the grumble thread: disappointed edition

[Donglesplonge]

hello friends, i've been in the happenstance of wanting to make this thread like 3 times over the past 2 days and just never did, so now i'm doing it


ever had a round where someone does something astoundingly stupid or funny that ends either horribly or perfect? have a moment where your sheer disappointment in someones ability is palpable because of something going terribly wrong? share it here because i feed off of funny moments and family guy doesn't put out anymore



please don't use this thread to go "yeah this persons always a fucking IDIOT HERES EXAMPLES!!!!" just share your goober tales with us yknow as they say in books i think spin your yarn

[dendydoom]

one time i forgot to disable the option where not getting a job just gives you a random one and i ended up with curator. i decided to just roll with it and wanted to make the best library ever. so i started expanding it with the help of an assistant, we built tasteful wood floor, seating, shelves, doorways etc out into the halls, into other departments, and the entire time we enforced a no talking policy while in the library. you had to whisper or you were banned. except the library was a pretty sizeable chunk of the station at this point, so getting banned was a big deal.

this entire time i was low level messing with this other guy who kept coming along and breaking my many rules, so i finally decided to ban him from librarytopia, which had now seceded and claimed independence. that assistant turned out to be a traitor who came back and secured a syndie bomb to the centre of my empire. panicked and ready to die for my people (the books), i leapt onto the bomb and it exploded seconds later. gibbed me and sent my entire library down into the z-level below, where no one found my head.

i realized somewhere along the line i was supposed to be disappointed in this but it actually just turned out to be a really good story.

i am drearydoomius, king of kings, look upon my library ye mighty and despair.

[Not-Dorsidarf]

The round before the big site crash we had was fun, there was a shoddy subversion law, I had a gimmick based on it, but then oops server box out.

[kinnebian]

alright, let us set the scene..
perma.
2021.
im a roundstart prisoner- jailed justly for the crime of selling laced bathsalts. When, all of a sudden..
3 new faces join me in the block, one of them blind and in a wheelchair. Clearly brutalized by security.
They all cry innocent, but it falls on deaf ears.. except me!
I give a rousing speech and we make a union, a promise- to escape our cruel tyrants!
We make spears, weapons, soaps. Then we start to break out..
A secoff, Ismael Meatmeat comes in- a robust soul I recognize.. but he starts to wail on us! Therefore, I jump him and take him out with a spear and my bare hands. Covered in blood, we escape in the security lobby- where the warden and HoS are sitting. I yell, and barrel into the HoS. The blind moth manages to spear the HoS by throwing it, narrowly missing me. We back off after killing the HoS, moving to the gulag with their ID.
"We will make a new home in lavaland! Away from the tyranny of Nanotrasen and their beloved security-"

BWOINK!

What a pitiful fool I was. I was just a normal prisoner. I had gotten so caught up in the passion and whirlwind I failed to realize I was just a prisoner and had no antagonist role; yet- I had (almost) singlehandedly killed 3 security members. I apologized, then ate my ban. I know not what happened to the people I led, left alone on lavaland with a husk of a man.

[conrad]

My first ever warops.

I get really excited and buy a nade belt. We get to the station, and I very excitedly throw a frag.

Some greyshirt closes the airlock and the nade bounces and just...sits there, until it realizes it should explode and crit 3 members of our warops team.

So we get executed, and THE STATION STARTS TO BEHAVE LIKE WAROPS WAS OVER. There was a fourth nukie, and he switches to stealth ops. He starts SPECOSING PEOPLE, GETS THE DISKIE AND ARMS THE NUKE.

We actually won with that one unexpected loneops. I like to think that I secured that GT by killing 3/4ths of my team with the stupidest frag I ever thrown in any videogame ever.

[warbluke]

Once I spent the better part of an hour making colour-coded floor signs to direct you around the station. So there'd be a purple arrow with "SCI" written over it and a red one with "SEC" that sort of thing.
I asked the janitor to not erase it and he said "Sure" and then he did anyway and told me to fuck off when I got mad about it.

[WineAllWine]

Last night on Terry there were revs, and a HEADREV was chasing down the last remaining head, the CE. They got close and managed to trap the CE in their own office. The headrev started bashing in the glass to try to get in. And they bashed through.

Until they hit the grill, and the grid had enough power in it to instantly shock them into crit.

Absolute poetry to watch

[RedBaronFlyer]

one time i forgot to disable the option where not getting a job just gives you a random one and i ended up with curator. i decided to just roll with it and wanted to make the best library ever. so i started expanding it with the help of an assistant, we built tasteful wood floor, seating, shelves, doorways etc out into the halls, into other departments, and the entire time we enforced a no talking policy while in the library. you had to whisper or you were banned. except the library was a pretty sizeable chunk of the station at this point, so getting banned was a big deal.

this entire time i was low level messing with this other guy who kept coming along and breaking my many rules, so i finally decided to ban him from librarytopia, which had now seceded and claimed independence. that assistant turned out to be a traitor who came back and secured a syndie bomb to the centre of my empire. panicked and ready to die for my people (the books), i leapt onto the bomb and it exploded seconds later. gibbed me and sent my entire library down into the z-level below, where no one found my head.

i realized somewhere along the line i was supposed to be disappointed in this but it actually just turned out to be a really good story.

i am drearydoomius, king of kings, look upon my library ye mighty and despair.

I met an assistant from an antique server,
who said - "Two vast and empty book drops
stand in the station... near them, on the floor,
half destroyed, a shattered bust lies, who's frown
and wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold curatorship,
tell that its sculptor well those sternness read
which yet survive, carved on these lifeless things,
the hand that mocked them, and the heart that fed;
On the pedestal, these words appear:
My name is Drearydoomius, Curator of Curators; look upon my library, ye mighty, and despair!...
nothing beside remains, round the decay of empty bookshelves
boundless and bare, the lone and cold vacuum of space stretches far away."

[DrAmazing343]

I recall a round where a Captain who normally played Chief Engineer built a holofan'd burn chamber in the Bridge.

This went about as well as you could expect. Within half an hour, it'd breached to space and began venting itself, to the absolutely hilarity of the rest of the crew condemning the Captain.

The follow-up was one that actually astounded me; I had begun to not expect much from the Captain, but in one of the biggest turnarounds I've ever seen, they... built another burn chamber in the Meeting Room.

Yeah, no, I was fucking with you, THAT ONE BLEW UP AND SPILLED OUT INTO THE HALLS BECAUSE WHAT ELSE IS GONNA HAPPEN?

Sometimes, the story is too perfect. I loved it.

[NecromancerAnne]

The round before the big site crash we had was fun, there was a shoddy subversion law, I had a gimmick based on it, but then oops server box out.

You may not have seen it, but I pixel shifted a fedora onto your head that round

Last night on Terry there were revs, and a HEADREV was chasing down the last remaining head, the CE. They got close and managed to trap the CE in their own office. The headrev started bashing in the glass to try to get in. And they bashed through.

Until they hit the grill, and the grid had enough power in it to instantly shock them into crit.

Absolute poetry to watch

The CE planned that from the beginning, obviously.

[Not-Dorsidarf]

The round before the big site crash we had was fun, there was a shoddy subversion law, I had a gimmick based on it, but then oops server box out.

You may not have seen it, but I pixel shifted a fedora onto your head that round

Now i'm DOUBLE GRUMBLE for missing it

[Constellado]

I recall a round where a Captain who normally played Chief Engineer built a holofan'd burn chamber in the Bridge.

This went about as well as you could expect. Within half an hour, it'd breached to space and began venting itself, to the absolutely hilarity of the rest of the crew condemning the Captain.

The follow-up was one that actually astounded me; I had begun to not expect much from the Captain, but in one of the biggest turnarounds I've ever seen, they... built another burn chamber in the Meeting Room.

Yeah, no, I was fucking with you, THAT ONE BLEW UP AND SPILLED OUT INTO THE HALLS BECAUSE WHAT ELSE IS GONNA HAPPEN?

Sometimes, the story is too perfect. I loved it.

Was it the same captain that built a burn chamber in northstar Atmos one round and filled the entire station's waste pipe with said burn mix?

I feel major dissapointment in said captain.

There is no reason to do this unless revs just won and you are trying to ave- oh wait revs ends the round if they win now.

[DrAmazing343]

I believe so. Not very happy with their gaming, but it does make for interesting stories

[Donglesplonge]

i came back to the thread this morning and saw all the other threads i knew i should've copyrighted while i had the chance


I'M A FOOL!!!!!!

[DrAmazing343]

Royalties DOWN THE DRAIN!!

It’s officially OVER for POOR DONGLE!!!

[Donglesplonge]

I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO INVEST INTO FLUBBER EVER AGAIN!!!!!!!