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Golem normal.png
Access: None
Difficulty: Medium
Supervisors: Your creator, if you have one.
Duties: Serve your creator utterly.
Guides: No external guides.
Quote: Hey I think Xenobiology is making an army of golems!

Golems are sapient humanoids made of mystical living stone, created through strange rituals or xenobiological research. They are completely devoted to their creator and will carry out any order given to them, but occasionally a colony of free-willed Golems can be found on the surface of Lavaland.

Their intrinsic properties make them natural miners. Their toughness and obedience makes them ideal as Bodyguards, Security and Engineers. Their nature of creation means they often assist in Research areas, but due to their single-minded devotion and lack of availability they are seldom seen in Medical and Command roles.

Creating a Golem

Golems are created by spawning and completing a shell.

  • There are four ways to create shells:
    • Injecting 1 unit of plasma into an Adamantine Slime Extract, then using the resulting Adamantine bar to form a shell.
    • On the free golem ship, use the Golem Creation Disk to print one on the Autolathe.
    • 20 ingots of metallic hydrogen can be used to form a shell.
    • Fishing on Icebox in the liquid plasma to get adamantine then making it into a shell
  • After this, using 10 of any type of mineral on the shell will complete it, sending a warning to ghosts and observers, who can inhabit it at will to spawn as a golem. If the mineral type used could transform the golem, they will spawn in that form (though it will naturally expire after five minutes).
  • Golems created from Adamantine bars will serve whoever finished the shell, while golems created with the autolathe on the free golem ship will have free will.


Due to being made of rock Golems take less damage from most sources and do not need to breathe. They do not bleed and are immune to electrocution, lava, and radiation, and their stone exterior cannot be pierced, dismembered, or set on fire. They are not totally immune to the effects of temperature or pressure however, so they can still be harmed by the depths of space or the intense heat of an inferno. Their fists are more dangerous and more liable to stun than those of an unarmed human, what with being larger and made of stone.

With their immense strength golems can carve through solid rock with their hands, and have an innate ability to detect nearby ores. In addition if they plant their feet in lava they can smelt ore into metal bars in a body cavity.

The most unique of their traits however is the ability to take on the properties of minerals they consume. Eating certain kinds of mineral will temporarily change the form of the golem and grant it additional properties for the next five minutes.

Keeping a body of stone animate takes a lot of energy, and so resultingly golems need to eat a lot of minerals to stay active. Golems can safely eat iron and glass without transforming (and iron is very filling) but once they have taken on a transformation then they can only consume that kind of mineral (and glass) until the transformation has expired. A golem who is hungry begins to slow down until they find themselves completely unable to move and must be fed in order to regain motion.

Golems can be stunned in the same ways a human can, with the exception of syringe guns due to their thick skin; they take damage normally, after it is reduced by their armor, but they do not bleed. When in crit, instead of suffocating, they'll take brute damage over time, and cannot give or receive CPR.

Golem hands are too large to operate the triggers of most guns and most human equipment is not the correct size for them to wear. Golems are unable to equip jumpsuits, masks, oversuits, gloves, or shoes. They can pin an ID card to their stone chest and are free to differentiate themselves by wearing different hats, belts, or backpacks.

Edible Minerals

Golems gain temporary traits from the minerals they have consumed.

Appearance Material Effect
Golem normal.png Iron Iron is a staple food for golems. It does not transform them, but it is more filling than any other kind of mineral and will heal them upon consumption. Unfortunately this benefit is only available if they haven't taken on a different material transformation.
Golem normal.png Glass Glass does not transform a golem, and it isn't particularly filling either. Its sole selling point is that you can eat glass regardless of your current transformation, meaning that you can substitute a lot of glass for more valuable or rarer minerals.
Golem silver.png Silver Silver golems are holy, and immune to supernatural effects. A favourite tool of wizards for hunting other wizards.
Golem gold.png Gold Gold golems are covered with shining plates which reflect energy weaponry, plus they provide a living display of their owner's wealth.
Golem uranium.png Uranium Uranium golems take their energy from internal radiation, and resultingly act as if their stomach is full until the buff expires. This is a convenient mineral just for general use as just a single ore allows you to ignore the hunger mechanics for five minutes, but it does mean foregoing any more interesting bonus.
Golem titanium.png Titanium Titanium golems become even tougher in melee combat. They take even less brute damage and their punches are even harder.

Their fists gain an even larger benefit when fighting mining creatures, making this a potentially useful choice for hunting the lesser fauna of Lavaland or Icebox.

Golem plasma.png Plasma Plasma golems gain plasma's cooling and energy-generating properties. They become immune to damage from heat and high pressure and additionally at any time when they would take heat damage, that damage is converted into power for the nearest APC. It also lends golems on Lavaland immunity to ash storms.

This mineral is counterintuitively useful for firefighting, for wading through laser fire, or alternately for setting up an unusual method of power generation.

Golem diamond.png Diamond Diamond golems bend light around them, becoming difficult to see. They quickly become invisible while stood still, and are slightly faster than usual while in motion.
Golem plasteel.png Plasteel Plasteel golems grow plates which seal them against the effects of low pressure and temperature, effectively becoming space-proof. This is the mineral of choice for a golem sent on an exploratory mission, or to repair a hull breach.
Golem banana.png Bananium Bananium golems develop a funny walk and become slippery when lying on the ground. Additionally, they cannot be slipped themselves.

While they make a natural ally to a clown, remember that keeping this form active for long periods may require consuming industrial levels of bananium. Timing is everything in comedy.

Golem bluespace.png Bluespace Polycrystals Eating a bluespace crystal will create a Bluespace Knot in an available hand. Clicking on a distant location with your Bluespace Knot will transfer you to a location approximately close to where you clicked after a few seconds.

Bluespace crystals can be consumed while under the effect of a different transformation, as long as you have an available hand.

Golem gibtonite.png Gibtonite Eating Gibonite will transfer it to an available single hand, from which it can be fired at distant targets like a cannon. Make sure you have a plan for how to use it, as holding in gibtonite for too long will cause it to drop to your feet after some time, with its fuse lit.

As Gibtonite only transforms your hand, it can be used under the effect of other transformative effects. You can have two gibtonite hands at a time, but the second requires a friend to feed it to you as you are unable to use both hands to pick up a second while one of your hands is occupied by the first.

Golem normal.png Lightbulbs Eating a lightbulb will cause the golem to emit light for two minutes. This can be done at any time, but lightbulbs have no nutritional value.

Free Golems

Free golems were freed from servitude by a scientist they revere as The Liberator. In his infinite and divine wisdom, he set their clan free to travel the stars with a single declaration:

"Yeah go do whatever."

Sometimes one of these ships may end up crashing in Lavaland. These golems, should they wake up from hibernation, will effectively be free of any master, and will usually mine and eventually build their own R&D department. They are peaceful unless disturbed.

Free Golems start with a Golem Creation Disk, which contains a unique autolathe design that creates a Golem Shell, without any need for slimes. Unlike those made in xenobiology, however, golems made from these shells are not enslaved to their creator.