post here to have your forumposting future revealed to you

[AnonymousForumUser]

I have recently come into possession of a mystical artifact, which allows me to glimpse into the future. I can reveal some if its secrets to you... for a small sacrifice in exchange. It could be anything, really. A cool rock you found, an helpful bit of advice, your firstborn child, anything, really. Do not ask me how I obtained the artifact.

*By replying, you agree that I am not to be held accountable for any damages caused by you trying to circumvent the inevitable.

[TheRex9001]

I have recently come into possession of a mystical artifact, which allows me to glimpse into the future. I can reveal some if its secrets to you... for a small sacrifice in exchange. It could be anything, really. A cool rock you found, an helpful bit of advice, your firstborn child, anything, really. Do not ask me how I obtained the artifact.

*By replying, you agree that I am not to be held accountable for any damages caused by you trying to circumvent the inevitable.

I have for you the most tragic lore exerpt in all of warhammer 40k.
Spoilers for the nightlords trilogy

► Show Spoiler

"‘What awaits us in the Maelstrom? What is the Hell’s Iris?’ Talos shook his head. ‘You will see with your own eyes, if the ship manages to hold together for long enough to actually reach the docks there.’ ‘So it’s a dock.’ ‘It’s... Octavia. I am a warrior, not a scribe or a literist. I lack the words to do it justice. Yes, Hell’s Iris is a dock.’ ‘You say that like it’s a curse. “I am a warrior”.’ Octavia licked her dry lips before speaking. ‘What did you want to do with your life?’ she asked. ‘I told you the truth: I’d always dreamed of guiding such a warship, and for better or worse, fate gave me what I wished for. But what about you? Do you mind if I ask?’ Talos laughed again, that same whispering chuckle, and tapped the defiled aquila emblazoned across his chest.

‘I wanted to be a hero.’ A moment later, he masked his scarred face behind his skulled helm. Red eye lenses stared at her, devoid of all emotion. ‘And look how that worked out.’"

[Armhulen]

My tribute is personifying each word in your signature into a superhero, alltogether they are part of a superhero team called "The Signatures"

Ribbit: A superhero who can transform into a giant frog and use his tongue as a whip. He can also communicate with amphibians and control water. He is the leader of the Signatures and often says “Ribbit” as his catchphrase.
Waiting: A superhero who can manipulate time and space. He can freeze, slow down, speed up, or reverse time for himself or others. He can also teleport and create portals. He is the strategist of the Signatures and often says “Waiting” as his taunt.
For: A superhero who can create and manipulate force fields. He can use them for defense, offense, or transportation. He can also shape them into different forms and sizes. He is the protector of the Signatures and often says “For” as his motto.
Something: A superhero who can shapeshift into anything he can imagine. He can also copy the abilities of whatever he transforms into. He is the infiltrator of the Signatures and often says “Something” as his alias.
To: A superhero who can link two objects or people together. He can make them share properties, effects, or sensations. He can also swap their positions or states. He is the supporter of the Signatures and often says “To” as his connector.
Happen: A superhero who can alter probability and cause random events to occur. He can make things more or less likely to happen, or create entirely new possibilities. He is the wildcard of the Signatures and often says “Happen” as his trigger.

[Chadley]

My tribute is... uh...


DOI I researched about how schizophrenics are werewolves

https://doi.org/10.1080/07420528.2019.1625054

► Show Spoiler

Objective: Findings on the effect of the lunar cycle on mental illness are conflicting. We investigated the association between the lunar cycle and a number of psychiatric presentations of schizophrenia and determined which subtypes were susceptible to lunar phases.

Methods: We evaluated 13,067 patients admitted to Zhumadian Psychiatric Hospital between January 1, 2012, and December 31, 2017 (73 lunar cycles). Patients were retrospectively assigned to lunar phase based on their admission date: new moon +/- 1 day, first quarter +/- 1 day, full moon +/- 1 day, and third quarter +/- 1 day. The International Statistical Classification of Diseases, 10th revision (ICD-10), was used for diagnosis. We used a Chi-squared goodness of fit test to evaluate the distribution of admissions across the lunar phase and R*C Chi-squared tests to compare age, sex, birth season, and clinical subtype distributions by phase. We used multiple logistic regression to further identify the relationship between clinical subtype and lunar phase.Results: Psychiatric admissions for schizophrenia varied significantly across the lunar cycle (χ2 = 36.400, p< .0001), peaking in the first quarter, followed by the full moon, and lowest at the new moon. Using unspecified schizophrenia (F20.9) as reference, people with paranoid schizophrenia (F20.0) were more likely to be admitted in the full moon than in other phases (odds ratio: 1.157, 95% confidence interval: 1.040-1.286) (p < .05); other subtypes showed no admission differences during the four lunar phases (p > .05).

Conclusions: Psychiatric admissions for schizophrenia show lunar periodicities. People with schizophrenia tend to be stable in the new moon, but their condition is easily aggravated during the first quarter and full moon. Patients with paranoid schizophrenia are more susceptible to deterioration at the full moon, so merit more attention and care from communities, families, and hospitals.

[Bawhoppennn]

My tribute is... uh...


DOI I researched about how schizophrenics are werewolves

https://doi.org/10.1080/07420528.2019.1625054

► Show Spoiler

Objective: Findings on the effect of the lunar cycle on mental illness are conflicting. We investigated the association between the lunar cycle and a number of psychiatric presentations of schizophrenia and determined which subtypes were susceptible to lunar phases.

Methods: We evaluated 13,067 patients admitted to Zhumadian Psychiatric Hospital between January 1, 2012, and December 31, 2017 (73 lunar cycles). Patients were retrospectively assigned to lunar phase based on their admission date: new moon +/- 1 day, first quarter +/- 1 day, full moon +/- 1 day, and third quarter +/- 1 day. The International Statistical Classification of Diseases, 10th revision (ICD-10), was used for diagnosis. We used a Chi-squared goodness of fit test to evaluate the distribution of admissions across the lunar phase and R*C Chi-squared tests to compare age, sex, birth season, and clinical subtype distributions by phase. We used multiple logistic regression to further identify the relationship between clinical subtype and lunar phase.Results: Psychiatric admissions for schizophrenia varied significantly across the lunar cycle (χ2 = 36.400, p< .0001), peaking in the first quarter, followed by the full moon, and lowest at the new moon. Using unspecified schizophrenia (F20.9) as reference, people with paranoid schizophrenia (F20.0) were more likely to be admitted in the full moon than in other phases (odds ratio: 1.157, 95% confidence interval: 1.040-1.286) (p < .05); other subtypes showed no admission differences during the four lunar phases (p > .05).

Conclusions: Psychiatric admissions for schizophrenia show lunar periodicities. People with schizophrenia tend to be stable in the new moon, but their condition is easily aggravated during the first quarter and full moon. Patients with paranoid schizophrenia are more susceptible to deterioration at the full moon, so merit more attention and care from communities, families, and hospitals.

Dude can you make a thread about just that alone I want to post about it

Also I have no tribute so I'll just dig outside the dumpster out back ok

[oranges]

[AnonymousForumUser]

I have for you the most tragic lore exerpt in all of warhammer 40k.
[...]

I don't know much about Warhammer but that seems pretty sad.

The dinner party... there will be casualties, or well there has been one already. More importantly though: someone is going to try to leave without paying. How you choose to handle this will decide not only your fate, but the fates of others as well.

My tribute is personifying each word in your signature into a superhero, alltogether they are part of a superhero team called "The Signatures"
[...]

I can't wait to see The Signatures use their diverse set of abilities in smart ways to defeat a varied cast of supervillains!

You will unwittingly set in motion a sequence of events that will later come to be known as the "Peanut Wars". Many will be lost along the way, with no time to mourn them. Hold on to your hope for a brighter future, or it will all be for nothing.
And another thing: April 26th, wave 83, a ceramic bloon bests the archer.

My tribute is... uh...
[...]

There's so much cool stuff written in scientific articles but they always use so many difficult words and they take so long to read.

You now know more about werewolves, but you have yet to consider what they know about you. This mistake will cost you dearly.

[AnonymousForumUser]

[...]
Also I have no tribute so I'll just dig outside the dumpster out back ok

Alright here's a special deal, just for you. You get it for free, just leave that stuff outside, leave it there. Just leave it, please. I just took out the trash like come on.

You — together with a number of other counters — will conspire against a fellow counter, for they will have wronged you for the last time...

[...]

Because I've had to stop Bawhoppennn from bringing all that garbage back inside.

Beware the beach day in early May. It's gonna rain.

[TheRex9001]

I have for you the most tragic lore exerpt in all of warhammer 40k.
[...]

I don't know much about Warhammer but that seems pretty sad.

The dinner party... there will be casualties, or well there has been one already. More importantly though: someone is going to try to leave without paying. How you choose to handle this will decide not only your fate, but the fates of others as well.

Please mercy seer, the dinner party will go as planned! I reject my fate.

[AnonymousForumUser]

Please mercy seer, the dinner party will go as planned! I reject my fate.

You may choose to walk this path, but it's consequences will be yours to bear (legally speaking).

*By replying, you agree that I am not to be held accountable for any damages caused by you trying to circumvent the inevitable.

[kinnebian]

My tribute is access to my signature cat thread.

[Chadley]

My tribute is... uh...
[...]

There's so much cool stuff written in scientific articles but they always use so many difficult words and they take so long to read.

You now know more about werewolves, but you have yet to consider what they know about you. This mistake will cost you dearly.

Species-specific felinid werewolf mutation instead of into a gorilla?

While we're at it, lizard-folk turning into actual lizards instead of monkification?
Felinids into real cats?


@arm

From one Arm to another. You hold the power to make it happen....

[The Wrench]

I’ll give you my friendship

[Armhulen]

My tribute is... uh...
[...]

There's so much cool stuff written in scientific articles but they always use so many difficult words and they take so long to read.

You now know more about werewolves, but you have yet to consider what they know about you. This mistake will cost you dearly.

Species-specific felinid werewolf mutation instead of into a gorilla?

While we're at it, lizard-folk turning into actual lizards instead of monkification?
Felinids into real cats?


@arm

From one Arm to another. You hold the power to make it happen....

Species changes are so hard to do :*( I'd be down for dna mutant though thats dope

[TheLoLSwat]

yeah sure

[Armhulen]

yeah sure

wheres your offering

[NoxVS]

I hope my future is that I'm not here anymore

As for offering - Did you know that you have a mutant color even if you are human? You can access this by setting your species to lizard, choosing a mutant color, and then switching back to your original race. This impacts your color if you get changed into a lizard, slimeperson, or podperson ingame.

[Chadley]

yeah sure

wheres your offering

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dEImF0k1pEs

[TheLoLSwat]

yeah sure

wheres your offering

oh dont worry, im no stranger to these things



here you go pal

[Armhulen]

This Is A Tire

[CMDR_Gungnir]

My tribute is a warning of mortal peril.

If you walk down that alleyway, I'm going to mug you.

[WineAllWine]

My tribute is a mildly interesting fact: UTC (as in the timezone) doesn't stand for anything. The English speaking world wanted to go with "Coordinated Universal Time" (CUT), but the French wanted "temps universel coordoneé" (TUC) so as a compromise we got UTC, pleasing no-one.

[Misdoubtful]

My tribute is nothing but my presence

[AnonymousForumUser]

My tribute is access to my signature cat thread.

Calypso is a good cat name.

The day you went to the cloning center was the day your fate got shattered into many shards. You can try to put it back together but some pieces will still be missing. As for your shard: you will post another picture of Calypso in the cat thread, please?

I’ll give you my friendship

I expect to be able to call upon you in my time of need (when I'm about to get mugged by CMDR_Gungnir).

The counting... victory is in sight. Even if you have to get your hands dirty.

I hope my future is that I'm not here anymore

As for offering - Did you know that you have a mutant color even if you are human? You can access this by setting your species to lizard, choosing a mutant color, and then switching back to your original race. This impacts your color if you get changed into a lizard, slimeperson, or podperson ingame.

That's neat, I gotta remember to customize my inner lizard on my character.

In the end none of us will be here anymore. But in the meantime, you will see a picture of a pretty cool lizard somewhere down the line.

[Notgonnabreaktherule]

i offer Windows 98 Second Edition as a tribute

[Armhulen]

taking a quick breather in the refreshing goodposting thread before going back to shooting the shit

[AnonymousForumUser]

[...]
here you go pal

A tire? Sure whatever I guess. You could've given like a cool coin or something but hey who cares (not me). On an unrelated note did you know I can do curses as well

A great calamity will befall upon your forum account. Mere days remain.

My tribute is a warning of mortal peril.

If you walk down that alleyway, I'm going to mug you.

Thanks but I'm gonna ignore that warning because I cannot die.

The alley will seal your fate. Enter at your own peril.

My tribute is a mildly interesting fact: UTC (as in the timezone) doesn't stand for anything. The English speaking world wanted to go with "Coordinated Universal Time" (CUT), but the French wanted "temps universel coordoneé" (TUC) so as a compromise we got UTC, pleasing no-one.

A tale as old as (coordinated universal) time.

Victim of the Second Peanut War.

[datorangebottle]

I bring you something important (and definitely not stolen).

[NoxVS]

I hope my future is that I'm not here anymore

As for offering - Did you know that you have a mutant color even if you are human? You can access this by setting your species to lizard, choosing a mutant color, and then switching back to your original race. This impacts your color if you get changed into a lizard, slimeperson, or podperson ingame.

That's neat, I gotta remember to customize my inner lizard on my character.

In the end none of us will be here anymore. But in the meantime, you will see a picture of a pretty cool lizard somewhere down the line.

I haven't seen a picture of a cool lizard but I did see an actual cool lizard, does that count or do I still have a cool lizard picture in my future?

[AnonymousForumUser]

My tribute is nothing but my presence

That's a bit abstract but I guess did say anything.

Many false requests for headmin review approach. Pick the right one or all will turn to dust.

i offer Windows 98 Second Edition as a tribute

Sweet! I've been waiting to update my operating system so I don't have to shell out for windows 11 through 97.

Consumed by the forum creature.

I bring you something important (and definitely not stolen).

You can keep that one. I'm worried a bug might crawl through the portal when I'm using it. What if it doesn't know how to get back, it would never be able to see its bug family again it's so sad.

Some will say the bottle is half empty. Others will say that it is half full. But we can all agree that it is orange.

[...]
I haven't seen a picture of a cool lizard but I did see an actual cool lizard, does that count or do I still have a cool lizard picture in my future?

The cool lizard picture is still on the way. Actual lizards cannot be predicted because of a pact their kind has made with the universe.

► Show Spoiler

(that's not a lizard that's a salamander so unfortunately you'll still have to wait)

[Itseasytosee2me]

As offering, a poem.

Ahem,

Thy future spins and turns and twists and the cold man tries to hide it.
Only pain and punishment will skew the mind, reward can only guide it.
The bronze man takes the cold man and punishes him with shame.
So the cold man holds the future up so the bronze man can learn his name.
The bronze man finds his name in silver, scrawled in blinding white
His name is sharp and tactful like the blade that cuts through night.
But the cold man grows in weariness and would like to return to sleep,
So while thy future spins in air, to the darkness he does creep.
But the bronze man pains and pains and pains and pains and pains and pains and pains and pains and he wish his blood would leave his bronze body because it is what pains and pains and pains and pains his blood aches he feels aching in every vein no not his vein his blood all his blood hurts he feels his blood hurt.
And the cold man smokes himself to death.

[Epicgamer545]

I’ll give you a traffic cone. I stole it from Birdshot. Works really good as a hat.
I’ll also throw in my winter hat because I’m tired of wearing it now.

…pains and pains and pains and pains and pains and pains and pains and pains and pains and pains and pains…

Ouch. You need some Tylenol?

[AnonymousForumUser]

As offering, a poem.

Ahem,

[...]

I'm not good at interpreting these sorts of things but it does sound interesting.

You will inherit not only boons but curses as well. Beware the forum creature's wrath.

I’ll give you a traffic cone. I stole it from Birdshot. Works really good as a hat.
I’ll also throw in my winter hat because I’m tired of wearing it now.

[...]

Yes, more for the hat collection. Still haven't been able to play a round on Birdshot, but I'll keep a lookout for floor marks indicating a missing traffic cone in case I ever do.

Many tough ratings ahead. The journey ahead is perilous but it will be worth it.



You all have given me a lot of stuff and I don't know where to put it all. Thanks for attending and try not to get eaten by the forum creature!