend's food
Pranked!

>tfw your friend eats your ass and catches e.colie
Pranked!