Spicy Pillow phone chronicles

[Timonk]

Welcome, average players club enjoyers.
Today will be the first day(night) of the Spicy Pillow phone chronicles (SPPC).

As an introduction, today during uni i noticed that my phone was getting very hot for no reason. i took off my phone case to inspect it and i found out that it is indeed, slightly spicy and already bulging my slim phone. its not enough to be noticed immediately but enough that i can feel it, see it and i can also literally seesaw it when i lay it down. of course, i turned it off immediately. its partly my fault that its spicy because i left it plugged in 24/7 while also sleeping on it. i also suspect my charger to be sus. My plan is to get it replaced in the next week or so because my parents are also cutting me out of the mobile plan. switching the battery was originally an option but since i may be cut out of the mobile plan i can get a 1€ phone from some ass tariff and i dont have to replace the battery that way.

Tonight, i have to sleep next to it while it is on, because i need the alarm clock function to get up in time.i am kinda scared because heating up for no reason is definitely not a new behaviour. it just got to the point that it started bulging and cracking my screen protector. anyways. i hope i dont burn to death with phone splitters in my head in my own bed tonight, or next week even. i probably have to charge it too some time, i will keep updating every day.
These chronicles will end when i give my phone away to be recycled, destroyed or what have you. i will not tolerate spicy pillows in MY flat.

[Jacquerel]

wow its almost ready to hatch, you can encourage the new life within to emerge faster by blowing on the device gently using a hair dryer

[warbluke]

I had this happen to me once but it was a laptop. I still use it but the thing tends to bluescreen five times in a row every few weeks.

[Turbonerd]

Get a really loud alarm, then put the phone somewhere not on your bed, then sleep with a fire extinguisher instead.

[conrad]

You've been sleeping 24/7? How the hell are you typing any of this?

[Timonk]

Day 2

i survived.
no thanks to my quick wits and huge brain, i decided to put the phone on the floor next to my bed. that way i wouldnt have my face burned off if it did explode.
i found out my ISP charged me 45€ for plugging in my router, a service i didnt even request. i signed a new mobile data plan with them, i will also be getting a new phone because of this. i have also decided to keep my phone around because i might as well do it and experiment on it (changing a phone battery for the first time, as an example.) i hope it doesnt explode on me before i change the battery, though.

[Timonk]

Day 3

I noticed that there is wiggle room at the site of inflation (i can press down my display and it pops back up). i charged my phone for the second time since i noticed its inflating today. i might be imagining things, but i think its getting worse.

[conrad]

Whatever you do resist the urge to stab the battery.

It won't explode or catch fire. It'll just ruin your battery.

[Timonk]

Thank you. I will take your advice and shank it instead.

[Timonk]

Also it will very well catch fire because the gas released is very flammable

[Timonk]

Day 4
Another day where I am alive.
I discovered the order for my new phone didn't go through because they tried ridding me of an additional 100€ because they can't get their prices straight in the shop. I managed to get that down to 60€. Tomorrow I start programming in Java at 8am on a Monday. I hope I will survive until then.

[oranges]

Why do you sleep on your phone?

[Timonk]

Why do you sleep on your phone?

lack of space and i also thought it didnt damage it

[Timonk]

Day 5
I have charged it for a third time. maybe i will burn tomorrow, or never. i do not know. nightmares of burning to death keep haunting me. i hope this will end soon.

[Jacquerel]

i hope this will end soon.

there are probably other ways you should word this to avoid tempting fate

[Timonk]

there are probably other ways you should word this to avoid tempting fate

Day 6
Oh god. i had to charge it for a 4th time today. something is going to happen soon. my postal carrier announced that my new phone was coming within 1 hour before it was actually delivered and of course it was while i was in uni. it of course couldnt be delivered since i am not a low life who sits at home at 10.30 am on a tuesday (unlike tomorrow where i will sleep at 10.30am on a wednesday) i am going to have to pick up my new phone from a packing station tomorrow. i hope my flat wont go up in flames while i am at uni or while i am picking up my new phone since i am not insured yet. praying rn.

[NecromancerAnne]

ITT: Timonk cooks a firebomb in his bedroom.

[Timonk]

ITT: Timonk cooks a firebomb in his bedroom.

Who wouldn't?

[Timonk]

Day 7: i died

[EmpressMaia]

im going to put timonk in the clone vat

[Timonk]

day 10: i revived like Jesus Christ

[NecromancerAnne]

How's the new phone?

[Timonk]

How's the new phone?

Bigger and heavier

[Timonk]

i just noticed that it does not have a headphone jack

[iwishforducks]

bro they removed the headphone jack like 10 years ago

[Timonk]

bro they removed the headphone jack like 10 years ago

t. iPhone virgin