[togopal] Snuffleupagus86 - Was told to wait a little bit to appeal perma. Figure I'd give it a shot

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Snuffleupagus
 
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[togopal] Snuffleupagus86 - Was told to wait a little bit to appeal perma. Figure I'd give it a shot

Unread postby Snuffleupagus » Sat Jul 14, 2018 12:41 am #426137

Byond account and character name: Snuffleupagus86- Ember McCleod
Banning admin:togopal
Ban type (What are you banned from?): Serverwide
Ban reason and length: Being a shitter to togopal in ahelps. Permanent.
Time ban was placed (including time zone): 21st of March 2018
Server you were playing when banned (Sybil or Bagil): Sybil

Your side of the story: On this day in particular I was goofing around and not taking much too seriously. It led to me tripping someone, tying them up, stripping them naked, putting them in an office chair and wheeling them around the station. I got Bwoink'd for it by togopal and if I recall correctly was actually pretty terse and rude with them in ahelps.

Why you think you should be unbanned: I apologize ahead of time guys. This is going to be long winded.

I think my ban was ultimately compounded by a couple of situations really. First of all. I just want to go out of my way to apologize again to togopal and any other admins that I've been disrespectful to or rude to in ahelps here. I didn't really have a full perspective on things when they went down, but now that I think about rounds themselves and how chaotic they can get for JUST a player? It's got to be infinitely more chaotic for admins who have to actively deal with the bullshit that WE the players are actively doing. The last thing you should deal with is an attitude. I know I can try to address this by changing my attitude when discussing things with an admin over ahelps, and attempting to change my demeanor when responding to them.

Second. For fucks sake do I have a bad habit of making ban appeals when I'm still pretty livid over the shit that just happened. The threads are literal dumpster fires and great examples of how NOT to do ban appeals. It's perfectly fine to walk the fuck away for a few moments and just let that shit simmer for a bit so you can actually reflect on the shit you were DOING to cause an admin to intervene in YOUR round to tell you that YOU'RE fucking up. Again I owe an apology here. I literally would just point the finger right back at the staff, and not think for a single moment 'hey shithead. There's a GOOD REASON they're messaging you.' This solves nothing for me. It just leaves a bad taste in everyone's mouth and again, disrupts things. I'm going to try in the future to step away a bit when things are getting tense, until I can address it with a level head. You probably won't like hearing this, but even if that means me completely closing out BYOND and eating a permaban until I can adequately address things in a calm and collected manner.

Third. I've had rounds where I was the other roboticist. It's not fun. It's no fun to release N2O (It's easy to do. It's annoying as fuck. No ones giggling but you.) It's not fun to be knocked out. Tied up. Stripped. Tossed into a chair and dragged around. Especially when it's the beginning of the round. (Again. No ones giggling but you.) I had a round when I was first starting that sticks out in my mind. I was trying to learn atmospherics and someone else spawned into atmospherics and just proceeded to table me over and over again. I recall how upset I had gotten. If I'm impacting someone else's round and disabling them to the point where they're not able to do anything for absolutely no fucking raisin when non antag? That's not okay. TG isn't about the games fun for me, not for you. It should be about being fun for the both of us. I think the time off helped me come to that realization.

Fourth. I included this one last. I probably shouldn't even mention it. It's not an excuse. I didn't know that Feem had put a last warning note in my notes. I wasn't notified. Would it have changed things? Probably not. I don't know, but I do know I always tried to adjust my behavior anytime in the past an admin messaged me about a specific behavior. I didn't fuck with the N2O anymore. I think I did mess with the Freon, but never to maliciously disrupt a round or stupidly impact a round again. It was always in the capacity of me attempting to set up the SM. I'm not trying to start shit with Feem, but it would have been nice to have them message me, in game or out, or at least let me know "Hey you're fucking up. Here's how you can change that."- They unknowingly to me added the note during my N2O unbannnening thread debacle.

I've had some time to really reflect on my style of play. Some days I'd really just get into the role, doing my job, minding my own business. I'd experiment with things (that's kind of the appeal of the game, you guys do a really good job of making so many different things to do inside of it that you can literally login and find something new every single session.) and more often than not it'd lead to some pretty interesting results. Other days I'd toe the edge. Goof around, ultimately ignore my role or the position and greytide/grief. Over time I've realized the latter is fine, and to an extent everyone does this, but there needs to be tactfulness behind it. At the end of the day there are other people who are logging in to enjoy the game just as much as you are. Cuban Pete Antags (They call me Cuban Pete. I'm the king of the Rumba beat.) are funny. Being a dumbfuck that opens a valve on an N2O canister or Freon Canister is not funny. Stripping someone naked, cuffing them and plopping them in an officer chair and wheeling them around isn't funny. It's being a dick. It's violating rule 1. Also Rule 0. Not everything is a conspiracy. No Togopal didn't ahelp you or focus on you for posting some shitty meme. They're doing it because you're on their radar. You're on their radar because you're no longer in the gray area. You're now toeing or over the line that breaks or violates the rules.

I'm asking you the admins to consider lifting my ban. I spoke at length with Armhulen and Togopal after the ban happened. I feel like we had some pretty good conversation. I realized a few things then, and over the time that I've had to reflect, and climb the steps to Nepal and consult a guru (I don't know if Armhulen is still around, but they should get that reference.) Let me prove to you that I can play this game without being a total cockmonger. Further. Let me prove to the admins that I can think of others and not just myself when it comes to my gameplay. Most of all, respect towards the players, and towards those who DO ahelp me. There's a reason for it. I need to stop and think and process why, and for what reason I'm being talked to, and have a discussion with the admins, not angrily reply to them.

Thank you for taking the time to read this, and any responses. I look forward to answering any questions, or any further responses.



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Togopal
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Re: [togopal] Snuffleupagus86 - Was told to wait a little bit to appeal perma. Figure I'd give it a shot

Unread postby Togopal » Sat Jul 14, 2018 3:01 am #426175

Have you been on any other server since you've been banned?
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Snuffleupagus
 
Joined: Thu Jun 01, 2017 3:08 am
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Re: [togopal] Snuffleupagus86 - Was told to wait a little bit to appeal perma. Figure I'd give it a shot

Unread postby Snuffleupagus » Sat Jul 14, 2018 11:08 pm #426341

Togopal wrote:Have you been on any other server since you've been banned?


Apologies for the delay first off! Eh. I knew you'd ask this. Not really. I uninstalled BYOND shortly after to just kind of take a break and then work/life kind of caught up with me in the middle of April. In fact there was a long stretch from the beginning of May until the end of May where I worked something like 22 days in a row. Its kind of how things work in the field I'm in. Eh, I realize how awful that sounds and you're probably thinking I didn't play on other servers because they had a reputation for being more 'strict.' or whatever, but that honestly that wasn't my M.O.

Like when I was doing the N2O stuff it was without the realization that it flat out fucking knocks you out, continuously. I got messaged over it. I ANGRILY made a rage thread pleading my case without actually fucking sitting down, chilling and talking to someone about WHY it's not a good idea and I never touched a tank as a "prank." again. I mean I still interacted with them when I was engineering and needed to set up the SM etc... I'm just a stupid person who liked to do stupid shit with tanks because it was 'easy.' and without realizing the full consequences of doing that stuff. I'm pretty sure most of my notes are about fucking with tanks. I was told not to fuck with tanks, and so I stopped.

Even as Antag I rarely would go out of my way to murderbone. I dislike murderboning. I get it, but eh it's just not my style. But that's besides the point. If I'm doing stuff to the point where I'm getting notes for it, than that means I need to not just change that specific behavior, but I also need to step back and think about my approach to the game as a whole when playing non-antag. There's different approaches I can take, especially when doing something or experimenting with stuff that could harm other crew members. Hell I can think of all of the times I went engineer and AHelped ahead of time to go "Hey this is my first time setting up the SM/Singulo/Tesulo." and the ahelps where I fucked up the SM and was PANICKING and the Admins were able to see my intent wasn't to blow everyone up, but fix the mistakes I made.

Please, just give me another chance Togopal? I realize you guys have probably been burned more often than not when you consider stuff like this, but maybe, just maybe I can be one of the few who really defies that perception.

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Togopal
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Re: [togopal] Snuffleupagus86 - Was told to wait a little bit to appeal perma. Figure I'd give it a shot

Unread postby Togopal » Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:38 am #426351

I'll give you 2 more months on this ban, then you can play as you want. Don't let something as silly as the incident you were banned for happen again
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Snuffleupagus
 
Joined: Thu Jun 01, 2017 3:08 am
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Re: [togopal] Snuffleupagus86 - Was told to wait a little bit to appeal perma. Figure I'd give it a shot

Unread postby Snuffleupagus » Sun Jul 15, 2018 7:38 am #426437

Togopal wrote:I'll give you 2 more months on this ban, then you can play as you want. Don't let something as silly as the incident you were banned for happen again


Thanks Togopal. I'm really hoping to prove to you guys that I can improve my quality of play. I appreciate it.

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CitrusGender
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Re: [togopal] Snuffleupagus86 - Was told to wait a little bit to appeal perma. Figure I'd give it a shot

Unread postby CitrusGender » Sun Jul 15, 2018 8:24 am #426449

I suppose I'll let Togopal determine the validity of this apology. I haven't seen anything as heartfelt like that in a while though, so I can see why he changed his stance. It's a really good turn around from the previous appeal thread.

Looks like this has been handled then.
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