Stories of rage, tears and regret

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Fri Jun 17, 2016 6:09 am #187434

Bottom post of the previous page:

No u.

Not reading through this wall of text the most obvious solution seems to be a somewhat short-term warning before ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROL that allows the mind control target to, say, strip and self-cuff or report to security for temporary containment or shit like that.

ShadowDimentio · Tue Jun 21, 2016 5:32 am

>Be golem
>Get cucked by goliath and legion right outside spawn
>Respawn
>Repeat three times
>Sob
>Hear something about Hitler
>Orbit
>Hitler's at HQ
>"Do you want to be Hitler?"
>Only every day of my life
>Be Hitler
>"Go be the best pet"
>????????????
>Ok?
>Arrive on station
>Get lynched in nanoseconds by a cargo tech with a sword
>Sob deeply
>HQ is outraged, sends in a team to save Hitler and deal punishment
>"Do you want to be a nuker?"
>Only every day of my life
>Be a nop
>Leader is a dummy and keeps handing out TCs without everyone having their uplinks in
>Have a ton of TCs
>Buy everything I need and then some, a shield, thermals, SMG, noslips, adrenals, it's a party
>Hurry things along and arrive on-station with ten minutes till the shuttle
>Sprint to the disk
>Cap doesn't have it, it's on the table
>Nab it and debate taking the locator
>Decide not to and sprint to grab the nuke
>Start arming and see a guy in stolen captain gear approaching
>Take out my pistol instead of my smg thinking I won't need it
>Get batonned and KO'd by his sword
>Is it..?
>IT'S THE GUY WHO KILLED ME AS HITLER!!
>Die
>Sob eternally

Everything is terrible forever. Getting dunked thrice in a round? Unheard of...

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 6:11 am #188657

ShadowDimentio wrote:Everything is terrible forever. Getting dunked thrice in a round? Unheard of...

Not that unheard of.

IcePacks · Post by **IcePacks** » Thu Jun 23, 2016 1:56 am #189171

>head of security
>cruising around doing my loose cannon thing
>captain's a bitch
>some dude walks up to me
>attempts to address me
>nah i ain't falling for that shit
>shoot him in the legs
>stop myself before i shoot him too much in the legs like a champ with my intense willpower
>captain watches me harmbaton him once later
>I AM FIRING THE HOS
>fuck
>arrest a guy as i notice my wanted status
>arrest him anyways because he's being a fucking moron and not listening to me
>fuck telling this story i tell you what i'm gonna skip ahead
>MUTINY HAPPENS
>jump the slutsec warden in her office
>drop her with disablers like a champ
>start lasering her, because i'm done dealing with this loser
>laser the everloving fuck out of her
>OKAY WE'RE DON-
>she gets up
>shoots at me
>fuck
>fall back into armory, shoot at her and connect after getting lightly beaten
>empty three laser guns into her
>OKAY WHO ELSE WANTS TO CHALLE-
>she gets up again
>shoots me again with taser
>die
>ahelp asking how a warden survives a gazillion lasers
>WHAT THE FUCK
[youtube]m_UGIYtcigU[/youtube]

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Thu Jun 23, 2016 12:18 pm #189245

JUSTICE cares not for damage values.

Zilenan91 · Post by **Zilenan91** » Thu Jun 23, 2016 3:53 pm #189323

I guess the damage was runtiming or something

Malkevin · Post by **Malkevin** » Thu Jun 23, 2016 5:02 pm #189339

Maybe someone thought it was a good idea to make regen viruses stack again.

Zilenan91 · Post by **Zilenan91** » Thu Jun 23, 2016 5:04 pm #189340

No, the pastebin shows that they're getting hit but absolutely no damage is being taken. That's runtimes.

IcePacks · Post by **IcePacks** » Thu Jun 23, 2016 11:43 pm #189436

this was a few hours ago so the round's probably still wrapping up but here goes!

>round starts
>assistant
>oh no i didn't get antag better try again later
>well that's fine i'm gonna pull of a crazy heist for something really dumb and insignificant
>nah that's dumb i'm gonna kill myself with a welding tank
>grab a tank and drag it into a hop line at maximum capacity, cackling madly and killing everyone
>just kidding scream gibberish, stand next to a welding tank in tool storage, and wait for everyone to clear out
>mime in the doorway
>whatever it's just a mime
>ker boom
>unconcious
>there's an arm on top of me though
>oh and i blew a hole in the floor that's no good
>people start running into the room
>what the fuck are you idiots doing
>people getting sucked into the hole like colossal fucking idiots
>oh my fucking god i'm gonna kill like half a dozen idiots with this thing
>fuck
>get up
>with the last vestiges of my strength, grab some metal and make some floor tiles
>repair the ho-
>MIME PUSHES ME OVER, ONLY HAS ONE LEG
>MIME WHAT THE FUCK
>WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK ARE YOU FUCKING DOING AAAAAAAAAA
>PEOPLE RUNNING IN THE ROOM
>WOWWEEEWHOOOHOOYOWZERWHEEE
>I'MMA AHELP THIS SHIT WHY DID YOU KILL ME
>I TRIED PATCHING THE FUCKING HOLE BUT THE FUCKING IDIOT MIME STOPPED ME
>ATMOS TECH RUNS IN, FULL HARDSUIT
>PATCH THE FUCKING HOLE YOU MORON
>IGNORES THE FLOOR TILE
>BWOINK
>OH MY GOD ARE YOU SERIOUS
>YO PAX YOU KILLED HALF A DOZEN INTELLIGENT PLAYERS WHO DID NOT DIE ON ANY FAULT OF THEIR OWN WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF
>UH THEY WERE IDIOTS AND PRACTICALLY JUMPED INTO THE FUCKING HOLE AND I TRIED TO REPAIR IT AND OH MY GOD
>SOME IDIOT HAS DIED TWICE TO THE FUCKING HOLE
>DEFIBBING DOCTOR OUTSIDE
>TAKE THE RIDE OF YOUR LIFE IN THE 1X1 HOLE TOO HARD TO FUCKING FIX
>THE FLOOR TILES ARE ON THE FUCKING GROUND IN THE HOLE

>banned for a day because /tg/ players can't handle a 1x1 hole with some fucking floor tiles in it

ShadowDimentio · Fri Jun 24, 2016 12:46 am

>People try to deny the h u g b o x

ADMIN I DIED BAN THE MEANIE WHO KILLED ME

IcePacks · Post by **IcePacks** » Fri Jun 24, 2016 1:06 am #189480

talking to bgo, several of the players killed actually ahelped it

they ran through an airlock hopped in a hole opposite said airlock, and didn't even bother to so much as wear internals before ahelping

this was not a well-meaning admincan helping out a few clueless jamokes this is said jamokes killing themselves and then blaming me for it

smittn · Post by **smittn** » Fri Jun 24, 2016 1:38 am #189487

>pax suicides with a welder and braindead hubbies die
>gets banned
>i get betagrudge nonantag killed from a previous round, my corpse spaced so I wasn't able to be cloned and they're not banned
STILL UPSET SAWU

Also I was there can't believe they banned you for that, smells said it was a suicide hole and everyone I tried to pull out there flailed out of my grasp like a bunch of idiots. Who banned you?

IcePacks · Post by **IcePacks** » Fri Jun 24, 2016 1:53 am #189490

slip king bob dobbington, ironically enough

Jacough · Post by **Jacough** » Fri Jun 24, 2016 2:28 am #189492

If you're going to be one of them faggots who kills themselves when they don't get antag and you want to do it in a spectacularly stupid fashion do it somewhere basically nobody bothers going to like the incinerator, maint bar, or if you're just trying to be an attention whore do it in the holodeck. People use that like once in a full moon these days. Don't do it in a room people actually use.

smittn · Post by **smittn** » Fri Jun 24, 2016 2:32 am #189494

>auxilery storage
>used
pick 1

IcePacks · Post by **IcePacks** » Fri Jun 24, 2016 2:46 am #189495

Jacough wrote:If you're going to be one of them faggots who kills themselves when they don't get antag and you want to do it in a spectacularly stupid fashion do it somewhere basically nobody bothers going to like the incinerator, maint bar, or if you're just trying to be an attention whore do it in the holodeck. People use that like once in a full moon these days. Don't do it in a room people actually use.

these are points i will concede, unintentional hole-creation and airlocked room aside

that and the mime's de-limbing are the things that make me feel like an actual asshole about this rather than a lynchpin

Whoisthere · Post by **Whoisthere** » Fri Jun 24, 2016 6:16 am #189560

I actually walked in to kill myself in the hole because I saw a bunch of bodies and thought it was funny.

Then I got defib'd and walked back in because I needed to leave the game anyway.

I have a hard time imagining someone accidentally dying, not using the hole to suicide, there.

I mean there's a 1 tile hole in a locked room. The hole is visible from outside.

ShadowDimentio · Fri Jun 24, 2016 7:16 am

>Be HoS
>Gear up as usual
>Critfail my open box roll so catastrophically that reality trembles and mindshield implants begin fluctuating throughout existence
>The implants in the box are visible but taking them out gives nothing and looking back in the box shows the implant is back in there
>Implants are summoned but when I pick them up they cease to exist
>Spooky
>Nanotrasen Bluespace Anomaly Research is contacted and the box is taken for research
>Eventually get /killed by clockcucks again
>Cry

>Be traitor a long time ago
>Trade for revenant
>Murderghost it up
>Go to xenobio
>Zap xenobiologist
>Xenobiologist gets hit after critfailing a saving throw
>They fall through time and space into the void
>Actually straight up fell to nullspace and died
>Eventually die

Apparently I have secret godlike reality powers or something because this sorta shit keeps happening to me

Reece · Post by **Reece** » Fri Jun 24, 2016 9:32 am #189603

>be me.
>You are the average UK citizen.
> See cucks vote to leave.
> *suicide.
> ghost chat filled with salty ancestors.

Anonmare · Post by **Anonmare** » Fri Jun 24, 2016 10:11 am #189605

Wrong thread Reece, that's for the awesome thread.

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Fri Jun 24, 2016 11:34 am #189628

In terms of humourous impact and pain experienced by the affected it's the equivalent of an engineer locking himself in the containment grid.

Reece · Post by **Reece** » Fri Jun 24, 2016 2:42 pm #189707

Hopefully Americajust adopts the UKas a new state and brings history full circle.

IcePacks · Post by **IcePacks** » Fri Jun 24, 2016 8:17 pm #189790

Whoisthere wrote:I actually walked in to kill myself in the hole because I saw a bunch of bodies and thought it was funny.

Then I got defib'd and walked back in because I needed to leave the game anyway.

I have a hard time imagining someone accidentally dying, not using the hole to suicide, there.

I mean there's a 1 tile hole in a locked room. The hole is visible from outside.

oh my god it was you

amid all the chaos and hilarious non-response to the 1x1 fucking hole in the floor i was all like "WHY DOES THIS FUCKING IDIOT KEEP KILLING THEMSELVES"

Reece · Post by **Reece** » Sat Jun 25, 2016 10:18 am #189925

IcePacks wrote:this was a few hours ago so the round's probably still wrapping up but here goes!

>round starts
>assistant
>oh no i didn't get antag better try again later
>well that's fine i'm gonna pull of a crazy heist for something really dumb and insignificant
>nah that's dumb i'm gonna kill myself with a welding tank
>grab a tank and drag it into a hop line at maximum capacity, cackling madly and killing everyone
>just kidding scream gibberish, stand next to a welding tank in tool storage, and wait for everyone to clear out
>mime in the doorway
>whatever it's just a mime
>ker boom
>unconcious
>there's an arm on top of me though
>oh and i blew a hole in the floor that's no good
>people start running into the room
>what the fuck are you idiots doing
>people getting sucked into the hole like colossal fucking idiots
>oh my fucking god i'm gonna kill like half a dozen idiots with this thing
>fuck
>get up
>with the last vestiges of my strength, grab some metal and make some floor tiles
>repair the ho-
>MIME PUSHES ME OVER, ONLY HAS ONE LEG
>MIME WHAT THE FUCK
>WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK ARE YOU FUCKING DOING AAAAAAAAAA
>PEOPLE RUNNING IN THE ROOM
>WOWWEEEWHOOOHOOYOWZERWHEEE
>I'MMA AHELP THIS SHIT WHY DID YOU KILL ME
>I TRIED PATCHING THE FUCKING HOLE BUT THE FUCKING IDIOT MIME STOPPED ME
>ATMOS TECH RUNS IN, FULL HARDSUIT
>PATCH THE FUCKING HOLE YOU MORON
>IGNORES THE FLOOR TILE
>BWOINK
>OH MY GOD ARE YOU SERIOUS
>YO PAX YOU KILLED HALF A DOZEN INTELLIGENT PLAYERS WHO DID NOT DIE ON ANY FAULT OF THEIR OWN WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF
>UH THEY WERE IDIOTS AND PRACTICALLY JUMPED INTO THE FUCKING HOLE AND I TRIED TO REPAIR IT AND OH MY GOD
>SOME IDIOT HAS DIED TWICE TO THE FUCKING HOLE
>DEFIBBING DOCTOR OUTSIDE
>TAKE THE RIDE OF YOUR LIFE IN THE 1X1 HOLE TOO HARD TO FUCKING FIX
>THE FLOOR TILES ARE ON THE FUCKING GROUND IN THE HOLE

>banned for a day because /tg/ players can't handle a 1x1 hole with some fucking floor tiles in it

Banned for a day? Jesus, I started a blast furnace plasma fire in a 1x1 glass room I made in the main hall that killed three people and made science/medical full of superheated air that killed another eight people and all I got was a 'you should have secured the window, don't be silly.' and that was it.

Zilenan91 · Post by **Zilenan91** » Sat Jun 25, 2016 11:28 am #189934

I once dragged a supermatter shard into the hallway between medical and the bar as a borg and killed the entire station by accident and I got a note for it. Laughed my fucking ass off because the situation went like this:

>be secborg
>arrest QM who ordered SM shard
>get told to go space it (it was at engineering)
>k
>don't even think once about going someplace other than the escape airlock
>coasting with that shit in the main hallway
>get pushed into it and die
>it chainstuns everyone, spews plasma and everyone dies
>the entire time the admins are laughing with me in ahelps

IcePacks · Post by **IcePacks** » Sat Jun 25, 2016 5:08 pm #190021

"you knew better, pax"

the one line of text that differentiates a pax ban from a player warning

Post by **Armhulen** » Sat Jun 25, 2016 6:48 pm #190050

IcePacks wrote:"you knew better, pax"

the one line of text that differentiates a pax ban from a player warning

i'm triggered so hard right now

InsaneHyena · Post by **InsaneHyena** » Sun Jun 26, 2016 5:59 pm #190293

> Be cargo traitor
> Buy a surplus crate
> A lot of useless shit, amongst it - a storage implant
> Mission - steal documents from the vault
> Break into the vault, take documents, hide them inside my implant
> Head back to cargo, try to figure out how to photocopy the papers just in case.
> See a man riding a mulebot.
> It's Scholo Gaskin
> I and shitload of other people in cargo get run over, chainstunned and killed.
> Schlomo runs over the entire station, and since there is no sec, he faces no resistance at all
> Spend nearly the entire round in genetics, waiting my turn to be cloned
> Schlomo comes by, runs over all those cloned and geneticist.
> FUCK
> Luckily, the guy being cloned at the pod was me, and when I pop out, I put on my things and RUN
> Schlomo's a changeling, he has the EMP scream, and he's heavily armed, because no one protected the armory, since there was no sec.
> Luckily, ERT arrived to help.
> Well, they probably should handle him.
> Shit, I have my papers inside my old body.
> C4 my way into robotics, place my old body on the surgery table, cut out my freedom implant and my storage implant.
> Papers - get.
> Disposal myself into cargo.
> First thing I see upon leaving the chute is a man in bloodied ERT suit recharging his gun.
> And a mulebot closing in
> Oh for fuck's sa-
> Chainstunned, die.

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Sun Jun 26, 2016 6:55 pm #190302

Congratulations, you get why I don't like murderboners or Lumber.

InsaneHyena · Post by **InsaneHyena** » Sat Jul 02, 2016 4:49 pm #192149

> Spawn as a scientist
> TATOR
> Steal the disk!
> Spawn a surplus crate, get adrenals, EMP kit, freedom implant, noslips, slipocalypse, stetchkin
> Time to kill!
> Drop an EMP grenade near telecoms
> Captain is dragging a prisoner to the brig
> Not so fast.
> Pop him full of bullets, steal his PDA, start dragging his body.
> A lawyer sees me.
> Pretend to be dragging his body to medbay
> He doesn't buy it
> SUDDENLY, SHARPENED KITCHEN NIFE
> Escape him, but in the process an engineering borg steals captain's body
> FUCK
> Get a disguise, forge a new identity with captain's ID
> Blow the engieborg as a revenge
> EMP the telecoms again
> Suddenly, "HELGA SVENSON IS A TRAITOR IN DISGUISE WITH A FAKE ID, SHE IS WEARING A LEATHER COAT"
> What.
> How.
> FUCK
> Are you fucking kidding me?!
> Warden sees me near engineering.
> Whips out a taser
> Not so fast.
> EMP
> Her flashes burn out, causing me to be blinded and confused
> FUCK
> Can't stun her while confused
> She takes out a baton
> Okay, escape time.
> Run away to the turbine.
> Engineer finds me and helpfully points out my whereabouts to the warden
> FUCK
> Take out a hand teleporter that I took somewhen before
> Teleport to the bridge
> End up stuck in the wall
> Can't get out
> Due to retarded changes to hand tele, can't teleport out either, because now I need to physically walk through the portal
> Die due to space exposure
> My body is stuck there for the rest of the round.
> FUCK
> Turns out, detective knew I was a traitor, because he checked security records and saw that my false identity isn't listed there.
> Are you kidding me, nobody ever checks those.

Reece · Post by **Reece** » Sat Jul 02, 2016 6:23 pm #192164

I always check sec records. I like to add notes to peoples records.

Jacough · Post by **Jacough** » Sat Jul 02, 2016 8:03 pm #192182

> Be rev head miner
> Flash my two buddies round start
> Mime wanders in, flash him too but he goes braindead as soon as I flash him
> Doing a good job of converting people without being noticed until...
> Mime comes back and immediately decides to turn himself in and get implanted
> Fuck
> Continue flashing people, sometimes getting a tiny bit creative by doing shit like flirting with the female chaplain so I can get up right next to her and convert her
> Things start going downhill, miner revs decided to fuck off to mining instead of helping the revolution and got killed by lavaland mobs
> Find CE by himself in the locker room
> Fuck it going for it
> Sling a bola his way, nail him, and start attacking him with a spear
> He whips out a flamethrower and starts spraying haphazardly
> shoot up with a medipen to give myself a bit of an advantage
> He hits a welder tank and blows that shit up, knocking us both out and igniting residue plasma
> Half the locker room in flames
> We're both rolling to put out the flames
> I get up first, medipen's keeping me in the fight but I'm hurtin
> He's on his last legs
> Grab spear and throw it
> Bounces off him but he's definitely moving slower
> Grab it and throw it at him again
> Where did it-
> He fucking caught it and throws it back at me, gets imbedded
> Drifting in and out of crit at this point
> Try to back off but I'm collapsing over and over
> Kills me
> Guess it's up to the other rev he-
> Round ends, I was the only starting rev head. Miku Frost had been made rev head halfway into the round but was captured before me

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Spoiler:

InsaneHyena · Post by **InsaneHyena** » Sat Jul 02, 2016 8:11 pm #192183

> Engineer
> PRAISE NAR'SIE
> YAY, my forte!
> No white ship memes, no ruskie DJ station memes, because uncle Kor said that only Ratvarcult can do this.
> Tell my cult buddies that I'll build a safe space near singulo containment.
> Do it, though it takes some time and resources.
> We do cult stuff for a while.
> Stun the chaplain, cuff him, teleport him to our base
> There's, like, eight of us there, nearly the entire cult.
> Suddenly, explosion.
> What.
> OH SHIT, NO
> The entire cult is eaten by singulo

Desucake · Post by **Desucake** » Sun Jul 03, 2016 2:51 am #192289

Jacough wrote:> Be rev head miner
> Flash my two buddies round start
> Mime wanders in, flash him too but he goes braindead as soon as I flash him
> Doing a good job of converting people without being noticed until...
> Mime comes back and immediately decides to turn himself in and get implanted
> Fuck
> Continue flashing people, sometimes getting a tiny bit creative by doing shit like flirting with the female chaplain so I can get up right next to her and convert her
> Things start going downhill, miner revs decided to fuck off to mining instead of helping the revolution and got killed by lavaland mobs
> Find CE by himself in the locker room
> Fuck it going for it
> Sling a bola his way, nail him, and start attacking him with a spear
> He whips out a flamethrower and starts spraying haphazardly
> shoot up with a medipen to give myself a bit of an advantage
> He hits a welder tank and blows that shit up, knocking us both out and igniting residue plasma
> Half the locker room in flames
> We're both rolling to put out the flames
> I get up first, medipen's keeping me in the fight but I'm hurtin
> He's on his last legs
> Grab spear and throw it
> Bounces off him but he's definitely moving slower
> Grab it and throw it at him again
> Where did it-
> He fucking caught it and throws it back at me, gets imbedded
> Drifting in and out of crit at this point
> Try to back off but I'm collapsing over and over
> Kills me
> Guess it's up to the other rev he-
> Round ends, I was the only starting rev head. Miku Frost had been made rev head halfway into the round but was captured before me

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Spoiler:
I still had fun and it was an awesome fight at the end

That mime decided to go straight for the cap while I was about to attack him while we were talking, but he failed and hit me, getting capped and ruining my plan.

InsaneHyena · Post by **InsaneHyena** » Mon Jul 04, 2016 3:46 pm #192663

> Spawn as chemist
> Not a HoS? Yeah, that could only mean...
> TATOR
> Hijack the shuttle.
> Buy two eswords, chameleon kit.
> Start murdering.
> Fist kill clown for his slippery pda, drag it around after me and kill people.
> Librarian screams "WAIT, STOP"
> I actually stop
> He's a syndicat to
> Leave him to gather his legs
> Start killing HoP in medbay
> Medborg witnesses it
> He flashes me
> I drop my esword
> FUCK, NO
> He drags my esword away
> FUCK
> Escape from medbay, see cuffed detective with his baton
> Run to escape. batoning detective on the way there.
> AI bolts me there.
> Don't have any way out
> AI gathers a lynch mob by screaming "TRAITOR BOLTED IN ESCAPE"
> What.
> There's a cargotech with my double esword, a janitor with a chainsword...
> AI unbolts the doors and lets them in.
> WHAT
> Try to escape
> AI bolts the doors again, leaving me with people trying to kill me
> WHAT
> Baton the cargotech, he falls on the floor.
> Take my esword back, begin fighting back.
> AI lets a cyborg in, he flashes me and drags my esword away again.
> I'm now defenseless against a lynch mob
> AI bolts me down again
> AI raises bolts, so HoS with his energy gun can come say hello.
> AHAHAHAHAHA, WHAT
> Die.

And this is why I hate silicons.

Reece · Post by **Reece** » Mon Jul 04, 2016 4:20 pm #192670

Did you Ahelp it? Because that's not how you should play silicon. Like at all.

InsaneHyena · Post by **InsaneHyena** » Mon Jul 04, 2016 4:31 pm #192673

Yeah, I did. He didn't have previous history of being a bad AI, so he got away with a note.

Reece · Post by **Reece** » Mon Jul 04, 2016 8:25 pm #192741

InsaneHyena wrote:Yeah, I did. He didn't have previous history of being a bad AI, so he got away with a note.

What a shitrocket.
Oh speaking of silicon. Had this riveting conversation today.
>non violent prisoner says 'decon my window cell'
> Me the engineering borg goes to do so.
> Mining borg: Don't do that, it exposes security.

...So? We're Asimov, who gives a shit. I despise borgs who try and help security, when they existed I never played sec bots because I hated the entire notion of a borg who was specifically designed for this sort of thing, our laws are simple.
Do not cause harm.
Do not refuse an order.
Do not let yourself be destroyed.

What rank you are doesn't fucking matter.

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Tue Jul 05, 2016 7:02 am #192924

Well, I usually played secborg in accordance with my laws, so naturally that means I got ion'd every other round that I did.

InsaneHyena · Post by **InsaneHyena** » Tue Jul 05, 2016 7:49 am #192933

I still can't believe that anyone still thinks that secborgs are a good idea.

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Tue Jul 05, 2016 7:51 am #192936

They're fun.

Just not for anyone other than the people playing them.

confused rock · Wed Jul 06, 2016 11:37 pm

>assistant on meta
>ops declare war
>fuck it
>get letterman jacket and horsehead and stuff
>ask atmos tech for fire axe
>he is too busy trying to break into the ce office but failing so horribly he shocks himself FOUR TIMES, including fucking me HARD with a teslagrille
>smashes a window after and says he is going to space the axe for some reason
>he immediately starts to limp away
>I limp after him
>he chops me with the axe as soon as I get close
>disarm him at extremely low health
>only escape with the axe because I put it on my back and used a disposal chute
>heal
>wait for ops
>suddenly sprints at me with a baton and gets me arrested despite NUKE OPS
>can't explain myself because horsehead
>CAN run away because they forgot to pull me, and do so
>explain my shit over the radio
>he calls me a liar and threatens to kill me
>charges at me with a baton again
>disarm him twice and beat him to death
>people start mentioning the ops coming
>get tele gulagged for 1,000 points because I can't talk with a horsehead as ops attack the station
>admin:"yo stop killing dudes"
>ends with a crew victory with me marooned too

Cayce · Post by **Cayce** » Thu Jul 07, 2016 1:01 am #193575

>I don't have long before work, so I observe and become security on the hotel station thing.
>Decide to play a tourist from another station on SS13, so I teleport in, grab the hand teleporter in SS13's teleporter room.
>Wander about marveling at things.
>Security begin to follow me, so I wander about quicker.
>Detective shoots me and beepsky cuffs me.

>I tell them I'm a visitor from elsewhere and just took the tele so I can return home when my visit is over.
>They tell me that's a lie and accuse me of looting security, despite the fact that I'm wearing the hotel station's blue suit.
>I just wanted to pretend to be a tourist and have fun. ;.;
>Warden drags me to the gulag for 'grand theft'.

>I ghost. I'm salty. I'm salty enough to be Lot's wife.
>Become drone. Get welder.
>Attack warden with welder.
>Die.
>Adminhelp: I did something stupid and I was angry, if you feel its warranted, please dayban me.
>Kor: You know what you did was wrong, it's cool.
>Go to work, fingers still twitching with subdued rage.

DemonFiren · Post by **DemonFiren** » Thu Jul 07, 2016 6:49 am #193628

Didn't you, like, read the big fucking text that tells you not to leave the hotel z-level?

That's whatcha get.

Post by **Atlanta-Ned** » Thu Jul 07, 2016 2:26 pm #193694

Cayce wrote:[acted like a bitch and got hit like one]

Fucking terrible.

Post by **Armhulen** » Thu Jul 07, 2016 3:24 pm #193705

And you took the only security sleeper, J U S T

IcePacks · Post by **IcePacks** » Fri Jul 08, 2016 12:31 am #193840

The unloved rock wrote:>assistant on meta
>ops declare war
>fuck it
>get letterman jacket and horsehead and stuff
>ask atmos tech for fire axe
>he is too busy trying to break into the ce office but failing so horribly he shocks himself FOUR TIMES, including fucking me HARD with a teslagrille
>smashes a window after and says he is going to space the axe for some reason
>he immediately starts to limp away
>I limp after him
>he chops me with the axe as soon as I get close
>disarm him at extremely low health
>only escape with the axe because I put it on my back and used a disposal chute
>heal
>wait for ops
>suddenly sprints at me with a baton and gets me arrested despite NUKE OPS
>can't explain myself because horsehead
>CAN run away because they forgot to pull me, and do so
>explain my shit over the radio
>he calls me a liar and threatens to kill me
>charges at me with a baton again
>disarm him twice and beat him to death
>people start mentioning the ops coming
>get tele gulagged for 1,000 points because I can't talk with a horsehead as ops attack the station
>admin:"yo stop killing dudes"
>ends with a crew victory with me marooned too

who gets tele gulag

confused rock · Fri Jul 08, 2016 3:12 am

me get tele gulag

IcePacks · Post by **IcePacks** » Fri Jul 08, 2016 3:26 am #193871

whenever poo security tries to teleport me instead of getting off their butts and doing it right i run out of the teleporter and through whatever doors they left ajar

Ricotez · Post by **Ricotez** » Fri Jul 08, 2016 1:01 pm #193968

that's why the only fitting punishment for a criminal is to execute immediately

InsaneHyena · Post by **InsaneHyena** » Fri Jul 08, 2016 6:09 pm #194035

> Be HoS
> HoP asks me if he should promote Loves-the-Lizards to security
> Tell him not to do it
> He does it anyway.
> Both singulo and tesla are let loose by incompetent fuckwits from engineering
> Loves gets secutiy gear in my absence, turns out to be sleeping carp tator tot and murders all of security with a stun baton.
> Get cloned
> All of cryoxadone was stolen from medbay, so I'm permamently on the verge of death due to cellular damage
> Move towards the shuttle
> Random assistant on fire stumbles into me
> Fall into crit instantly
> Somebody actually extinguishes me and drags me to shuttle medbay
> Technically survive the round.

I swear, next time HoP promotes someone to sec without my agreement, I'm permabrigging both his protege and the fuckwit HoP.