Summer Woes

[Scones]

"Summer isn't that bad"

Stories of the amazingly hilarious summer new players go here. I'll start:

>CMO
>Revenant memeing the Captain
>decides to harass me instead
>spamming mindspike
>pack head and move on
>keeps doing it
>in morgue processing bodies
>hp very low
>lizard hop standing there
>get dropped into blinking HP
>"BRUISE PACK MY HEAD"
>he is holding a medkit
>"PACK MY HEAD NOW"
>"NOW"
>Revenant uncloaks, starts essence drain
>"FUCKING SHOOT IT"
>he's got his gun out
>he shoots me once
>die to drain
>he shoots at a wall a few times
>bruise packs my head once
>drops medkit and leaves me in the morgue

You'd think he was an antagonist playing the incompetent or something.

[CandyClown]

I'm getting an elitist tone from this post. Perhaps you forgot that people require time and practice to be good at something?

[Skyglazer]

blaming your on the epic summer meme : the thread

Why not just eat a brute patch or two so you can not die if you can't depend on the guy?

[Anonmare]

Come on man, we were all new once.
Though a new player should not be playing Head of Personnel. Command stuff should be played by people who have a handle on what they're doing and, ideally, should be one of themost experienced people in a department.

[TheNightingale]

They can't have been a roundstart HoP, if they were a lizard. Maybe promoted?

[Fiz Bump]

>Spawn in as fluke ops
>Half the team obviously has no idea what they are doing
>After many minutes of trying to explain the standard plan of 'Bomb tcomms, kill AI, bomb armory', we head out.
>I always bomb tcomms, so I'm off doing that with one other flop
>We plan to coordinate our armory and tcomms blasts for max confusion
>This means using the big red button
>I C4 my way into tcomms, summon my bomb, start to walk away
>Suddenly, the bomb blows up out of nowhere
>I am sent into crit, eventually die when singulo eats me after being dragged around maint for five minutes by my buddy
>Find out later that one of the other ops had no idea what the button did and was just spamming it on the shuttle as we placed our bomb

[dionysus24779]

>Find out later that one of the other ops had no idea what the button did and was just spamming it on the shuttle as we placed our bomb

That's funny and awesome. Newbie Nuke Op playing around with a shiny big red button, just classic.

[Ricotez]

what does this thing do?
*press press press*
hey dude what does this thing do?
*press press distant explosion*
dude I dont think this thing does anything at all
*press press press*

[DrunkenMatey]

They can't have been a roundstart HoP, if they were a lizard. Maybe promoted?

Exactly. And this is also why lizards aren't allowed to start head roles. We all know they are inferior to human beings; of course he failed to save you or kill the revenant.